Chaos,
So this blog is IC, generally speaking, but I felt the urge to make this particular entry OOC.
I'd say I'm not sure why I felt the need to post this, but I'm fairly certain it's the vodka I'm drinking. Speaking of which, it's pretty tasty. If you're underage though, no touchy. We're responsible around here, and I do not advocate anyone doing anything stupid. That goes without saying though. I've built my reputation off of making sure people know when they're being stupid, and telling them not to do it again.
Anyway, as I sit here drinking, I feel an undeniable urge to write something positive. So often my characters are negative - they're crazy, or violent, or evil, or possessed with crippling emotional baggage of some variety or another. In some ways, I can be the same. We often put bits of ourselves into characters. Disciple got my douchebaggery, and Sarge is the result of my friends and I putting ourselves into Star Wars.
Emberli got my distilled masculinity.
Astaire my more... out there side.
But just as anyone who's voiced with me can attest, I can be a pretty outgoing guy. I'm terse through the keyboard, because I like to be succinct.
I would rather say "No, that's stupid," than "It would likely be a better idea if..."
That's just me. Regardless, back on track.
Happiness isn't exactly something I feel is associated with me. Thankfulness less so. But I'm reminded as people write all their blog posts (and I note the irony that this is one) about their personal problems, that we often lose sight of the better parts of life. A year and a half ago, I got dumped. It was my first real serious breakup. It was not pleasant, as these things are wont to be.
But it was formative. I spent a good deal of time moping, and trying to cope, and generally not acclimating myself well. It was a new experience. But as simple as it sounds, what started to get me out of it was this:
I would go outside every day, take in the green of the Pennsylvania mountains, look to the clear blue sky... and just remind myself that the day was a beautiful day. The wind still brushed against my skin, the sun still warmed me. I could still feel the ground beneath my feet as I went on a run. Nothing had changed. Life went on. Sure, I didn't have a significant other, but she didn't want me, so why should I want her?
Life was still good.
And in that time I've found so much to be thankful for. I'm thankful to Cira, for being the social butterfly she is. I met her going on three and a half years ago, and her and her roommate invited me down to go to her roommates concert. That experience was amazing, despite the accident on the way home, and I haven't been the same since. Her bubbly nature and desire to hold social events has really helped mesh some of this community together. She routinely opens up her home to us, and does so with no small amount of grace - her husband is included in this - and they're tremendously wonderful people.
And it's because of her that I got to spend time with people like Reverance (and his wife), who are also wonderful individuals. Rev has some terrific raptor arms, might I tell you. And I've had the pleasure of spending time with Tef, too, who's trusted me all these years for one reason or another. The same goes for whatever character Chris is writing right now (Alric Kuhn, I believe) and Cait (Lorelei Darke.) Both giants in their own rights.
I've met few people as thoughtful as Cait, and fewer still as gregarious as Chris.
We've an amazing cross section of people here, from the snark (and vanity) of Chiasa Vereen, to the gleeful debauchery of Vrag - and also the bro-ness of Anja Aj'Rou. I've also never meet a keener intellect than Jorus Merrill, who is presently handling life like a friggin' champ. Not to mention I've been pleasantly surprised by the likes of Tracyn Ordo, who is literally the most pleasant individual I've ever met, considering what I was anticipating.
If you can't tell, I'm a pretty happy drunk. But the point is this. We're an amazing community of individuals, and while I may be known for being a dick, I still try to pick out the best of the site when it comes to you all. I may be terse, and gruff, and come off like I hate you (and I won't lie, there's times I do,) but I'm here because I enjoy being here. I enjoy reading the stories. I enjoy writing.
I enjoy being a part of what all this is.
So everyone just sit back, relax... and enjoy the ride. It's rare to find a site like this, rarer still to find one that's so close knit. It won't last forever, so just keep your hands and feet inside the vehicle at all times.
Love you guys,
Brandon