Dunames Lopez
Megalomaniac CEO of Star Tours
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In memory of the Reslian Purge, the Tunroth government has announced the construction of a dark-sided Force-nexus. The contract for the Force-nexus has been awarded by a consortium including Star Tours, as well as a group of private contractors. It is expected that the consortium delivers the dark-sided Force-nexus before Halloween for less than 1 million credits, and is expected to make a return on the investment within a few months of the Force-nexus opening. The Jiroch-Reslia Minister of Culture had the following statement to say about the decision of building the Force-nexus: "The decision to build the dark-sided Force-nexus comes after the realization that the most cost-effective way to attract tourists to Jiroch-Reslia is to build a horror-themed amusement park around the capital. Yet, the most cost-effective way to guarantee the psychological thrill rides of tourists' lifetimes is to build a dark-side nexus. We found that we had a foundation to build one: the massacre of Tunroth dark-siders in 10 BBY during the Reslian Purge" However, the First Order and the corresponding unit of dark-siders, the Knights of Ren, declined to comment.
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With the promise of a year-round Halloween for Jiroch-Reslia's residents, the Tunroth government on Jiroch-Reslia especially since Dunames flew one more flight of the with Darth Veles flying first class on the Moonlight Monument for free, alongside the other Sith hired to build the Force-nexus. Upon reading the contents of that TOoaST article, many passengers onboard were incredulous: they couldn't believe Star Tours would engage in such folly, even though said folly was rather low-cost. There was truly nothing too outlandish or morbid for Star Tours: not even that ski station on Hoth was morbid enough for her. Luckily she decided to keep to the same three or four expert-level trails as originally built and to cease expanding the resort along the slopes of Mount Ison: many customers have found they could go on just one of those trails before seeking heat indoors. Along with the Taking Off on a Star Tour article, she transmitted the following to all other interested dark-sided parties shortly before the AT-AT barge lands on Jiroch-Reslia with all 525 passengers:
"I have taken the liberty of signing the contract with the Jiroch-Reslia government on our behalf for building this dark-sided Force-nexus. We only have a million credits to build this dark-sided Force-nexus: any cost overruns, or penalties for being behind schedule, will have to be paid against Star Tours' pockets. Any surpluses will be shared equally. So long as you agree to this, I am ready to deploy the requisite equipment"
"May the Force be with us" Merrily told the passengers.
"I hope the First Order's Ministry of Transportation agrees with such morbid methods of tourism, and such commercialization of a dark-sided Force-nexus"
[member="Harley"] [member="Darth Veles"] [member="Darth Manah"] [member="Velok the Younger"]
THE TUNROTH GOVERNMENT ANNOUNCES THE CONSTRUCTION OF A DARK-SIDED FORCE-NEXUS
Lesrekta, Jiroch-ResliaIn memory of the Reslian Purge, the Tunroth government has announced the construction of a dark-sided Force-nexus. The contract for the Force-nexus has been awarded by a consortium including Star Tours, as well as a group of private contractors. It is expected that the consortium delivers the dark-sided Force-nexus before Halloween for less than 1 million credits, and is expected to make a return on the investment within a few months of the Force-nexus opening. The Jiroch-Reslia Minister of Culture had the following statement to say about the decision of building the Force-nexus: "The decision to build the dark-sided Force-nexus comes after the realization that the most cost-effective way to attract tourists to Jiroch-Reslia is to build a horror-themed amusement park around the capital. Yet, the most cost-effective way to guarantee the psychological thrill rides of tourists' lifetimes is to build a dark-side nexus. We found that we had a foundation to build one: the massacre of Tunroth dark-siders in 10 BBY during the Reslian Purge" However, the First Order and the corresponding unit of dark-siders, the Knights of Ren, declined to comment.
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With the promise of a year-round Halloween for Jiroch-Reslia's residents, the Tunroth government on Jiroch-Reslia especially since Dunames flew one more flight of the with Darth Veles flying first class on the Moonlight Monument for free, alongside the other Sith hired to build the Force-nexus. Upon reading the contents of that TOoaST article, many passengers onboard were incredulous: they couldn't believe Star Tours would engage in such folly, even though said folly was rather low-cost. There was truly nothing too outlandish or morbid for Star Tours: not even that ski station on Hoth was morbid enough for her. Luckily she decided to keep to the same three or four expert-level trails as originally built and to cease expanding the resort along the slopes of Mount Ison: many customers have found they could go on just one of those trails before seeking heat indoors. Along with the Taking Off on a Star Tour article, she transmitted the following to all other interested dark-sided parties shortly before the AT-AT barge lands on Jiroch-Reslia with all 525 passengers:
"I have taken the liberty of signing the contract with the Jiroch-Reslia government on our behalf for building this dark-sided Force-nexus. We only have a million credits to build this dark-sided Force-nexus: any cost overruns, or penalties for being behind schedule, will have to be paid against Star Tours' pockets. Any surpluses will be shared equally. So long as you agree to this, I am ready to deploy the requisite equipment"
"May the Force be with us" Merrily told the passengers.
"I hope the First Order's Ministry of Transportation agrees with such morbid methods of tourism, and such commercialization of a dark-sided Force-nexus"
[member="Harley"] [member="Darth Veles"] [member="Darth Manah"] [member="Velok the Younger"]