Approved Location Toa's Palace

[Vee Toa(Hutt Rep)]

OUT OF CHARACTER INFORMATION

Intent: To give Vee Toa a personal Palace
Image Credit: Here
Canon: N/A
Link: Here

SETTING INFORMATION

• Structure Name: Toa's Palace
• Classification: Hideout, Structure
• Location: http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Jakku
• Affiliation: Vee Toa
• Population: Moderately Populated
• Accessibility: Toa's Palace is located near a large lake, around 30 people have died by accidentally falling off into the lake when leaving Toa's Palace. The system is old and dull. It hasn't changed much in the last 50 years, it's just gotten older.
• Description: The palace is around 500 meters long, and about 50 meter tall.​​ Vee Toa's throne room is an old large room with a large width. On Vee Toa's desk he has a Crown that he amassed around 50 years ago, it is one of his most proud possessions
• Defense: N/A

POINT OF INTEREST

The First building in the Palace is a salvaging area for the Battle Droids that Vee Toa owns, and repairs them. The Second Building is a Gambling Area. The Third Building is a Trading Facility / Buy Sell & Trade. The Fourth Building is Toa's Personal Office, where he does all of his business and where he sleeps. The Fifth Building is where the Servants, and Guests sleep.

 

[Jairus Starvald]

Under review.

 

[Jairus Starvald]

[member="Vee Toa"]

Are you subbing this as a military base or as a structure? You seem to have pulled together fields from a bunch of templates and I need to know for reference what you are going for here exactly.

 

[Vee Toa(Hutt Rep)]

[member="Jairus Starvald"] It's a structure.

 

[Jairus Starvald]

[member="Vee Toa"]

Gotcha.

Then what I need you to do is use the structure template as the 'base' of your submission. Basically copy-paste that, fill the info you got here in it and then simply add the fields from the military base you added here to it.

Because right now you are mixing and matching two templates, which can be really confusing.

If you need help with that, let me know and otherwise just tag me once it's done.

 

[Jairus Starvald]

[member="Vee Toa"]

Status on this?

 

[Vee Toa(Hutt Rep)]

So is that the only thing that I need to do in order for it to be accepted?

 

[Jairus Starvald]

[member="Vee Toa"]

That depends on how it will look on the other side. Because right now the mixture of different templates also adds inconsistencies within your sub.

For instance your defenses mentions a few droids, whereas your population has 1000 battle droids.

Once you make the edit I will be better able to see what you are going for here.

 

[Vee Toa(Hutt Rep)]

Okay, I will edit it!

 

[Jairus Starvald]

[member="Vee Toa"]

I am going to move this to the Pre-Codex so you can work on it at your own place. Tag either Allyson Locke or an RPJ to move it back, once its ready for review.

 

[Zeradias Mant]

Archived for inactivity. Please contact a Codex RPJ or the Codex Admin to have this brought back to the Pre-Codex.

 

[Ellie Mors]

[member="Zeradias Mant"] [member="Vee Toa"]
This submission has been moved back to the pre-codex by request of the submitter.

 

[Vee Toa(Hutt Rep)]

Asking to have this submission put back into the Codex
[member="Allyson Locke"]

 

[Arekk]

Under review.

[member="Vee Toa"]

 

[Arekk]

Okay, it seems you've adjusted the template to your own preference but I cannot review this if you don't include/change some things that are missing/you are currently modifying the current template:

Palace Name:

Use Structure Name:

Do not change "Structure" with Palace.

Affiliation: Owned and Controlled by Vee Toa

Provide a link to your character sheet.

Security: [Are there security measures to protect it? Normal civilian structures should not have much in security other than privatized forces and minor defenses. Military or very heavily defended locations should be submitted using the Military Base template. Please list and link any defenses/security forces present at this location. If none, simply put N/A.]

You're missing this part under "Accessibility."

Population: Around 500

Use "Moderately Populated" instead.

Description: The palace is around 500 meters long, and about 50 meter talls.​​

Can you be a bit more specific about the interior of the palace? How does Vee Toa's throne room look like, if there's any? The halls, the kitchen, the vault? Anything you can think of.

DEFENSE:

Around 30 guards

Remove this and use the security part as I pointed out above.

[member="Vee Toa"]

 

[Vee Toa(Hutt Rep)]

Edits made
[member="Arekk"]

 

[Arekk]

Defense: N/A

Remove this.

Security: N/A

You have pointed out there's no security measures on Toa's Palace but mention guards in the Points of Interest section. Could you amend either to make sense on the submission?

[member="Vee Toa"]

 

[Arekk]

Status on this submission?

[member="Vee Toa"]

 

[Vee Toa(Hutt Rep)]

The corrections are made
[member="Arekk"]

 

[Arekk]

[member="Vee Toa"]

Approved, pending secondary.