Do It

[Soliath Devin Talith]

Critique me, my characters, my factory submission, my codex submissions, my actions as a Faction Leader.

Genuinely do so. Don't care what, but don't placate me. Do not post jokes or funny ratings, offer me genuine critique on my characters, writing, etc...

Of course, that's not to say come in here and be a jerk, you get my meaning. Do what this Subforum is made for and offer me constructive criticism.

 

[Darth Carnifex]

I really don't have much to say.

We haven't RP'd for a very long time, but I've always enjoyed your characters, especially Moridin. He served as an inspiration for how I would mold Kaine into the character he is today. I do personally dislike that you have a tendency to throw away characters and make new ones constantly, but that's more of a personal grievance than anything.

 

[Sabena Shai]

I think it would be cool if you hid your characters' thoughts more. Makes the mystique grow.

I like mystique.

 

[Hal Terrano]

[member="Soliael Devin Talith"]

Sometimes you take up too much space in bed.

 

[Soliath Devin Talith]

I think it would be cool if you hid your characters' thoughts more. Makes the mystique grow.

I like mystique.

I've actually tried to do this, but i don't pull it off very well.

I will try harder in the future as It's something I've always enjoyed in your characters.

[member="Soliael Devin Talith"]

Sometimes you take up too much space in bed.

Your lies are not welcome here.

 

[Boethiah]

[member="Soliael Devin Talith"]

You're not pretty enough.

 

[Soliath Devin Talith]

I did say no jokes.

Please honor that guys.

 

[Valiens Nantaris]

[member="Soliael Devin Talith"]
On a serious note, I find that your factory subs lack versatility. My opinion of the Immortal is well known, and I say that although I acknowledge what you’re trying to do there, I don’t think it’s a good submission.

Your writing though is very good. You create nicely portrayed characters, you’re reasonable when there’s a problem, and you’re wuick with your replies. Also, most importantly, you’re willing to kill off your characters when needed.

 

[Soliath Devin Talith]

On a serious note, I find that your factory subs lack versatility. My opinion of the Immortal is well known, and I say that although I acknowledge what you’re trying to do there, I don’t think it’s a good submission.

This is a critique i take to heart and have recently tried to change by creating more unique submissions. Specifically with my Biot Submissions.

I'll try to keep it in mind with future starship subs however

 

[Fatty]

I'm not sure how much of a constructive critique this is, but I absolutely adored your Tournament of the Cauldron. It's one of the more memorable experiences I had the pleasure of being a part of.

You seem like a sensible stand up guy, and I never bore of reading your entries.

However, I feel like you often go excessively into the "UNLIMITED POWAH!" zone of the force with your characters, though this is more of a Chaos Cultural thing rather than something specifically directed at you.

Also for whatever reason, that Factory sub you made a looooooooooooooong ass time ago of a huge energy station that eats an entire star cracked me up. I have no idea what it was for, but I remember that it contained something along the lines "It's powered by a karkin sun". Not sure if that was serious or not, but it has stuck with me, and I was just reminded of it by Val's critique on your "Immortal" thingy.

Anyway, I like you :3

 

[Boethiah]

My bad, It took me down to the part about the bed so I responded based off that. *Ahem*

If I might be honest.

Flaws

• You don't tag enough: I've missed posts directed at me simply because I wasn't tagged, not sure if you've done that with others but perhaps focus on tagging more often?
• You need more diversity: Maybe it's because I've only roleplayed with two of your characters but they're written very similarly. So I guess try to operate writing styles a bit differently. Even if it's just a change in font or colour, it gives a sense of character (pun intended).

Strengths:

• You write very well: I'm a bit jealous of this but you tend to be able to say enough in as few words as possible where I can only say what I want in too many words. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
• You're good with the factory: I've looked at some of your ships in the past for insight when I was first getting started out in the factory.

[member="Soliael Devin Talith"]

Again, my apologies for the joke

 

[Soliath Devin Talith]

Also for whatever reason, that Factory sub you made a looooooooooooooong ass time ago of a huge energy station that eats an entire star cracked me up. I have no idea what it was for, but I remember that it contained something along the lines "It's powered by a karkin sun". Not sure if that was serious or not, but it has stuck with me, and I was just reminded of it by Val's critique on your "Immortal" thingy.

It was a serious sub and was meant as the first stage of a micro-dyson sphere meant to provide clean renewable energy to the Sith Empire.

Thanks for the thoughts!

[member="Anja Aj'Rou"]

No problem it was a reminder, and thank you for your critique. I will work on my tagging, though i believe my characters are pretty diverse. You just haven't been introduced to all of them yet

Though i'll look into that too!

 

[Cira]

[member="Soliael Devin Talith"]

I love your chars when I interact with them.

But the constant desire to kill off characters you have makes me not want to rp with any of your other chars for fear I will get attached then wake up and they are dead. :/

 

[Jsc]

I've always thought it took balls to go off and create the Crusade Faction. In truth, I gave it two weeks. ...And yet everyday it remained, and gets better!, I think to myself: "Damn. Earned it."

I'd recommend you to anyone seeking a solid writing partner.

 

[Soliath Devin Talith]

[member="Cira"]

Having heard this twice now, and knowing its a complaint it is something i will work on. In the future, if my character has any relationship or attachments i will consult either everyone involved first. This is sort of a new resolution for me.

[member="Jay Scott Clark"]

Sadly, the crusade is now gone. We lasted an entire year and had some very good roleplays. Thank you for the compliment though

 

[Ellie Mors]

my characters

My only source of disdain for you is that every character you write dies when I meet them. I've avoided writing with you sort of because of that (and because I'm busy and suck at handling my time correctly, just ask everyone else I thread with) and because I'm still a teensy bit upset about Mierin.

 

[Soliath Devin Talith]

[member="Darth Vitium"]

Having received this complaint Three times now just in this thread, I'm aware just how huge a problem this is for many people. Again, I'll be consulting with everyone involved on future murdering of my Characters.

And i apologize about Mierin, there were many outside factors based on that and truthfully i have always felt i slighted you on the Master/Apprentice relationship.

 

[Eddie]

Well, I liked Moridin and the female version of him I saw, that killing of Teferi was badass and sad at the same time

 

[Soliath Devin Talith]

[member="Dresden Strife"]

Thank you.

 

[Ellie Mors]

And i apologize about Mierin, there were many outside factors based on that and truthfully i have always felt i slighted you on the Master/Apprentice relationship.

I guess I may have kind of worded that wrong: I'm not upset with you, I'm upset from an outside perspective looking in that I knew how it was going to end before it even began. I could deal with inheriting things, etc, from being your final apprentice - but it broke my heart (and I think I spammed enough gifs in your going away post to make that clear) that it was so very abrupt. Maybe I have a soft spot for bad endings. They're only one letter apart from sad ones anyways.