Serena Bouie / Wren - critique

[Darth Ren Malgus]

Serena has been around a little while now and reached out to many different writers. I am now curious what others think of her as a character. Her bio has not quite been updated yet but almost there.

She is the only other Jedi character I have written, and I have tried to give her a different personality from the one I've written for a lifetime. I'm interested in knowing how she is received.

 

[Darth Ren Malgus]

Bump

 

[Connor Harrison]

[member="Serena Bouie"]

Serena, as one who has written with you, I can offer this - but first, as I know how you are, it's very important this isn't taken as anything other than a simple observation and thought on my behalf. Ok?

You're a very good writer, and your ability to want to craft stories is commendable. You have lots of passion and enthusiasm, and that is great to see. However I feel you build up personal walls and defences OOC, and you take things that happen on the board very personally, almost as if other writers / characters are working against you.

Lots of your ideas have worked, some haven't - but that's normal, it happens with me and everyone else. The main thing is don't take things to heart here. You can be very paranoid that people are ignoring you or don't like you or your character or ideas and that's when I want to shake you because that is when you lose your muse and patience.

Don't be so hard on yourself, and don't try TOO hard to create stories and journey's for Serena that are planned out so much, because if they don't go to plan then it's no big deal. Just go with the flow, as it comes, and don't try to plot her future too hard. I tried that with Connor, and it didn't work and I found myself losing muse for a character not going where I wanted. Take away the expectation and then you'll enjoy her so much more.

As I said, you're a very good writer and I hope to see more of your confidence back in your writing and more fun in your stories, rather than ones that reflect your feeling of loss or isolation here in OOC.

Keep up the good work and don't let the negative outweigh the many positives.

 

[Kei Amadis]

[member="Serena Bouie"]

Is a fantastic shovel keeper.

First note - Its a pleasure writing with you. Fun and good natured OOC and your characters have a lot of distinction IC which is one of the marks of a great writer, but if this is about Serena as a character:

I've only known her as Wren so bear that in mind - Reflective, feels like she is seeking something and she doesn't know what it is yet, enduring in that she won't give up on someone easily, and wants to see that same quality in others. Cute nose, Kei muse thinks so. I love how she has a grasp of the simple things in life, the things people take for granted, and what they mean in the wider context of life. She's the girl next door of the starwars universe, and that can be really appealing when so much of what we write is laser beams and starships.

 

[Darth Ren Malgus]

Thank you both for your input. I was really looking for critique of Serena as a character. But at least now everyone who takes time to read this will know that as a writer I'm. Paranoid. Lol.

I know that can be a turn off for many as no one wants to deal with that.

But on an up note I'm glad to be thought of as a good writer.

Again thank you. I always appreciate honesty.

 

[Kei Amadis]

[member="Serena Bouie"]
You are ace as a writer , i've always enjoyed our chats. The characters and stories we have going on are just fun, but yep back to the Serena scheduled feedback!