Public This Venue is Overbooked [Open]

[Zapp Boomslang]

"Oh, AND he knows how to make a first impression?" Zapp cooed to one of her attendants. The attendant was, of course, obligated to chuckle nervously, smile, and nod in agreement. "They simply don't make men like that anymore, at least I assume not. It's a good thing these boys didn't have to knock any holes in you or your finely-tailored outfit, or I'd have had to run them up on charges of harming an endangered animal."

Zapp tittered at her own joke, a little too fast and a little too shrill to sound natural. The attendant also tried to laugh at this. Zapp swiftly cuffed her upside the head, snarling. "Turn the lights down, idiot. Can't you recognize flash-shades when you see them?!" She hissed. "The poor thing is probably still reeling from that horrible trick with the stage lights."

"But you're the -" The attendant only got out three words before Zapp cuffed her again, eyes briefly alight with an uncommon fury. She didn't hit hard, but it wouldn't be hard to imagine that if Zapp had been holding a knife at that moment she'd have sheathed it in her ear.

A small breath. Centered. Zapp's smile returned - gregarious, vivacious, fearless. "I'd tell you not to worry, but you don't seem only concerned. Hello! I'm Zapp - I'm sure you know, what with all the loudspeakers - and you're a well-dressed mystery who has spared Kindly Lrungo the cost of several kilos of raw meat going forward!" She chirped, offering her hand. "I'm passing along gratitude on his behalf. Would you care for a refreshment? Drink, snack, chair?" Zapp inquired brightly. "I'm sure my worthless, chatty attendant would be happy to make an apology for her poor manners by helping you be more comfortable."

 

[Razmir Tezhyn]

"I wouldn't object to a Coronet, or Corellian Whisky. Would you fetch some from the reserve? Oh and a Kaiburr Crystal to chase it down? Thank you," Razmir regained his smile for the attendant's sake.

He doubted there was anyone five sectors over who could mix a Kaiburr Crystal, so she'd likely be busy running that errand for a while. With any luck it might come as a well deserved reprieve from the--admittedly stylish--neon lightning bolt she was at the mercy of.

"I'm Razmir, or Raz to friends," he said, attention returning to the human shaped lightning bolt in question.

After the lounge, he didn't have it in him to juggle the many details of a fake identity while talking to someone with so many moving facets to keep track of. Plus, he didn't intend on pulling a scheme. Not yet at least, and nothing more than he usually subjected new contacts to. A more straight approach seemed wisest.

"Very pleased to make your acquaintance, Zapp," he offered his free hand with a slight bow.

His smile to her was a well-practiced one. It was more mechanical, admittedly, but he made sure it reached his eyes despite the exhaustion from the adrenaline leaving his system. You could always tell if it's real by whether the smile reached the eyes. That detail separated amateur fake-smilers from the real fakers, and Raz didn't want to be outed as faking it just yet.

"Will the Peerless and August Lrungo be joining us on his birthday? I haven't even had the chance to congratulate him in person."

Zapp Boomslang

 

[Vyn Daldoure]

Crayola party room: crying, others not Vyn.

He flipped the Vibro knife in his hand kissing the bottom of the handle. It was a miracle the thing even got swiped, more so that he was able to retrieve it. He sheathed it and watched as Loomi and Seydan crossed the room effectively. Vyn provided cover fire in the direction of their Nemodian friends, now sure, he was facing the Pantorans, but with their choice in attire, he figured fight the clumsy guys first, the blind ones second.

Watching as the young Godoan vault the stage that was his que to move, twisting his torso he ran in the direction of his companions, ducking under an Amphistaff He placed his gauntlet against the ribs of the Nemodian, a low -Wubwub Thump- blue energy dissipated away from the area of contact as the Nemodian, was sent backwards like he'd been on the receiving end of a push with the force.

Vyn kept going, he reached the stage, his shoulder hit the corner as he rolled up and onto it, scrambling to his feet and diving into the door while letting out a sigh. "Alright, let's take bets on what's behind door number three, Alec I'll take rabid womp rats for five thousands creds." He joked or at least attempted to comment with dry sarcasm, but part of him was worried he'd actually guess right.

 

[Zapp Boomslang]

She might've been a loathsome thing, but Zapp Boomslang gave a surprisingly professional handshake. The handshake of a person you've just helped in a meaningful way, wishing you well before parting and already planning to find a way to pay back your kindness. It might be easy to believe the handshake spoke of good character if one put stock in such things, up until she started talking again.

"The drinks. Fetch them. Quickly." Zapp instructed her attendant, snapping her fingers rapidly. "From the reserve, if you would. And a Gentleman's Flavor for me. Take Tuscon with you in case Giornne decides to get creative with the cocktails. Back in ten minutes or I take your other little toe~!"

The harried attendant nodded rapidly, bowed twice, and then departed rapidly with one of the Gamorrean guards for - presumably - protection.

"Poor Nerian - keeps messing up, keeps paying to have toes regrown. Such a vicious cycle. So many expense reports for toes; three this week! REALLY skewing the quarterlies for body part replacements. AAANYWAY- His Most Portly and Generous will NOT be joining us here, mostly due to the fact that the Panopticon is not very accessible to those who can't fit in a human-sized elevator or manage stairs." Zapp sighed, pursing her lips in a mild pout. "So sad, missing out awwww somebunny should do a thing aboot dat." She shrugged theatrically, turning her back on Razmir to walk back up into her elevated spot.

Zapp took a deep breath, considering her monitors for a moment. Then then turned and flashed Razmir a downright radiant smile. Disarming, almost - filled with good cheer and delight. "Razmir!" She crowed, before continuing in a slightly more steady tone. "Raz. We're going to be good friends. The best, even. How would you like to be the man who kills The Most Vulnurable and Phlegmatic Lrungo the Hutt?"

As if on cue, a well-dressed attendant stepped forward with a gold-plated blaster pistol and took a knee, presenting it on a gilded tray alongside a silk hankerchief embroidered with Lrungo's face.

 

[Niysha]

Where: A wedding giving off Jojo menace kanji
Who: In Rhan , Vikai Caznä
What: Staring down the world's shortest NRA convention

The dark Jedi child they'd been saddled with seemed upset for... some unknowable reason? It was a clothes thing that Niysha couldn't translate, so it was probably a color thing. She paid it no mind and fixed her jacket, stood at the door, and spent a solid second looking very, very confused. On the other side there seemed to be some kind of... colony? One huge droid and a colony of something. Before In managed to make it out of the staff lounge, before the door was even open, Niysha paused by the doorway.

"What."

Seconds later, of course, everyone else saw what she was seeing, so she didn't really need to explain. Also, she couldn't explain. No scientist, priest, or philosopher could explain this. Surely there was some kind of barometric or chemical justification for why a not-inconsiderable portion of the entire Patitite species was holding a wedding in a small, isolated corner of Lrungo the Hutt's mega-yacht, because there certainly wasn't a logical one. The enormous assassin droid officiating the proceedings made exactly as much sense as the rest.

Fortunately, any confused tension was immediately dispersed when In tripped gracefully and dropped the tiny droid she'd been holding like a teddy bear. It was very shortly replaced with actual, dangerous tension when a not-inconsiderable portion of the entire Patitite species pulled blasters on all three of them in response.

The galaxy froze in place.

The mouse droid, having bumped in a panicked mess up against one of the legs of a table for the reception, bounced across the tense, empty floor like a tumbleweed, swearing in binary the whole time.

Niysha used the tense silence to process the situation. The door on the far side wasn't guarded, and there was plenty of cover to duck between on the way there. She counted at least two dozen blasters trained on them. Small ones. Probably nonlethal, though she hardly wanted to test that. She had no way of gauging the potential skill of two-dozen blue midgets.

Her instincts told her to move now. Someone coughed a heartbeat later, and that seemed to be the signal to commence firing. A horrifying volley of bolts filled the air that Niysha would've been standing in if she hadn't already been in the process of rolling behind a refreshment table when the silence broke. Acting on pure reflex, she kicked it onto its side, sending yet another huge cake falling dramatically to the floor. This time, of course, it threatened to drown a couple of Patitites, but that was an unfortunate necessity to make use of the surprisingly blaster-resistant buffet table as cover.

 

[Vikai Caznä]

"I got a bad feeling about this..." Vikai mumbled out to herself as she stepped up to the door with the others. The moment the door was opened, Vikai's eyes squinted as she adjusted to the sudden bright lights above, made brighter by the pure white attire worn by the little folk. "Right.. Other side. Just.. be normal. Other side." Yet another mumble, this one meant entirely to herself. She slowly stepped ahead into the wedding room, about to try and 'weave' through the 'crowd' of 'people', which wouldn't have hidden her at all. That was ruined of course, the moment In Rhan stumbled and slumped, nearly tripping over. Of course, the drone was dropped, then skittered away and incurred the worse possible situation to occur.

Blaster fire, whirling blades, and screams of chaos as the entire wedding turned into a shotgun wedding in the most literal sense of the word.

"I SAID NORMAL!" Vikai's lightsaber was drawn and ignited to the ready, already predicting the soon flurry of blaster fire that would come her way -

Dink. Dink. Dink.

BOOM.

The wall opposite the staff entrance exploded in one warping split moment, sending debris flying and a chuck of wall right into Vikai's head, causing her to go limp right onto her back, which was soon followed by a growling-groan of pain. The wall that had the controls for the dance floor was now entirely destroyed.

"I OBJECT!" A teny-tiny voice roared from the smoke and dust of the exploded wall. "TULAI! I LOVE YOU!" Slowly but surely, a voice was given a body as a Patitite male was revealed, adorned in bandoliers of explosives, blasters, and blades. Flanked at his sides was a pair of assassin droids that wielded massive, explosive launchers meant to inflict the most possible chaos and indiscriminate destruction across the wedding room.

At what first seemed to be a entirely doomed situation had a gleam of hope to it; the destruction of the control panel on the other side caused the dance floor to begin sliding open; but slowly. Slow enough where the trio will have to survive for at least a minute before they can slip in.

Vikai slowly dragged herself over to the makeshift, but effective cover that Niysha made for them. She grasped at the lightsaber at her side, considering for a moment before she glanced over to the blind woman for a moment, her face revealing nothing else but a dejected lost to the inner workings of the galaxy. Slowly but surely, she came back to her senses, turning towards In Rhan . She barked out a demanding 'request', "Get over here!"

 

[In Rhan]

Where: A rapidly deteriorating situation. Again. Wedding Edition.
Who: Niysha Vikai Caznä
Why: are we here? To make cakes suffer?

Niysha had cover, and both of In's (inexplicable, how had her life become this?) Sith escorts were there. The Pantoran woman ran and slid across the floor, slamming into the table between Niysha and Vikai. A moment later, still screaming, the gilded mouse droid scuttled out from the firefight to join them, hiding between In's legs. It had somehow obtained a knife, still wet with wedding cake.

"Why do we even BOTHER with disguises." In snarled in naked disdain, bonking her head against the table with her eyes closed. "I hate it here."

The HK-379 Assassin/Nuptial Droid reared up to the challenge, turning its seven glowing red eyes on the wedding crasher and his retinue. "Lovesick Assertion: You will not take them from me." It stated. The massive droid's voice at full volume was loud enough to rattle the chandeliers. It took two steps forward, scooped up a pew with a pair of antiquated B1 Battle Droids wearing costume beards on it, and charged into the melee wielding the pew like a greatsword. The B1 droids clung to their seat desperately as it was swung around, the HK-379 blasting flat-voiced threats. "Sincere Promise: I will destroy this station before I let you lay a hand on Tulai, Jyn-di."

One of the B1s perked up, an ancient transistor firing. "Jedi?"
The other responded in kind immediately. "Blast 'em!"
The two B1s produced blaster rifles, wildly spraying automatic blaster fire one-handed as they clung to the HK-379's melee weapon - somehow not being destroyed in the process.

 

[Razmir Tezhyn]

If Razmir had a drink he might have spit it out.

Instead, he picked up the blaster, examining it. It had a good weight to it—heavier than a standard model. The kind that imparted an irresponsible sense of power when held.

Raz twirled the pistol a few times, nothing too fancy, but enough to make it clear he was well-versed with blasters. He caught the grip and raised it up. The sights were well made. Precision work, hand-calibrated, seemingly factory new. They lined up nicely with Zapp's neon-lit eyes. Razmir's finger eased into the guard.

He had a clear shot. The detonators gave him decent odds against the guards. He could end her streak of cruelty here. Anyone who treated life with such casual disregard was better off six-feet under.

With a deliberate motion, he let the grip slip from his fingers. The blaster's weight shifted and it tilted forward as the barrel surrendered itself to gravity.

"It's a nice gun," Razmir said.

Unfortunately, the one he wanted was Lrungo, and she was his key to him.

Raz holstered the gun on the inside of his jacket. He took the handkerchief to wipe the rest of Bek'bek's remains from his face. Lrungo's Grandiose and Handsome visage became smeared with dried Tuk'ata blood.

"But why me?"

With her setup and resources, Zapp must have had plenty opportunity to off her boss. Which added the possibility she was baiting him into a trap. He didn't put being a calculating schemer past her, even if she gave the impression her 'schemes' might be little more than impulsive ideas with extra steps.

Zapp Boomslang

 

[Zapp Boomslang]

As Razmir levelled the blaster at her some - not all, or even the majority - of the staff in the room reacted. A couple gasped, a few visibly tensed. One of the guards put a hand on his blaster, but there was a good chance he wasn't even one of hers. Not a single soul jumped to Zapp's aid, nor did any of the guards make a motion to disarm or threaten Razmir. One might be forgiven for thinking that this was because she'd planned this out and briefed them, and Zapp would have certainly made the overtures towards this being the case, but the answer was much simpler.

Razmir could have blown her head off then and there, and nobody would have raised a single hand. Not even Zapp herself. Not because she had confidence in his motivations, but simply because it honestly hadn't occurred to her that he'd have shot her with her own blaster.

"Why? As though you need ask?" Zapp sighed, her vulpine grin never wavering. "The Most Cromulent and Crumbulent Lrungo the Hutt craves SPECTACLE! His Corpulence is a commesurate showman in his hearts, and he'd like to instill in his rivals the very real fear that he can transcend death itself!" She declared, throwing her arms out to either side as she leaned against the railing on her dias. "We'll have him assassinated at the very moment he appears to make a speech, only for him to reveal his awareness for the entire plan. A show of skill! A performance of intrigue! A display that will be talked about for decades, or at least DAYS in this news cycle."

Zapp tittered into the back of her hand. "We've had the finest chefs and engineers in the Tingel arm working around the clock to build a photo-realistic scale replica of The Most Amusing and Highspirited Lrungo for days." She explained, oozing self-satisfaction. "Cake, of course. Literal tons of birthday cake built around an animatronic skeleton. After all - NOTHING beats practical effects for pure immersion." Zapp crowed. "And as for your part-"

Zapp's eyes lit up, the neon highlights in her hair pulsing a brighter shade of pink as she snapped her fingers. The wall of screens behind her flashed and displayed Razmir Tezhyn in dozens of different freeze-frames. Firing a blaster at a guard, slipping on his shutter-shades, standing amidst a dozen guards as he was escorted upstairs, chatting up a Miralukan in a suit. "The camera LOVES you, Raz!" Zapp declared grandly, throwing her arms out to either side for emphasis. "Even you can't deny it! The swagger of an action star, the raw sex appeal of a dramatic lead, even when you picked up that blaster - Chills! Chills up and down my spine!" Zapp visibly shuddered, then squealed like a lovesick teenager. The sound didn't quite complete, the exuberance and glee flickering off of her face as though it'd never been there.

"To sell the fantasy, I need an appropriately photogenic leading man." Zapp explained flatly. "After your failed assassination attempt, you will of course abscond into a nearby escape pod with your prize - half your weight in aurodium, with The Most Frustrated and Recalcitrant Lrungo's majordomo - yours truly - as a hostage." She concluded. "I will escape your clutches at Redshift station, of course, but be unable to stop you from taking the treasure or report on your wherabouts after that."

 

[Niysha]

Where: Midgets vs. Battle Droids, with cake
Who: In Rhan , Vikai Caznä
What: Engaging in a flashmob Clone Wars reenactment

For the moment, In was safe. They'd need to make sure to thank the screamy little dark Jedi they'd picked up later for that one. Maybe not too much; she'd taken her lightsaber out which had, as expected, attracted attention. Working with this girl might've been anything but smooth, but it was certainly valuable perspective. Drawing a Sith blade was just about the loudest, brightest, most public thing you could do, and the Miraluka had once again been given plenty of reason to avoid touching hers at any reasonable cost.

As a siege engine worth of assassin droid half-destroyed the reception room in an attempt to squish the galaxy's tiniest terrorist and his small squad of... more assassin droids, Niysha's sight was flooded with a bit too much information. Stressful situations required a bit of concentration to sift through garbage information and sensory clutter to find what was actually relevant. The electrical lighting in the room, the frequencies from nearby rooms, and the general haze of anxiety, anger, and forbidden lust surrounding all of them were all unecessary.

What was necessary, seconds before it became a problem, was the two battle droids about to rain down comically inaccurate blaster fire on their position. Niysha didn't have a lot of time to react before that would become a problem, so she once again searched the room. Far side? The table behind the altar. That one wasn't covered in cake. Leaning back away from the first table she'd used as cover, the Miraluka brought her hand up and called a second one.

Lifting a table with precision, through a firefight, to hold it in one specific position was a tall order. It tumbled a bit during the transition, whacking a few of the witnesses over their tiny heads, but she had it in place moments after the first few hilariously wide shots scorced the durasteel beneath their feet. Hopefully this one was a miraculously blaster-resistant as the catering table had been.

Niysha's plan was perfect, as always.

Chaos ensued, as always. She was too busy concentrating to take much note of the Patitite hitchhiker she'd picked up. She knew there was one hanging onto one side of the table for dear life, but... frankly, all of them were very difficult to tell apart. She couldn't possibly have known that she'd accidentally absconded with the bride.

 

[In Rhan]

The wall had been blown open, and the controls with it. Unfortunately, they needed those controls to get the dance floor open and descend into the storage areas where her ship was. In briefly considered leaving this wedding in search of another path, but she suspected that the entire station was more or less anarchy at this point. The distant barking of the auctioneer had been entirely drowned out by blaster fire, the overhead commentary from Zapp had halted for the moment. Going a different route would just mean facing a different problem, and this one wasn't insurmountable yet. The remnants of the wall had wires, and those wires could send the signal to open the dance floor. They just needed a way to turn electrical signals into coherent door commands.

In's eyes landed on the gilded mouse droid.

In nodded and began crawling for it.

It backed away slowly, shaking the nose of its box-like body back and forth.

In nodded frantically, beckoning.

The mouse droid turned to flee.

She dove for it, flipped it onto its back, and pried the maintenance panel open with a cake-serving knife while it screamed. "Stop crying! You're getting a promotion!" The Pantoran woman chastised sternly, wiping cake away from her eyes as she hid behind a table. "You don't have a scomp, so-"

Wires pulled. Ripped. Spliced back together. Inhumane surgery, done with pastry implements and a random pair of scissors. Creating an interface didn't take much, the Mouse Droid had all the internal hookups necessary for a scomp - just not the scomp itself. In circumvented this by way of a makeshift computer spike, made from parts of the Droid wrapped around a small cone made of fancy wedding knives from the buffet table.

The mouse droid buzzed flatly, spinning the horn In had given it. Brandishing it, really. "Alright. Plan. You stab that into the mess of wires by that door, wrap 'em up like noodles, and one of them is BOUND to be the 'open the door' wire." In instructed. "Ready!?"

The Mouse Droid answered with a negatory blap. In nodded. "Good luck, soldier!" She chirped, giving the droid a wink and a salute before standing from cover.

Bellowing a mighty yell, In raised the Mouse Droid over her head with both hands and hurled it as hard as she could. "NIYSHA! SPIKE COMBO!" The Pantoran woman bellowed desperately. "FLYYY!"

 

[Vikai Caznä]

Pinned down by a torrent of blaster fire, instructed to not wield her one weapon, and incoherent ramblings of 'Spike Combo' and 'Promotion' were flooding the unfortunate ears of Vikai, and quite truthfully, she didn't know how to handle all of it. Those eyes of pure yellow whipped about, looking for anything that could pull eyes away from them - if even for a brief moment. Vikai found nothing with her sight besides more blaster fire, panicking small people, and glinting steel, yet, she did hear something. A screaming bride they had absconded with on the table. Vikai peeked over the edge of the table to spot the screeching, horrified Patitite that was clinging to the table's cloth as if her life depended on it - because it did.

It did not take a genius for somebody to come up with the plan Vikai thought up - or at least that is what she believed. In truth, her plan was equal parts cruel, risky, and stupid. Yet in that stupidity, it could be proven to be stupid enough to work. The Sith's arm lashed out to snatch the Patitite bride by her gown's headpiece, clutching down as she pulled her upwards, and reeled her back. Vikai sucked in a breath in-between her teeth, and promptly screamed,

"THE BRIDE!"

And then, she hucked the small, screeching bride across the raging room of blaster fire, her body flopping around in a spin as she went soaring. A distraction, to pull all the focus onto her, and not them. And how did it turn out?

It worked. It somehow worked. There was a brief pause of blasters, followed by every Patitite, Droid, and the singular Twi'lek servant watching as the bride went airborne.

"THE BRIDE!?"

Panic ensued, as each party besides the trio sought to try and recover the lady of the day from crashing head first into something.