Farmer's Markets & Chef's Salads (Fringe Dominion of Sump)

[rain21199]

Cain landed his ship on the soil. He was a little bit late to the party, but that was all right. Cain followed a set of tracks, and saw a man getting attacked by vegetables. It really was a sight. He walked up to the small group of people watching the specticle like nothing was going on. He looked towards the man getting bitten and asked "What's wrong with that guy?"

 

[Bourne Cavanagh]

Smoke came billowing from the Blazing Chain pirate's mouth as his upper lip gave a distinct unamused curl. Attack of the singing vegetables. His patience was coming to a near end.

Jerking the cig from his lips he sent a scattering of ash to the ground, while one rather excitable eggplant came at his direction. He didn't hesitate. A flick of the long trench coat he wore brought the sun's glint over the blaster holster on his hip. A smooth draw and the balanced weight of the weapon soon settled in his palm.

There was a flash of light as a green bolt of energy went smack dab in the middle of the excitable eggplant, sending a white frothy mess flying in a small circle on the ground with various wiggling white bits still jiggling in a steaming mess.

He was quiet, as his hazel eyes drew up to meet those of the party before him. He gave a shrug. "Hate critters."

 

[Kassandra Distorith]

"You...have got to be joking."

There were just no words that could possibly do this spectacle justice. It was barely possible to clamp down on the laughter that threatened, as sea-green eyes tracked the progress of various vegetables in their quest of vengeance. One arm wrapped around her middle, the other lifted a hand to cover her mouth, the smallest mirthful sound managing to escape. Her gaze went briefly to each member of their party, most of whom were in the same predicament she was, stunned at the spectacle.

Except for Sivas, who was, unfortunately, the target of some serious citric rage. He was, thankfully, at least able to deal with the grapefruit of doom, though there was a potato on an awning making a serious case for a headlining gig in a Casino on Coronet City's Treasure Ship Row. Sivas was down for the count regardless, with an infectious case of laughter, which elicited a giggle from the blonde soldier.

"Should have brought a greenputt club to this shindig, not a gun..." she said lightly, moving over to a small stall that had been overturned. Grabbing an abandoned shovel, Phedre eyed an incoming wave of enraged zucchini, and positioned herself for a shot.

"FORE!"

A well-timed swing launched several of the screaming squash into the side of one of the permanent structures, leaving a splatter of still wriggling innards and seeds. If she ever consumed a vegetable again, she mused, it would be too soon.

 

[Yasha Cadera]

"Aaaaahahahaha! Hahahaha! Heeeelp! AAAAUUGGH! Seriously dude, that stings!" I kick off a collage of citrus fruit and roll over, "Stop drop and roll! Stop, drop and roll!" A cascade of salad vegetables are smacking against my rolling body, there are muffles, wumps, and cackles. The cackles are coming from me.

Out of the corner of my eye I see some Nuknogs running in circles slapping at the ground. One of the Nuknogs rushes [member="Rave Merrill"] & [member="Bourne Cavanagh"], little arms flailing side to side as a legion of roma tomatoes climb up its back and onto its shoulders. "No more plucking unripe fruit before its time! No more smelly garbage piles beside our communities! No more klutzy farmers stepping on zucchini flowers! We vegetables will claim this dirt sphere and fertilize it with your ruff age!" The lead tomato had somehow fashioned a tricorn hat out of blueberry leaves and a small yellow flower, it thumped up top of the Nuknog's head and plunked down on the unfortunate alien's dome. The tomato legion gummed at the Nuknog's muscles and lo and behold!

The Nuknog, much to its own groans of protest, began to move in odd directions! The vegetables were taking control of the Nuknogs!

[member="Cain Laatl"]'s question hit the air and my giggles burst out even louder. "All I wanted was a picnic dude! A picnic! I'm so freaking hungry I c-ooooooh you know what's wrong with me, Cain? I'm a vegetarian!" Reaching forward, I grab a head of lettuce (which had taken up purchase on my ribcage).

"Oh! Oh! Oh no! A vegetarian! SOMEBODY SAVE ME! No! N-Aaauuuggh!" the lettuce screams as my teeth sink into its green leaves.

"Tasty!" The vegetables around me have begun to flail their little floral bodies, hopping away from the suddenly scary vegetarian. "Quick, everyone start eating! @Alen Navarro, are you ok buddy?"

[member="D-Man"]'s carver of the vegetable matter was attracting stronger vegetables. Tubers like potato and turnip and yam were beginning to crowd him, as salad bits fell to the ground with soft thumps. One of the Nuknogs raced over to [member="Gavin Ovmar"] and the others, "We'll do anything! Anything! We'll eat nothing but meat and cheese, save us from … from… the farmer!"

OOC: I'm getting back in the swing after having been in Africa, sorry for the quality it'll go up as I get my head in it! ~ Lizzy

 

[Marcus Tritum]

You have got to be kriffing me. Talking vegetables. What the hell kind of planet is this?!

I dragged my gigantor-knife from its sheath and snatched impervi-hatchet from the belt loop. For some reason having sharp-edged weapons in each hand made me feel way more comfortable about this whole thing. I waded into the.... vegetables, swinging my hatchet to and fro like one of Zaiden's eyestalks. Tomato juice spattered against my coat. Cleaved cabbages flew through the air.

My eyes turned to Anders, who stood surround in a pile of the freakin' lettuce lords. I followed his lead and grabbed up a head of cabbage and took a gnarly bite out of it. I stared down a charging eggplant. It skidded to a halt at the death of its comrade, shrieking in terror.

 

[Yasha Cadera]

I shove off from the vegetable matter twisted and fallow around me and hoof it to [member="Dak Canton"] and shove my back against his. The tubers are coming fast, they're using spring pea sprouts as catapults and I cannot believe that Sump has changed so much. . . "Someone has got to explain what's happening here. What kind of fertilizer were the Nuknogs using!?"

I kick an eggplant crusader and it flies through the air into a huddling group of Nuknogs. They scatter screaming wildly, arms flailing in the breezy wind. "Whose the biggest farmer in the area!?"

One of the Nuknogs screams into Dak and I and throws himself at our feet. "The biggest farmer in town! He's.. . Sved Ish Kooke!"

You have got to be decking me.

 

[Lucianus Adair]

At all this... insanity, Adair could do little more than roll his eyes - in a nonliteral, inward sense - and cleave through vegetable after vegetable, but they just kept coming. He made his way over to [member="Anders Sivas"] and [member="Dak Canton"], looking down at the Nuknog at the feet of his two allies, a scowl on his face. This absurdity was... absurd. The half-K'paur put up a barrier around himself, Sivas, Canton, and the nameless Nuknog to fend off much of the aerial vegetabular assault for a time, fixing his pale eyes on the Nuknog.

"Where?" The question came in an annoyed growl, more of a demand than anything else. "In which direction might we find this... Sved Ish Kooke? Tell me."

He was going to want a nice, bloody piece of meat after this.

 

[Dissero]

With a woosh and a roar of engines, The Magnum Opus soared in overhead still steaming from its atmospheric entrance. Unusual for such a large sort of ship to make such an intimate landing, but with these wide open spaces and it's current stock of inhabitants. Pulling to hover a few feet off the ground, it's cargo bay ramp lowered to reveal a menagerie of nerf, woolly pigs, various large quadrupedal herbivores, and a chagrined Master Archivist.

I'll give you a moment.

For those of the Fringe who knew the man, they might be aware that he had no skill with animals, but if anyone had access to things that might be of use in this particular instance, it was him. It so happened he did - it was called the Fauna Staff. He had in his hand the strange thing carved from wood and inscribed with runes and symbols. At the top was an aged focusing crystal. It offered Force users of power and will a means of controlling soft-minded creatures. He'd found it buried within a collection of weapons from the Sith Empire's Vaults a few months ago and decided this was a good time to give it a whirl.

Dissero whirled the staff.

"Go," he said, pointing it towards the group of Fringers and their high-fiber assailants, "feast."

The resulting grunts and squeels sounded enthused as the horde of animals eagerly, and hungrily, piled off the cargo ramp.

Taking a moment to grimace at the stench, the grandest Nerf Herder in a century casually strolled off the ramp and landed in knee-deep muck, "Oh hell."

 

[Lucien Cordel]

Lucien shook his head. You knew a planet had problems when even the vegetables rebelled "this is what happens when one allows poor people to make key decisions" he announced prehaps to no one. He was notably displeased, he had come here to eat having cancelled at reservation at zaadja a finest restaurant ... The waiting list was 6 months long. He had been just about to organise an investigation when a pack of over zealous sweet corn had opened fire at him.

He had evaded them but was left with trivial cuts and in his rush for cover he had scraped his knee causing major damage to his trouser leg. It was time to launch a counter offensive he was just planing what to do when a baby water melon rushed past screaming for its mum. Lucien gently picked it up "dinner time" he smiled and took up a paring knife.