Star Wars Roleplay: Chaos

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Approved Species Nimscall Terraformer

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OOC INFO

Intent
: Provide Bryn'adul war-machine with local terraformer to allow quick entrenchment on environmentally unfriendly world

Image Credit: Pinterest

Canon: N/A

Permissions: N/A

Links:


Bryn'adul

Draelvasier

Draemidus Prime

Nimscall Drop Pod

GENERAL INFO

Name
: Nimscall Terraformer

Designation: Semi-sentient

Origins: Draemidus Prime

Average Lifespan: 2GSY

Estimated Population: Rare

PHYSICAL INFO

Breathes:

  • Type I
  • Type II
  • Type III

Average Height of Adults: 10m

Average Length of Adults: 3m

Skin color: White/Red

Hair color: None

Distinctions:

  • Cephalopod-like physiology
  • Respiration-based energy production
  • Non-reproductive
  • Tailored DNA

Races: None

Force Sensitivity: NFU

Strengths:

  • Universal Respiration - The Nimscall is purpose grown for the conversion of most atmospheres. Only extreme toxicity or the lack of an atmosphere at all will stop its breathing
  • Hard Shell - The Nimscall descends encased in a drop pod designed to withstand the immense stresses of reentry that protects the majority of its fleshy body in extremely resistant material
Weaknesses:
  • Open Top - It's "Mouth" is exposed to allow respiration to proceed unimpeded. A direct attack, whether sustained fire or explosive will critically harm or kill it
  • Toxic Air - While the Nimscall is designed specifically to convert as many different atmospheres as possible into the more homely, violent and charged air the Drael species enjoy, if the Nimscall is given an especially toxic aerosol, it may fail to respire, absorb the toxins and like any other lifeform, die as a result
CULTURE

Diet
: Derives energy from respiration

Communication: Do not conventionally communicate. Responsible for the co-ordination of the Bryn'adul's various war-creatures via telepathic means, members of the Shaman Caste can monitor, interpret and influence the Nimscall's relatively simple brainwaves the same way they do most other beasts via force-based telepathy unique to their race.

Technology level: N/A

Religion/Beliefs: N/A

General behavior: A utility species that do not behave outside of their function as a local terraformer. Nimscalls breathe. Until they die.

HISTORICAL INFO

A creation spearheaded by Warrior and Bio-engineer Shaman Hrajlmak'Natok. The Nimscall Terraformer was, among others, a response to the rapidly growing Bryn'dul war-machine to aid invasion forces in the conquering of environmentally unfriendly worlds. The Nimscall is dropped from orbit encased within a Nimscall Drop Pod. After reaching a certain, calculated velocity, opens like a 4-paneled clamshell to airbrake and mitigate reentry burns and reduce the force of the final impact. Once on the surface, the Nimscall secures itself by digging its tentacles into the ground and the airbrakes are retracted for cover. Protected and secure, the Nimscall begins to respire. Inhaling the atmosphere and, after undergoing complex biological reactions, spews a gas very similar to the atmosphere on the Bryn'adul's home world of Draemidus Prime. The average Nimscall can produce millions of tons of Draemidus Gas a year.
Draemidus atmosphere is a red, extremely dense and thick air that is heavily composed of what many species would consider pollutants. Its charged nature disrupts any in-going/outgoing radio-based communications.

Nimscalls are dropped from space and carpet a predetermined area chosen for its remoteness and isolation from opposition forces. Within hours an area many miles across can be smothered in the air the Drael call home. This allows the Bryn'adul invasion force the perfect environment to set up a forward operation and quickly entrench themselves, regardless of the natural state of the planet. Due to the noxious makeup of the aerosol Nimscall's produce, the newly altered local climate will forcefully exclude any natives not employing special respiration apparatus, giving the Bryn'adul an almost entirely isolated staging area.
 
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Hrajlmak'Natok Hrajlmak'Natok

1.) The previous Nimscall Terraformer Submission has been archived.

2.) Template: You can add fields to the template to add depth to your submission, however, you can't remove any. If part of the template is not applicable for your species simply put: "N/A". As you can see below you are missing "Permissions" from out of character information.
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3.) Under Strengths: What is a "Hel Shard Variant" in this context? Are you talking about a material or are you talking about the Hel Shard Drop Pods the like history seems to imply? Those seem to be designed to carry about 20 brutes. Not creatures like this. Please clarify and link appropriately.

4.) Communication: When referring to members of the "Shaman Caste" you may wish to elaborate or explain who they are or how this is done. Most people reading your submission will not be intimately aware of the Bryn or the Drael.

5.) The submission states that it is designed to terraform worlds into something the Drael prefer. It would be good to know exactly what that is. Hot? Cold? Is it noxious? What effects could it have on flora, fauna, near-humans, etc. All of these things are inherently connected.

While the Nimscall is designed specifically to convert as many different atmospheres as possible into the more homely, violent and charged air the Drael species enjoy...

The above is a good start, but, it could really use a little more information. The words "violent and charged" are poignant in painting a picture but it doesn't actually provide information that writers would need to know in a PVP setting. This is important because that is exactly what this seems to be designed for.

It's a neat idea with a weird, strange species, that achieves a very important goal. Nice work on converting it from the old one. This one makes much more sense--It just needs a little tweaking.

Tag me when you're ready and I'll re-review.
 
Srina Talon Srina Talon

Updates:

  • Defined communication between Shaman and Nimscall
  • Replaced 'Hel Shard variant' with 'Nimscall Drop Pod' sub
  • expanded description to include some more detail on Drael atmosphere
Should be ready for live when Er'gerak and Nimscall Pod are verified
 
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