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A rant by some random autistic guy

ok ima just be honest since i gotta get this shit outta my brain

expect typos because i type to fast sorry

I feel like i haven't been doing as good as i should when it comes to writing. i know i've only been around for a few months. i know that before this i've never written before and never even thouhgt about it, didnt think it was for me.

But i have been absolutely loved it here so far. i know others have had bad experiances with other people but im lucky since im fairly new(might as well be a baby compared to some of y'all with how long youve been around).

But...when i first started i was respoding to post so quickly, giving long things, like a paragraph or 2. now was it good? eh who knows im not going back to look lol. lately i've been taking days to respond and not writing much in the post. i see everyone else writing great posts and responces and im just here barely saying anything after days. i'v been beating myself up about it. i know part of it will come with time. but i just cant stop feeling bad about it and i have no clue why. my brain just at some point said "fuck you im not giving you any ideas or words to use." i hate it. i want to post and do stuff so bad because chaos is amazing, i love it. but my fucking brain jsut wont. let. me.

i just sit there and stare sometimes wanting to do something, anything but my brain wont fucking let me i HATE it.

and like I want to so bad. I cna do dialog more or less, but i don't want it to be just dialog. i want more then that. like its juts a personal thing. I want SO bad to make logner posts. not just to make long posts but to actually say more. add more to the post.

Actual stuff besides dialog. And not just posts big blocks of dialog either

I've been told im doing good, and it means a lot but still cant help but beat myself up about it. I've been told it will come with time and I know that but yet i cant stop beating myself up about it

ok rant over anyway love y'all keep being great <3
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Reactions: Makai Dashiell, Allyson Locke, Aurelian Sigismund and 1 other person
About author
Novac Lyrikal
Novac Lyrikal
im extremely new to this, not great a roleplaying but i want to get better/more conformable with it :>

Comments

Aurelian Sigismund
It can help to find a structure for your post which you follow, develop, overhaul and continue building to suit your specific brain and muse wave. Writing can be trained just like anything else, you just need to find your rhythm and the stoopid brain will obey. :)

Something like "Opening/Environment - Reaction to writing partner - environmental change due to convo or circumstances - new/continued convo or scene or actiion - effects on environment - ending"
Its just an idea for a concept, maybe its horsemanure for you, maybe not. I can recommend trying it. If you find something you like, it will come automatically and make everything much more smooth and also develop the scene outside of your character's speech. The combination of the environment/other character influence on your character and your character influencing the environment is what keeps the posts going and engaging.
 
Allyson Locke
Don't overthink.

The only reaction that matters is the reaction from the people you're writing with. Maybe reach out and ask if there's more you can do or if they want to see different things from you.

Sometimes if I'm having a block I do a diary entry for my character or write them doing something mundane like gardening or organizing a closet. It helps bring their mind forward so you can tap into it. Also its okay to be slower to post, sometimes burn out happens. I know you've been super active - but be kind to yourself and remember this is a hobby.
 
Kitter Bitters
You could try asking chat gpt for ideas on what your character might do next. For me that seems like a nice way to use AI just to brainstorm. Don’t let it write your posts or you won’t get better but you could use it to bounce ideas around.
 
Makai Dashiell
It took me a long time to learn how to make longer posts. Like started at age thirteen and probably didn't make longer posts until my late twenties type long. What can I say, I'm a little slow.

My advice is to practice. Put up a blog on the site. Write something in docs for yourself. I saw a suggestion to write your character doing something mundane and it has really helped me. Whenever I need a little practice or feel like I need to get into a headspace of a character its great to have them do something mundane like a hobby or observation of a market, thoughts on the news of the galaxy, etc
 

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