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Approved Planet Dromund Vatsu

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Darth Vyrassu

Immortal Jen'ari Sith Emperor
Images:
16c0zs9.jpg

^^Image source: http://nl.swtor.wikia.com/wiki/Dromund_Kaas

Be as descriptive and detailed as desired. Any information that does not fit a category can be added at the end.

Name: Dromund Vatsu

Region: Outer Rim Territories.

System: Uncharted and Un-named System

Suns: 1 sun called Dromund, Main Sequence stars is the type of stars in the system

Orbital Position: 6th planet in its system

Moons: 1 moon

System Features: Rumored this planet holds the secret Sith Imperial Armada Fleet from Darth Vyrassu's Jen'ari Empire.

Coordinates:
15z59wy.jpg


Rotational Period: 24 Galactic Standard Hours

Orbital Period: 316 Standard Days

Class: Terrestrial

Diameter: 22,450 Kilometers

Atmosphere: Type 1

Climate: The climate of the planet is in a constant state of Overcast. Dark gray clouds cover the sky from below, while those from space would see nothing but a swirling mass of storms. Electrical currents are always arching through the clouds, thunder booming as a result. Due to the constant state of storms upon the planet, it is not uncommon for the winds to whirl up into powerful storms without any warning. When the winds are not rampaging through the world, there is constantly a rough breeze blowing through the realms of the planet.

With the ever present storm clouds, rain is common upon the planet, and the inhabitants have learned to live with the rain that often falls. The air is rarely humid, as the storm clouds from above tend to suck the moisture from the air itself to constantly feed the growing storms. It is uncommon to see snow, and if it does snow, hail tends to follow suit.

Gravity: Standard

Primary Terrain:
* Swamps
*Jungles
*Oceans
*Mountain
*Icy mountain tops

Native Species:
FAUNA:
Jurgorans
Yozusks
Sleens
Vine cats
Swamp wampas
Mailocs

PEOPLE:
Humans


Immigrated Species:
Human
Sith
Zabrak


Primary Languages: Galactic Standard Basic

Government:
244 ABY: Jen'ari Empire
Currently: Theocratic


Population:
Before 244 ABY: 500,000
Current: 10 million

Demonym: Vatsuians


Major Imports: none as the planet has no interaction with the rest of the galaxy

Major Exports: providing the planet would interact with the galaxy, this is what it has to offer:
*Fruits & Vegetables
*Berries
*Grapes
*Tobacco
*Iron
*Random things explorers sell at pawn shops

Affiliation:
244 ABY: Jen'ari Empire
Current: Darth Vyrassu/One Sith




Major Locations:
*Darth Vyrassu's Hidden Citadel
When Darth Vyrassu was Sith Emperor for the Jen'ari Empire in 244 ABY He had his Empire's capital on Eclipse. But in secret Vyrassu had ordered the construction of a Secret Sith Citadel that only him and his dark council knew about. Once completed it was said that underground of this planet near the Citadel was Vyrassu's Hidden Sith Alchemy chambers. The Sith Citadel was never found by explorers or Jedi therefore it was ruled a myth, but others believe it exist as that's Where Vyrassu goes when he can't be found or if recovering power or doing experiments.

*Vatsu City
Vatsu city was a metropolitan city Vyrassu had made for the native humans of the planet after Vyrassu taught them many things about current culture. The city is self efficient surviving of the land by hunting for animals and growing fruits and vegetables for food. A treasury was constructed in the city that creates Vatsu credits the type of currency used on the planet. Although the planet has no interaction with the rest of the galaxy Vatsu city dies have a spaceport but it only holds speeders and various other types of vehicles for getting around the planet. Most of the people living in Vatsu city have actual jobs at various businesses throughout the city such as hotels, the black casino, City Hall, Vatsu Security Force Department (police), grocery stores, pawn shops and even The iron mill that focuses on miners going into caves around the planet mining iron for creating weapons, speeders, repairs to the city, amongst other things. There is even a library where on record it holds holobooks and holodisk of the planets history and in a restricted section that only authorized personal can get into it holds records of Darth Vyrassu's Jen'ari Empire.

*Various hidden caves
Most caves on Dromund Vatsu have small veins of iron ore in them. But there is as well a few caves undiscovered that could have a great many treasures.


Culture: In the distant past, Vyrassu led his Sith Forces to the planet of Dromund Vatsu. Upon arriving to the planet, the Sith Lord found it was inhabited by simple-minded natives. Seeing the potential of the planet, Vyrassu and his Sith forces overtook the planet in a brief war, which ended with the death of many inhabitants. Since then, the planet has slowly been molded and shaped by Vyrassu. The Natives and immigrants of Dromund Vatsu could usually find entertainment going to the black casino to partake in the various card games and slot machines, out even bet on the Swoop races. Gambling was a powerful entertainment that could either make or break a person. People could also partake in entering the Swoop Races. A sport that has proved very dangerous. Locals would even bet large dinners of money on thier favorite racer. Each year would boost a race event known as the Season, 8 months of racing every other week leading up to the final race of the season, The Swoop Championship where the betting would be big, high stakes were on the line. Aside from the gambling and sports people would enjoy finer things in life, such as fine restaurants, an art museum which held art submitted by natives and immigrants of the Planet. Was considered high class life style, people wearing fancy suits and robes with high paying jobs. But like all civilizations where there was high life there was the low life slums of scum and villainy, seedier parts of the city saw the homeless, robbers, thieves, crooks, a true low life of civilization.

As many centuries passed, a Cult was formed by the government worshipping Vyrassu as a god. The people are loyal to him and his followers, as he is their god, and his orders are divine and absolute.

Technology: Technology is about the same as the rest of the average technology in the galaxy.




History:

During the first Reign of Darth Vyrassu over the Jen'ari Empire, Vyrassu quickly begin looking for a new planet he could conquer and take full control of. Vyrassu dispatched several Imperial scouts all over the galaxy. After months one Imperial scout team reported back to finding a planet far out in the galaxy that would be perfect. Vyrassu took the coordinates and investigated the Planet. Vyrassu then ordered an invasion. Once the invasion was over Vyrassu promised the people a better life and a city of life. Thus Vyrassu had Built Vatsu City.

Notable PCs:
Darth Vyrassu

Intent: This planet is being made to further tell the story of Darth Vyrassu's past as well as a future story that could unfold into a dominion and a way that I have been working on regarding the One Sith.
 

Rusty

Purveyor of Fine Weaponry
Thanks for the submission. I do have a few questions and concerns:


  • Diameter is about twice that of Earth, but you’ve got standard gravity. This seems improbable. If you’d like standard gravity, I’d recommend cutting the diameter in half.

  • If we’re going by the mark on the map, the planet would be several lightyears from its home star. If it shares a star with Dromund Kaas, it should be much, much closer.

  • I’d like a little more detail on the climate. “Wet, heavily electrified” is rather nonspecific. We’ll need to know a lot more about that and why the planet is the way it is. “Forbidden Sith Magic” is simply not enough of an answer.

  • Populations seem awfully low. I can understand a hidden fortress world not having a whole lot in the way of immigration, but for there to only have been 20,000 natives suggests that they’re on the verge of dying out. That is an incredibly low number for a sentient species, regardless of how primitive they might be. Also, on the current Chaos timeline, over 600 years have passed since the last stated figure. How might that have changed from then to now?

  • There really needs to be more to the culture. How do the natives get along with the immigrants? How does the religious nature of the population affect things like art, or entertainment? There’s a lot of ground to cover here, and it will need to be addressed in greater depth.

  • If you killed off the scouts that found the place, how did anyone else find it to build a city? Why are there immigrants? Does no one else in the system possess a telescope? An entire planet is hard to miss, especially for a spacefaring civilization.

  • How did the 400 years of Darkness and the Gulag Plague affect the planet and its population?
  • Your stated purpose is to explore your character’s past, but it looks an awful lot like you’re trying to build a fortress world. While it wouldn’t be the first and probably won’t be the last, be advised that if your hidden fortress contains any powerful hidden secrets, you may be called upon to submit the location separately.

Thanks for your time, and I look forward to working with you to get this thing approved.

[member="Darth Vyrassu"]
 

Darth Vyrassu

Immortal Jen'ari Sith Emperor
Alright I will address those issues [member=rusty]

Although the diameter is not much bigger than Dromund Kaas and Dromund Kaas has standard gravity, so I don't see an issue there
 

Darth Vyrassu

Immortal Jen'ari Sith Emperor
I'll make the diameter same as Dromund Kaas then, also re-read I never said forbidden Sith magic is the cause, I said it was because it's so far from its sun it never gets warmth enough to have sunny days and the people who built it were the natives and the imperial troops of Vyrassu's Imperial Military, and the immigrant's are people from Vyrassu's Empire. [member=rusty]

Also, it's not hard to keep a planet a secret when your not exactly looking for it, they kept Dromund Kaas a secret for a thousand plus years
 

Rusty

Purveyor of Fine Weaponry
[member="Darth Vyrassu"]

Okay, let's address this one at a time.



Darth Vyrassu said:
also re-read I never said forbidden Sith magic is the cause, I said it was because it's so far from its sun it never gets warmth enough to have sunny days

Doesn't work like that. If you're that far away from the sun, there's not enough energy to vaporize water. You get a lot of ice, but not much rain. If there's some sort of mechanism heating the place, that needs to be listed.



Darth Vyrassu said:
and the people who built it were the natives and the imperial troops of Vyrassu's Imperial Military, and the immigrant's are people from Vyrassu's Empire.
That still doesn't answer the question: how? If you're the only one that knows where it is, do you personally fly every colony ship by yourself? That needs to be addressed, because it just doesn't make sense at is.



Darth Vyrassu said:
Also, it's not hard to keep a planet a secret when your not exactly looking for it, they kept Dromund Kaas a secret for a thousand plus years
Keeping an entire star system hidden is not that hard. Once you find the system, however, an entire unscouted planet presents a major hyperspatial navigation hazard, and it's not particularly small. If we could find Pluto in the 1920's, someone can find a planet twice the size of earth in Star Wars. If it's hidden, there needs to be a reason for it.
 

Darth Vyrassu

Immortal Jen'ari Sith Emperor
That still doesn't answer the question: how? If you're the only one that knows where it is, do you personally fly every colony ship by yourself? That needs to be addressed, because it just doesn't make sense at is.
Yeah it actually does, the imperial troops guard the Citadel so they live there, Vyrassu took them there and they never left.


Doesn't work like that. If you're that far away from the sun, there's not enough energy to vaporize water. You get a lot of ice, but not much rain. If there's some sort of mechanism heating the place, that needs to be listed.
Ok [member=rusty] I'll re word it and put the scientific reason it would rain so much.
 

Rusty

Purveyor of Fine Weaponry
[member="Darth Vyrassu"]

Darth Vyrassu said:
Yeah it actually does, the imperial troops guard the Citadel so they live there, Vyrassu took them there and they never left.

You said in your submission that you killed everyone who knew about how to find it, and that you were the only person left alive who knew the location. This does not account for the colonists, or anyone in system who might have a telescope, or a passing spaceship. This is a planet twice the size of earth. If the planet is hidden, you need a more solid reason than that.
 

Darth Vyrassu

Immortal Jen'ari Sith Emperor
FINE [member=rusty] I'll re word it to that only the natives, Vyrassu's Imperial troops and a handful of explorers and people wandering that far out in the galaxy for no apparent reason know of its location
 
[member="Darth Vyrassu"]
I will trouble you to be a little more respectful in dealing with my Judge.

His request was perfectly fair and legitimate, and we do not need any attitude for such a simple matter.

Now, back to you, [member="Rusty"]
 

Rusty

Purveyor of Fine Weaponry
Darth Vyrassu said:
Climate: Climate is constant overcast causing it to train constantly also producing electrical currents through the most air of the clouds causing thunder and lightning constantly as well
This sentence is not sufficient to describe the climate of an entire planet. Nor is it technically a sentence.



Darth Vyrassu said:
The only entertainment allowed on planet is those of Swoop racing and gambling as the religious cult government forbids slavery and exotic dancing.

I assume this is meant to address the issues originally mentioned with the culture section. It does not. Please refer to the original request for clarification. The culture of a single planet cannot be summed up in a single paragraph. We're not asking for a thesis, but you'll need to give us more than that.

You still have not addressed the issues with the population or how the planet was supposed to remain hidden in a busy star system, despite being unusually large in an unusual orbit, and no doubt emitting unusual amounts of electromagnetic energy in the from all the lightning and the radio waves.

You also have not addressed the events of the 400 Years of Darkness or the Gulag Plague.

[member="Darth Vyrassu"]
 

Darth Vyrassu

Immortal Jen'ari Sith Emperor
I have to fixed the population, and the 400 year darkness and the plague will not be answered as I have no idea what they are and when I looked it up I got you guys making jokes no serious definition of it. And as for the climate it seems no matter what I put your not going to accept it, it's constantly raining and thunder and lightning, what do you want? There is nothing else to say on it. And I thinkers I summed up the culture in entertainment in that paragraph, it's pretty obvious what the religious cult allows and don't.

Not trying to have an attitude but I'm starting to get annoyed, I fix the problems you asked and you still say they are an issue

[Member=rusty]
 

Rusty

Purveyor of Fine Weaponry
Your frustration is understandable; it is never easy to have to make changes to a submission.

If you are unclear as to what is expected, I invite you to peruse the Approved Planets thread (http://starwarsrp.net/forum/134-approved-planets/.) There you will find a more clear illustration of what is expected from a submission. The Timeline (http://starwarsrp.net/page/articles.html/_/timeline/) may be of some help in explaining the events that are expected to impact your planet.

As always, if you have any further questions concerning your submission, you are welcome to post them here.
 

Rusty

Purveyor of Fine Weaponry
That, my friend, is loads better. Two things, and then I think you should be good to go.



Darth Vyrassu said:
Gulag Plague the civilization of Dromund Kaas became fatally ill. Most were locked in quarantine while others were treated. After the Plague was over the civilization was cut down to nearly extinct. It took some time but the civilization was eventually able to recover and rebuild but it indeed took a while to rebuild and recover.

Throw in a line about the Netherworld event here. http://starwarsrp.net/page/articles.html/_/timeline/844-aby-netherworld-r33 Billions of folks upped and vanished, and while most of them came back, the effects have to be referenced.




Darth Vyrassu said:
The scouts reported this news and the coordinates to Vyrassu. Afterwards Vyrassu killed the scouts making him the only one with the known location of Dromund Vatsu.
This part is still problematic. If you make it a little more vague, something about how he tried to do everything in his power to keep the location hidden, but leave open the possibility of discovery, you should be okay. It's a busy system, so someone is bound to notice. Have a little fun and come up with a way to discourage people from paying attention.
 
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