The First Steps

[Aurelion Nova]

As Aurelion drew his new set of robes around himself, breathe still slightly shaking from reliving that nightmare from so long ago, before gathering his wits and stepping out of the room the Order has prepared for him in the Silver Rest. The leafy boughs of Kashyyyk's mighty, verdant forests a welcome sight to the young Jedi as he drew in a soft, steady breathe through his nose before a light smile graced hid features. His sky-blue eye scanning the canopy above him, the forest far below him as far as he could see, and Aurelion chose to ascend. Much preferring the light-strewn boughs of the mighty trees to the dark-laden surface of the planet, what the Wookies referred to as "The Shadowlands". Regardless, Aurelion drew his mind more sharply to the present, focusing on the task to come.

Aurelion was finally, truly ready to meet a Master who would train him. He had been looking forward to this day for so long. Hopeful that, despite the many hardships of trying to wrest his own emotions, and atunement to the Force, into balance he would finally prove himself worth instructing. His long, elven ears perked up slightly in uncharacteristic optimism, his posture straightened, and Aurelion walked further up into the light Kashyyyk's start provided as the planet all around him teemed with life and the Force. The wailing calls of various animals and creatures of all kinds, of life itself, heralding his arrival to the lone platform among the canopy he was scheduled to meet his Master. Aurelion had gotten there slightly ahead of schedule, partly due to how much he enjoyed Kashyyyk's vibrant wildlife being so very different from growing up on his home-world, and partly due to wanting to impress upon his Master just how much this opportunity meant to him.

After stepping out into the center of the platform, glancing down only briefly at the seemingly infinite darkness that the towering heights of Kashyyyk's trees made possible, Aurelion sat on the wooden surface beneath him. Crossing his legs and bracing his arms on his knees, Aurelion decided to meditate, to try and center himself in the Force, and prepare himself for whatever way in which his Master may wish to test him. After slowing his breathing, his thin chest expanding and contracting in deep, even movements, Aurelion closed his eye. Stretching out his perceptions as well as he was able, feeling the flow of life and energy all around him as the Force sung in the presence of all the verdant, abundant life around him. The usual, omnipresent backdrop of the Force on most planets paling in comparison to how the Force rushed and flowed in Kashyyyk's abundant landscape. Like an ever-rushing river that came from everywhere, and nowhere, at once to bathe his senses in a deep, lightening connection to everything his expanded perceptions touched.

This, however, did not last. As Aurelion let a small smile grace his lips, his connection to the Light side of the Force growing deeper and more vibrant in the presence of the triumphant chorus of life all around him, that Light began to grow cold and waver. A single, stabbing doubt puncturing the heart of Aurelion's concentration. Making his tenuously-held bubble of control over his emotions quake and warble, sending sporadic, rippling waves out through the Force as Aurelion knit his brow in concentration. His muscles tensing as a familiar, hot sensation crept it's way into his senses. Like hot, dilapidated tar did stinging, hateful words ring through his mind. Each berating comment remembered, each blow almost re-experienced, making Aurelion now feel as if his skin was bathed in cold light, while he thrashed and drowned in a sea of burning sludge. His concentration snapping like a thrumming wire snapped with the suddenness of a cutting torch scything through it's form. Aurelion's eyes snapping open to reveal that his distress had echoed through the Force, and all about him the creatures of Kashyyyk laid still and silent, his tumult in the Force having tore and scraped the wood of the platform off in jagged, splintering tears. Aurelion... sighed, a cold, simple sadness settling over his heart like an icy cage as he rest his head in his hands, his elongated ears drooping subtly in sadness as he once again tried to steady his breathing.​

 

[Josh Dragovalor]

With recent graduations, the Dragon School class was beginning to feel a little empty. Having made recruitment available again, and the beginning of the hierarchy changes beginning to free up his time. He could admit to feeling a little sad that his tenure in his current position was coming to an end, but that was just how things went. The Silver Jedi Order was constantly evolving, and it wasn't fair for Josh to pull two the duties of two roles anyway, when he had his own missions and duties to carry out outside of that, along with raising his son. Josh didn't mind it, he was happy to help out the best he could, even if he was a little offended it took the Assembly so long of footing around until they said they wanted a less public leader and wanted a background Assembly leader. But he didn't dwell on it. Instead, he put his focus on the important things, like the new Padawans he would be training. One of which was coming in shortly.

But speaking of, Josh had been taking a walk to clear his head when he felt it. The ripple of the force, the rending and ripping. His curiosity got the better of him and even when he did find the source, the kid that was to be his new student, he let it go until the man was calm again. He didn't want to startle him, it might make it worse. He'd only pull him out if he absolutely had to. When the man did calm down, he would approach calmly.

"Is everything alright?"

[member="Aurelion Nova"]

 

[Aurelion Nova]

Aurelion didn't immediately react as Josh questioned him. He, obviously, hadn't been in the best state of mind for detecting the approaching Jedi Master. Under normal circumstances the timid Padawan would likely have jumped in surprise or stammered a respectful greeting, but not this time. He wasn't entirely in the present with his thoughts, and as he cradled his head in his hands, he had to inhale deeply to somewhat center himself again. It wasn't perfect and to anyone, and everyone, who could sense the Force Aurelion's already tenuous self-confidence had turned his meager grasp of his abilities to a Force signature now resembling a structure made of shattered glass. As much held together by the pressure and weight each individual piece exerted on those around it then it was by Aurelion's will. Each jagged shard of 'glass' a memory, each memory hazed and fogged by a Padawan who did not want to remember them.

With a final exertion of will that same fractured structure would draw together like an odd, crystalline puzzle to the point each individual crack became very difficult to discern in Aurelion's connection to the Force. While it seemed evident Aurelion had an innately powerful connection to the Force, holistically, he didn't seem to be able to focus it efficiently or even reliably. It would be evident to Josh that whatever Aurelion was dealing with, or had been through, had effected him deeply enough to ripple through the boy's connection to the Force and shatter it apart bit by bit. In a way it was almost as if Aurelion had been subjected to an incomplete, and inexpertly done, Force Sever ritual. However it was also obvious that whatever had caused his Force signature to be this way was not an act that, in and of itself, had taken place through the Force.

Dropping his hands from his face and blinking his single eye into focus Aurelion would slowly stand from his meditative position and, glancing up from the floor for a moment to study Josh, would then return his gaze to the ground at Josh' feet. Aurelion hadn't known a thing about whom his Master would be aside from his name and, looking at the man, Aurelion felt.... unworthy? Out of place? His Master, by the looks of him, was what one would expect a Jedi to look like. Like some sort of superhero. While Aurelion was just..... himself. Shaking his head to dispel the thoughts as best he could Aurelion sighed before answering honestly and simply. "No, Master." Aurelion's elongated ears slowly lifted back to their normal place as some of the anxiety-induced tension left his body. Looking around as the various animals of Kashyyyk began to resume their chorus of life and nature Aurelion shrugged "Sometimes it is just....too much. Too many ripples, too many voices or thoughts. Too much.... life. That..... sort of thing."

Aurelion bit his mental tongue before adding quietly , idly glancing off the platform down towards the impenetrable darkness below of Kashyyyk's forest floor as he murmured "And not all of them pleasant.". He recalled a single stabbing thought of doubt rupturing his concentration and while it was true the overwhelming symphony of life around him had been unnerving to him. Reminding him of the buzzing, thrumming hives of scum and villainy he had to traverse as a child recovering his mother from various bars or worse..... there had been... a source for the doubt. Some small flicker of darkness in this world that sung with light and life. Something on this planet had connected to him, something dark, and while he was confused by it all Aurelion set his stance before Josh. Drawing up his confidence as he bowed to him and answered "I apologize Master, that was unbecoming of me as a Jedi."

[member="Josh Dragonsflame"]

​

 

[Josh Dragovalor]

The Jedi Master would nod his head slowly, listening as he would recount his issues. He could sense the inner turmoil, it was like a beacon. His thoughts, his feelings, they projected from him wildly as though they were some sort of light show. But the truth of the matter was, for all of his miscontentment with himself, all of that lack of confidence in himself... The truth of the matter was that everyone in this building had their doubts. And everyone had their darkness. Even Josh did.

So he would continue his stride, before coming face to face with his newest Padawan. He smiled softly, calmly, reassuringly. "Relax" He spoke then, his tone gentle. "Breathe in, breathe out... Release the tension in your body, lower your shoulders, unflex your hands and just let it flow. The best way to see the Force, feel the Force, and embrace it... Is to do so when it is crystal clear. Don't get frustrated if you can't do it at first... Most of us couldn't for some time. And I know that you are going to have doubts... That's okay. I have them too. Had them recently, even. Life likes to throw curveballs at us, likes to make things difficult... The biggest thing about being a Jedi is overcoming these things, and then taking what you have learned... To help others.

The Force is a force, pardon the pun... Of nature in of itself, though. It cannot be controlled, only worked alongside. You need to learn to exist along with it, embrace it, make friends with it. And sometimes it will be overwhelming, just as it is now... But that's what the training is for."

[member="Aurelion Nova"]

 

[Aurelion Nova]

It said something about his new Master's character that he responded to Aurelion's demeanor with a calm smile, an explanation and, of all things, a pun. Aurelion did as he was told, a not-too-small part of his subconscious put much at ease by the fact that Josh was... well.... a man. Though Aurelion had never really known his father it did wonders that the person who would be helping to shape his perception of the Force, himself and the Order didn't even carry the possibility to remind him of his mother. Aurelion breathe was... shaky, more hitching in odd spots than that of someone on the verge of tears. Aurelion nodded, singular eye closing, until his nodding became slightly more firm and understanding. A soft exhale of finality leaving his lips before a small smile then graced them. "Thank you...Master. I'm.... just very anxious." He admitted softly, eye falling to the wooden platform beneath them.

While this was true, that Aurelion was anxious, this was for several reasons. He had no real experience wielding the Force beyond the most basic means. He had no light-saber to call his own. In most ways that mattered to the galaxy he was hardly what anyone could even call a Jedi. The simple fact that he was trying to earn that title, that recognition, along with all the weight, personally and for the Order, and responsibility that came along with it.... was enough to make him fearful of his first steps with his new Master down to his very bones. And while Aurelion was entirely unsure of what that small tendril of darkness that reached out to his senses from the very depths of Kashyyk to disturb his focus the thought to even wonder about it fell from his mind as he looked up at Josh with a wide, inquisitive eye. His thoughts settling firmly on trying to be prepared on whatever was to be ahead of him. "I will... do my best to... to make you proud." Aurelion promised, bowing his head slightly.

[member="Josh Dragonsflame"]
​

 

[Josh Dragovalor]

"Breathe, dude. You're gonna be fine" Josh remarked abruptly. Perhaps it was a bit jarring for him to go from his generally formal Jedi Master lingo to something far more casual and civilian-like. But by what Josh could see, this guy needed something to settle him down. Something to bring him back down to earth and remind him that he was amongst people. That most of all, might be one of the biggest keys of helping this one attain balance in whatever might be ailing him. He wasn't sure just what it was yet, but he was sure he could find out with time.

"So, our first lesson!" He chirped, doing his best to remain optimistic in tone, hoping it would catch on and spread to the Padawan as well. "Your first lesson is to calm yourself. Clear your mind. I know I'm probably just repeating myself here, but it's important, I swear. Don't let it all get to you. I know it sounds hard, but I know you can do it. Once you've cleared your mind, settled down, and mastered yourself... Then a world of possibilities will open up to you."

[member="Aurelion Nova"]