Voice of Naboo
I really love the feedback questions
Briana Sal-Soren
used on her feedback thread to really narrow down on areas of opportunity and feed back as a writer as well.
As Sibylla has reached her one-year birthday as a character on January 25th, and I have reached over 1k posts with her, if those who have the time could really provide some solid feedback on the questions below, it would be greatly appreciated.
Some questions/feedback I'm looking for ICly:
1. Do Sibylla's choices feel consistent across threads?
2. Does Sibylla leave room for other characters to act and respond?
3. Does Sibylla feel too powerful, too passive, or well balanced?
4. When you have read Sibylla, does she come across as predictable or surprising?
5. If you are aware of Sibylla's story, what kind of arc would you like to see her have next?
Questions for me:
From my previous feedback thread, the feedback I received was to delve into more internal thoughts and what she is feeling, thinking, and the like, since she had a tendency to try to play the perfect daughter or politician and keep her composure. I believe that since then, she has actually shown more emotion, a break in composure, and more internal thoughts, and has been through some heavy interactions that not only play on her political views and duties, but also on her personal ones. I try to make her sound more polished and educated, purposely avoiding contractions to give her a bit of a tone like Elizabeth Bennet from Pride and Prejudice. I know I tend to write very long posts, but I also try to shorten them when it feels necessary.
However, to improve my writing, please provide some follow-up on the following.
1. Do my posts flow smoothly, or do they feel choppy or dense?
2. Is my dialogue natural and distinct, or do I need to try to better distinguish different voices?
3. Do I rely on certain words, phrases, or sentence structures too often?
4. Does my writing convey subtext effectively, or feel too on the nose?
5. Are my posts too long? Or should they be shortened?
6. Am I easy to collaborate with?
In General - Nobility Political Characters Questions
Typically, most writers enjoy writing Force Users, though a few enjoy writing Non-Force Users. Sybilla was my take on writing a non-force-user politician with deep roots in Nobility, and how that impacts her as a character and her decisions moving forward. I know I've tried to hype up this type of character, but I wanted to get some feedback on this.
1. Are you interested in reading this type of political character/ nobility class like SIbylla? If so, why or why not?
2. Would you be interested in roleplaying with a political nobility character? If so, why or why not?
3. What story arcs or roleplaying ideas would you be interested in seeing these types of characters in?
Briana Sal-Soren
used on her feedback thread to really narrow down on areas of opportunity and feed back as a writer as well.As Sibylla has reached her one-year birthday as a character on January 25th, and I have reached over 1k posts with her, if those who have the time could really provide some solid feedback on the questions below, it would be greatly appreciated.
Some questions/feedback I'm looking for ICly:
1. Do Sibylla's choices feel consistent across threads?
2. Does Sibylla leave room for other characters to act and respond?
3. Does Sibylla feel too powerful, too passive, or well balanced?
4. When you have read Sibylla, does she come across as predictable or surprising?
5. If you are aware of Sibylla's story, what kind of arc would you like to see her have next?
Questions for me:
From my previous feedback thread, the feedback I received was to delve into more internal thoughts and what she is feeling, thinking, and the like, since she had a tendency to try to play the perfect daughter or politician and keep her composure. I believe that since then, she has actually shown more emotion, a break in composure, and more internal thoughts, and has been through some heavy interactions that not only play on her political views and duties, but also on her personal ones. I try to make her sound more polished and educated, purposely avoiding contractions to give her a bit of a tone like Elizabeth Bennet from Pride and Prejudice. I know I tend to write very long posts, but I also try to shorten them when it feels necessary.
However, to improve my writing, please provide some follow-up on the following.
1. Do my posts flow smoothly, or do they feel choppy or dense?
2. Is my dialogue natural and distinct, or do I need to try to better distinguish different voices?
3. Do I rely on certain words, phrases, or sentence structures too often?
4. Does my writing convey subtext effectively, or feel too on the nose?
5. Are my posts too long? Or should they be shortened?
6. Am I easy to collaborate with?
In General - Nobility Political Characters Questions
Typically, most writers enjoy writing Force Users, though a few enjoy writing Non-Force Users. Sybilla was my take on writing a non-force-user politician with deep roots in Nobility, and how that impacts her as a character and her decisions moving forward. I know I've tried to hype up this type of character, but I wanted to get some feedback on this.
1. Are you interested in reading this type of political character/ nobility class like SIbylla? If so, why or why not?
2. Would you be interested in roleplaying with a political nobility character? If so, why or why not?
3. What story arcs or roleplaying ideas would you be interested in seeing these types of characters in?
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) and it is really showing. I think that there is a trauma in her she has yet to face(not a joke about the scar, haha) but her experiences are making her the leader some wish that they were.
