The Learner and the Rogue (Alexandra Shadowstalker)

[Nasika Serizawa]

"Oh I see....I mean about the whole not being Sith right now thing." Nasika clumsy said while giving an awkward laugh.

She did have a very resounding name for a woman like herself. It seemed to fit well enough and at least she didn't have the Sith title of Darth in her name anywhere. Nasika did always find a bit confusing to call yourself Darth whatever when the name you had was just as good. Some thing about titles being a name changer always bothered her was all.

@[member="Alexandra Shadowstalker"]

 

[Alexandra Feanor]

"Ya, its an odd thing not being a part of any group now, not a jedi, sith, or Dark Jedi, just a force user roaming free." She laid back and looked up at the sky studying it as if the stars were present and she were looking for constellations. She had a fixation on the sky, it was calming, reminding her of her home back then when nothing mattered but protecting her master's charge. @[member="Nasika Serizawa"]

 

[Nasika Serizawa]

Nasika felt like taking example and laid back herself. She sighed for a moment as she looked up, the sky starting to get a little darker and some of the stars peeking out. It was a rather nice sight, especially with the atmosphere of the waterfall and all adding into the serine feel. Life as a Jedi was all, in the end, a matter of finding peace after all. Being able to bring peace to others and to themselves. This was something Nasika was beginning to understand the more she learned from them. Even when speaking with the former sith turned rouge it was clear even she had some understanding of this. Nasika only wondered what turned her path would take her in the future.

@[member="Alexandra Shadowstalker"]

 

[Alexandra Feanor]

@[member="Nasika Serizawa"]

"I have a question for you Jedi, what made you decide to become a Jedi instead of going to the sith, i mean i know you've told me once but the allure of power had certainly taken a hold on your mind once, no? Why did you not fall to such an allure and choose a side that very might have well been exterminated had the sith been more united?" She didnt move from the position she laid in, calm and peaceful now with her hair out in all directions around her. She was at peace here, she loved Alderaan and wished there were more like this Jedi, who didnt care about power so much as just enjoying the peace and serenity.

 

[Nasika Serizawa]

Nasika felt the need to sit up for this. It was interesting because she'd not been asked before, at least not by any of the other Jedi. She just guessed that most who discovered force abilities would want to come to the Jedi or even want to avoid the Sith now that their Empire was gone. But she did have her own reasons for going to the Jedi first.

"Because....I don't want to hurt anyone." Nasika began to say. "I've been bullied a lot as a child. And in the end the Sith are nothing more than bullies. When I discovered my force abilities I could've easily used them for revenge....but I didn't. My father had always said the stronger person is not the one with power but the one who knows how to properly use it. That's why I knew I wanted to be with the Jedi."

@[member="Alexandra Shadowstalker"]

 

[Alexandra Feanor]

"And so you agree then that the invasion of the Sith Empire was necessary, bare in mind that the Jedi struck first, as with the Fringe. I dont mean to turn you against your order, but you must relize that the Jedi are not as they used to be and it is up to those like you to return it to such a way. I dont argue that attacking the sith was the right thing to do but even as we speak the Jedi of your order are out conquering and fighting, did there not used to be a time when your order sat around and meditated?" She leaned forward, she had no intention to turn this one from her path, only make her think. @[member="Nasika Serizawa"]

 

[Nasika Serizawa]

Nasika was, admittedly, taken back by what Alexandra was saying. The Jedi were, as she began to see, a bit more towards the ways of warmongering. That was not to say they didn't still stand for what was right but to be the ones to attack first, even with the Fringe, it did seem a bit out of character. Still Nasika did have that part of her that would agree it was necessary. Still she wasn't exactly one to want to go out and fight with someone, even if they were Sith.

She looked towards the waterfall, seeing how peaceful it was, and said "I don't want to fight people. But at the same time...I don't want to sit around when bad things happen to people. And sometimes, if it means cutting something off from the head, then sometimes it's reasonable. But....I still don't think I could be the one to attack first."

@[member="Alexandra Shadowstalker"]

 

[Alexandra Feanor]

"I heard something once, i think it went 'if we do nothing we are evil for letting the weak be wounded, but if we do act we are evil for putting out necks out in places they should not be.' An interesting quote no? I think is sums up your situation and many other Jedi quite well and i would do well to decide this. Cause death or let death happen, which is harder to do and which is less wrong, as we both know neither choice is right and someone that says otherwise is lying to themselves." @[member="Nasika Serizawa"]

 

[Nasika Serizawa]

It took a moment for Nasika to process everything she said, being how double sounding it was. But it was true. It just let death happen one way or another wasn't something Nasika could agree with. It did however make her question what it would be like should she have to slay an enemy in combat. The idea of needing to take someone down if they refused to surrender or the choice came to either either them or some innocent, could Nasika make that choice? She began to look worried and even felt a little sick, holding her stomach for a moment as she closed her eyes and tried to breath through her mouth.

@[member="Alexandra Shadowstalker"]

 

[Alexandra Feanor]

Alexandra watched with sad eyes and prodded her own left side for a moment before swallowing and speaking lightly, her voice soft and kind. "You see, its hard to think of such things, those that are unavoidable. You never forget your first kill, you never forget the pain in their eyes or the hurt in their expression, broken dreams and hopes shattered by your hands. It is the outcome of war and the problem that plagues this galaxy, a problem that is partaken by every government and every soldier causes these problem and atrocities, i have caused these and so will you if you join in battle with your fellow Jedi. Never forget, we are weapons to be wielded by those above us, Jedi High Council, Emperor, Supreme Chancellor, Viceroy, or anyone else that dare calls themselves leaders. Even i am forced to do so because of my master's own final wish, that is the irony of all that i have said. The force is no gift but a curse in which power and greed are chief, in which death always follows the wielder of its power." She sighed and just laid there as the stars began to shine brighter. @[member="Nasika Serizawa"]

 

[Nasika Serizawa]

Nasika managed to recover enough before hearing what Alexadra said again, how they were slaves to both the force and the wills of the higher authority. Nasika agreed but at the same time she was thinking, so much so that you could almost see it in her eyes. There had to be a way for some middle ground. Some way she could do what she knew was necessary but also within her will and what she thought was right. As such she'd come to a conclusion of her own.

"Perhaps that is what I should strive for. To be a Jedi master and possible one of the council. That way I'll be able to make those decisions. But I'll strive for more peaceful means. Ways of being more like the Jedi of old were. No waring over territory but striving for unity."

She knew the idea sounded a little too grand but still she felt that it was something worthy of her skills. Something she knew she could achieve if she put her mind to it. She wanted to be good and do good, but not if it meant being at the mercy of another person's will.

@[member="Alexandra Shadowstalker"]

 

[Alexandra Feanor]

"And when you do, come and find me and i might actually congratulate you." She didnt mean the statement cruelly or in a rude tone at all, actually it had a tinge of hope in the words that were mixed with the expected Sarcastic tone. "But the council is not one person, you will need help miss and that is something you must find in the world that you live in now. Becareful though of who you trust, not all Jedi are trust worthy or Just, remember." @[member="Nasika Serizawa"]

 

[Nasika Serizawa]

"I will." Nasika nodded while smiling at her. Even she could tell it was more of a sign of hope that sarcastic remark. After that she stood up and said "It's getting late. I guess I should get back." She gave a bow to @[member="Alexandra Shadowstalker"] and said "Thank you. This may not have been the emditation I was seeking, but my mind is a little more open and clear now. I see what I may have to do on my path in the Jedi order."

@[member="Alexandra Shadowstalker"]

 

[Alexandra Feanor]

Alexandra nodded and fished for something before throwing it to Nasika, the item being a datachip. "Incase you ever need any help, like i said i find meditation to be quite boring in the long run and would be glad to just talk once more or help out a Jedi that actually makes alittle bit of sense." On the chip would be a frequency to Alexandra's own comlink and several other pieces of information, those being a exact schedule of what planet she was on at any time. @[member="Nasika Serizawa"]

 

[Nasika Serizawa]

Nasika smiled and nodded before putting the datachip into her own comlink. After the data was set she pocketed the chip before giving one final nod goodbye. Eventually Nasika would reach one of the cities again and, by the next morning, would be off on a shuttle back to Courascant. Still she felt she'd gained more than just some major understanding of the force, but also an understanding of Jedi and being Jedi and the like. A whole new world was open to her and it was thanks to a rouge force user who'd turned away from the dark side and had a greater calling now. Nasika could only smile as she was glad to have made a friend and found a promising teacher of sorts.

@[member="Alexandra Shadowstalker"]