Jumping On The Bandwagon

[Josh Dragovalor]

I've been here over a year now, on and off. And never once asked for a critique on my character.

Say whatcha want, I'll take it all into consideration. Or ignore it. One of the two

I'd like to hear both what you thought of Jedi Master Joshua DragonsFlame before he left, as well as this "New" Joshua DragonsFlame that has returned to the galaxy recently.

 

[Gherron Dragovalor]

Both before and after he left, Josh was something of a big figure for Gherron, someone he always looked up to, and a good friend. As a writer, I really enjoy the character, as he has a lot of back story and experience. Extremely well-written, in my opinion.

 

[Alexandra Feanor]

[member="Joshua DragonsFlame"]

You are a bit too Egotistic and pompous as a Jedi... past that i like your character and have always enjoyed out RPs... oh and you owe me a post mister.

 

[Valiens Nantaris]

[member="Joshua DragonsFlame"]
I honestly cannot tell what gender you are based on your pictures....

I also think your characters can be just a 'little' too full of themselves and written in a way which makes hordes of NPCs fall in love with him. For those who get the reference, a Hawk Hinata.

On the other hand your writing structure is always good and you're good at exposition.

 

[Lord Ghoul]

I voice the same sentiments as the above. The new Dragonsflame feels very arrogant for a Jedi. The snark part of his title could use a little more work as some times his comments seem more slapstick than stinging. And the dragon currently feels more like a prop than one of his most loyal friends, very wooden. I'd like to see him and the dragon in a non-combat bonding moment.

 

[Valiens Nantaris]

Also, is that dragon submitted to the codex as an NPC?

 

[Alexandra Feanor]

[member="Valiens Nantaris"]

Pretty sure NPC creations in the codex are optional... cough cough

 

[Valiens Nantaris]

[member="Alexandra Lianne Feanor"]
Except for dragons where they are compulsory.

Check out the banned species list.

 

[Alexandra Feanor]

... Right... forgot about the banned species list... -sticks to writing non-flying mortal chars-

 

[Josh Dragovalor]

[member="Valiens Nantaris"] [member="Alexandra Lianne Feanor"] The funny thing is, while the way I write the character paints him in a light that seems like he's full of himself, he doesn't actually have much of an ego at all. He'll be the first to downplay what he does as "It was nothing" when the situation merits it. But speaking of...

[member="Mikhail Shorn"]: Aye, there is a bit of an edge of arrogance in the new DragonsFlame. Not enough to eclipse his personality and his usual nature, as mentioned above, but it was a new little detail, albeit small, to really drive home that he's no longer a member of the Order, and no longer follows all of the tenants he used to. If that detail stays... Well, that's what I love about character development. Things can change at any given time. As for the dragon... THAT is the type of criticism I was hoping for. I just might fix that, actually... Thank you.

As for the submission thing... Aye, the dragon was born (I've had the egg, in preparation for hatching it when Josh was ready since September 2013) before the NPC submissions were a thing. I've already been informed that while I'm allowed to have it, I have to submit it before it can be used in true combat. I'll be working on that when I have time, and have already asked someone to go through the process with me.