"This is probably a bad time," she huffed as they ducked behind some clutter for cover. Blaster bolts scorched overhead and Alkor busied himself with a thermal detenator from his bandolier. He grunted, but he wasn't going to tell her not to speak. "I wanted to say I was sorry."
"Asha, if you're going to apologize to them, do it after they're dead." He stood once the fire stopped intermittently, enough that he could poke his head out and get an angle. "Twenty meters," he muttered to himself. Oh well.
He lobbed the explosive with all the might he could muster in one arm, then hurriedly dropped. "I'm serious," Asha huddled close to the refuse as the explosion wreathed the battlefield in purifying fire. She felt the heat through her armor and shivered. Death was closer than usual, and though she had hunted before, it was still foreign for her.
Maybe that was what brought this on. The girl watched as he stood fast and stepped into the fray fearlessly, unable to comprehend his composure. [member="Keira Verd"] had suggested that they go into battle together so that Asha could get a better feel for the person Alkor was. They had only ever bickered, and she found herself in awe not of him as a man, but as a warrior.
"I don't think I've ever respected you," she said as she unslung her own rifle and tried to keep pace. Alkor was relentless. "Not the way I should, I mean."
He raised his assault rifle and took a shot. The HUD did all the work- he just pulled the trigger reflexively. The pirate fell to the dirt, brain matter splayed around his head. "Asha, you do a lot for Keira and Ginnie, and that's important. Don't worry about me. Keira's right. I'm never around. I don't spend enough time with the family. Don't feel obligated to apologize to me."
"I don't-" she started to say, but stopped short. No, in fact, she did. That wasn't going to cut it. This wasn't the way that she needed to say what she meant. "Nevermind," she sighed. Another pair of pirates peeked over a barricade and Alkor bullseyed one of them between the eyes. Asha gunned the other down with three quick bolts. "Why don't you spend more time at home?" she asked.
"Before, it was guilt," he told her. "What I mean is, I left with Isley. I followed him and put the Clan second. I still think Keira forgave me too quickly. So, I spent all my time working and sending money back to Ashrah. I thought providing for everyone was the most good I could do for them."
She seemed puzzled by that. Alkor continued. "I think at some point, I realized what family actually meant, and it terrified me. To care about others- that concept alone is so far from anything I had ever experienced, the very thought of a close-knit group made me want to run as far as I could."
"What made you change your mind?" she asked.
He rested the rifle on his shoulder and glanced toward the armored girl pensively. "Responsibility follows you everywhere," he said after a moment of reflection. "It doesn't go away just because you run from it. Eventually, you have to stop running and face your challenges head on."
Asha thought about that for a long time. They moved across the battlefield in silence, the charred corpses of Alkor's victims a quiet reminder of their duty. There were other pirates and occasional gunfights, but the fear slowly dissolved in her chest. "Will you come home, even though you're Warmaster now?" she asked.
It felt like a pointless question, but after all that talk about responsibility it seemed pertinent. Alkor considered it before he answered. "My mother was an addict," he told her. "I grew up in the slums of Corellia, stealing food in order to eat."
Hardly the answer she had expected. She glanced at him as he opened up in a way he never did. "At that time, it seemed like the right thing to do was whatever I needed to in order to survive. Looking back, I never asked for help. I never tried to find a better way. I just tried to take everything on myself."
There were things Alkor only learned after years of hardship and making the wrong decision. He recognized it now, after being given a family and friends, and after learning to care about things. About people. "There is no changing the past, but armed with what I now know, I can decide what the future will be like."
She tilted her head as if to inquire further. He pointed toward the rendezvous point where the other Mandalorians would be waiting. "I've decided that I will do right by my family now, because I know what happens when I try to do things alone."
"How did your mother die?" she asked. He never said it, but the sadness in his words made it obvious. "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to."
"I don't know," Alkor answered softly. "I never got to see her again."
Asha stared at the ground. "...I'm sorry," she said again. This time, she meant it from the bottom of her heart.
