Adjudication [Elpsis]

[Laira Darkhold]

Laira nodded, wrapping her brain around the concept of keeping a reminder. It was morbid, and possibly leaning into the occult as far as Laira was concerned, but it was something for Elpsis to look upon and remember who she had been and what she had done to get where she was. Perhaps it was a good thing, maybe it helped her. Still Laira hoped that one day Elpsis wouldn’t need such a trophy, wouldn’t look back at herself as weak or as a victim when she thought of her past. “If it helps you, and doesn’t bring you pain or fill you with hatred, then I suppose it serves its purpose.” She said.

“I do remember Tempest. She’s nice, pretty too.” Laira said, trying to focus on the good. She and Tempest had fought together on Arkas before against the Zombie outbreak. She had still been missing her arm at the time, but she had spent most of the fight flirting with Tempest to some degree. “Like I said, I’m glad you found someone. No one should be alone. Least of all when surrounded by people.”

“I am happy for you Elpsis. You seem to have everything figured out, all that’s left for you is to walk the path and keep strong it seems.” She smiled. Healing from such an ordeal took time, and she knew that, but it seemed Elpsis was well on her way. She didn’t need Laira, not really. The redhead supposed that was a good thing, better she have already found her feet than rely on someone who was unstable and still finding their own.

[member="Elpsis Kerrigan-Alcori"]

 

[Elpsis Kerrigan]

[member="Laira Darkhold"]

"Yes, I think so," Elpsis said simply. Laira was doing her best to be friendly and engage her now. In truth, Elpsis had more doubts than she let on. She was inexperienced and new to leadership. Soon she would have to lead in battle. Sacrificing herself was one thing. She had expected to die on Tephrike when she made the choice to stay behind. Sacrificing others was another.

It was all well and good to say that 'no one gets left behind'. But the truth was that sometimes they did get left behind. What had Natalie called it again? A good phrase for building morale. She clamped down on the feeling. If she looked back and let doubt enter her heart, she was lost.

She had been fortunate that people had come for her. Perhaps it had been nepotism. She would be dishonouring the sacrifice of those who had died fighting the Dominion to save her if she wallowed and let selfish doubt weigh her down. And Laira was not someone she would confide in. Not at this juncture, at any rate.

So instead she said something else. "Don't let a lot of news from the Core, but I heard Imperials moved on Alderaan. I'm sorry. Can't be easy. Have you heard anything from your parents?" she asked.

 

[Laira Darkhold]

Laira was trying to focus on being happy for Elpsis, even if she hoped she would eventually brighten and return to her old self, she understood that might be a pipedream. The redhead Jedi knew she wasn’t the same person she had been the last time they had met either, and she had no intentions of going back.

“So long as you’re happy and healthy.” She said, wanting so badly to reach out and provide a comforting touch or something to let her friend know she was happy for her, that Laira was glad Elpsis was comfortable with how things worked out, that she was finding her own place. She knew it would take time, but she hoped, really hoped that one day she and Elpsis could be friends and count on each other once more, but Elpsis had to want that for it to happen.

The mention of Alderaan brought up fresher wounds however. “Not much. Just a text that they would be cooperating with the Imperials and that I was exiled. Then cut off communication entirely.” She choked a little bit as she said the words, but it hurt all the same. Laira knew they were just trying to do what was best for the people of Alderaan, trying to save them from a painful occupation, but it felt like she was more alone than ever.

“I’m sure they are fine. Mom’s been good to the people. They might be upset, but they’ll support her decision whatever it is in the end. Thanks for checking on them.” Her voice was grateful, cracking as it was.

The iron wall of Imperial influence was cast around her home, and though word still got out about its current state, it was less like looking through a window to see what she could go back to now.

[member="Elpsis Kerrigan-Alcori"]

 

[Elpsis Kerrigan]

[member="Laira Darkhold"]

Elpsis was quiet for a moment, as if brooding on something. "Firemane's got its own intel service. I got no pull there, obviously. A Lieutenant gets bossed around a lot and doesn't get to boss around many people in turn, surprisingly." Military rank took precedence over Force rank in Firemane. Elpsis was acknowledged as a Master of the Order, but since she was a junior officer she was just a small cog in a big machine.

"But I know some people, and got some friends in low places. And Natalie has plenty of sources. Can't promise anything, but I could see if any of them could pass on info. Try to stay abreast of things over there and all that." The Resistance obviously had its own intel assets. In fact, it probably operated more in the Core than Firemane did. Still, it was something. Perhaps it was the thought that mattered.

 

[Laira Darkhold]

“Thanks,” Laira said, trying to smile again. It was a nice thought, though she had her worries about sending anyone there, it was still a show of concern for her family and her homeworld. In the end, it wasn’t the results that mattered, but that she was willing to try. “That means a lot.”

“I know the Resistance is talking about meeting the Imperials in battle.” Rumors that the Fleet might be able to cause the Core Imperials to overstretch with raids combined with fight and fade tactics, especially since they were busy devoting resources to war with the Mandalorians in the mid-rim. “I’ll be there, helping anyway I can when they do.”

“Do you think we can be friends again?” Laira asked quietly.

There was so much doubt hanging over her head, it was time they found an answer to the all important question. It wouldn’t change Laira’s mind, wouldn’t deter her from trying to make up for leaving Elpsis either way, but she needed to know if Elpsis wanted all this.

[member="Elpsis Kerrigan-Alcori"]

 

[Elpsis Kerrigan]

[member="Laira Darkhold"]

Elpsis nodded. "Good luck. And be careful out there. Blaze of glory serves no one, least of all your family." Guilt could provide fuel for someone to do better, but it could also easily turn into a trap. One the one caught inside it could not escape from - and might not want to because it was easier.

Laira's caused query caused her to be silent for a few moments. "Maybe one day. Not now," she said after a while. They were very different people, both in terms of personality, beliefs and aspirations. Moreover, Elpsis was not comfortable around Jedi. Intellectually she knew those on Tephrike were an extreme aberration, but that did not make it easier.

 

[Laira Darkhold]

Laira frowned, troubling to hold everything in until she could be alone once more. The sense of loss had returned, hope seemed to be dwindling. “Battle is chaotic, I don’t know how they will go, but I don’t want to die. I just need to be there, doing everything I can.”

When Elpsis did answer her, Laira nodded, casting her eyes to the ground. “I understand.” Maybe, there was still some hope. Maybe. “Until then, I’ll be out there, somewhere. Wherever the Force takes me. If you ever need me,” The redhead began, trying to muster some semblance of resolve and determination. “Or want me,” Laira added quietly as she spoke, “All you have to do is call and I’ll be there by your side.”

Maybe it was hollow, but now all she could do was wait and see. To hope that she could prove she meant what she said, what she had professed to her friend. “It was good to see you Elpsis, I really am happy for you.” Laira nodded her final goodbye and turned to leave.

[member="Elpsis Kerrigan-Alcori"]

 

[Elpsis Kerrigan]

[member="Laira Darkhold"]

"Yeah...it was good seeing you, too," Elpsis responded. "Take care of yourself," she added after a moment. "May the Lifeweb surround you." That was presumably her version of 'may the Force be with you'. The door opened, letting Laira out the office.

When the Rebel Jedi Princess had departed, Elpsis leaned back in her chair. She sighed slightly, tapping the remaining fingers of her maimed hand against her desk. Then she got back to work. It was getting late, but there were still some matters that needed to be attended to, and she was responsible for more than just herself now.