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Codex Denied Darth Mephis' Mausoleum

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OUT OF CHARACTER INFORMATION
  • Intent: To create a terrifying tomb| nexus
  • Image Credit: [X]
  • Canon: N/A
  • Permissions: N/A
  • Links: [X] [X]
SETTING INFORMATION
  • Nexus Name: Titan's Tomb
  • Nexus Alignment: Dark
  • Location: [Eriadu]
  • Affiliation: Credius Nargath
  • Size: Medium
  • Strength: Strong
  • Accessibility:
    • Entrance through Valkan Citadel: As Darth Mephis was more commonly known as Arcosius Haephes Nargath, first lord of the house of Nargath, it would be no surprise that there ought to be an entrance to his mausoleum within the confines of the Palacecomplex in which House Nargath and its seat of power reside. Within the family graveyard, near the northern wing of the palace complex, seperated from most of the outside world, a somewhat cumbling, yet still impressively large shrine is believed to house the corpse of the forefather of the current head of the House Nargath. However, what seemed to have been lost in time, is the fact that the shrine adorned with a statue and build with the finest marbles, metals and gems of the time of the old lord's passing, was but a small outside part of the impressively large inner sanctum of the mausoleum, which has been dug out very deep underneath the mountain range against which the palacecomplex borders. Filled with various tricks, traps, riddles and rats, it is a very dangerous way to traverse through endless corriors and dungeonlike labyrinths to find the center of the mausoleum.
    • Descent through Agony: At the other side of the mountain range against which the palace complex of the House of Nargath borders, there is a large relief hewn out of the stone, depicting great victories of olden times, long forgotten by the current populace and even modern literature and historics would spend years debating what they truly depict. What is known though, is that the relief is in reality a massive door, which opens only at a very specific timeperiod, when all the planets within the Eriadu System Allign in their orbit around the Eriadu star, an occurance which only happens about once every hundred years, it is thought to be able to blot the entire area in utter darkness and this opens the door, which has a staircase so long and deep into the mountain, no one who has ever tried to go down there has ever been seen again, thus tales about the entrance vary wildly and there is no definitive answer to what one might encounter.
  • Description:
    • The Titan's Tomb: The Nexus itself is found within the heart of the massive mausoleum itself, a massive suspended globe within a hollowed out mountain, constructed out of the bones of an unknown, gigantic species adorned with various amulets and signs of sith alchemy and sith sorcery. It's fossilized and clad hands grip at the metal on it's abdomen, allowing entrance to the innards of the giant orb, where one can find themselves standing in a large dome of shiny, slick and strangely liguid-like metal adorned with sith alchemical symbols and imbued with powerful sith sorcery.
    • The Mausoleum Dungeon: A literal labyrinth of corridors, large chambers and strange halls, filled with hundreds, if not thousands of traps and puzzles designed mainly for those who are of Lightside disposition to remain away from the very center. Most of the corridors depict various sith legends and lore in relief along the walls, some of the chambers allegedly are filled with treasure and hoards of tomes beyond compare,
NEXUS EFFECTS
The effects of the nexus heavily depend on the very application of the force through which the person or people entering the Mausoleum express themselves. As the very nature of the nexus is rather artificial, a result of a large conglomeration and concentration of sith alchemy and sith sorcery, the nexus is drenched with darkside energy, with there being rather special terms to the effects of the nexus.
  • Lightside Users, force sensitives and non force users: Due to the darkside nature of this mausoleum and nexus in general, the closer someone following the teachings of the jedi or foremost expressing themselves through the light side of the force may feel an uneasiness at first, this can eventually even turn into outright fear and despair the closer they reach to the very center, the core of the nexus. Aided greatly by the traps and puzzles which in themselves are quite terrifying and built mainly for lightside users. It may and can most likely end up with those of the light side either going completely insane, wandering the very halls and corridors of the labyrinth endlessly until death or simply lead them to tuck tail and run.
  • Darkside Users: Though darkside users are less likely to fall victim to the very darkness within the labyrinthal mausoleum, those of weak disposition and inate cowardly nature will feel effects similar to the lightside users. However, those already strong in the darkside, with strong will and passion, will only feel emboldened and will feel their senses to be more accute and accurate, allowing for many if not all of the traps to be easily avoided, though they must still traverse the labyrinth itself, which in itself is still not an easy feat.
  • The Titan's Tomb: Within the Titan's Tomb, the aforementioned massive core of the mausoleum and the factual center of the nexus itself, where all the darkness within the force is collected and concentrated through the use of sith sorcery and sith alchemy, those who are strong within the darkside of the force can revitalize themselvs through meditation, strengthen themselves and even strengthen the power of foresight and farsight, allowing them to pierce through the veil of time thanks to the massive concentration within the force. However, to reach this point, one must face the final test, the final trap of the tomb, which is to face the embodiment of your worst fear through a construct within the force. A literal form of the sith code line "breaking the chains" which by no means can be seen as an easy feat.
  • The Vele Jivanikas jewel: Though this is also possible with other artifacts and holocrons containing either the essence or the actual spirit within the force of a person, the Vele Jivanikas jewel is unique in the fact that it contains hundreds, if not thousands of force ghosts and spirits fed to or consumed by the jewel itself over the milenia of its existence. Within the inner sanctum of the Titan's tomb, one can through the force experience specific moments in time of the force ghost or essence within their possession. they will pass the veil of time in the form of a spectre, a force ghost themselves, limiting their interaction mainly to watching and observing the events of the past, though some truly strong within the force may in fact truly interact with others, though this is so unheard of and so rare that there is no recorded evidence of this ver even happening, what IS possible though, is to interact with other time anomalies or displacements in time.

POINTS OF INTEREST
  • Mountainside bas-relief: A massive, 500m high and 500m wide relif hewn out of a mountainside, depicting some ancient battle one is hard pressed to find in any of the current history books. Some say it is a depiction of times even before the infinite empire, of which itself not much is known. It is also rumored to be a door into the dark depths of the mountain, where according to some myths and legends, one can find hoards of treasure and tomes of knowledge, but only a few testimonies of the relief being a door have ever been discovered and details on how or when it opens are few and far between.
  • Arcossius Nargath Gravesite: Near the northern wing of the Nargath palacecomplex, there is a large statue and a medium sized shrine of old architecture and in a somewhat sorry state due to being over a few milenia old, it is rumoured to possess the second entry to the labyrinthian dungeon underneath the mountain where the true grave of the forefather of the House Nargath has been laid to rest.
  • Titan's Tomb: A massive, spherical object laden with auridium, electrum, phrik and even beskar, a testament of wealth and power, it encompasses a fused in skeleton of some sort of gigantic humanoid being, which is also covered in precious metals and materials, with various massive pipes and tubes connecting to the sphere itself. This place houses on the outside, at the center of a large open area, the actual grave of the mighty Arcosius Nargath, while within the titanic being itself, there is a chamber which is said to be the very center or core for the nexus itself, a place of unbridled power and knowledge, but with hidden dangers and dreadful visions.

HISTORICAL INFORMATION
The origin of the Mausoleum which is many milenia old is...questionable and hotly debated among scholar, with the majority even denouncing its existance outright. However, family records of the House Nargath that have managed to withstand the test of time do mention this:

"Upon the unexpected death of the great lord of the house nargath, first of his kind, first of his name and first of his blood, the preparations to a tomb of his own design were made...Thousands worked days on end, months on end, but were never seen again...visitors from other worlds dressed in black and red robes, some with red skin as red as the crimson sky at dawn, others of races unknown...none returned, but after time...silent and eerie is all that can be said, none dear to approach, not even the grandson of Arcosius dares approach the place, for it is madness to ever go beyond the treshhold that is the mountain."
What can be gathered from the texts and rare accounts that can be found of the timeperiod around its construction, it that shiploads of auridium, electrum, phrik, doonium, kyber crystals and more were being transported to the mountainside and used for things people at the time did not seem to have any concept of. Thousands of laborers apparently vanished over time, with various strange figures arriving and assisting with the work, though also vanishing over time. The work on the massive tomb itself is said to have been spanning such a long time that by the time it was thought to be finished, Arcosius' grandchild was already the ruler of the House Nargath for two decades at the very least.

With so many people vanishing, it is rumoured to be not just a monumental gravesite for one person, but a mass grave, strengthened with the lifeforce, fear and despair of all who have died in the process of its creation, amplified by foul and unnatural practices and rituals so perverse and degraded that even sith of today would feel hesitation towards undertaking such unspeakable acts and projects.

Due to local superstition and folklore, people forbade all to try and find entrance to the tomb and as time went by, the rumours and the inclination to raid the tomb died out, history forgotten and time passing by. It wasn't until the clonewars that an apparent discovery had been made, when a platoon of clones alonside their jedi commander vanished for three weeks on end when they went into the mountainrange to scout for enemy troops, only to have the jedi and about a tenth of his platoon return in a state of madness, consumed by fear and despair, unable to even state any coherent sentence. A small group of jedi tried to figure out what had happened a few weeks later, but no evidence of any evil plot or influence could be found and the rumours were yet again laid to rest.

During the Galactic Empire it was rumoured even emperor Palpatine himself took interest to the whereabouts of this tomb, but the first to actually start researching it was the One sith Krait, yet alas even he had no success in uncovering the ways to enter it, though he did surmise with the help of the House Nargath at the time that perhaps a way to get into the tomb could be found through the dilapitated shrine in the graveyard at the north of the palacecomplex which was home to the illustrious house and its original forefather.

So far no revelations have yielded any extra information on how to enter the tomb or the dungeons, but within the inner circles of the house, the legends remained and there were always those strong in the force who could feel the calling from the mountainrange, who knew that the cold in the mountains was not just from altitude, but also caused by something far more sinister than a bit of snow and thin air...
 
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Zak Dymo

Guest
Z
Credius Credius

I will be doing this review for you. This is a solid submission overall, my only area of concern is with the Nexus Effects. So the below comments will be with regard to that section exclusively.

Before we begin, I want to cite the specific rule that applies: Language that could be interpreted to force another player to do something they do not wish for their character is prohibited.

Lightside Users, force sensitives and non force users: Due to the darkside nature of this mausoleum and nexus in general, the closer someone following the teachings of the jedi or foremost expressing themselves through the light side of the force will feel an uneasiness at first, with this turning into outright fear and despair the closer they reach to the very center, the core of the nexus. Aided greatly by the traps and puzzles which in themselves are terrifying mainly for lightside users. It may and can most likely end up with those of the light side either going completely insane, wandering the very halls and corridors of the labyrinth endlessly until death or simply force them to tuck tail and run.
Darkside Users: Though darkside users are less likely to fall victim to the very darkness within the labyrinthal mausoleum, those of weak disposition and inate cowardly nature will feel effects similar to the lightside users. However, those already strong in the darkside, with strong will and passion, will only feel emboldened and will feel their senses to be more accute and accurate, allowing for many if not all of the traps to be easily avoided, though they must still traverse the labyrinth itself, which in itself is still not an easy feat.

While the majority of this section is fine, the highlighted represents use of definitive language that needs to be toned down to allow writers to respond as they desire. An example might be using "may feel" as opposed to "will feel".

Those are my comments. I look forward to yours in reply. Please tag me when you have completed any edits.
 
Zak Dymo

Adjusted the first mention to indeed "may feel". Your second example is however faulty as it is the extension of a sentence which obviously starts with they "may and "can" end up in one of the following results.

Both other examples are indeed absolute, but leave the freedom of Roleplaying intact, with the choice up to the writer themselves, as the results depend on wether or not their character is of a cowardly nature or not or of strong will or not. When removing any and all absolutes from a write up, certainly in cases like these, you are most likely to get the end result of no one actually making a choice and simply going for the 100% successrate without any input by the sub or intention of the location. Thus I wonder if it may be possible to request the second part to be dismissed or discussed for further possibilities or opinions.
 

Zak Dymo

Guest
Z
Credius Credius

Thank you for those edits. I think the lightside section's rewording removes any concerns that I had there, and because of the connective language between that section and the next, I think both are good to go now.

When removing any and all absolutes from a write up, certainly in cases like these, you are most likely to get the end result of no one actually making a choice and simply going for the 100% successrate without any input by the sub or intention of the location. Thus I wonder if it may be possible to request the second part to be dismissed or discussed for further possibilities or opinions.

I understand your concern, but ultimately the rules go toward idea that the writer of any given character has absolute control over their character in any environment. You and I can shape the environment or the setting, but how that environment or the setting is perceived or reacted upon by any particular character is the decision of that writer, rather than the location creator. Again, that's because the rule that submissions operate under is "Language that could be interpreted to force another player to do something they do not wish for their character is prohibited." So when I'm judging a submission, the exact wording or phrasing is always weighed in light of how the reader (rather than the submitter) would understand the location.

With the tweaks that you've made to the Nexus Effects, I'm happy to approve this in its current form. However, in light of the discussion, I feel obligated to ask if you're satisfied with the current state of the submission or whether there are any further changes that you want to make. You may also seek a Second Chance for this submission if you feel I am applying the rule incorrectly in this case.

Just let me know your thoughts/desires on those points.
 
Submission Name: Valkan Citadel
Link to Submission: https://www.starwarsrp.net/threads/house-nargath-palace-complex-valkan-citadel.129940/
Reason for Archival: no longer applicable to this character or the faction its located in

Submission Name: Valkan guards
Link to Submission: https://www.starwarsrp.net/threads/valkan-guard.130782/
Reason for Archival: no longer applicable to this character or the faction its located in

Submission Name: Kredius
Link to Submission: https://www.starwarsrp.net/threads/kredius.135152/#post-1885958
Reason for Archival: no longer applicable to this character or the faction its located in

Submission Name: Eriadu Planetary system
Link to Submission: https://www.starwarsrp.net/threads/eriadu-system.134245/#post-1879137
Reason for Archival: no longer applicable to this character or the faction its located in

Submission Name: Darth mephis' Mausoleum
Link to Submission: https://www.starwarsrp.net/threads/darth-mephis-mausoleum.136035/
Reason for Archival: no longer applicable to this character or the faction its located in

Submission Name: N&Z alpha site
Link to Submission: https://www.starwarsrp.net/threads/n-z-alpha-site-reasearch-and-development.136079/
Reason for Archival: no longer applicable to this character or the faction its located in
 
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