Private Staring Straight Into The Shining Sun

[Lief]

They had agreed to meet outside of her apartment block, on the ground level.​

​

Eliphas had arrived early, nervously holding a small box in his hands as he waited for her to descend. Was she going to show up? They had spent the past few days in one another's company, wherever neither of them had other things to tend to such as therapy or meditation - and Force, if Eliphas had disliked those meditative sessions before, now he outright loathed them - they had painted and laughed and eaten junk food. But it had always been in the comfort of her apartment.​

​

This... This was different. New territory. He inhaled a slow breath to push back any doubts he might have had, and drummed fingertips atop the surface of the box.​

​

Maybe arriving early had been a mistake. Now all he was left to do was think and idle; it wasn't the best combination for one so worried.​

​

Iris Arani ​

 

[Iris Arani]

Where Lief was early, she was late. She learned his colors. Was it because he was around so much, or just because she learned how to see where the colors started to tell people apart? In a way, just being around him and painting had been helping her learn more about her connection to the Force and what she could do with it.

But right now that wasn't on her mind. She stared at the appartment door, her hand on the handle. Hesitating. How many minutes had ticked by as she just stared down at her hand? She never cared much about how she looked. The disfiguring scars didn't upset her to see. But they upset other people. The shop owner was a friend. A kind older man who helped her with her paints all the time. But, what would they think if they saw her now?

What colors would they give off?

She didn't want to upset her friend. Any of them. Plenty were, because of what happened. She knew Eli was there, down the stairs, but still she hesitated. .. No, she couldn't make him wait any longer. The nervous orange had started to spread. So finally she opened the door and went outside.

She was over dressed. Keeping her scars as covered as possible. Not wanting to upset anyone who happened to see her. She'd give him a brief smile once she was finally outside, bowing her head.

"Sorry I took so long. I'm ready."

 

[Lief]

All of his worries drifted away when he saw her leaving the complex. Instead a smile spread across his face, relief coursing through him and then just excitement at the prospect of what lay ahead. She was overdressed for the day, but he couldn't much blame her for that. Outside of attending physical therapy, she seemed to have just been home. This felt like it should have been a big moment.​

​

He tried to approach it as casually as he could. Drawing attention to that fact wouldn't help... He had the feeling she might see it more as a jab at her newfound hermitism than anything else, however well intentioned it might have been. So no. Instead he grinned at her.​

​

"You took precisely as long as you needed to," he assured her with a nod, quite forgetting the box which lay in his hands for a little while as they began to head off in the direction of the store. While he was glad to see her out and about, he didn't want to make a habit out of dawdling just yet. What if it became overwhelming for her? No, they'd press on so that she could find respite at the end of it all.​

​

"It's lovely to see you again, Iris. Paint anything new last night?" It had, after all, only been an evening since they'd last seen one another. The past week or so that had been pretty standard. He'd arrive once her PT was over, they'd paint, talk, eat, sometimes they'd watch something while waiting for inspiration to strike but truthfully the holotv was gathering dust. He'd leave when it started to get dark, and they'd start again all over again the next day.​

​

Eliphas was so close to finishing his work. By contrast, Iris had a whole host of masterpieces waiting for the right home. He'd never been quick though, not where paintings were concerned.​

​

The drumming of his fingers atop the box made him remember it, but he waited a little while longer before bringing it up.​

​

Iris Arani ​

 

[Iris Arani]

Precisely as long as she needed? Iris tilted her head, confused for a moment. She'd just stared at her door for several minutes, was that really what she needed to do? .. Maybe. Oh. She came down. That's what he meant. No matter how long it took, she still came down. Yeah. That's what mattered. A bright smile took over her features as she nodded. "Sort of. No paint, just more sketches. Painting is more likely to make a mess and upset Bri." Not upset Bri. Nothing Iris did seemed to upset Bri these days. Maybe it was because of the scars. Yeah, that's another reason she wanted to keep them so hidden.

".. Anyway, you ready to go to the store? I can introduce you to the owner."

 

[Lief]

"I bet you're getting close to needing a new sketchbook at this rate," he said with a gentle grin. Eliphas had really enjoyed flicking through the one she'd brought out to show him that first day he'd arrived, she was a master of multiple mediums and in a way he envied her that diversity. It really seemed to be her thing, and it showed.​

​

"Yep! Ready as ever. It'll be nice to stock up on things, I didn't really bring very much with me when I left Teta. It's nice to know that I'm actually able to pick things up and pursue hobbies even with being a Jedi now..."​

​

Had part of him been worried about that? Yeah. But what nobleboy wouldn't? It was a farcry from what he'd been raised with, but honestly he'd adjusted pretty well to it. The Atale had helped to soften the blow.​

​

Before they could reach the store proper, Eliphas reached out and gingerly touched Iris' arm to get her attention. "I, uh... I got you something." Pausing where he stood in the street, and waiting for her to turn, he held out the rectangular box to her. It was a plain design that didn't show any hints as to what lay inside.​

​

Iris Arani ​

 

[Iris Arani]

Was that a normal worry for someone to have? Iris tilted her head, glancing to Lief as they walked down the street together. Another thing she couldn't understand. Her life had been a haze of color, so her life as a Jedi was really where her life started. What was Eli's life before? Was he always part of that crew she'd met him with? Questions now began to fill her mind. Not that she'd ask any. Not here, not now.

Maybe if she remembered later.

Her gaze drifted with her thought, but his touch had her stop. She blinked, glancing back to him. Something? Then to the box in his hands. ".. A gift?" That's what this was, right? She didn't remember much about Life Day, but she did remember that she learned what gifts were. Or were supposed to be at least.

"What is it?" She asked as she already started to open it. Way too curious what could be inside to even wait for an answer.

 

[Lief]

Eliphas was on pins as she took the box and began to open it. Would she like it? Would she think it was stupid? Oh, Force, what if he'd overstepped...​

​

Inside the box was a brand new Holopad; it was small and wrist-mounted, the size of a wristwatch, but with the functionality of a high tech computer. Holonet capabilities, all the bells and whistles, built in comms. ​

​

The boy swallowed.​

​

"I just, I thought maybe I could show you how to use it," he said, hands fidgeting at his sides and colour rising within his cheeks. "You can use it to call, or message others, but it'll do a whole lot of other things too! Play music, let you access the holonet. You can configure the size it projects, too, and---"​

​

He fell silent. Swallowed again.​

​

Force, what if she didn't like it?​

​

Iris Arani ​

 

[Iris Arani]

A new holopad? She blinked, staring at it for a moment. Honestly, she felt bad. Lief had gotten her a new gift, but she didn't know how to use it. How much did this cost him? Then he offered to show her how to use it. "Yes!" She blurted out before really thinking about it. Interrupting him at that. She blushed, embarrassed by the outburst before holding the box closer to her chest. Smiling faintly. Looking away.

"I.. Don't really know how to use it, so yes. .. If you want to show me, I'd love that."

 

[Lief]

All doubt washed away in the wake of her outburst, and Eliphas just stood there with a smile creeping across his expression. Yes... She'd said yes. Then she further expanded on it, explained her lack of knowledge on how to operate such things.​

​

"It's not that difficult once you get used to it, I promise. But, here..." Gently, so that she could stop him if she wished, he took the box from her and removed the device from where it was nestled. "Hand please, Miss," he requested with a grin, and should she comply he'd set it in place upon her wrist. Not too tight that it would be uncomfortable, but not so loose that it wouldn't remain in the correct position. Just perfect.​

​

That's what he was aiming for.​

​

"We can go over it some more when we get back to your place," he assured her with a nod. Releasing her hand, he gave her a moment to look it over. The colour he'd chosen for the strap - the straps could be changed out on a whim - was a sunny yellow-orange hue.​

​

He returned the lid to the box, and carried it for her as he resumed their walk toward the art store.​

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Iris Arani ​

 

[Iris Arani]

Not too difficult once she got used to it. There were a lot of things in her life like that. And things that should've been but weren't. .. Maybe having help would change it for the better then? Iris retreated in her head, thinking through it all as she held out her hand for Lief . Her left hand. Having something strapped to the heavily scarred right might not feel the best. And she wasn't willing to test it.

Not with how kind Eli was being. No, she didn't want to bring down the mood.

".. Yeah, when we get back." She zoned back in at the tail end of what he was saying, smiling softly. Her gaze stayed on the gift, inspecting the holocom, the straps of sunshine. Sunshine? She blinked, slowly. Then blushed.

Sunshine again.

"U.. Um. Is there something specific you might want in the store? .. So we have an idea on what to look for." And not think about sunshine for a bit. It made her happy, but.. Why did it make her feel sad at the same time?

 

[Lief]

Now that they were in agreement, they could focus on the way forward again. He noticed the tender blush which overtook her, and felt a similar one of his own rising up in the fleeting moments of silence which hung between them. Comfortable silence again, he noticed.​

​

Her question left him thinking, and he raised a hand to rub at the back of his neck. "Um, canvases and oils, I guess, some nice brushes too." It wasn't until he'd spoken such that he realized all the other things he took for granted and would need too. "Uh... Probably an easel... A pallet knife? Pallet..."​

​

Dizzying.​

​

Utterly dizzying.​

​

Fortunately for Eliphas, he'd been surprised to find out his parents were sending him stipends every now and then to help keep him afloat and remove any burden from the New Jedi Order's funding itself. They could afford to support him, after all, and they'd made it very clear that they would. Even if Eliphas wasn't going to keep living in the lap of luxury, he could still be afforded somethings. Like this.​

​

"Sounds like pretty much a little bit of everything, huh? Hopefully the owner won't mind..."​

​

Iris Arani ​

 

[Iris Arani]

"Why would they mind?" Iris tilted her head, watching Lief . She stopped walking, though not because she was waiting for an answer. They were outside the shop. A small laugh escaped her before she opened the door, beaconing him in. "They sell paint supplies. The more you buy, the more they make, right?" That was the purpose of owning a shop. She'd learned that recently! And seemed pretty proud that she actually understood it.

Iris herself didn't linger long. Once Eli was inside the store she wandered off to start picking out the various supplies she used to try and help him find a baseline. A hovercart was taken, if only to carry all the things he was going to need. "Do you just plan to paint? They have other things here. Like clay, stone for carving. A lot of cool stuff that I don't even know, too."

 

[Lief]

"oh... Yeah."​

​

No chit, Eliphas, stores wanted to sell wares. Even so he didn't want to overload the vendor with a hundred million items being rung through at once. Not that even he could afford that much. No, he'd try to keep it simple and basic and...​

​

Holy moly this place had a lot of items.​

​

He walked among the shelves as Iris did the same, glancing over everything that was on offer. He put a few items into the cart that he knew he definitely wanted, such as the easel, pallet, and pallet knife, then fumbled some when she asked her next question.​

​

"Uhhh........."​

​

Other mediums?​

​

Eliphas had never worked with other mediums before. Just paint and canvas.​

​

"I wouldn't even know where to begin," he stated. Nor did he have the room to store too many things. "I think maybe painting is best, for now. Maybe if I get a place of my own outside of the dorms, I'll have the space to try more. But uh... Yeah. I think painting's enough."​

​

He'd taken on a crimson hue, overwhelmed with all the options.​

​

Iris Arani ​

 

[Iris Arani]

Iris blinked, looking back to Lief . Was he.. He was overwhelmed? ".. There are dorms here?" Of all the questions that came, that was the one she went with. Take his mind off the overwhelming choices. Instead focus on that. She hadn't ever been in the dorms on Coruscant. Just the apartment that started as a hide out. Now it was her home. Should she move to the dorms though, as a Jedi? Did it matter?

"I didn't realize they'd rebuilt the dorms already. .. I should go help. We both should. Rebuilding." She nodded, filling their cart with literally everything she could think of. Whatever he didn't take, she'd just bring home anyway so it didn't matter too much.

 

[Lief]

"Mhm," he responded, grateful for the distraction away from all the choices ahead of him. Among what he picked out for himself, he made sure to add some of the same sort of paint she'd had in her apartment already, to restock what he'd used, as well as a really nice looking sketchbook with thicker paper that could withstand a few different mediums. Hey, he had to thank her somehow.​

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"I saw they were working on that, rebuilding I mean. Is that something we're allowed to help with?"​

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He pondered that for a moment, before nodding his head. "Well if we can I'm down to. The least I can do, this is my home now after all."​

​

Anything else they were missing?​

​

Eliphas couldn't rightly think of anything. So he started to head toward the cashier's desk instead. Reaching into his coat pocket, he pulled free a metal wallet within which a couple of cards were housed. He slipped one free, better this than dealing with literal credit chits no?​

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Iris Arani ​

 

[Iris Arani]

"I don't see why we wouldn't be. We're allowed to fight wars." And get hurt in them. Without even realizing how hot of a topic that was Iris just moved on, still gathering supplies until their cart was filled to the brim. "Yeah. Maybe some time tomorrow? .. It'd be good to do something outside the apartment. That's not.. Y'know." PT. She truly was tired of PT. Once they made it to the counter she smiled to the older man, who smiled back.

The man didn't say anything. But he accepted the card, bowed his head. He was very friendly, he just couldn't talk. Maybe that's why Iris and him got along so well. They learned to communicate without needing to think on what to say. Iris bowed her head before gathering up the supplies in the bags. As best she could with her still healing arm at least. There were a couple silent moments of frustration as she couldn't lift the bags without her hand giving out and them dropping the mere inch they'd been lifted.

 

[Lief]

"Alright... Tomorrow then. I'm just about done with my painting, anyway. Maybe it'll help me find some more muse. Who knows."​

​

He smiled at her, though that smile wavered ever so slightly at talks of war. This was a subject he'd brokered before, it had brought with it all manner of uncomfortable thoughts and he'd been hellbent on not participating in such. In outright refusing, finding another way to serve the Jedi and the Galaxy at large.​

​

But in that moment, something within him stirred. He looked upon her with an unexpected intensity, drawing a comparison between the two, and in that moment he settled on a new thought.​

​

Maybe the best way to help was to ensure something like this didn't happen to another. Maybe to take a stand in defense was precisely what was needed. That didn't mean he had to succumb to hostility, or brutality, he could do as he'd seen Mathieu Brion do back on Ossus and diffuse the situation swiftly and without bloodshed. But he couldn't do any of that while hiding away from reality.​

​

None of this was voiced aloud of course. No. Instead he held it deep within himself, something to ponder for later, and approached the mute cashier.​

​

It didn't take him long to realize the man could not speak. He didn't pressure him to speak beyond his initial "Hello, lovely day outside isn't it?" When no response came, and the card was simply taken, yeah he'd figured it out for himself. No matter.​

​

He raised a hand to take some of the bags from Iris, though he made sure she was left with at least one of her own to carry with her good hand. There would be no hero complex in sight, he would not baby her or try to make her feel invaluable. But at the same time he would not allow her to overburden herself in her pursuit of trying to prove herself either. Nope. Not happening.​

​

"Come on, Sunshine; Why don't we take the scenic route back?" He glanced past her to the shopkeeper. "I hope to see you again soon, good sir. You have a lovely rest of your day."​

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Iris Arani ​

 

[Iris Arani]

Regardless of his intent, it still made her feel weak. How many times had she bought this much stuff before and brought it all back on her own? The limit, the change from what she was to what she is, sometimes it was just too much. Iris stayed quiet, holding the one bag in hand as she followed Lief out of the store. Giving the shopkeep one last smile as an unheard conversation concluded between them.

She still pushed herself. The one bag was now shifting between her hands. Testing her limits, trying to see how long her mangled hand could hold the bag before she needed her left to carry it instead.

"Do you have scars?"

 

[Lief]

The question made him think for a moment.​

​

Then he nodded his head, just once.​

​

"Many."​

​

The word hung heavy between them for a moment, and in that time he noticed the way in which she kept switching the bag between her hands. He offered her down a second, the lightest of the ones he held but hopefully enough that she could feel satisfied with her share of the weight, then he exhaled a sigh. There were plenty of things neither had shared with the other, he didn't even really know what had caused her scars. But this felt like one of those moments which required expansion.​

​

"I mean, I have small ones here and there that all kids get, especially kids raised with rapiers in hand, but..." He swallowed, and his grip on the bags seemed to tighten for a moment. "The Atale, you remember that ship, the one I worked for?" A pause so she could recall, before he carried on. "Well... Uh. She crashlanded. Straight into some moon, filled with weird trees that wanted to eat everything and everyone but were way too resistant to really stop."​

​

Over explaining. When would he learn not to over explain? Though maybe that was just his way of stalling away from the facts.​

​

"Anyway... I made it out of that situation with plenty of new scars, and burns. My leg wasn't the same for a while after. But uh... I guess I was the lucky one. The uh, only lucky one."​

​

He stared dead ahead, refusing to meet her gaze as that revelation hung between them. His hand itched to reach into his pocket, to fish out the crystalline necklace which made made a home in there, but it was just out of reach. Too many bags. Maybe that was for the best, a crutch wouldn't help him all that much in that moment.​

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Iris Arani ​

 

[Iris Arani]

Trees that wanted to eat everything?

".. Drengir?" She knew Drengir. She'd gotten.. Some of her scars were from one. Though, they couldn't be seen anymore. Not under the other layer of scars. Still, he survived the crash. .. The only one to survive the crash. Iris watched Lief for a moment, no longer walking. She didn't even take the bag, just watching him as he seemed to refuse to look her way.

His whole crew, gone.

".. I'm sorry."