Rather than let Isolda spend the night in her cramped starfighter, Starlin offered her shelter aboard the Bright Knight. She accepted, if only for the promise of a hot meal and a shower. For his part Starlin was glad to put off the inevitable epilogue when they would go their separate ways. He wanted to keep Isolda close for a little while longer.
Physically exhausted but mentally wide awake, he never went to bed. After bidding Kyla and Lara good night, he remained seated at the table in the rec room with his datapad in front of him. He was in the middle of the second paragraph of his mission report when Isolda appeared from the hallway, wearing plain gray pajamas.
"Hello," she greeted him shyly. "I can't sleep."
"Me neither," he said. "Can I get you anything?"
She hesitated, then answered, "A glass of water would be nice."
Standing up, Starlin grabbed a cup from a cabinet, placed it inside the drink dispenser and pressed the button. While the water poured, he tried to figure out what to say. He wanted to talk to her very badly, but he didn't know where to start. "So... What are you going to do next?" he finally asked.
"I don't know," she replied, shrugging. "Wherever the Ashla leads me."
"You know, you could ride with us for a little while," he suggested, hoping that she wouldn't see it for what it was: a desperate attempt to get her to stay. "We're always up to something."
"That is very kind of you. But I have my disagreements with the Jedi Order, and would not feel comfortable operating on one of their vessels."
"Oh, the Bright Knight isn't a Jedi ship," he insisted. "It's my own private, uh, personal vessel."
Isolda's gaze was unreadable as she looked at him. "Are you not a Jedi Master?" she said, her tone suggesting it was a statement of fact rather than a question.
Starlin's shoulders sagged. "Never mind," he mumbled, handing her the filled glass of water.
Isolda accepted the water and took a sip. "Part of me feels like Kai did all the work on Chaldea. He's at least deserving of a mention in your report."
"I dunno how well a Sithspawn saving the day would go over with the Jedi Masters." Starlin glanced up at Isolda as a new thought occurred to him. "Did you know that Kai was a Sithspawn?" She wouldn't have been able to sense his aura, being deprived of the Force.
"I believe he mentioned it, yes."
"And did that fact not... bother you, at all?" By all accounts, it should have been a non-negotiable for her. The Ashlan Crusaders were known to be so harsh in their judgment of Dark Siders that they crucified anyone remotely connected to the Sith. The Isolda he knew was no different. It was one of the reasons why they couldn't be together. No amount of attraction could cover up the fact that she was intolerant even of those whose circumstances were beyond their control.
"He saved the lives of your students and killed the witch," Isolda replied. "Though his flesh was damned, he proved by his actions that his spirit walked with Ashla."
Starlin stared at her in wonderment. "So it didn't bother you?"
"I wouldn't say that." She seemed to grow tense under his scrutiny, putting her cup down on the island countertop. "He wanted to redeem himself. If he hadn't, that would be another story. I will not enable someone to continue in defiance of the Ashla."
"I met him when he was at his lowest point," Starlin muttered. "An addict who attacked his own friend. He went to Azrael for his mistakes."
Her eyes narrowed. "I wouldn't call choosing to stay in a Sithspawn body a mistake. Even he admitted such."
"How about crucifying civilians because they dared to live under Sith occupation, rather than committing mass suicide for honor's sake?" Starlin shot back. "Would you call that a mistake?"
Isolda's jaw clenched. "Do you know what your problem is, Starlin? You're too loyal to people. You make excuses for them even when they do unforgivable things. It was the same way with your old master, that fire witch—"
"Syd," Starlin interrupted, bristling. "Her name was Syd Celsius, and I'd advise you not to speak ill of the dead."
Isolda let out an angry huff, but didn't say anything else. In the silence that followed, Starlin had time to regret his words. "I'm sorry," he said. "You're right. I am loyal to a fault."
Her lower lip quivered, then her expression crumpled, and for a moment she looked like she was on the verge of tears. "No, Starlin. I'm the one who should apologize."
"It's okay." He gave her a small smile. "You're lucky, you know. You put your faith in a perfect deity. The Ashla is never wrong. Put your faith in a person, and it's only a matter of time before they reveal their flaws and shortcomings. But hey—they're just people like me. Pathetic, selfish, miserable little beings are we."
"You're not pathetic," Isolda said. "You're human, and so am I."
The steel conviction in her voice sent a shiver down his spine. He almost couldn't believe what he was hearing. Starlin was self-deprecating by nature, but Isolda of Ession? She had always been proud. Yet here she was, showing humility and self-awareness for the first time since he had met her.
"You think my faith in the Ashla is perfect? You think I don't ever have doubts?" she continued, standing strong even as tears began to fill her eyes. "The ideals I was taught didn't stand up against the realities I faced out in the galaxy. I was supposed to kill for the Ashla, but the people I saw on the crosses were just like me. I wasn't supposed to love anyone who wasn't an Ashlan, but Starlin, I love you. I still love you."
He started to reach for her, slow and cautious, afraid he might scare her off. But she practically threw herself into his arms, holding him tight as she buried her face in his neck.
"Why did we do this to ourselves, Isolda?" he whispered. "Hold ourselves to these impossible standards. Why wasn't it ever enough?"
"I don't know anymore. We must not have known any better." She pulled back. “Let's not make the same mistake again. I'll forgive you, if you forgive me.”
It was like the embers of a dying fire were rekindled in him. Starlin let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. "I forgive you," he said, then whispered, "I love you."
It was hard to tell who kissed who first. He only knew that her lips were soft and her breath was hot as she eagerly opened her mouth against his, hungry for what they had denied themselves for so many years. It was Starlin who broke the kiss at last, pressing his cheek to her brow as he caught his breath. "Are you sure this is what you want?" he gasped, terrified and exhilarated and wanting more than anything to hear her say it.
"Starlin Rand, I want to marry you," she replied, her voice husky and irresistible. "Do you accept?"
His panting gave way to giddy laughter. He stroked her long hair, grinning from ear to ear as he gazed lovingly into her eyes. "Yeah. Let's do it." Before he could second-guess himself, he kissed her again.