Wake Up

[Soliath Devin Talith]

Soliael simply held her.

He didn't need her to say anything back to him, just knowing that she listened, just seeing on her face that she at least somewhat understood what he was trying to say was enough. Part of her still didn't get it, perhaps she needed more time think to process. He didn't know, but he would remain silent on the subject.

They still held one another, tightly pressed against each other.

He didn't think that she noticed, not that they were this close together. He was still half above the water, simply standing there while she cried. Slowly the tears fell away, and her face turned upward into an attempted smile. Soliael looked down at her, returning the same warm smile, one that showed empathy beyond all doubt.

“Better than throwing me to the ground.” He smiled at her, intoning that it was of course a joke, a reference to Metalorn, where they had first met. Slowly Soliael dropped them into the water. Heat enclosed them, and since Soliael still held on to Kira, holding her up, he kept her head above water.

Soliael landed on the outer edges of the bath tub, completely submerged up to his neck. He made sure Kira stayed close to him, submerging her entirely in the hot water of the bath in an attempt to get her to relax.

If she wanted, they wold speak more later.

 

[Kira Talith]

Kira couldn't help it, she burst into laughter. With the water now nearly to her chin, her short breaths of awkward amusement would send ripples across the surface.

"Will you ever let me live that down?" she'd joke in turn, wiping her eyes in a manner that made it seem she was trying to avoid his gaze. Her hair sank and floated around her, beads of water trailing down her cheeks, mingling with her tears. She was calmer now, at least, had a firmer grasp at her emotions. She wouldn't cry anymore. Had to keep up that lower lip.

The water certainly felt heavenly, and there was just a relief at getting all the blood and grime away. No one woke up in the morning wanting to be dusted with animal excrement. Aches and pains were slowly being soaked away, but the longer he held her, the more aware of her position and of his embrace she became.

"Careful... you don't want to end up pulling one of those scabs," the Jedi Master would say in concern, drawing the focus back to his own wounds. If they could change topics to one that was was more familiar, a bit more comfortable with, and that would make sense, maybe she wouldn't be so confused anymore.

"You won't smell pretty, but a thorough soaking in a bacta tank will do you wonders there, gramps."

 

[Soliath Devin Talith]

“Not until you properly apologize.” Soliel said the words as if they were final, then quickly switched topics to something else, catching her want to change topics. He wasn't completely dead when it came to social cues, and he knew what Kira desired right now, though oddly enough, he still refused to let her go.

“Bacta tanks have never worked great for me.” Soliael said with a careful shrug.

He was once again telling the truth of course. Bacta for him wasn't much more than a salve. It aided his healing to be sure, but it wasn't the miracle drug that it was for others. He suspected it was due to the wide mix of species that had gone into him, or the fact that his dominant line was Garhoon, a species whose cells reacted differently to stimuli.

Blood would heal him, he knew that.

Yet there was no way he would tell Kira, no way he would ask her.

“Give me a few days.” He said with a grin. “Maybe a patch or two, some good company, I'll be right as rain”

That was a bit of an exaggeration, without the darkside he would likely take weeks to heal, even with that neat little trick that she had showed him. The thought jerked his mind back to their connection, the bridge that Kira had forged between the two of them. His face twisted into a hint of confusion and curiosity, his eyes telling the story of thought.

 

[Kira Talith]

It was getting easier now, and Soliael was picking up on her cues. Kira could appreciate that. Her eyes would drift over his collar bone, following the line over towards the mars of scars. Slowly, as one to constantly keep her hands busy, the Lorrdian would take that washcloth she'd just about squeezed to near death and bring it up to his shoulder. Carefully, while still avoiding his gaze, she'd start to gently dab around his wounds, just enough to wipe away what she could without harming the scabs.

"Maybe if you stayed the required amount of time, they would." she'd say, shoulders rising a bit in a half forced half heh. "You don't seem to be the sort to follow a medics orders." Well that was putting it lightly. The wash cloth would start to drift over his collarbone, towards his neck. She was able to read the growing tension, not due to awkwardness, but again to curiosity -- confusion.

Blue eyes would rise to catch his expression, the searching in his gaze.

Her shoulders would drop as she gave a deep exhale. Ohhh boy, she mused to herself. Okay, she could do this. It was getting easier now, although the heat in her cheeks was still a combination of her embarrassment, the steam, and that awareness she was trying to push away. You got more bang than that Kira Beans! Ah, some pep talk. Force, did she really turn into a watering pot?

Enter a mental groan.

"Well, you clearly have something in your mind," she'd say. "A cookie for your thoughts?"

 

[Soliath Devin Talith]

Soliael caught her eyes for only a brief moment, still seeing the embarrassment that played across her face. Was it because he had kissed her? Or was it because of her reaction to the kiss? The Former Sith Lord eyed her for a moment more. He wanted to tilt her head up, he wanted to see her face, see her smile and catch the joy within her eyes.

He smiled at her.

“It depends on whose the Nurse.” Soliael said the words smoothly, still holding her as she began to wash him.

It felt nice.

Truth be told he had felt this before, servants and other women washing him. This time however it was different. Kira wasn't doing it out of some obligation or sexual desire. She was doing it because...because she was Kira. Even within his own mind Soliael found it difficult to explain, something that amused him to no end.

“The cave.” He said suddenly. “It...you...our minds. They met, merged...”

He sounded awkward, almost embarrassed.

 

[Kira Talith]

The sound of trickling water and the gentle sweep of the washcloth would continue, much in the same manner a mother would tend to her child. However, it certainly wasn't Quietus who was being held against Soliael in such an intimate manner. There it was again. That awareness. That fuzzy feeling was back.

Good thing he mentioned the meld.

Her teeth would nibble over the fullness of her lower lip. In her mind, she could recall the series of odd images and flashes of memories that were not her own. All without context. All a confusing mass of dancing shadows. Bits and pieces of what she could gather was of the man that held her within his embrace.

There came a rather awkward thinning of her lips, a worried look drifting over her expression. How to explain this to him? That she'd done so without fully disclosing just what she was doing. It had been why she'd apologized to him right before he'd accepted and dropped his mental shields.

Slowly, Kira took a deep breath, her bare shoulders bobbing on top of the water as her chest rose. "It's called a Force meld." she began to explain. "It is a way for several Jedi to act as one entity through a mental connection in the Force..." her lips twisted, realizing how that might sound.

"It's risky... but it provides a way to strengthen and coordinate together with another. In our case... so that we could focus on healing you together."

She gave him an apologetic look.

"And I'm sorry... I didn't have the time to explain it all to you before I guided us through it. But I had no choice. I couldn't heal you by myself."

 

[Soliath Devin Talith]

Soliael mulled over her words for a moment.

A Jedi Mind Meld. What an interesting concept, the idea of it was appealing. Mixing thoughts and powers among several being in order to create a single more powerful bieng. The Sith had something similar, that much he knew, but with them it was all about control, about domination, and you didn't enter ones minds, not their thoughts or memories, nothing of the sort.

With the Sith tecnique some simply took control of the persons power in the force, of their ability within the force and nothing else. Oh you could kill though the conection, but you could not access memories or anything of the sort.

That was the oddity to Soliael.

For a moment he waited, then he looked at her again, his eyes trying to catch her own, his hands drifted down to her hips to seemingly stead himself in the water, as if needed to grip something solid so he would not fall through the Marble slab he sat on.

“How much did you see?” The question was asked with a hint of trepidation.

 

[Kira Talith]

The washtowel came to a pause at his question right over his chest. How to answer that question? Her lids lowered to half-mast, her mind wondering just what exactly to say. Privacy was a big issue -- she herself had been worried about what he'd might have seen when he'd mentioned about being of Kiffar heritage. It was one thing to offer that information freely.

Quite another when it was taken without prior consent or foreknowledge.

The pressure at her hips would remind her of their position, indentations of fingertips pressing into remnants of bruised skin and wet fabric. She didn't wince, instead she rode the slight pain. He needed to steady himself, and after all that had happened in the caverns... this was a small sacrifice for his comfort.

Another deep breath, then she'd raise her gaze anew. If anything, he had every right to know.

"Bits and pieces. Some make sense. Others do not. It is... " her brow would furrow, as if trying to find a way to explain it. "...some I can gather context. Others I can't..."

 

[Soliath Devin Talith]

Soliael looked at her for a few moments, studying with calculating eyes. There was a certain heat to them, as if embarrassment still ran through him.

“Tell me.” Soliael demanded softly.

His words would ring out in the bathroom, and his hands would loosen on her hips ever so slightly. His muscles were still tense, a little bit of shame still hanging within him. What had she seen? That was what plagued his mind, what stormed the gates of his thoughts.

“Tell me.” Another pause. “Tell me what you saw.”

Had she been to the darkest parts of his mind?

Or barely scratches the surface.

 

[Kira Talith]

He was embarrassed. It was evident by the heat in his stare, the low hush in his voice at his demand. He wanted to know. He needed to know. Kira could understand from one aspect why one would want to know the who, what, where. Knowing that another might have seen the most private of affairs. The lows. The highs. The joys. The shame.

The latter is what she could read permeate from the tension in his shoulders, from the flex of his fingers. His amber eyes would probe hers, edged in trepidation. This mattered, rightly so.

Kira's mouth would part only to close, as if unsure just what to say. Finally, she spoke. "Amore." came her murmur of a name, of a woman who was as familiar to her as she was a stranger. Vibrant red hair. Striking eyes. The affection that came along with her image was one she culd not deny -- an affection Soliael held for the woman... for.

Family.


"I know she's part of your family."

 

[Soliath Devin Talith]

Soliael waited for a moment, obviously surprised by her mentioning of Amorella. The way she abbreviated the name so naturally came as a shock. It told volumes of what had happened, just how far she had managed to dig inside of his mind and what she had managed to take with her. For a moment, the surprise showed on his face before quickly falling away.

“She is as a sister.” Soliael said quietly. “Though the actual relation is a bit more complicated than that.”

She was his great grandmothers daughter, which technically made Amorella his great aunt.

It was a very confusing family wreath they had.

One that he likely wouldn't explain to Kira unless the two of them got much closer in the end. He frowned slightly, mind wandering for a moment to try and find a memory of hers. For some strange reason, the fog was too omnipresent.

His thumbs slowly began to caress her abdomen. “What else?”

Soliaels tone was gentler this time, embarrassment hidden by curiosity.

 

[Kira Talith]

That... made more sense. Okay. So that is why there was that bit of familiarity. Kira would give a small nod, as if mulling that information a bit more, the puzzles being put into place.

"How complicated?" she couldn't help but ask, only to give a slight twitch at the sensation of his thumb drifting over her abdomen. She'd blink rapidly, shifting slightly in place. Hot water would swirl around them, and she'd dip under until the water hit her chin, prompting the slide of his fingers to about her waist.

What else?

Amore -- Amorella. Yuuzhanthan. Pillars of smoke rising into quickening grey skies. Anger. Rage. Missing. His family was missing. Death. So much death.

Flash forward to the Pit. Defending himself. The scent of blood and death. The flash of predatory eyes. The bloodlust, so eerily similar to that of the caves.

Onderon, his mother. The sound of laughter and his mothers muted smile, unspoken words that still translated so clearly in her -- his mind.

What else did she see? Many things. Many, many things.

It was clear she was struggling how to exactly convey all of this. How to tell him. "...That she... Amore." she began, only to have her eyes close shut. A frown would quickly draw over her brow, as if going through the images with a fine sieve.

So much death. A fine trembling would come to her again. It reminded her so much of Gratos.

Where was she?

"Yuuzhantar."

 

[Soliath Devin Talith]

“I have a very long lived family.” Soliael said in explanation to her.

That was really the end of it. They were old, ancient as could be really, and they never went barren in that age. So of course it ended up with multiple generations running around heralded from other generations and instead of a family one got a strange family wreath. It was odd, but quite normal to him.

Then she said it, the word.

Yuuzhan'Tar.

The word stung him, it hit him like a slap In the face, like a punch to the gut.

He winced, and his stomach seemed to turn instantly. That was the one thing that Soliael hadn't wanted her to know, the one thing that she shouldn't have seen. The extermination of a world. Granted, to Soliael and most of the Crusade it had been justified. The Yuuzhan Vong had been a threat to Moross, they had harried and attacked them, threatened them, and had been poised on the edge of Moross space for years.

Eliminating their new Homeworld had been imperative to keeping his people safe.

But would she see it that way?

“I...” He stopped speaking, wanting to say something. Desperation appeared in his eyes and he searched her for a clue as to her opion. His thumbs stopped, low on her abdomen, and despite the heat of the water he began to shake.

 

[Kira Talith]

Kira couldn't hear him, not then. No her mind was elsewhere. Fingers would curl against the wash-cloth in a knuckle white grip. Another flinch.

Words. Commands. She stood before a bridge. A mask over her face. The trembling grew stronger and her breath hitched. There would be no mercy.

Lips parted, out came the single order, in perfect mimicry, sundering from her lips as it echoed through the fleet.

“Raze it to the ground.”

 

[Soliath Devin Talith]

That stung him.

Like a bee jabbing him in the throat Soliael felt the hit. He winced again, but didn't know what to say. Was she mocking him? Making fun of him? Trying to bring down his spirits more than they already were? No.

No.

She was entranced, enthralled, taken by memories that were not at all her own. Soliael looked at her, desperately staring, his hands frozen in place on her hips.

 

[Kira Talith]

More scenes would flash behind her eyes. Fast forward.

The Yammsok. The change. The Techno--

--virus began to change the creature, its flesh peeling, its veins and arteries changing, its entire mindset become warped and twisted. Organic flesh soon became synthetic, and as it became enthralled to the gods of Moross Soliael could begin to feel the vast connection that Yammosk held over the Yuuzhan Vong.

He marveled for a moment, then his eyes drifted towards the fleet in the viewport.

A smile crossed his face.

“Destroy them all.” It was a verbal command, but one that the Yammsok understood. The vast Flagship of the Remaining Yuuzhan Vong fleet turned its Plasma guns on its own allies, and soon the space above Yuuzhan'tar began to burn.

It was only the beginning.

Shock would snap her eyes open. Horror and disbelief would reflect in her blue eyes, unable to help the sudden jerking back from his arms. She felt nauseous, lightheaded. And she just couldn't get past the wanton genocide of an entire species.

"You... you..." her voice would crack, and she'd take another step away. Then another. What he did. How he did it... It was.. It was... Tears would smart her eyes. This didn't make sense. How could he...

Ahh, but it did.

It had been, after-all Neth The Keeper who brought brimstone and death to an entire world.

 

[Soliath Devin Talith]

Soliaels face shifted to sadness, depression even, but no regret.

He did not look regretful, and indeed he felt no such emotions for anything he had done, no matter how horrible. He had known back then what he was doing, and he had known back then that it had been the right thing to do. He still knew that. Soliael didn't expect Kira to understand, she was a Jedi, the sanctity of life was paramount to her.

But when a Horde stood knocking at your door, you didn't wait for it to come to you.

You didn't wait for it to grow and fester, you didn't wait for it to strike, you struck first. There had been no innocents on Yuuzhan'Tar, no children, no women, no one upon that world had been without fault. It had been a planet of death, a planet of destruction.

“It was war.” Soliael said as his hands closed around her phantom form. “They called themselves The Horde.”

He began to explain, his eyes cast down towards his hands. “They were a faction made for war, a group that cared for expansion, blood, and genocide. They cropped up on Yuuzhan'Tar first. The rebirth of their kind. From their they spread like an infestation. Morje, Aurum, Echidna...even the Silken Asteroids. They spread, they slaughtered, entire planets were wiped out in days. Countless billions Kira.” His voice was strained, but again, honesty rang through it. “Then they came for us.”

That shake ran through him again, he wanted so desperately for her to listen, for her to believe.

“They came to our borders, threatened our people, told of us of our destruction. They were about to strike.” He paused. “So we struck first.”

His voice became slightly shaky, there was still no hint of regret, only desperation. “We broke them Kira. We broke them in a matter of weeks. Like an exalted march we tore through the Horde day after day, fight after fight, until finally, all that was left was that world. The Yuuzhan Vong held no innocents, they had no sinless children, no defenseless women, no unbloodied men. Yuuzhan'Tar was a world made for war, for nothing but blood and death. The Yuuzhan Vong didn't care for culture, for peace, for talking. They were alive to kill, to carve the galaxies face into what they saw fit.”

Soliaels eyes cast up finally, looking at Kira.

“You have to understand Kira, I wasn't smiling because I was wiping out a species. I was smiling because I was halting a rolling tide of death.” The truth clung to those words as tightly as they could.

His gaze became firm. "I would do it again. For Amore, for them. I will protect them. No matter the rents in my soul."

 

[Kira Talith]

How oddly that rang true. How familiar. Yet its familiarity did not dull the images nor the cacophony of ghostly screams she heard in her ears. Her body would half turn away from him, arms wrapping round herself as if to shelter. Her eyes were shut tight, and she was struggling to steady her breathing along with the vertigo that would threaten to overwhelm her.

She didn't know what was worse. Memories of a genocide that were not her own... or the ones she carried herself?

Blood. It was everywhere. The screams were just... Kira stood on top of the ramp, unable to move, frozen in place. The whole scene was staggering, enough to have her fall on her knees.

"Oh by the Force," came her low agonizing whisper. The scent of blood was everywhere. In her clothes, in her hair, just... Everywhere. Nausea hit the blonde hard, as she had sudden flashbacks of another time.

She felt herself dry-heaving a bit, one hand reaching out to slam against the durasteel wall to hold her balance. Breathe. In. Out.

Focus.

There was no time to be stuck in her own hell. The Bando Gora were worse. Much worse.

"There is peace," came her words, low and half a whisper. She got onto unsteady feet. "We are the protectors and defenders... for those who cannot protect themselves."


Gratos with the Graug, in the wake of their attempted invasion of Coruscant, the countless of padawans taken from the temple to be slaves for the Graug. The righteous fury that followed upon the Graug Shipyards thereafter. The slaves. The reeking of death and stale tang of blood.

The Omega Protectorate with the Bando Gora Reavers, with the wild savage twisted beings that would rape, murder, and eat their victims alive. Hunted down and treated like vermin to be exterminated.

She understood it. She got it. Bright blue eyes would raise, blinking rapidly as she'd stare right at him. Truth rang in Soliael's voice, in his stance. In every fiber of his being. There was no regret there.

In his mind -- as well as in her mind she saw -- he did what had to be done.

There was sadness lingering in his expression. Desperation etched upon his face. Yet no regret in the depths of his eyes.

It was just so much to process then. More so when considering this was someone else's emotions, memories, and choices floating in her head. Trembling fingers would rise, dripping water down her arms as she'd press them over her face.

 

[Soliath Devin Talith]

Soliael looked at her. He didn't know what to say, he didn't know what to do. His body ached, his head hurt, his leg seemed to be on fire. His muscles were tensed, already damage and only hurting themselves more. Soliael parted his lips, wetting them for a second, and then uttering to lone syllables.

"Kira?"

 

[Kira Talith]

The sound of her name would draw her attention, and once again, eyes the color of an arctic lake would bore into his own. The pale pink tip of her tongue would dark out, almost nervously to sweep over her dry chapped lips. She gave another shiver, despite the warmth of the water. Lips parted anew and she'd start to murmur something seemingly incomprehensible, perhaps to low for him to hear.

"First came the Bando Gora... then the Graug." her voice would be shaky, and it was evident she was still struggling with this. "Both would murder, rape, and violate so many... for no good reason than simple because. No sane possible reason..."

Her eyes would take on a sheen again.

"The Republic and the Jedi Order razed an entire world as well Soliael... to destroy the Graug." she'd swallow hard. "As did the Protectorate at the Bando Gora homeworld...


But where is the line drawn?"

It was clear this was an answer she herself had been struggling with.