It was a gift and a curse.
For Judah it was mostly a curse.
The Jedi Master was not as skilled in the ability as others, and to a degree he considered it to be a passive thing. He never sought visions, except on a rare occasion. His master had taught him that the vision itself could not be trusted, especially the future. Judah by no means considered himself a prophet, and in the end his master had no need to worry. Judah’s visions were of the past, always a thing of the past and never the future.
It was the reason for the cold sweat on his brow, and the clammy balm on his hands. To him it all seemed like a bad dream, but to the one who lived through it, it had been a nightmare. Judah never understood why the force gave him insights into the past. He had learned to not question it, however. Often his visions of the past shaped the direction of his future. Often he had found ways where others could not because of a vision that took him to a secret passage. It was not a psychometric thing. Simply a vision.
A cry for help.
He had seen it all, the deaths of thousands, maybe more. All eyes seemed to look at him. They had been full of life, and suddenly they were vacant. Where it seemed the force radiated with a vibrancy and excitement, there was nothing.
Was this what it felt like to be cut off from the force, or was it something more, something worse? An insatiable hunger filled him. A longing that could not simply be called a craving. No, the word for what Judah experienced did not seem to exist. He could not articulate what it was that drove him, nor did he know what he was being driven to do. It was not only an insatiable thing, it was an unstable thing.
It controlled him, compelled him.
Then it was still.
He looked up, a face, a calming in the force. Was it a Jedi? Judah could not make out the face, but the aura seemed too familiar. There was an intimacy, an immediate connection as though the force had knit them into one being. Again the Jedi had no words for it. There was nothing he had experienced like it before, and it felt as though he never would again.
The color was strong and it surrounded him. A focus came. There was a clarity.