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Approved Lore Okins Corporate Defence Fleet

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OUT OF CHARACTER INFORMATION
  • Intent: Create a private navy for Okins Industry
  • Image Credit: Image Credit & Symbol
  • Permissions: N/A
  • Links: N/A
GENERAL INFORMATION
  • Fleet Name: Okins Corporate Defence Fleet
  • Classification: Private Fleet/Company Defence Fleet
  • Affiliation:
  • Fleet Symbol: Okins Industry Symbol
  • Description: The Okins escort fleet acts as the defensive fleet of Okins Industries. The fleet acts like Okins Security Troopers the defence fleet has a special relationship with Okins Industries, holding allegiance to both the Company and the Okins family. The fleet itself fields a variety of Okins Industry products.
SOCIAL INFORMATION
  • Headquarters: Vergesso-Class Mobile Factory
  • Ports of Call: Corellia
  • Goals: Protect Okins Industries assets and serve the interests of the Okins family
  • Reputation: The fleet is not well known, rarely taking any form of action aside from Okins Industries related business.
COMPOSITION INFORMATION
MEMBERS
HISTORICAL INFORMATION
When Okins Industries took to space aboard the Vergesso Kizar knew instantly it would need a fleet to help protect it. Initially starting with a 4 Vigil-Class Star Cruisers but it soon grew in size as Kizar gave it another purpose, to protect his position as the head of Okins Industries. Sooner or later someone will try to take his company or his interests challenged. Sooner or later a fleet loyal to you only will be able to repel these threats. In secret he built it up, allocating more ships to the defence fleet and procuring additional ships from other companies. The fleet staffed with many former military personnel and loyal members from his security branch the corporate defence fleet is a force to be reckoned with. Despite this Kizar has kept them quiet, relegated to company business but that could all change with a snap of his fingers.
 
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i'm in ur codex, judgin ur subz
Codex Judge
Kizar Okins Kizar Okins

I apologize for your wait. There are certain Factory rules that apply to the Codex when it comes to Fleet submissions and I consulted with the Factory staff regarding one in particular.

Overall, this is excellent. There is just three points that I want to address.

Before I do that, let me cite the applicable rule.
This divides the board into three general categories, which apply to Codex submissions involving fleeting. Those are: Individuals, Companies or Minor Factions, and finally Major Factions. Of those three categories, only Companies, Minor Factions, and Major Factions can have a fleet. Individuals cannot fleet.

For that reason, the following statements in the submission are problematic, because they suggest that your PC uses this as a private fleet for non-company interests.

1. Intent.
Intent: Create a private navy for this character and Okins Industry
This should be clear that this is a private navy for Okins Industry.

2. Description.
Description: The Okins escort fleet acts as the defensive fleet of Okins Industries but also acts a s a private fleet for Kizar Okins himself to use and further his own interests
The highlight here addresses the problematic statement. As your character owns Okins Industries, I imagine that Kizar's interests and the company's interests largely coincide, but it should be clear that the purpose of the fleet is to advance the interests of the company (even if Kizar is the one deciding those priorities).

3. Historical Information.
Initially starting with a 4 Vigil-Class Star Cruisers but it soon grew in size as Kizar gave it another purpose, to become his own personal fleet.
Same comment as above. This should be nuanced to distinguish the company from the corporate leader, with the fleet serving the former.

Those are my thoughts. Please let me know if you have any questions or concerns in light of my comments. Otherwise, please tag me when you have completed any edits.
 
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