Approved Tech Sorenn-Syrush Industries Commenor Series I Blaster Carbine

[Amelia von Sorenn]

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..:: Out of Character Information ::..
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Intent: The Production of a Standard Blaster Carbine for the Commenor Systems Alliance and its affiliated subfactions.

Image Source: N/a
Canon Link: N/a
Restricted Missions: N/a

Primary Source:

• Sorenn-Syrush Industries Commenor Series I Blaster Rifle

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..:: Production Information ::..
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Manufacturer:

• Sorenn-Syrush Industries

Model:

• SSI-CbcI

Affiliation:

• Closed-Market
  ​Sorenn-Syrush Industries
• Commenor Systems Alliance
• Sorenn-Syrush Dynasty
• Knights of the Pyre

Modularity:

• No

Production:

• Mass-Produced

Material:

• Durasteel
• Blaster Components
• Ayalayli Thornwood
• Ankarak Leather

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..:: Technical Specifications ::..
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Classification:

• Blaster

Size:

• Average
  ​Handheld
• 900mm

Weight:

• Average
  ​2.6kg

Ammunition Type:

• Power Cell
• Gas Canister

Ammunition Capacity:

• Power Cell ( 15 Shots )
• Gas Canister ( 30 Shots )

Reload Speed:

• Average

Effective Range:

• Average
  ​Effective Firing Range: 270 meters

Rate of Fire:

• Low
  ​Semi-Automatic

Stopping Power:

• High

Recoil:

• High

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..:: Special Features ::..
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• Adjustable Weapon-Sling
• Flip-up Rear Sight
• Padded Rifle-Butt

..:: Strengths ::..
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• Durability - The weapon is incredibly durable, capable of being dropped, run over by light weight vehicles, or even caked in mud - and still capable of firing.

• Rapid Cycling - A skilled wielder with this weapon is capable of firing multiple blasts in quick succession. Though not capable of fully automatic firing as seen in many other rifles - if the trigger is fanned quickly enough - the bolts can be fired in rapid succession, thus permitting the greatest amount of fire available to those utilizing this weapon.

..:: Weaknesses ::..
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• Prone to Overheating - Due to its rapid cycling capability, the weapon has a tendency to overheat from quick successive firing. Once it reaches this point, the weapon will often seize up - the trigger locks in place and any attempt to reload the weapon automatically discharges the new power cell.

• Cling - A hold over from its predecessor, the Commenor Series I Blaster Carbine retains the tell tell 'clinging' noise - which happens when the clip is ejected from the weapon. Likewise, it remains difficult to hear on the chaotic and noisy battlefield, though it is enough to notify nearby enemy combatants that the wielder is in the process of reloading their weapon.

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..:: Description ::..
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The Commenor Series I Blaster Carbine is a direct descendant of the Commenor Series I Blaster Rifle - with Sorenn-Syrush Industries intending for the weapon to be produced and supplied to the Commenor Systems Alliance and its affiliated subfactions.

Much of its design is a direct hold over of the predecessor Blaster Rifle, with only minimal changes to the weapon to ensure its continued durability and capabilities on the battlefield. This however means that many of the weaknesses of its predecessor remains with the Carbine. This includes the overheating that plagued the Blaster Rifle when the weapon is rapidly cycled during firing - and though it is much more accurate than the previous blaster rifle - it still has a limit to how far it can fire. Thus those utilizing the weapon have seen that after a handful of shots - roughly six or seven in rapid firing - the weapon both overheats and often must be readjusted in terms of reacquiring a target.

Likewise, the carbine still retains much of its durability and capability of the Blaster Rifle it is designed from.

 

[Iona Immarya]

Under Review.

 

[Iona Immarya]

[member="Amelia Sorenn-Syrush"] Hello there! I will be looking at this sub with you today! You know, on first glance, I think this will be the first time I will say it appears underpowered and could use a bit of beefing up if you wanted to do so but lets take a closer look together.

Ammunition Capacity:

• Power Cell ( 15 Shots )
• Gas Canister ( 30 Shots )

So, this is a really low ammunition count, is there a fluff reason for it? Because I get having a lower ammo count for, say, cutting down weight with smaller cells or having strong individual hits or long range [will discuss range in a later part of the post] so making it hold less, akin to the heavier blaster weaponry, but I feel you are penalizing yourself here.

As your weapon is, right now, you could multiple this ammo count by several magnitudes and I wouldn't bat an eye before slapping my approval button. If you want to keep it low, there is nothing wrong with that as I love the M1 garand vibes I am getting from this thing, as I will discuss later, you even have options to buff other parts of the weaponry which can make that low ammo count fit right at home.

Effective Range:

• Battlefield
  ​Effective Firing Range: 270 meters

You are way overpaying for that range. I've approved blaster rifle subs that had 200 meters as personal. I know you want to cut the range of your last blaster by half to get this one as that is the fluff behind its creation, but battlefield.. that is massively overpaying. For battlefield, you could have a carbine that has the range of a sniper rifle. So, if you want to keep that 'fluff' of it having half the range that is completely fine, but the rating for 270 meters should be Average. For reference, the E-11 had an effective range of 300. Its optimum range was only 100, but you could still threaten someone at 300 easily enough and I wouldn't call the E-11 a particularly long ranged carbine/rifle [was even designed to allow people to fire one handed like yours, so I think its a decent weapon for comparison].

• Cling - A hold over from its predecessor, the Commenor Series I Blaster Carbine retains the tell tell 'clinging' noise - which happens when the clip is ejected from the weapon. Likewise, it remains difficult to hear on the chaotic and noisy battlefield, though it is enough to notify nearby enemy combatants that the wielder is in the process of reloading their weapon.

There is nothing wrong with this, but I wanted to take the time to say that I love this. Whenever I see it in a post and it reloads, I am going to hear that classic sound of the M1 Garand and I love that. Not only is it a great weakness, but it really helps bring the weapon to life. Kudos.

..:: Weaknesses ::..
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• Diminished Range - Unlike its predecessor the Sorenn-Syrush Industries Commenor Series I Blaster Rifle, the Commenor Series I Blaster Carbine has a substantially lesser range - nearly half that of its predecessor blaster.

This isn't really a weakness. Not being 'as good' as another weapon isn't, itself, a negative.

• Prone to Overheating - Due to its rapid cycling capability, the weapon has a tendency to overheat from quick successive firing.

What happens when it overheats? Does the gun go into a safety mode and not let the person fire? If so, how long is this cooling period? Or can they fire and risk barrel melting which can lead to other nasty mishaps?

Overall, outside of needing a bit of clarity for the overheating and removal of the weakness that isn't really a weakness [it would find its home in the description though as it is part of the weapon that is useful to note], there is nothing wrong with your gun. If you clear that up, I can slap an approval on it and get you moving on your way, but I would feel wrong if I didn't mention that you are overpaying in many areas that you don't need to be paying in.

Some suggestions:

• Buff the range to Battlefield rating level.
• Double the range and set to 'Very Long'
• Drop the range to Average and keep your listed range then use that to buff other areas such as stopping power or cut down on size and weight to make it more compact, do what you want with it.
• Depending on what you do [if you want to buff the damage and range you can keep the ammo the same], increasing the ammo capacity isn't a bad idea because your weapon has very low ammo capacity and I don't see any reason for why it is this way.

These are just my suggestions, you are welcome to leave it the same or make up your own ideas for how you want to bring it up in strength, but I would feel like I wasn't doing my job if I didn't tell you how you are overpaying for this weapon in its current state.

EDIT: Also, in your tags, I need you to edit in your company tier.

 

[Amelia von Sorenn]

Edited

• Range set to Average
• Stopping power bumped up to High
• Recoil bumped up to High
• Expanded on Overheating Weakness
• Added company tier in tags

Going to keep the ammunition count down due to wanting to keep it close to the M1 Carbine style

[member="Iona Immarya"]

 

[Iona Immarya]

Awesome. Pending Factory Mentor Review.

[member="Jamie Pyne"], [member="Nadja Keto"], [member="Taryc Ap'Irae"]

 

[Zef Halo]

Approved.