Star Wars Roleplay: Chaos

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Approved Location The Asop force temple

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OUT OF CHARACTER INFORMATION

SETTING INFORMATION
  • Structure Name: Asop Ruins
  • Classification: Tomb
  • Location: Asop
  • Affiliation: Meran Mechanics / Open to explorers
  • Accessibility: Fairly remote; access can only be granted by the Meran clan due to the high risks involved.
  • Security: Most security is natural as the planet has a ethanol atmosphere and chemical alcohol oceans. the site itself has still active ancient security countermeasures, mummies, turrets etc.
  • Description: A long lost and recently found ancient tomb / temple of force worshipers. The temple has 10 levels each with vastly differing terrains from a lake, to a grave, to a grand throne room. It is huge with 100 meter high ceilings inside each floor. The only habitable rooms are in ruins with broken pillars.


POINTS OF INTEREST
  • 1 2 and 3 are all a dungeon intended to ward off intruders and cater to those of the darkside. Reaching the end leads to a door activated by a force push.
  • 4 is the lake. It's a large pool of cold water cycled by ancient pipes still running. There is no life in the pool. In the past there may have been life in the lake.
  • 5 is the tundra. A large frozen freezer intended to fend off intruders. There have been dead wampas discovered here recently.
  • 6 is the jungle. Strangely the jungle was a serene still living forest with a few insect life forms and plants.
  • There is a tower in the center of the forest leading down to:
  • 7 is the furnace - A lava field powered by the natural geo thermal heat of Asop's magma. Thankfully the tower from floor 6 leads to 8
  • 8 is the wasteland. Strangely this dry dusty empty room simply makes living space.
  • 9 is the temple proper. The temple is still fully operational it is glamorous and grand, this is simply a living and teaching center.
  • 10 the force church. This is a giant cathedral full of items relating to force artefacts, holocrons etc.


HISTORICAL INFORMATION
At the dawn of the galaxy the species that occupied the Asol system appear to have set up a temple to worship the force. The temple appeared to remain active till the world was destroyed. As the world Vito was destroyed the temple died off remaining lost for centuries as the galaxy entered the old republic era. The temple remained lost as the system became a fighting ground and dumping ground. As the system became a dump the temple lay dormant as the clone wars came and went and as the battle of Yavin happened.

Only recently it has been rediscovered.


The temple was recently discovered by the Meran Clan on it's claimed planet of Asop and then claimed under the galactically acknowledged law of finders keepers. Currently only a few floors have been explored, allowing for further exploration.
 
[member="Kami Meran"]

I see nothing wrong about this submission, but I feel it lacks in content. Here's a few prompts that could stir creativity:
  • Tell me a little more about each of the 10 levels.
  • How exactly does the Meran Clan have access to the facility?
  • It's a tomb; any underground ruins or whatnot?
Just give me a bit more in terms of content and quality, and I'll stamp this right away.

Tag me when you're done.
 
[member="Kami Meran"]

There's a heap of grammar and formatting issues in this submission. I don't normally tend to gripe about stuff like that, but readability is a huge part of being able to allow other roleplayers to interact with submissions in an RP setting. I would highly recommend and appreciate brushing up and cleaning this submission up.

With your permission, I can also lend a hand in cleaning this up.

Tag me when you're done.
 
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