Death Cab for Cutie - Transatlanticism
This album tells a story, a real story. A story of tears and hurt. I remember I was a freshman going into high school and I looked so young, like It was a problem in middle school but people weren't so judgmental then. I mean, no one bullied me really. I just got looks and even now, as I go into music college I still get mistaken for a sophomore or junior in high school. I mean, it's okay now I got over it long ago.
Anyways, I was short and had a baby face and I was often an idiot and when people 'made fun' of me it was okay because I encouraged it. Like it didn't really bother me right? Anyways, I remember halfway through my freshman year I started liking this girl, she was like a acquaintance to me, calling her a friend might have been a stretch but not far. It's always that isn't it...love. Or at least the idea of it.
She was beautiful, beyond the realm of possibility in my eyes. However much my good friend tried to sway me, I eventually told her my feelings. She was in a relationship, which I knew about, but to my utmost surprise she said that it was falling apart and she wouldn't mind trying to go to the dance together, or whatever. As a freshman kid I was overjoyed, naive, but happy. Obviously this should have been sign one.
So I go home and to celebrate I am listening to the band I liked. Postal service. I was playing some piano by ear when it played the next song and it was by this band called death cab for cutie. What even? I thought.
What kind of name is that...
I listened to all of their music within the next day or two.
The album Transatlanticism was my favorite, I didn't make much of it though.
Still to this day, Death Cab is one of my favorite bands. Anyways, the 'dance' came up and she was there, for me. I took her and the whole time I was a mess, see I was new to this relationship thing. We were having a good time, my big crush and I. We even danced to a few songs which is rare for me, I don't dance much. The dj guy asked us if we wanted to recommend a song, I was like. Yeah, you know why not.
I was sweating and nervous as hell but I was still having a good time. My date had left by now but that was okay- I figured she was off getting a drink or something. I remembered this song, it was the same name of the album. Transatlanticism.
Man, this song. I had asked the guy to play it. Eventually he got to my request and since it's a slow song everyone started, well slow dancing. I went to find the girl and as I turned my head I saw her dancing with another guy. Right. I mean, come on for a freshman I was pretty sad. So...I started crying. I know, I know. She noticed as did about everyone, and while my song played she said "Maybe you should have dated someone who looked 12 too" And she pointed to my best friend, she was the one who tried to sway me away. This hurt me a lot. I called my mom and I cried the whole way home.
This is not where me story with Transatlanticism ends, that would be a pretty shabby story.
Give it about three months, I'm on instagram rping in a group called instaleague and I rp as a character called Mon-El.
This is mon-el. ^^
Of course the rp was terrible back then, oh it was so bad.
At least it was for me as you can see in these images:
While rping here, I actually started my journey to this site. That is another story though.
So being apart of this universe actually introduced me to a huntress roleplayer. I decided to kik her (messaging) to see if she wanted to rp.
And, I mean, she was just perfect to me. Everything she sent to me was perfect. Long replies, engaging conversation and just all around amazing. Little did I know this girl would become my girlfriend for the next three years of my life.
Anyways, we talked for 3 months before she exchanged personal information with me, but when I saw her. My god, she was so beautiful It took my breath away. Of course, I couldn't tell her. But I wanted to so bad. So given 3 weeks, I decided to ask her out...before even video chatting. Maybe a silly mistake but I did it. She said she had to think about it and those 3 or 4 hours were the hardest most tense hours of my life. I was literally laying on the floor the entire time thinking of every possible outcome. I think, this was the first time I felt true attraction. Given a few hours though,
she said yes.
She said to me that she wanted me to prove this could work. Thus I went on my journey of finding out how to make long distance work. I don't want to give out her real name, so lets just call her 'Katie'.
So I decided I was going to skype her. I messaged her a few days before and we both made skypes. It was sunday when we were supposed to skype. Imagine how nervous it would be, meeting and exchanging words with your partner for the first time ever, even though you had already been dating a few weeks. I knew this could break or make a relationship so I dressed up and made notes on paper. I know, what even is that idea.
With my shaking finger I called her, it was dark out and while it rang I positioned the note to cover my face so she couldn't see me. Her first words were "Come on silly, let me see that face." I mean, her voice was so perfect too. So I lowered the notes to show my face.
That skype call lasted 12 hours and went all through the night. Skype calls became a regular thing.
and...
I can genuinely say that I loved her after that. Or at least I knew she was worth it.
'Katie' and I kept dating as a happy couple and I kept hating school life but to tell you the truth, with her it didn't matter. When you're in love I think everything is better.
Eventually we were choosing songs that make us think of one another. For me she chose All of me. A song I cannot hear without getting emotional. I chose the song that broke my heart the last year, but I thought it was fitting. Transatlanticism. Additionally the lyrics say "I want you so much closer" Which was very true.
Give us time, we started sharing mail and I 'd male her a top of mine, vice versa. We even kept a journal together that I still have. The idea was one partner would write in the journal every week and then the other the next week. It was a nice way to feel closer.
Eventually, we were closer. Very much so. A few thousand miles so.
Finally, I held her in my arms.
The first night, after I had my
first kiss in the airport, I remember listening to Death Cabs Transatlanticism in my headphones while we cuddled and watched avengers together on her couch.
Back home, it's 2015 and we've been dating two years. Our two year anniversary was when things went down hill. To be blunt.
Give it until 2016, and by January she had cheated on me. I mean, I understand and I forgave her for it after I broke up with her. I switched schools soon after, which was hard for me senior year. I left all my friends and I remember listening to Transatlanticism over and over as I cried. I mean, two years was a long, long time. For me at least. I watched as she dated another guy and this school was bad and I thought everyone hated me. It's death cab and band that got me out of this. I remember band, something I had never been in as it wasn't offered at my old school, it seriously changed my life. Helped me move on and stuff. And here I am now, soon to be starting my music comp and performance majors after this internship. Obviously I left out a lot, like the fact that she cheated on me with one of our best friends. He was there, I wasn't.
I'm sorry for going off, I didn't expect to go on like this but memories are memories right? It's just, I love this album. And specifically the song.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-3b6hDCIeDk
ALSO - if you listen to any of these and like them, shoot me a PM or hit me up on Skype. I'd love to hear about it.
