A Light in Darkness

[Alexandra Feanor]

[member="Matsu Ike"]

Alexandra was here for one thing, on the world of Shiri-Tal (?) And looking over the landscape as she looked for the body of one she contacted through her connection in the Corporate Alliance. She was not here to join the Jedi, nor here to make a business deal, she was here to learn the pinnacle of light side teachings and found herself needing an actual teacher if she was ever going to truly understand just how much effort it would take to learn this... there would be hours of training, probably a few pitfalls, but she was here to learn Force Light.

So she stood there at the ramp of her ship, waiting patiently and silently as she looked towards the Horizon for the former Jedi Master.

 

[Matsu Ike]

[member="Alexandra Lianne Feanor"]

There were a lot of things Matsu was used to but none she really found.. fulfilling but given her training and what had been happening she had found herself teaching and relearning more skills. Taking the gift given to her by Kiskla to the next step instead of treating it like a burden or curse. She would make it into something few could really see before she spoke. Her body wearing a bodysuit and the armor while she checked the grav belt and thrusters on her back and boots. Nothing to large but enough to go into the air and fight as needed. She had a few thoughts of what could be done and wore the black rimmed hat with her black trench coat. Saber on her hips with the utility belt and her disc saber on the small of her back. "It has been some time."

 

[Alexandra Feanor]

[member="Matsu Ike"]

"Indeed, how is life in the Silver treating you, i met another of your group on Voss a while back. Training in the forest and showed me the waterfalls there... almost as beautiful as Alderaan's before the Sith took it. What is it that you yourself are doing on this planet if i might ask miss Ike..." She smiled at the arrival of the Jedi master, curiosity erupted inside her at the presence of the Silver Jedi here of all places past this is where they had chosen to meet... but why here? She was here for teaching though, and was sure the Jedi wanted to get to taht as soon as possible.

 

[Matsu Ike]

[member="Alexandra Lianne Feanor"]

Matsu looked at her and spoke bowing a little. "The Silvers are treating me well, much better then the jedi order did at least. Their lack of need to condemn anyone not thinking as they do is... beneficial. I much prefer it." Matsu continued to look at her and rubbed her hands together while she was thinking about it. They were much more exciting while she continued to walk. "This world for example is beautiful with their influence and the multitude of species within the system. Some good, some bad, some very dangerous but all form a circle and symbiotic system within. It is where I have been relearning all that I lost for a time."

 

[Alexandra Feanor]

[member="Matsu Ike"]

"Interesting... and i do apologize for what the Jedi did to you, not really that i can but hey its not like they will." She smiled and looked out over the lands before turning her head to the woman. "So, what is it that we need to do, as i am sure you have a good feeling my being here is to learn something from you that i am confident the other sects or masters wouldn't even think of teaching me... i know the basics but every time ive tried to use it practically... well i screwed up my insides pretty well last time, luckily the fox brain was there to patch me up... guess i still had a bit more of a taint in me than i thought i had." She of course meant force light, having yet to say its name though.

 

[Matsu Ike]

[member="Alexandra Lianne Feanor"]

"Well the easy explanation for that is because of your uniqueness. Being grey is a very difficult path but it has just as many draw backs as it does benefits. Using the force in perfect balance is possible compared to choosing a side as many have done. I envy that but I also know the problems with it. One is..." Matsu trailed off while she held her hands out and opened them wide. her palms showing while the white light came out." The lightsides greatest powers remain elusive, same as the darksides. A price to pay for the ability to have balance and walk a tightrope." Now she had to smile to that patting her chest as the light disappeared. "It is not an easy skill to learn and the less in tune with the light the harder it becomes to use."

 

[Alexandra Feanor]

[member="Matsu Ike"]

"Well uh you see the problem is... im not really all that grey... -I- can't actually use the dark side at all. I mean i could if i wanted too.. but it would require the schutta trapped in my head to take over and i really like keeping control of my body so i've sort of completely abandoned using the dark side. Its because of her though that i still have that taint and i thought by learning the advanced part of Force Light would help me get rid of her once and for good." She tapped her head, as extra emphasis of the raving murderer she kept in her head.

 

[Matsu Ike]

[member="Alexandra Lianne Feanor"]

Now that was interesting as Matsu listened to that, but she didn't laugh or gawk... more raised an eyebrow. She had heard many names for that part of the brain that was okay with killing. Other had it, she had heard prisoners say the voices in their head told them to kill, some even blacked out and went into a rage doing it... but the voice being able to actually take over.. That was a new one while she stood there standing still for a moment longer. "That is... interesting mostly because I am not sure how to respond to it, in truth theoretically all have a voice in their head. Some call it the conscious but there is more most of the time, it is that part that protects you should danger come. Having it take over your body is an interesting prospect.... Though purging it with the force could be dangerous."

 

[Alexandra Feanor]

[member="Matsu Ike"]

"Trust me when i say, its not what you are thinking of." She smiled and imagined how the woman would deal with hel if Alex let her take control. "How about this, for now we get to where we are going, and on the way i will explain the existence of this voice in my head, agreed?" She kept her eyes on the woman as ignored Hel's rambling inside her head, great the schutta had control of auditory senses... and appearently was tapping into her thoughts. "Also... Daeda, shut her up for five seconds please." She turned her head to the Ashlan wolf that popped out of her robes and onto her shoulder, a few seconds before Hel's voice ended. "Thank you."

 

[Matsu Ike]

[member="Alexandra Lianne Feanor"]

Matsu looked at Alex and bow while she was walking and led the way towards the massive Jun-la's the ridable beasts for traveling while she spoke. "There are many places on Shri-Tal but the temples in the mountains are where things are easier to find and feeling the lightside of the force is easier. Here in the valley the Go nagai's darkness remains as well as the taung." She could explain what they had learned of the system's history but it was a very very strange thing and hard to explain. Most got lost after they heard the species had three eyes and the third was actually another being in their head.... Actually that might be easier to explain with this one as Matsu jumped up onto the beast pointing towards the mountains. "That is our destination."

 

[Alexandra Feanor]

[member="Matsu Ike"]

"We should get going then, no need to keep us all sitting around and waiting for something that isn't going to come to pass." She looked at the creature and approaced it, patting its side as she and daeda both combined their efforts before touching the mind of the creature, settling it before Alex shot up and then on top of the creature. "Hmm.... shall we?"

 

[Matsu Ike]

[member="Alexandra Lianne Feanor"]

Matsu looked at her and the blind creature while she pulled the strap. Moving as it started running off into the distance with the mountains in view. "These creatures are blind but their noses more then make up for it, no better trackers in the galaxy. I believe near forty kilometers range and they can smell scents that are old." She said it with more of a grin though while the creature picked up speed the muscles and legs moving it but not jostling the riders. "We should be up there soon enough now tell me more about this voice."

 

[Alexandra Feanor]

[member="Matsu Ike"]

"Well its me, and not me... you see the voice was a result of me trying to destroy a part of myself taht was detrimental to the advancement of my... self... one minute..." She rubbed her head, thinking slowly before trying again. "I created a separate being through trying to purge the fear, hate, pain, and so on from me while in the certain state that i had developed which allows for a closer connection to the force. The problem is that because of this closer connection it was able to actually become... real. For several months i was having black outs afterwards which were times when this one, who ive come to call as Hel, was taking over and uh... i might have been responsible for the terror attack on Alderaan. Anyways... later on i was on coruscant, helping attack Sith and take them down where i could though i had faced Bal- err sorry, Darth Praelior. She attacked, i fought back, and Hel took over but Praelior was able to do something that forced Hel to split. Which ive come to learn causes my connection to the force to weaken slowly and also give me intense pain, so i killed the body Hel was in and forced her back into my head... She can't take over anymore but shes a pain in the ass to listen too every day."

 

[Matsu Ike]

[member="Alexandra Lianne Feanor"]

Matsu listened to her, hearing it all and taking it in without offering questions until the end. There was a great amount of information there to be had and she wanted to have as much information before offering advice. "Well that is a danger when trying to alter yourself, you must be very careful even more so. We will see how it goes first, I make no promises about abilities or making you stronger. All I can offer is that this will make your learn a skill even if at the most basic levels and perhaps I will find some talent as well. Always good to practice ones techniques." She continued forward, the mountains coming into view while directing the Jun-La and there were all of the other creatures within the Asobi system.

 

[Alexandra Feanor]

[member="Matsu Ike"]

"If i wanted or even expected this to be easy Matsu, i would not have needed to seek your aid in this. You should know me more than well enough to know im a stubborn as a hutt that lost precious cargo." She smiled and looked out over the creatures here as she breathed in. "You know, this place is beautiful, i could deal with some time here like you... not a bad place to live and meditate." She couldn't help but stare at the world around her, she even debated disconnecting from her body and looking into a truer version of life... but with how vulnerable that left her she threw the idea out the door. Matsu was still a Jedi, and she still a grey.

 

[Matsu Ike]

[member="Alexandra Lianne Feanor"]

"This world, this system is many thins but most importantly it is a mystery. With surprises not many expect to find, it is why I enjoy being here and around. Even the local species while some can be dangerous even deadly are also beautiful. Some having lived for millions of years seeing the galaxy change. They are rare to find and have been hunted for their secret to immortality but it is not always so simple. Others are able to mate with any species within the galaxy or have developed along the lines of dangerous predators." She was smiling though while the temple came into view with a waterfall in the center of it behind a large bridge. The buildings and gardens being attended by different species in robes who wore mouth covers.

 

[Alexandra Feanor]

[member="Matsu Ike"]

"Are you the only one that resides in this place, my past affiliations don't exactly leave me on the good side of many silver jedi that i had not been able to really know like you." She took in everything she saw and rubbed her neck as she smiled at the beauty. It reminded her so much of her waterfall, and of Alderaan... With that thought she sighed and looked off to the side as she though about it. She missed alderaan and she was disgusted by what the vong had done to the planet, she would have to make sure to be there when it was retaken and help try to cure it.

 

[Matsu Ike]

[member="Alexandra Lianne Feanor"]

"There are many silver jedi who reside here and on the other worlds... there are some who might not like you for your past but then there are many who don't like me. The difference is what you do with it. For one who has done something you can go the route of self pity and infinite sadness. Feel the weight crushing you daily or you can rise up and try to be better. It might not have me running around the galaxy displaying my power but I have found more peace and purpose in felping others then I ever did fighting for ones who would condemn me afterwards."

 

[Alexandra Feanor]

[member="Matsu Ike"]

"I think about it this way, there is a day when they can turn around, they can mock and toss you down but one day they will see the worth of you... only to toss you away. They can be the petty ones though, i in the meantime will help those in need and im sure that you understand what i mean when i say those in need. That is why i fought for the Sith before, it was that they had people in their empire that needed a voice, but i could not risk my people in that need to help the people of there's."

 

[Matsu Ike]

[member="Alexandra Lianne Feanor"]

"I can understand that and in comparison to many... these sith are very different. There is brutality and evil but there is something that the jedi have been lacking. Unity, purpose. I found more jedi were interested in their political careers, in their own ego to the detriment of everyone else. They were singular while their enemies took their greatest weakness the need to be powerful to be better then everyone else and instead of putting it onto each one of themselves they put it into the group. Made their group better then everyone... rivalry and competition, animosity might still exist but they have adapted it to make each other stronger. A scary notion when the jedi fight among themselves and go after any force user. So unforgiving."