Private We’re Improvising Now

[Xian Xiao]

Xian wasn't entirely sure how she felt when Jerrik agreed they should take things slowly. Relief came first, warm and immediate, loosening something inside her that had been wound painfully tight since his confession. Beneath it, though, was another feeling she was considerably less willing to examine. Disappointment. She had just admitted that she wanted to kiss him, and apparently some small, ridiculous part of her had hoped that admitting it might somehow make the decision for her. That he might lean across the space between them and she wouldn't have to be brave enough to do it herself. When he didn't, her eyes lingered on him for a moment before a faint smile appeared. It was probably better this way. Probably.

"Slow," she repeated quietly, trying the word out as though she wasn't entirely certain what it meant for them. They had spent so much time together already that slowing down seemed almost funny. She knew the sound of his footsteps, the moods hidden behind different expressions, the particular tone in his voice that usually meant he was about to suggest something likely to get them shot at. She trusted him with her life without thinking about it. Somehow, kissing him felt more frightening than any of that. "I think I can manage slow."

His promise affected her differently. Xian's smile faded into something softer as she looked at him, and for once she didn't immediately hide behind a joke. Caelan had taught her that promises about tomorrow could be broken without anyone choosing to break them. Jerrik couldn't promise he would always be there. Neither could she. The galaxy didn't work that way, and she knew that better than she wanted to. Yet she understood what he was really offering her. Whatever happened between them, whatever this unnamed thing became or didn't become, he wasn't going to punish her for being uncertain. He wasn't going to disappear simply because she couldn't give him an answer tonight.

"I'd like that," she admitted. Her fingers shifted on the armrest, almost reaching toward him again before stopping halfway. This time she noticed what she'd done and gave a slightly embarrassed laugh. "Whatever this is." She gestured vaguely between them, because apparently she could manipulate the elements but couldn't find a word for what was happening inside her own cockpit. "I don't know what I want to call it yet. I just know I don't want to lose what we already have trying to figure it out." Her black eyes found his again. "And I don't want you thinking that because I'm scared, I don't want it either."

For just a moment, her gaze dropped to his mouth before she caught herself and looked very deliberately toward the navigation computer instead. Apparently taking things slowly was going to be considerably more difficult than agreeing to it. "Not too much longer," she said, leaning forward to check their progress. The familiar information on the display gave her something uncomplicated to concentrate on. "About forty minutes. Enough time to get packed." She glanced toward him again, the warmth in her expression returning along with a little of her usual humor. "If you're bringing anything. Although considering you're apparently leaving nearly everything you own on the ship because Coruscant has security checkpoints, I suppose packing shouldn't take you very long."

She smiled and settled back into the pilot's chair, feeling strangely lighter despite everything they had just said. Nothing had been decided. She still wanted to kiss him. She was still frightened of what would happen if she let herself care for him the way she had once cared for Caelan, perhaps even more frightened because Jerrik had already become such a large part of her life without either of them noticing it happen. Yet he knew now. More importantly, he knew and had stayed exactly where he was. For tonight, that was enough.

Jerrik Molten

 

[Jerrik Molten]

Everything would eventually fall in place for the duo. But for now, Jerrik’s mind could not drift away from the thought of holding Xian closely, gazing into one another’s eyes, the rampant thoughts of love. It all felt right, even if it would take time for them to realize what they truly wanted. Even Xian agreed that a slow pace was a good idea for the time being. Though, Jerrik didn’t want to wait, he wanted to jump across the space between them and start making love right there and now. But he resisted the urge that came with the thoughts. He resisted enough, that the sound of Xian’s voice reminding him how much time was left, caused him to snap out of the daydream. "Damn, yeah, packed. You said that once before, but I was caught up in the moment." He replied calmly.

Jerrik was going to stand up and get things to bring along on their night out, but he already had everything needed for the trip. "Well, I have my lightsaber, robes, and you. I am more than ready for tonight." He glanced over towards the woman to see their reaction. It was obvious that Jerrik was flirting, yet to him it felt natural, as if he didn’t need to be somebody else to impress Xian. He was around the woman so much that she already knew him more than anyone else in the galaxy. That didn’t say much because of how little of people Jerrik knew, but it meant a lot to him.

As Jerrik positioned himself in a more comfortable spot on the seat, he looked over at Xian and continued to smile. "And whatever this is.." He pointed to Xian and then back to himself before continuing on with what he wanted to say in response to what the woman had said a few moments ago. "It will come together when the time is right. No stressing over figuring out what this is, especially when we feel very similar about the situation." He added with a slight wink. Reassurance would go a long way with these two, given their pasts and the things they endured.

Xian Xiao​

 

[Xian Xiao]

Jerrik's declaration of everything he needed earned a slow turn of Xian's head. She looked at him for a moment, caught somewhere between amusement and embarrassment as she realized exactly what he'd slipped into the middle of that list. The warmth that had only just begun fading from her cheeks returned, and she shook her head with a quiet laugh. "Your lightsaber, your robes, and me?" she repeated, raising an eyebrow. "I'm pretty sure I don't count as something you bring along." She tried to sound mildly offended by the idea, but the smile she couldn't quite suppress ruined the effect.

Strangely, she liked hearing it. Maybe more than she should have. There was something comforting about being included so casually in his plans, as though her being there was simply assumed. Xian had spent so much of her life watching people come and go that she had learned not to expect permanence from anyone. Caelan had reinforced that lesson in the cruelest way possible. Yet sitting here with Jerrik, she found herself wanting to believe this didn't have to end the same way. She wanted him close. She wanted the kiss she'd already admitted to wanting, and now that everything between them was out in the open, resisting that impulse somehow felt harder rather than easier. Still, the fear remained, and for once she was grateful Jerrik seemed willing to let her work through it without demanding anything from her.

"Whatever this is," she echoed, following his gesture between them before smiling softly. Friendship didn't seem like quite the right word anymore, but she wasn't ready to reach for another one. "I think I'm okay with not knowing yet." Her black eyes lingered on his for a few seconds. "I know I want you here. You want me here. Maybe that's enough until we figure out the rest." It was a much simpler way of looking at things, and the more she thought about it, the more comfortable she became with it. Nothing had to change tonight simply because they'd finally admitted something already growing between them.

"And thank you." Xian glanced down at the console, tracing one finger absently along its edge before looking at him again. "For not making me feel like I have to decide right now." A small laugh escaped her. "I was doing perfectly fine when I could pretend none of this was happening." The humor faded into something warmer. "But I don't want to pretend anymore either." That admission was almost as frightening as the first one, though this time she managed not to look away. "I just want to see where it goes."

Her gaze eventually returned to the navigation display, the countdown toward Coruscant steadily decreasing while the blue currents of hyperspace continued beyond the viewport. "And since you're apparently already prepared, that leaves me." She glanced down at herself before giving a small shrug. There wasn't much she needed either. "I suppose I should decide whether I'm actually bringing anything." Her eyes returned to Jerrik, and a playful little smile finally broke through the lingering awkwardness. "You picked the planet. I'm choosing what we do when we get there. That still seems fair."

Jerrik Molten

 

[Jerrik Molten]

The moment Xian responded about what Jerrik thought proper belongings were, he couldn’t help but to laugh for a moment. Not because it was funny, but because Jerrik genuinely thought it to be true. He didn’t need to bring anything with him, only as long as Xian would be there with him. Her presence always brought the best out of him, even when they were facing near death together. "Am I wrong, though? I don’t need anything else to make me happy, when I already have it right here in front of me." He smiled warmly after speaking, while settling back into the seat.

After hearing Xian want the same thing as him, Jerrik looked back over to her with that same warm smile. "That is more than enough. Let’s just have some fun tonight and try not to get in any trouble because of me, okay?" His tone was playful, yet Jerrik meant every word that he said. It was important to him that they both let loose a little bit because of everything they have been through without ever taking a real break from it all. The stress would ultimately build up in the end if they never took a break. In their line of work a break was much needed to snap away from the repetitive lifestyle. Credits could always wait to be obtained again, especially when Xian and Jerrik just returned from a big cash in.

When Jerrik thought the conversation would drift into another subject, Xian began to thank him for not making her decide on what this was to them, but Xian was also ready to quit pretending that there wasn’t something there between them. Jerrik nodded a couple times before opening his mouth once more. "You don’t have to thank me for that. I am not the one to control others or try to change their point of view on things. And with us knowing how we feel, it is not necessary to pretend. We can always talk to one another, so I trust you more than anyone." He added, then glanced back at the navigation screen to see exactly how much time was left until they reached Coruscant.

As Xian suggested it was up to her to get ready for their little vacation, Jerrik nodded once to affirm what she said before replying playfully. "Let’s not drag around a bag of useless stuff, okay?" He chuckled after speaking, knowing how most women needed to over pack for everything, which was never a bad thing in the end, because it’s always better to be overprepared than not prepared at all. This was something Jerrik might learn after their time on Coruscant. Never know what the duo would end up getting into, especially when they didn’t really know how to slow down after all this time together.

Regardless of what Xian did to get prepared, Jerrik continued to lean back in the seat slightly and he ended up pulling out his lightsaber hilt, examining the object as if it were a new weapon to him. That was not the case. Instead, he was admiring the mere fact that he was able to fix the weapon without having any issues the first time around. Normally, Jerrik would have to take apart and reassemble the weapon several times before actually fixing the weapon. Maybe it was the fact that Xian was watching him during the process, or it was just pure luck. Either way, the young man was eyeing the weapon happily for a few minutes but looked back to the navigation screen for an update on the time of arrival.

Xian Xiao​

 

[Xian Xiao]

Xian wasn't entirely prepared for Jerrik's answer. There was something different about hearing that he cared about her and hearing him say that he already had everything he needed to be happy because she was sitting in front of him. Heat crept back into her cheeks, and for a moment she became unusually interested in the navigation controls. She still didn't quite know what to do when he said things like that. Part of her wanted to point out that people were not belongings, which had been her original argument, but that suddenly seemed like deliberately missing his point.

"No," she finally admitted, glancing back at him with a small smile. "I guess you're not wrong."

The smile remained when he warned her against bringing a bag filled with useless things. Of all the concerns Jerrik might have had about traveling with her, that was probably among the least necessary. Xian had spent too much of her life owning little more than whatever she happened to be wearing to develop much attachment to possessions. Even now, when credits weren't nearly as difficult to come by, she hadn't accumulated much. Clothes, her lightsaber, and a handful of things she'd picked up over the years were about the extent of it.

"I think you're safe," she assured him. "I don't own enough useless stuff to fill a bag." She paused, considering that before a little amusement slipped into her voice. "I'm not entirely sure I own enough useful stuff to fill one either."

There wasn't much she actually needed to do before they arrived. Coruscant wasn't some unexplored wilderness, and despite the Sith occupation, Xian wasn't planning for this to become another mission. She could take a change of clothes and whatever small necessities she had aboard the ship. Her lightsaber would remain with her, but that was hardly unusual. Everything else could stay behind. If they discovered they needed something upon arrival, they had more than enough credits to buy it.

Her gaze eventually drifted back to Jerrik, where she found him examining his lightsaber. She remembered watching him repair it, and the quiet satisfaction on his face now brought another smile to hers. For once, neither of them had an immediate problem demanding their attention. No job. No one shooting at them. No desperate need for more credits. Just Coruscant ahead and the strange new understanding between them that neither was going to pretend away anymore.

"Besides," Xian added after a moment, settling back into her own seat, "you said we're supposed to have fun and stay out of trouble. I don't think that requires much packing." Her smile grew slightly. "Although the staying out of trouble part might be a little ambitious for us."

Jerrik Molten

 

[Jerrik Molten]

Jerrik Molten listened to Xian’s every word with that same warm smile present on their face. At that moment, the young man felt more joy than ever before and that was merely because of how he let his emotions free, allowing Xian to understand exactly how he felt about her. Regardless of the woman’s past, Jerrik knew everything would fall in place with more time. For now, he didn’t want things to feel awkward, and they probably would have if Xian didn’t feel similar.

As Xian finished speaking about them trying to stay out of trouble, Jerrik couldn’t help but to laugh at the comment. He knew damn well that trouble would be nearly impossible to evade, but at least the young man would have Xian by his side the entire time. "The trouble we cause is enough weight on our shoulders. It’s nothing we can’t handle. Besides, trouble can be fun." He shot Xian another playful wink, before his attention snapped back to the navigation screen,

There was still some time left before they would land on Coruscant, and Jerrik was beginning to feel a little restless just sitting around, so he quickly spun the chair sideways and looked directly at Xian with a warm smile. "Plus, trouble keeps us on our toes, and it is what brought us together. " He finished speaking, looking directly into the black eyes across from him. For a moment, Jerrik felt the urge to pull Xian close, but he couldn’t help but to resist the feeling that struck him so suddenly.

Before Xian could even react or respond, Jerrik began to feel the nervousness rush through him, but he instantly started to ramble on like a kid. "And to be honest, I can hold off one day on trying to start any sort of trouble, especially when it’s just you and me with no work. What can go wrong?" He teased, but continued to stare down Xian, as if she was the most beautiful woman in the galaxy. In his mind, she was and there was nothing changing the way he felt. It was a deep connection, one that he never thought could exist.

Xian Xiao​

 

[Xian Xiao]

"Trouble can be fun when nobody is trying to kill us," Xian corrected, though the smile pulling at her lips made the objection considerably less convincing. Jerrik wasn't wrong about the rest of it. Trouble had brought them together, and somehow it had kept them together through jobs that went wrong, plans that became increasingly questionable, and more close calls than either of them probably cared to count. Somewhere in the middle of all of that, he'd become the person she expected to find beside her when everything went wrong. She hadn't noticed when that expectation had turned into wanting him there even when nothing was wrong.

His next words earned an immediate look from her. "Why would you say that? You know something is going to go wrong now." A soft laugh escaped her as she stared at him like he'd just personally invited disaster aboard the ship, but the amusement slowly faded when she realized Jerrik was still looking at her. Xian had caught him watching her before, but now she knew what was behind it. There was no comfortable excuse left that allowed her to pretend his attention meant nothing, especially after everything they'd just admitted to each other. The warmth in his expression made something tighten pleasantly in her chest, and suddenly she was acutely aware of how little space actually separated them.

She had told him that she wanted to kiss him. Saying it had been terrifying enough, but sitting here afterward, with his eyes fixed upon hers and nothing dangerous or urgent available to distract either of them, was somehow worse because she still wanted to. More than she had when she'd admitted it. Her black eyes dropped to his mouth almost without permission before quickly returning to his, and heat climbed into her cheeks. This time, Xian didn't turn away to hide it. She could remember Caelan's kiss with painful clarity, the warmth of something new and the innocent certainty that there would be another chance. Then there hadn't been. For so long, memory had taught her to pull back whenever caring felt dangerous, yet looking at Jerrik now, Xian realized she didn't want fear to make this choice for her.

She shifted toward him before she could think better of it, closing some of the space between their chairs. It wasn't enough to touch him, but it was enough that the possibility suddenly felt very real. Her heart was beating harder than it had any right to while they were sitting perfectly safe aboard their ship. She wanted him closer. She wanted to know what it would feel like if the distance disappeared entirely, and more frighteningly, she wanted to let herself have that without immediately imagining how much it could hurt to lose him afterward. "You know," she murmured, her voice coming out softer than she'd intended, "you're making the whole taking-this-slow thing really difficult."

Xian's gaze betrayed her again, slipping down to his lips for a heartbeat before meeting his eyes. She could have leaned back, laughed it away, and returned her attention to the navigation display. Instead, she stayed exactly where she was, close enough now that she was painfully aware of the choice she was making by not retreating. "I already told you I want to kiss you, Jerrik, and then you sit there telling me I'm all you need to be happy and look at me like..." She faltered, unable to find words for whatever she saw in his expression, and gave a tiny shake of her head as a nervous smile touched her lips. "You're not exactly making me want it less."

For another moment, she simply looked at him, desire and nervousness tangled so thoroughly together that Xian couldn't have separated one from the other. She still didn't cross that final distance, but there was very little uncertainty left in what she wanted. She wasn't retreating from him, nor was she hiding behind Caelan's memory this time. Her voice was quiet when she finally added, "And no, before you misunderstand me, I'm not asking you to stop."

Jerrik Molten

 

[Jerrik Molten]

Jerrik continued to smile regardless of the emotions that ran rampant within, but he never lost his composure because of Xian being in his presence. She was the anchor that held this relationship together, the glue that kept the team in check, while remaining composed throughout any situation put in front of them. But the moment the woman brought up how trouble is only fun when they aren’t trying to be killed, it caused Jerrik Molten to chuckle slightly with his eyes still focused on Xian’s. "You have to admit, during those moments there is such a great feeling that sweeps over you. The adrenaline, excitement, even fear. It produces such a feeling I enjoy very much." He replied softly, yet in a firm tone.

Everything seemed fine in the moment for Jerrik. His chair was now twisted so that he was facing Xian, while gazing into their black eyes, wondering what exactly was on their mind. Something about her was always luring him in, regardless of the purpose and that it was not intentional at first, but it certainly bloomed into something that Jerrik would never regret. It was the sound of her voice that pulled him back to reality. Xian stated that he was not making it easy to take things slow, which he knew was true from the start. This was something that was impossible to resist, so he placed both hands on both of Xian’s upper knees, pulling their seat closer to him. "Well, I never said this would be easy." He responded, while looking at her warmly.

At that very moment, Jerrik wanted to pull her in, but he waited until Xian finished speaking before saying anything. "Shut up and kiss me already." He spoke, pulling her closer once more, while pulling his hands away from Xian’s knees, and reaching up to their cheek to pull them in for their first kiss. With his lips nearing Xian’s, Jerrik knew this was the right thing to do, especially with how they were both feeling in the moment. There was no resisting it now. Jerrik wanted this more than anything, he wanted to explore this feeling, develop it into something even more. But that would take time, something the young man had a lot of.

After their lips touched softly, Jerrik didn’t want to stop. Instead, he continued to kiss Xian passionately, while nearly falling out of their seat in the process of it all. And with things getting a bit steamy, so did the viewport that continued to show the blueness of Hyperspace. Regardless of what was happening, Jerrik felt something in the pit of their stomach nearly melt, yet it was like a flock of butterflies trying to lift the young man from his seat. It was new, yet it felt like something Jerrik could live with the rest of their life.

Xian Xiao​

 

[Xian Xiao]

Whatever Xian might have said about Jerrik's unusual appreciation for nearly getting themselves killed disappeared when his hands settled on her knees and drew her closer. Her breath caught, but she didn't retreat. She had already been leaning toward him, already fighting the increasingly difficult temptation to close what little distance remained between them. Now there was hardly any left. Her black eyes stayed on his, warmth spreading through her chest as nervous anticipation tangled with something much simpler. She wanted him to kiss her. She had wanted it before she'd ever found the courage to admit it aloud, and with Jerrik this close, she wasn't certain she could wait much longer.

Apparently, neither could he. His command startled a breath of laughter from her, and Xian had barely begun leaning forward when his hand touched her cheek and his lips met hers. Surprise lasted no more than a heartbeat before her eyes closed and she melted into the kiss, one hand rising naturally to rest against his shoulder. Her fingers curled gently there as she leaned closer, returning the kiss without any of the hesitation that had kept her from initiating it moments earlier. There was warmth in it, but there was also all the affection she'd struggled to put into words. Times of trusting him, laughing with him, arguing with him, surviving beside him, and gradually finding herself wanting him near even when there was no reason she needed him to be.

When Jerrik deepened the kiss, Xian followed willingly. Her hand remained on his shoulder as she drew herself closer, no longer thinking about whether this was moving too quickly or what she was supposed to do next. The fear she'd carried since losing Caelan hadn't vanished, but for once it felt distant rather than waiting between them. Jerrik wasn't a promise about tomorrow that she needed to understand or protect herself from. He was here now, kissing her, and Xian let herself enjoy how wonderfully simple that felt. She had spent so much time worrying about what caring for him might eventually cost that she'd almost forgotten there could be happiness in allowing herself to care at all.

When they finally parted, Xian stayed close enough to feel his breath against her, her hand still resting comfortably on his shoulder. Her cheeks were warm, and her heart was racing, but the smile that slowly appeared wasn't nervous anymore. It was soft and almost a little amazed, as though she'd spent so long imagining this moment that actually being in it hadn't quite caught up with her yet. She looked into his eyes for several quiet seconds, taking in the warmth of his hand against her cheek and the unfamiliar happiness settling through her.

"I was about to do that," she whispered, the words carrying no complaint at all. If anything, the admission made her smile deepen as her thumb moved absently against his shoulder. Xian didn't give either of them much time to answer. This time she was the one who leaned in, closing the distance and kissing him again because she wanted to, with nothing left to confess and no reason left to hold herself back.

Jerrik Molten

 

[Jerrik Molten]

Once Jerrik pulled away slowly, with his right hand still placed gently on Xian’s cheek, he continued to stare down at her with the smile gone, a look of something more, the look of a man who was falling for the woman in front of him. But he managed to speak through all the emotions that stirred within. "I have dreamt of that kiss for so damn long. And even that dream couldn’t compare to this." He admitted with a hint of lost breath from the kiss moments ago. Jerrik didn’t want to stop, but with little time remaining until they arrived at Coruscant, it made him resist that urge for the sake of what was planned.

As the young man pulled his hand away from Xian’s cheek, he then rested it upon the hand of Xian’s that was on his shoulder. "Let’s get ready for Coruscant. I am rather excited to see what you have planned for us first." He added, while slouching down in the chair and keeping their gaze on Xian. There was still so much to explore between them both, but they were almost to their destination, so learning more of what this was would have to wait a short while. Regardless, Jerrik knew what he wanted and would be patient through it all.

The navigation system began to beep loudly, alerting the duo that they were nearly at Coruscant. Jerrik glanced at the nav system for a moment, then put his attention back on Xian. "Well, we are much closer than I expected. I also brought some extra credits just in case we want to have a bit more fun than planned." He smiled wide, patting his chest where the small bag of credits was stored within the tunic Jerrik was wearing. It was never a bad idea to bring along more credits than needed, especially with how Xian and Jerrik love to cause chaos wherever they go, even if it is not on purpose.

Jerrik shifted in the seat, turning it back to its normal position for the time being. The more professional side of the young man was showing, yet his version of professional was nothing like Xian’s version. "And once we get settled in, we can discuss us more." He pointed to Xian, then to himself after speaking to suggest that he was talking about what kind of relationship this was going to be as of now. There was no need to rush things, but there was also every reason in the galaxy to go fast. He wouldn’t dwell on the thought too much, because he was more worried about what Xian had in store for their first little vacation.

Xian Xiao​

 

[Xian Xiao]

Xian's smile softened at Jerrik's admission, and for a few seconds she didn't seem particularly interested in Coruscant, navigation warnings, or anything else beyond the man sitting in front of her. The warmth of his hand still lingered against her cheek, and when he covered the hand she'd left resting on his shoulder, her fingers shifted beneath his almost instinctively. She hadn't known he'd been thinking about kissing her for that long. Somehow, knowing that made the warmth already settled inside her spread a little further. "I've thought about it too," she admitted quietly. Maybe not in dreams she could remember, but enough times recently that she'd stopped being able to pretend the desire wasn't there. Her smile deepened as her eyes remained on his. "I'm glad the real thing was better."

The navigation alert finally pulled her attention toward the viewport, and Xian reluctantly let her hand slip from his shoulder as Jerrik turned back toward the controls. Coruscant was close now, and she tried to pull her thoughts together enough to remember that she'd claimed the right to decide what they did once they arrived. "Extra credits aren't a bad idea, but we're supposed to be taking a break, remember? We don't need to spend a fortune to have fun." Her childhood on Coruscant had taught her that better than most things. Credits opened doors, certainly, but some of her strongest memories of the planet had been formed when she'd barely possessed any at all. Going back now with Jerrik beside her and enough money that she didn't have to worry about her next meal already made the experience completely different.

"I thought we could start somewhere I actually know," she continued, settling properly into her seat as the ship prepared to leave hyperspace. "Get something good to eat, walk around the markets, maybe show you a few places from when I lived there. After that..." Xian gave a small shrug and looked toward him again. "We don't have a job waiting for us. We can decide when we get there." The lack of a plan would normally have bothered her more, but this time it felt strangely freeing. There was nowhere they had to be and nobody waiting for them to accomplish something. For once, they could simply enjoy being together.

When Jerrik pointed between them and mentioned discussing us, Xian's expression warmed all over again. Only a short time ago, that conversation had frightened her enough that she'd struggled to explain what she felt at all. Now she could still feel his kiss on her lips, and whatever uncertainty remained didn't feel nearly as intimidating. "I'd like that," she said softly. Her black eyes lingered on him for another moment before she turned toward the approaching planet. She didn't know what name they would eventually give this or exactly what came next, but she no longer felt any urge to pretend it wasn't happening. "But first, let's see if we can make it through one evening on Coruscant without accidentally finding a job, getting shot at, or making somebody angry with us." A quiet laugh escaped her. "That might be enough of a challenge."

Jerrik Molten

 

[Jerrik Molten]

The thought of Xian’s lips on his never left Jerrik’s mind the whole time they continued to speak. It was something that would stay with him for life, something that meant more to him than Xian would know. Regardless of his feelings, which continued to rise every second he was next to her, Jerrik tried to remain focused on their departure from hyperspace. "All right, Captain, let’s see how good your skills with a ship are from here." He said jokingly, because Jerrik knew all too well that Xian was a skilled pilot, especially since she was the main one to fly on their missions.

Jerrik couldn’t help but to chuckle at Xian’s comment on them staying out of trouble. He didn’t say anything at first. Instead, he looked at the woman and smiled warmly once more. "I am pretty sure we can last one night without any trouble following us." The sound of Jerrik’s voice confirmed the fact that what he was saying was likely false. With his anger issues and need for a fight, it was likely that they end up on the run from some sort of pirates or even find a way to get the law's attention. Regardless, Jerrik wouldn’t want to do those things without Xian at his side.

As the ship finally exited hyperspace, Jerrik tucked himself into the seat comfortably, while also preparing for Xian to zoom off without any type of warning. "And here we go. The start of something new." He said in a calm voice, while making sure everything needed for the trip was stashed away safely. There was still time left until they landed, but Jerrik wanted to make sure he had everything because there would be no reason to turn around and come back halfway through their trip. And with a final pat down of his tunic, Jerrik let a sigh of relief escape their lips, while settling into the chair, thinking about the kiss Xian and himself shared minutes ago.

While they both watched as Coruscant was now in their view, Jerrik glanced over at Xian, then turned his attention back to the planet lurking in front of them through the viewport. "I have always dreamed of being a Jedi, but that dream was turned into a nightmare as a kid. At first, I couldn’t comprehend it, then I learned quickly how they seclude you from the world, from teachings, and even love. This place shares a memory with me when I was just initiated into the order as a youngling. Like I said, I was young and only remember the bad memories." He spoke, breaking the silence for the time being, bringing up a memory that has haunted him for so long.

Xian Xiao​

 

[Xian Xiao]

Xian's attention remained on the approaching planet as Jerrik spoke, though her expression softened at the change in his voice. Coruscant carried very different memories for each of them. For Jerrik, it was tangled up with the beginning of something he'd dreamed about becoming and the disappointment that followed. For Xian, the Jedi had come later. The endless city filling the viewport had simply been home first, with all the good and bad that came with it.

"When the Jedi found me, I thought it was going to be different too," she admitted quietly. "I didn't dream about becoming one before that. I didn't even really understand what being a Jedi meant. Then suddenly someone was telling me I could be one." She adjusted their approach as she spoke, hands moving easily over the controls while Coruscant grew larger ahead of them. "The problem was that I couldn't keep a Master. Someone would start teaching me, then they'd be gone, and eventually there would be someone else. After a while, I stopped believing any of them were actually going to stay long enough to finish."

There wasn't much bitterness in her voice anymore, but there was still something unresolved beneath the words. Xian had spent years trying to make herself fit into a future other people kept telling her she was supposed to want. Eventually, leaving had seemed easier than continuing to wait for someone else to decide what came next. "So I left. I went back to Castell for a while. That's actually where I was born, even though Coruscant is the place I remember growing up." Her black eyes flicked briefly toward Jerrik before returning to their approach. "I suppose neither of us ended up becoming what the Jedi expected us to be."

A small smile touched her lips as she glanced at him again. After the kiss they'd shared, the thought carried a warmth it wouldn't have possessed even an hour earlier. "I'm not sure that's a bad thing anymore." Her gaze lingered on him for a moment before she returned her attention to the planet ahead. "You found your own way after Kashyyyk and the Jedi. I found mine after Coruscant, Castell, and all the Masters who didn't stay. Somehow those ways ended up crossing." The smile grew just a little. "I think I like where mine ended up."
:::

Jerrik Molten

 

[Jerrik Molten]

Jerrik Molten sat in the chair comfortably, listening to everything Xian was saying about her past. It was obvious both of them had very similar stories, yet Jerrik was unable to let the past stay where it belonged. It always haunted him, causing the young man to dwell on the bad memories because they outweighed the good by so much. Even talking about it brought out the anger within. He didn’t show it because Xian was there with him. Her words, the way she spoke, even the way she presented herself, it was enough to calm the anger that resided within Jerrik, even at the worst of times. "You make it easier to cope with everything, Xi, I will admit that. I always wanted to become a Jedi, feel accepted with others, but that was never the case with me. Nobody sticks around; I am even surprised you are still here." He admitted sheepishly.

There was a short silence between the two of them, before Jerrik finally looked over at Xian with that same smile that seemed to warm up the room. "Kashyyyk, that reminds me. I owe a good friend a visit at some point, we will have to make a stop on our way back through. It’ll be worth it, trust me this time." He gave Xian a playful wink as he finished speaking, then put his attention back on the navigation system. Coruscant was only a few minutes out, yet Jerrik felt like he could spend eternity in the cockpit with Xian. Something about her always brightened his day, even when there was nothing to be happy about, besides her presence. It was alluring and made the young man want to never leave her side.

It was extremely crazy to see how Jerrik’s attitude shifted from sadness, to being happy within the matter of minutes. Xian was the reason for that and there was a part of him that thought she had no idea about it, but it was also something Jerrik never really brought up much. "I love where life has brought me. I will never regret what I have now, nor should I dwell on the what-ifs. It guided me to you, what more can I ask for?" He added, while glancing back at Xian for a few short seconds, before turning his attention to the viewport once more. There was a vast galaxy right in front of him, just waiting for the right time to reach the right destination to finally call home. But for now, Coruscant would be the hotel they needed for the time being.

Xian Xiao​

 

[Xian Xiao]

Xian's hands slowed briefly over the controls when Jerrik admitted he was surprised she was still there. Of everything he'd said, that was the part that stayed with her. She understood where the expectation came from because some version of it lived inside her too. People left. Masters disappeared, homes stopped being homes, and sometimes people died before you were ready to lose them. It made it difficult to expect permanence, even when you desperately wanted something to last. "I'm still here," she said softly, glancing toward him. "And I don't have any plans to disappear." She couldn't promise him forever or guarantee that the galaxy wouldn't interfere, but she could promise the part that belonged to her. "You're kind of stuck with me until I decide otherwise, Jerrik."

His mention of Kashyyyk earned a more suspicious look. "You know, saying trust me this time doesn't make me trust you more, right?" There was humor behind the words, though, and Xian didn't object to the idea. They rarely needed much of an excuse to change course after a job, and visiting someone important to Jerrik seemed like a better reason than most. "But okay. Kashyyyk on the way back. I want to meet this friend of yours." She smiled before turning her attention forward again, only for his next words to draw her eyes back to him.

The warmth in his expression made it difficult not to remember the kiss they'd shared only minutes earlier, and his declaration that everything had guided him to her brought color back into her cheeks. Xian wasn't sure she could look at the disappointments in her own life quite the same way. There were still things she wished had happened differently and people she wished she'd never lost. But Jerrik was right about one thing. Somehow, all of those turns had eventually put them on the same path. "You really need to stop saying things like that when I'm trying to fly," she murmured, although the smile spreading across her face made it obvious she didn't actually want him to stop. "I'm supposed to be paying attention."

As if Coruscant itself had decided to reinforce the point, the communications console chimed before she could say anything more. Xian reached over and opened the channel, and a burst of static gave way to the clipped voice of Coruscant flight control requesting their identification and approach information. She transmitted the ship's registration and waited while their course was processed. A few moments later, the controller returned with clearance and directed them toward an assigned landing pad in one of the lower commercial districts, feeding the coordinates directly into their navigation system.

"Coruscant Control, received. We'll follow the assigned approach. Thank you." Xian closed the channel and adjusted their heading, guiding the ship into the endless streams of traffic surrounding the planet. Familiar layers of towers and moving lights gradually resolved beneath them as they descended, and for a moment she found herself staring at the world that had once seemed like her entire universe. This time, she wasn't arriving as the orphan who'd grown up there or the girl the Jedi had taken away. She was coming back because she had chosen to, with Jerrik beside her and no mission determining what happened next.

Her smile returned as she glanced at him. "There. Landing clearance, no one shooting at us, and we haven't even made anyone angry yet." Xian settled their ship into the designated traffic lane and started bringing them toward the assigned pad. "We're doing really well so far."

Jerrik Molten

 

[Jerrik Molten]

The reassurance was nice, especially since that was something that Jerrik never experienced growing up. The jedi master's would try their best to make him feel accepted, but they always left him in the end, whether it was on purpose or from a sudden death, it felt like everyone around him would always end up leaving. But something about Xian was different. It was pure. The way she spoke, Jerrik could sense the sincerity in their voice, along with how she always stuck around, even when he was pushing her away. It caused him to smile and settle back into the chair without saying a word. She calmed him and that is what felt most important.

Seeing that Xian was nearly as excited as Jerrik about Kashyyyk, he couldn’t help but to let that smile continue to shine. "He is a mentor of mine, someone who actually stood by me when I was a teenager. But how the tables turn. I was the one who left him unexpectedly. So, we will see how that goes." He admitted to Xian, glancing over at her once before settling his gaze on the viewport once more. For now, Kashyyyk would have to wait because Coruscant was right in front of them and both Xian and Jerrik deserve some down time, especially after their near-death experience on the last job they took.

Just as Jerrik could see that Xian was flustered with how he responded to their question, he began to chuckle at the response she made in return. "Oh, come on. It’s not like you can’t put that thing on autopilot, then we jump in the back of this ship, and..well, yeah." He added quickly, while turning a bit red himself. The kiss was enough to take his breath away, so he couldn’t even imagine how he would feel if things went further than that. But he had to stop thinking about that, so Jerrik managed to close out some of the warnings on the navigation system, alerting them that they were heading into a traffic zone to enter the planet’s orbit.

The moment the static overcame the systems on the ship, Jerrik flinched in their seat, then quickly leaned forward to see what the problem was. But before he could even investigate, a voice came over the radio that wanted to know their identification, and approach information. Xian was in command, reaching forward to give the security the information they needed over the comm system. It was a relief, knowing that they were able to land on Coruscant with no issues at all. This was a first and Jerrik was rather surprised since he did have some contraband in the back without Xian’s knowledge. Just a side mission to their little vacation, that’s all.

When Xian glanced over at Jerrik and reminded him how nothing has gone wrong yet, he let out another laugh before looking back at her. "Keyword in that sentence is yet. Meaning, we have a whole day and night to get into some trouble. Who knows, maybe I will find a nice sabacc table to gamble away my last credits. Who knows, right?" He responded and winked playfully once more, giving Xian many things to think about for the time being. He surely wasn’t being serious, but knowing Jerrik and how he works, things can take a swift turn at any moment.

Xian Xiao​

 

[Xian Xiao]

Xian gave Jerrik a sidelong look at the suggestion of putting the ship on autopilot and disappearing into the back with him. The color that had only just begun fading from her cheeks returned almost immediately. She understood exactly what he'd left unsaid, which was somehow worse than if he'd actually finished the sentence. Her black eyes stayed on him for a moment before she deliberately returned them to the traffic ahead. "No," she said, though there was far too much amusement and warmth in her voice for it to sound particularly stern. "I am landing the ship and then we are going on an adventure."

She guided them deeper into Coruscant's traffic, slipping naturally into the ordered streams of speeders and starships while the assigned landing coordinates counted down. Jerrik's revelation about his mentor remained in the back of her thoughts, however. There was something almost strangely fitting about it. He had spent so much of his life feeling abandoned, yet there had been at least one person who stayed until Jerrik became the one to leave. "I think we should go to Kashyyyk," she said after a moment. "Even if it's awkward. Especially if you left without saying anything." Her expression softened when she glanced toward him. "Maybe he wondered what happened to you. You know better than most what that's like."

The sabacc comment earned a much less sympathetic expression. "If you gamble away your last credits, I'm not giving you mine." Xian paused, then reconsidered with a tiny frown because they both knew she probably wouldn't actually leave him penniless. "Fine. I'm not giving you mine so you can gamble them away too." That was a boundary she could realistically maintain. She adjusted their descent as the landing platform appeared among the surrounding buildings, following the guidance lights toward it. "We're getting food first anyway. If you insist on losing credits after that, at least neither of us will be doing it hungry."

The ship settled toward the platform under Xian's control, repulsors taking its weight before the landing gear made contact. She worked through the shutdown sequence, watching the displays change one after another until the engines dropped to a low hum and finally quieted. Only then did she lean back and look toward Jerrik. For the first time since they'd begun their descent, there was nothing left requiring her attention. Coruscant waited beyond the ship, and so did an entire day in which neither of them had anywhere they were required to be.

"Okay." Her gaze remained on him, and the smile that appeared carried some of the same warmth she'd had after kissing him. "We're here." Xian unfastened her restraints and rose, gathering the few things she actually needed before looking back at him. "Food, markets, absolutely no jobs, and preferably no one shooting at us." She started toward the exit before adding, "And if we somehow end up running from Coruscant Security before dinner, I'm blaming you."

Jerrik Molten