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Codex Denied Tenegra, Home of the Voyuta

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DornImAuge

Searcher of the forces paths
Intent: Tenegra is the so called "paradise world" to the Voyuta, a hybrid species. It was the colonisation of this world that let the two original species fuse with time. In the present it is the only planet inhabitated by a society of Voyouta.
This is where its role is located as the home to Voyuta characters; to start their journeys and experiencing adventures based on the planets unique history.
The isolation of the planet slowly falls apart and it's inhabitants start to visit the stars ones again, trying to find their place in the new galaxy.

Image Credit: N/A

Canon: N/A

Permissions: N/A

Links: https://www.starwarsrp.net/threads/voyuta-voss-togruta-hybrids.139857/

GENERAL INFORMATION

Planet Name: Tenegra

Demonym: Tenegra

Region: Mid Rim, in the same hex as the Nooli system, 273 light years away.

System Name: Temegan

System Features: Central Body:
• spectral type F subdwarf star
• Tenegra, habitable super earth in inner orbit
• Equestrion Hunters, asteroid cluster on an elliptic orbit, coming closer to Tenegra or Tengan in regular intervalls
• Tengan, gasgiant in outer orbit
• Mirogan, nomadic moon of both Tengan and Teregan, changes its parent planet on stable regular intervalls once every 13 years
• protoplanetary ring of low density dust, close to Tengans orbit

Location: Mid Rim, in the same hex as the Nooli system, 273 light years away. close to the hex's corner in the galactic north east. The hyper space lane to this world is a secret.
(would like to not add it to the map for now)

Major Imports: Ships, technology, materials, luxury goods, norris root, ionit, droids

Major Exports: Various metalls, hfredium, quadrillium, oil, lethane, cortosis

Unexploited Resources:
Hfredium, quadrillium, various metalls, oil, lethane, cortosis

GEOGRAPHIC INFORMATION

Gravity: 1.7 G (1.7 times as strong as earths gravity)

Climate: mostly covered in semi arid climate

Primary Terrain: semi arid plains, hills and savanahs. flat mountain ranges, extremely deep oceans, steep clives at the coasts.

Atmosphere: Typ 1

LOCATION INFORMATION

Capital City: Rayra

Planetary Features:
• The warden temple, stretches over a whole valley in the hilly meadows
• Wreck of the Konclave in the middle of the capital city
• The capital city Ruyara
• up to a few hundret cities and a few thousand villages
• most of the planets citys posses "canals" to allow the local wildlife to pass by and not getting repressed by urbanization
• The planet is primarly wild with sub urban features passing smoothly into the vaste semi arid biomes

Major Locations:
• The capital city Ruyara with the largest population of five thousand. It's wide wildlife canals make it look like a giant node with strings reaching for all directions. The city was the first place of the world getting colonisated which also led to the capital building being arranged around the old giant wreck of the Konclave.
• The warden temple or also called the wardeners temple or minders temple in the warden valley

Force Nexus :
The warden valley, inhabited by seers much like those of ancient Voss and the final destination of spiritual pilgrimage of the whole society, is the epicenter of an aura of the living force stretching over every living entity that visited the temples valley.

Intent: The nexus fitts perfectly into the voyutas mindset and incorporates their Voss heritage. With the life friendly attitude of the population visiting the area in numbers of hundrets to thousand per year the place is also the center of spiritual activity of nearly all force users on the planet.
The nexus explains the long life time of the voyutas of 126 years and is an important aspect of in the process of considering the worthyness of contenders for ath bows.

Nexus Name: warden valley

Nexus Alignment: living Force

Size: Large as it is a valley

Strength: moderate due the constant presence of believers to the living force.

Accessibility: a valley on the southern hemissphäre, easily accesible on food from all sides. It is puplicly accesible for voyuta but out worlders need permission to be allowed to enter. The templer always supervise the location.

Effects: The nexus of the warden valley projects an aura of the living force to those who set foot in the place. This aura lenghtens the life span of the affected and projects tests to those seeking for various types of worthyness. Like those giving the right to hold plasmatic ath bows, force ath bows or to join the wardens ranks.

POPULATION

Native Species: Anything could lure in the giant landscape the planet offers. From sea monsters to predators as big as houses, most of it is unknown yet.

Immigrated Species: Voyuta (Voss and Togruta in the past)

Population: Sparse (576,000)

Demographics: 100% voyuta as now

Primary Languages: Galactic Basic, Language of the Voss, Language of the Togruta

Culture: The inhabitants live in groups ranging from villages to citys and feed on the wild flora and fauna in and out of civilisated areas. Voyuta usely form great bonds to their communes where they grow up. With reaching the age of seventeen, they are send to the warden temple to receive the right to construct and wield ath bows. Ath bows, short for Atmospheric plasma bows (the naming is sort if a peace of an ornament), are symbols for the relation to nature,life and honor.

GOVERNMENT & ECONOMY

Government: Counsil Coalition,
the state is governet by multiple counsils coalating for different means. The counsil of the warden and the counsil of Rayra are the most powerfull political entitys.

Affiliation: independent

Wealth: Low, the planet sparsily trades indirectly with the galaxy and is only willing to harvest few of it's resources to keep enviromentall damage low. And many workers are not awalaible.

Stability: High, there are very few social reasons for criminality and the seers stop most major incidents. A generely peacefull approach leads to low aggresivity against outsiders regardless of the agenda of keeping most of them out.

Freedom & Oppression: Members of tenegran society is generely free to do their own business as long as law is not violated. While the counsil of the wardens is only opened to members of the temple, most other political positions can be aquired ether by election, succes or great achievement.

MILITARY & TECHNOLOGY

Military: Besides there not being a real army, wide parts of the population are skilled hunters of the hostile wild life and are formidable fighters with ath bows. Silent, fast, tarned and precise. There are around nine thousand potential infanterists. In space, a small fleet of modernised venator class star destroyers are always stationed in the equestrian asteroid cluster, ready to flank any enemy who dares trying to distrub the voyutas paradise home. This fleet consists if 9 of those venators, equipped with long range hard hitting weaponry and droid crews to compensate the low number of personal. On the ground, some star fighters (~123) are spread around the most important location like the capital and the warden temple.

Technology: Galactic Standart, ath bows

HISTORICAL INFORMATION
During the gulag plague, a group of Togruta colonists left their world Shrili, hoping to found a civilisation of peace and prosperity much like the anscestors who once settled on Kiros. But there designation must had a remoteness unreachable for the plague and in a safe range of galactic conflicts. When passing the permelian trade route they received a call of voss ship. After the arch enemys of the Voss, the Gormak, smuggled the gulag infected goods into the city of Voss-Ka, a group of a few hundret uninfected Voss was choosen to take to space. Their mission was to meet with outsiders to ensure the ongoing of the Voss's existence as the seers confirmed. The missions of both species joined and with the guiding of the Voss seers, they safely navigated through uncartografed space, reaching Tenegra.
 
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Zak Dymo

Guest
Z
DornImAuge DornImAuge

I'll be conducting this review for you. Due to the ability to be added to the Chaos map, planet submissions have a two step approval process. After you receive my approval, you will have a second review with an Administrator before this submission will be final approved.

1. Intent.
Intent: Tenegra is the so called "paradise world" to the Voyuta, a hybrid species. It was the colonisation of this world that let the two original species fuse with time. In the present it is the only planet inhabitated by a society of Voyouta.
This is where its role is located as the home to Voyuta characters; to start their journeys and experiencing adventures based on the planets unique history.
The isolation of the planet slowly falls apart and it's inhabitants start to visit the stars ones again, trying to find their place in the new galaxy.

This provides a description of the native species, but it doesn't answer the actual question.

Intent: [ Describe the plan for your planet. NOTE: This section alone can have your planet dismissed. Planets created on a whim or for purposes to undermine the integrity of Star Wars will not be approved. ]

What is your goal for this submission? What kind of stories or development are you hoping to achieve with it? What purpose does it serve (for you, for a faction, for the board, etc)?

2. Region.
Region: Mid Rim, in the same hex as the Nooli system, 273 light years away.

Please link Mid Rim here. The rest of the information here is duplicative of the Location field and should be removed.

3. Location.

Location: Mid Rim, in the same hex as the Nooli system, 273 light years away. close to the hex's corner in the galactic north east. The hyper space lane to this world is a secret.

You can strike Mid Rim from this section, since that's been established in the Region field. Please link Nooli System here.

4. Major Imports.
Major Imports: Ships, technology, materials, luxury goods, norris root, ionit, droids

What kind of technology? What kind of materials? These should be defined with more detail, to avoid confusion in later roleplay (e.g. sudden mention of large Mandalorian Iron imports, etc).

Please link Norris Root here.

I am not familiar with any substance known as ionit. If you are referring to ionite, please link that here as well.

5. Major Exports.
Major Exports: Various metalls, hfredium, quadrillium, oil, lethane, cortosis

Note the spelling error here (metalls). Also, this should be defined. What metals does the planet export? Reading through the submission, I don't see mention of any mining or quarrying. If metal or ores is a major export, then that should be reflected in the planetary features or locations in some way.

Please link Hfredium, Quadrillium, Lethane, and Cortosis here.

6. Unexploited Resources
Unexploited Resources: Hfredium, quadrillium, various metalls, oil, lethane, cortosis

How are these planetary resources unexploited, when this appears to be identical to the list of major exports?

7. Gravity.

Gravity: 1.7 G (1.7 times as strong as earths gravity)

Please note that Earth specific terms are not allowed in Codex submissions (refer to General Submission Guidelines). As noted in the template, this would be 1.7 times as strong as standard gravity.

To avoid this getting too lengthy, I'll pause my review here to allow you to address those 7 points before we move on. I do note several spelling errors throughout the submission and so I'd ask you to look back through that as you make your edits.

Please let me know if you have any questions or concerns in light of my comments. Otherwise, please tag me when you have completed any edits.
 

DornImAuge

Searcher of the forces paths
I gonna correct my submissions. Due to myselfs motherlanguage being german I sometimes make spelling mistakes or forget to translate a word from german fandoms. Be free to mention mistakes should you note some after my workovers.
I understanded "unexploited" with not considerably mined. I used the reference to earth gravity because many people I saw confused G with meters per seconds. Is using the term superearth ok as it is a planet class? I considered a population of half a million as extremly small in comparison to real life but I'll stick to the templates definitions.
 

Zak Dymo

Guest
Z
DornImAuge DornImAuge

I appreciate the challenges that come with writing in a language that isn't your primary. I've had the opportunity to live in non-English speaking countries several times in my adult life, and recall vividly the frustration at adapting to different writing systems and grammatical structure.

Your last comment seems to refer to the species sub. Please remember to tag me on both this sub and that one, separately, so that I know when your edits are complete and those are ready for the next review.
 
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