Woman Yells at Rock

[Sol Damerin]

Having been born on Coruscant Sol had an almost instinctive desire to flee cities and find the nearest patch of nature. It wasn't that he hated being surrounded by millions of people, tonnes of durasteel, and transports whizzing about. He just really enjoyed the peace and serenity one could find in a forest surrounded by trees, bugs, water, and not a whole lot else.

So after completing a successful job he'd travelled away from the starport city by speeder to the nearest old growth forest, he could find. There he'd hiked for several hours just getting lost in nature before finding a waterfall. Climbing to the top he'd found a spot that was partially shielded from the spray, enough that the rock he was sitting on was dry, perfect for meditating.

Meditation was one thing that the Jedi had right, it was excellent for refocusing your mind relaxing and contemplating life choices. Not to mention the mysteries of the universe like how was it that he could be nearly a hundred kilometres from the nearest yet someone was approaching his position. He could sense the force sensitive person easily as they weren't hiding their presence, he was though mostly out of habit.

Letting out a sigh he hopes whoever it was doesn't spot him, if they spotted him they would approach. Someone you can't sense through the force is always worth investigating. Most of the time he was in a big crowd and easily overlooked out here though his lack of presence in the force would stick out like a sore thumb. However, dropping Force Stealth would call their attention far more readily at least with it up they had to actually see him to notice him. So a small chance he'd be left alone.

 

[Jairdain Ismet-Thio]

Jairdain had been in the forest for a while. Having left the sith when she lost what little faith she had in them, nor did she feel the Jedi she had been before could be brought back. Wanting to be alone, to think and meditate on what path, if it was either of them, she had picked these woods for her escape.

The life of the world and the galaxy went past her and she had no idea how long she had been here. Still her search went on. No answer had come yet. Again seeking to find this, she went to the rock by the waterfall that had found soon after arriving in the woods. Her camp was about an hour away, but the hike was worth it.

Climbing to that rock, she would deftly avoid getting hit by the spray only to get tripped up by a person she had not seen.

"Oh, ooofff."

The muffled sound came from the tripped woman whose face was currently in the leaves and dirt next to the rock. Sitting up, shaking her head, she looked at the rock. Knowing a person was there, but not seeing him was odd to her. Hearing the exclamations coming from what she couldn't see or feel though, she knew the person was male. A few heartbeats later, she found him. An odd flowing in the Force. Unfocused eyes turned his direction and he would know she was looking at him.

"Sorry?"

While her voice displayed more surprise and shock than sounding really apologetic, Jairdain hoped the sentiment at least counted.

[member="Sol Damerin"]

 

[Sol Damerin]

The person, whoever it was, came right at him and Sol sucked in a deep breath. This turned out to be a good thing because it gave himself something to have knocked out of him when she walked right into his seated form. He'd expected her to come to his rock and confront him not step on him and once he could talk he let out a truly remarkable string of expletives. He'd been a merc for a while he knew some very inventive swear words.

"...with a Bantha!"

Sol finishes swearing as he pushes himself back into a seated position rubbing his side. It wasn't that it hurt all that much, it had just been so long since something that surprising had happened. His heart had actually been pounding in his chest from the sheer shock, how long had it been since that had happened? His grip on Force Stealth had slipped slightly from the surprise and she knew he was there so he just drops it entirely. It was like dropping a large rock into a pond and ripples of force energy spill out from his location for a moment before settling.

Turning his attention to the woman he sees how unfocused her eyes are. Blind and used the force to see, of course, that was just the kind of thing that would happen to him. He could also sense the dark side on her like a cloud of malaise so she was a dark Jedi or Sith lovely. But she'd said sorry so that was interesting. "No, it is my fault. What was I thinking sitting out here hundreds of miles from civilization believing I wouldn't be disturbed. Truly I should have seen this coming and prepared." His voice was as dry as the desert of Tatooine. "Just tell me if we have to fight now, I want to know how ruined my afternoon is up front." Dark side wielders almost always wanted to fight, maybe even the weird ones who said sorry.

 

[Jairdain Ismet-Thio]

Listening to the colorful words and phrases coming from him, Jairdain wondered if there were any he could teach her. Her own vocabulary for cursing was extensive and different than what she heard others use.

After the stream of expletives and the man reseating himself, he let drop the stealth he had been using to hide and Jairdain was able to actually "see" him. Her face would register the surprise she felt and for a moment didn't speak. Listening to what he said, she smirked slightly. It appeared he had as much humor about things that she did.

"Well, I came here seeking answers, but they have eluded me. Why would I fight you anyway? Well, I suppose I could be upset that you're sitting in a public park at a secluded location that I've been alone at for weeks...I think."

Shrugging her shoulders, if he was empathic he may feel that while she was currently more dark, she was riding a fine line and felt more confusion than anything else. She didn't think her afternoon ruined and certainly didn't want to fight him. Hoping he would realize this, she did keep her hand on her saber hilt just in case. Not one for fighting, she did know the basics in lightsaber combat. Her focus was being a mentalist and her skill set was in that direction.

[member="Sol Damerin"]

 

[Sol Damerin]

That her hand was on the hilt of her saber is not missed by Sol. However, he didn't respond in kind. Was it arrogance? Foolishness? Or was he perhaps so skilled that he believes himself capable of drawing as fast as she? The correct answer was none of the above. He simply knew that if she ignited her saber it would be quicker and easier for him to just throw water at her to short it out than it would be for him to draw his own.

The question she poses him, however, makes him curious. He eyes her more carefully stretching out with the force dropping a metaphorical pebble into the energies around her and watching how they rippled. Seeped in the dark side but not saturated in it. For lack of a better metaphor, she was covered in mud but not entirely mired in it. "I don't know why would you attack me?" He asks after a moment's thought. "Isn't that what Sith do? Prove their superiority by proving they are the strongest?"

"Then again..." He trails off thoughtfully. "You also don't often hear about Sith choosing to meditate in places like this. Usually, your type finds somewhere nice and depressing to meditate on how to I don't know make babies cry or whatever it is Sith do for fun." Despite his tone lacking inflection, she'd correctly identified the fact that he was being flippant. It was one of his foibles that he always sounded completely and utterly serious even when he was being wonderfully sarcastic.

[member="Jairdain"]

 

[Jairdain Ismet-Thio]

When he did not attack her, Jairdain removed her hand from her saber and sat down on the ground near him. The rock was really only large enough for one rear end to sit on comfortably. He asked her the same question back like a consular would and she narrowed her eyes at him slightly with a little bit of a dirty look.

In these woods and her thinking she was alone, she had not bothered to hide her Force presence or alignment, he knew she was dark and commented on it. He also provided the generic opinion of the Sith and she shook her head.

"There would be no purpose in my mind to attack you. The code the sith follow doesn't dictate they need to be evil, chaotic or even harmful. It is all about self empowerment. If you don't know it, I could tell you."

His observation on not hearing about a sith meditating in locations like she brought a small chuckle out of her.

"I'm not like other sith."

Her Force gaze drifted away and to her that was the same as breaking eye contact.

[member="Sol Damerin"]

 

[Sol Damerin]

"Peace is a lie, there is only passion. Through passion, I gain strength. Through strength, I gain power. Through power, I gain victory. Through victory, my chains are broken. The force shall set me free." Sol rattles off the Sith code with the same bland tone he'd used for everything he'd said so far. He sounded like a man talking about the weather with someone he really didn't want to talk with rather than a force wielder chatting with a Sith.

Rubbing his chin he considers it for a moment. "You are right nothing in there about being evil, chaotic, or harmful. Yet most Sith are all three you have to wonder why that is, don't you? Maybe because putting an emphasis on following your passion to gain strength power and victory so you can break your chains, freeing you to do whatever you want, isn't the most conducive to things like consideration and self-recrimination."

Shrugging his shoulder he says blandly. "But what do I know, I am no Sith. And apparently, you aren't like other Sith so you probably don't either. Then again I get the feeling most Sith think they aren't like other Sith. The whole Sith philosophy seems to lend itself to each member believing they are unique and special. Not that they aren't but most of them don't really act like it when they all act almost the exact same way."

If Jairdain was paying attention to the ebb and flow of the force around Sol she might note something interesting. The flavour of the force energies around him seem to change with each breath. When he inhales the force around him seems to waver towards the dark side, when he exhales it seems to waver towards the light. If she was starting to approach the thing line between the two sides of the force he was currently astride it and he wasn't attempting to hide the fact.

[member="Jairdain"]

 

[Jairdain Ismet-Thio]

"So you know the code already. At least we don't need to work on memorization."

His assessment was also accurate, however her dealings with other sith had been limited to a mere handful. All but one were rather unique and even that one had his own idiosyncrasies that made him different than other sith. Placing one of her elbows on her knee, she rested her head on that fist and listened to his words.

"Sir, everybody is unique. Even among the Jedi."

They had now shared names yet, so Jairdain addressed him only by that. As he spoke and breathed, she did notice the fluctuating Force around him. It gave her pause. He wasn't sith, but with that darkness in him, he wasn't jedi either. What was he?

"My name is Jairdain."

They weren't close enough to shake hands, but if they were she would offered it to him.

[member="Sol Damerin"]

 

[Sol Damerin]

Sol waves a dismissive hand. "Yes, yes. Everyone is unique and special. All the Sith all the Jedi so amazingly unique following the same code, philosophies, and basic attitudes. They are unique like different paintings done in the same style with the same pigments, but with different subject matter. But then again that is what happens when you form groups, members of the group fall into similar lines of thinking, belief, and all that other stuff."

While he wasn't normally quite this talkative she had actually, inadvertently, hit upon one of the few subjects he would talk about given a chance. The different philosophies of the force were his primary area of study and critiquing them was one of his favourite pass times. Of course, he normally had these discussions in his head so presented with the opportunity to voice some of his viewpoints he was, without thought, doing so.

It was a small rock so they were close enough to shake hands and he does so giving her's a firm shake. "I would say it is nice to meet you Jairdain but I haven't decided yet if that is how I feel. My name is Sol." He drops her hand and leans back against the rock. Perhaps someone else might have asked some pressing questions or engaged in small talk at this point but Sol didn't really do that. He didn't care why she was out here or what she was doing or what kind of crisis of faith she was having and he couldn't be bothered to feign interest. He'd live a solitary existence for so long expressing such basic politeness, well it wasn't beyond him but he wasn't going to do it if he didn't have to. She should just count herself lucky he was polite enough to give a name.

 

[Jairdain Ismet-Thio]

While his attitude was slightly dismissive, Jairdain somehow knew that wasn't the case. She had his attention and he had hers. His observations were good, it was if they shared the same opinion. He was the first person to be able to objectively talk to about this. Not coming across like he wanted to enforce either code as being right or wrong, that one wasn't better than the other. Maybe like herself, he followed his own code.

The code she followed was that of her people, a people that were now gone. Jairdain was the last of her people, not having met anybody else from her home in the six years since its destruction. Granted one of those years she had been a captive and a previous almost year she had been recovering from being starved and abused after being a captive.

Unsure as of yet if their meeting was a good thing, he at least provided her a name to call him other than sir.

"I think you and I have more in common than not, Sol. Your comments on how the people of these groups are all different, but painted in the same manner. I wonder how many others can tell that?"

She didn't think that many could tell that or be able to talk about it calmly.

[member="Sol Damerin"]

 

[Sol Damerin]

Those words actually get a snort from Sol. "Oh? You think we have a lot in common after all that talk of being unique. I suppose you think I am painted with the same brush as you." Eying her with an utterly neutral expression he asks curiously. "The question would then be, do you think I am painted with the brush of the Sith? Or a different one?" Of course, he already knew the answer to the question.

It had been clear to him earlier that she was edging away from the path of the Sith. That she'd decided that they had things in common suggested that she believed him to be neither Sith nor Jedi. She was right in a way but he doubted she'd quite understood just what he represented. She was right about neither the Sith nor the Jedi being willing to discuss their orders so bluntly though. She'd also likely never find another person willing to talk about the force in the way he would, of course, she'd have to draw that conversation out of him.

[member="Jairdain"]

 

[Jairdain Ismet-Thio]

What she said actually got a reaction from him and his statement brought a little, sad and bitter smile to her face. She shook her head before speaking and redirecting her full attention to be on him.

"There's no way you can be painted from the same brush as me. I highly doubt you have been through exactly the same things I have."

Choosing not to elaborate, she would if he asked. He really was curious on her answer though.

"You're different. Not fully light or dark. Somewhere in the middle. What are you?"

It was her turn to ask and she asked it very straight and to the point. Curiosity showed on her face and in her voice.

[member="Sol Damerin"]

 

[Sol Damerin]

Another chuckle from Sol. "How quickly you forget our metaphor. I could be painted with the same brush but with different strokes or different pigments to create a different image. How would you know? Neither of us knows the other's story." And as far as Sol was concerned it could stay that way. Getting to know people always wound up leading to trouble, once you knew them they expected you to be interested in them and their problems.

The question is met with a quirk of an eyebrow, then he remembers that she likely couldn't see such a subtle facial expression. "That's a broad question. After aren't all of us different things to different people? To some people I am a mercenary, to others a bodyguard, to still others just some random human." He lets her digest this for a moment but he decides to be nice and answer the question she asked instead sort of.

"You point out that I am neither Jedi nor Sith to lead your question into the obvious question of what sect of force wielder. I would counter with a question of my own, why do I need such an identifier? People tend to think in general terms a person who is good who wields the force is a Jedi, evil you are a Sith, neither then perhaps you are a Grey Jedi. However, each of these are little more than religious sects if you think about it. The force is their god and they each have their own way of worshipping it, codes, philosophies, practices. They may not all agree with the exact way to do so but again among each sect broad strokes they generally agree with each other on the proper way to do things. Which brings us succinctly to your original question, what am I? I am Sol, nothing else or more. I follow my own path to understand the force."


[member="Jairdain"]

 

[Jairdain Ismet-Thio]

"Very true, Sol. I'm sure you don't want to hear my story though."

While a few people knew of her life, only she knew exactly what she had gone through. These details she didn't want to get into with a stranger. They had just met and while their chosen conversation topic was quite a deep one, he didn't need to know about her past.

"I've never been an artist so have no real clue about hues or brushes."

It was as close as she going to come to saying she was blind, it would be up to him to figure it out if he hadn't already. Listening to his words, he had her full attention and Jairdain remained silent. His answer was different and unexpected. Enlightening as well, even if he didn't mean for it to be. It told her more about him than maybe he expected.

With her hand that was resting on her leg, she motioned in his direction before speaking, "you are just a not so simple man trying to make his way through life."

Though it wasn't phrased as a question, it sounded like one.

[member="Sol Damerin"]

 

[Sol Damerin]

"I don't." Sol concurs bluntly. "But maybe one day I will who knows what the future holds." He very much doubts they will meet again but it was also possible that they would. The force was funny like that. It had willed them together once who was to say it would not do so again.

He had figured out she was blind early on, based on her eyes, movements, and presence in the force. Also because she tripped on him which no sighted individual would have done. He was pleased to learn she had a sense of humour about though since she cracked a small joke. Some people took their troubles far too seriously.

If he could read thoughts he might have been interested to learn what Jairdain thought she'd learned of him that he hadn't meant to reveal. After all, he'd chosen his words carefully. He wasn't though and instead he simply pondered her not question. "No. I would say I am a simple man looking to understand life. Because what is the force if not life itself?"

[member="Jairdain"]

 

[Jairdain Ismet-Thio]

Nodding at his answer to her statement, Jardain didn't push the subject and let it drop. Neither of them needed to share their pasts yet. Given time though that might change. If they met up again after parting today, that may change. A chance meeting like this though led her think it was more than just that. There was a purpose for it, what that was eluded her though.

Her comment about not knowing about hues and brushes had its intended effect and kept the mood light between them. Having been blind since birth, it was something she was used to. Nothing was going to change that fact after all these years. Granted she could have gotten cybernetic eyes to see with, she liked her vision now. It was so much more than what even he could see with his eyes. She didn't point this out to him. How she was saw wasn't relevant to the conversation.

"Don't you think it should be the purpose of everybody to understand life?"

It probably sounded odd ​coming from somebody so young, but in her short life she had been through a lot and faced her own mortality more often than many others had. This alone had caused her age mentally more than somebody else her age.

[member="Sol Damerin"]

 

[Sol Damerin]

This new question gets another snort from Sol. The girl was young but it didn't mean she was naive, however, that also didn't mean she was wise. Of course, Sol wasn't necessarily wise either but he was fully capable of being a wise ass. Perhaps there was wisdom in that who could really say?

"Don't be ridiculous. If everyone's purpose was understanding life then what would there be to understand? If everyone was doing it we would know that to understand life was to work to understand life." Silly logic but not inaccurate after all if you had a robot who existed to question its existence than that was the reason for its existence now wasn't it?

There is a period of silence and then he says with a sigh. "Alright, I'll ask." He says finally. "Why are you out here?" Holding up his hand he waves it indicating he needs a moment to finish the thought. "I know you are out here because you are questioning yourself and your path. I don't want to know why you are doing that. I want to know what question you are asking yourself."

 

[Jairdain Ismet-Thio]

"Okay, maybe I spoke the wrong words. Perhaps it would have been better said, shouldn't it be the purpose of everybody to quest for understanding their part in what is the life of the galaxy? As a whole, not as an individual."

Many people only focused on themselves, this had seen in her own people. Those that fell to the chaotic dark and the Sith after she was banished and learned of them. This she did not see within the Jedi though, they sought their place as part of the whole, not the individual.

After a few moments of silence, he broke it with his next words. Though she could sense he wasn't finished with his thought when he raised his hand to forestall her answer, she did wait until he was done. Not wanting to know why she was here questioning, he did want to know what she was asking herself.

Letting out a sigh and leaning back on her hands, she would appear to look up at the sky before answering him back.

"It is the same question I asked you, but directed at me. What am I?"

Open honesty for him, there was nothing for her to hide.

[member="Sol Damerin"]

 

[Sol Damerin]

There is a long period of silence as Sol gives the question its due. For some reason, he thinks she deserves a true answer, not the flippant one he might have given off hand. Then he realizes that some reason was actually The Force. Whether he liked it or not he'd been placed her at this time to answer specifically this question for this young confused Sith. Perhaps he was meant to be her tipping point back to the light? But no, if that was what she needed the force would not have sent him. Which meant what she needed was not a push to a light but the view Sol could give her.

"The Force is energy, it moves through us it binds us. It stretches out infinitely from the beginning of time until the end. It knows the hearts and minds of all of us and it learns from us as we learn from it. The Grey would tell you that there is no light or dark side, only the force. I disagree with that. There is only the force and it is light, dark, and all the shades in between. It is a reflection of all living things and we are in turn a reflection of it."

Another period of silence as he frames his next thought wanting to articulate something he'd never given word. He reaches out with his senses and he drops a pebble into the still waters of the force near Jairdain, watching the ripples he learns what he needs to know.

"You ask what you are. You are what you've been taught, what you've seen, what you've suffered, and what you've loved. That is what all of us are products of experience, each one a pebble in the pond creating ripples through us into the force. Jairdain do not question what you are that is obvious. Do not question what you will be that will come in time. The Jedi, The Sith they will offer you a path to follow, one that leads you to be what they want you to be. Instead, ask yourself what you want to be and let the force flow through you and guide you down your own path. You may not become what you wanted to be but in the end, The Force will have made you what you need to be."

 

[Jairdain Ismet-Thio]

The silence between them was more introspective than anything else after she answered his question about why she here. What the question was that she was asking herself. Her answer had been honest and open. For the first time in a year, Jairdain actually felt like she could be open with somebody. Even if he didn't want it, she felt they were meant to have met. If it hadn't happened today, then it may have been the next or even next year.

"You make the Force sound like a deity or god. The ones of my people isn't the Force, I can tell you that. To my people and I am the last of them, there was no light or dark, just the Force. It is the intention of the user that defines if it is light or dark...or so I was taught by the Jedi. The Sith taught me their code and a few skills of the Dark.
"The codes of both so different from each other. Yet both similar to the code of my people."

If he wanted elaboration on that she would, otherwise, she wouldn't say anything about it. He further elaborated his point, but in a way it confused her more. That was sort of why she was here. To figure out what she wanted to be in addition to finding out what she was. She was herself first and foremost, not a creation of somebody else.

"What do I need to be then?"

[member="Sol Damerin"]