Roots

[Trextan Voidstalker]

It was ten minutes before he stood up. He looked towards the direction Choli had left in and took a step in that direction.

Hooo?

“R4 asks if that is really a good idea?” Vee translated in his clipped tone. A droid could convey quite a lot of information in binary and one needed a good ear for it. Trextan had never even put his mind to the idea of learning it.

“Does he?” Trextan asked, turning towards the pebble drone. R4 didn't shake his head or even make a sound. He just looked straight back at him. “No. Right.”

Trextan sat back down again and sighed. Normally he was presented with a problem that could be fixed. Like his father in that situation he just picked a path and got on with it.

In this situation he was entirely lost for what he could do to make amends. Her mind was her own.

To keep his mind busy he took the tube from his belt. It wasn't quite complete. The crystal was in place, the power cell anchored to the bottom. He couldn't even recall doing that. All that was left was finishing the emitter assembly and ensuring the focusing lenses were without flaw. But he knew that right now he wasn't in the right frame of mind for it. It took a great deal of concentration.

At that thought he felt a bubble if resentment towards her for ruining this. That anger that had been cultivated for so many years threatened to escape from the place it was buried.

He cast an apologetic glance in the direction Choli had left, even though she wasn't listening to his thoughts. It was his fault. That rankled but he could put himself in her shoes and see why she had reacted so.

He just wished he had thought of going to explore the rest of the cave to give himself something else to do.

 

[Choli Vyn]

[member="Trextan Voidstalker"]

[SIZE=9pt]It didn’t take an hour to realize that there was nothing else in this cavern system. Truth be told, it wasn’t much of a cavern system to begin with. Frustration and unspent energy went zipping through her veins. It was a state of mind that the Rogue wasn’t fond of. Nothing frustrated her more than not being in control of a situation. She was always so focused and once she decided on a path, she kept on it. Granted, it left her with times where she would race with both feet before looking. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]If Choli spent a few moments considering how there were times where she’d do the same as Trextan, she’d realize there was no sense in casting stones. However, that was the learning process to such growing pains. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]Standing along an outcrop, Choli found herself blankly staring at the few halo chem lights she’d tossed around the area for illumination. She wasn’t stupid so as to go spelunking without proper gear or tools, but she wasn’t in the right frame of mind to pay particular attention to the finer details. Fifteen minutes into her scouting, the bulk she found were petrified feces and a few old bones from whatever critters had been left behind. While the shallow cavern system provided a measure of protection from the elements, it wasn’t as extensive so as to fulfill the purpose of a proper habitation. That they were able to easily find it meant that others would as well. Even in the dim light, she could tell there had been other who had used this same system much like Trextan and she. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]The young woman felt her fingers curl within her palms. They flexed in and out in tune to her breath, lazy floating particles flying in front of her goggles. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]It was annoying. Annoying how she felt stupid as well as angry with Trextan. Part of her wanted to tell him what he did wrong, how [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]reckless [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]it was. Another simply wanted to busy herself and get this done with. The turbulent emotions of a teenager in the stirrings of emotional investment with a boy she felt attracted to clashing with the no nonsense tracker raised to be a Tusken Raider. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]A few more seconds went ticking by. Her racing thoughts eventually culminated into a singular purpose. When had she ever not spoken her mind?[/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]So it was with yet another purposeful stride that the girl spun on her heel and turned back towards their camp. Not twenty minutes since Choli left than Trextan would hear the determine crunch of Choli’s boots drawing near. [/SIZE]

 

[Trextan Voidstalker]

As just a few more minute passed his spirit began to sink. This was going to be the end of everything between them, he taunted himself. She was going to part ways with him back at the town and that would be that. Even when he'd been lonely or bored or exhausted and hurting he had known she might come in range soon for a holo chat to brighten his day. How different would it be without that?

Trextan traced little patterns into the sand with the heel of his boot. It was like a rollercoaster. He'd been at the weightless peak before dropping to the lowest point. Now he was levelling out. Trextan closed his eyes and ignored an inquiring note from R4.

“My emotions don't rule me,” he whispered to himself. It was much easier for any teenager to say that actually live by. He didn't subscribe to the philosophy that there should be no emotion. Sometimes he could wish them away, but he couldn't imagine a world without them.

His head snapped up as he sense Choli approach before he heard her footsteps. She had said an hour, had it been that long? In some ways it had felt that long. The storm still howled, even angrier than before. Tumultuous inside and out.

He stood up to face her. R4 did a nervous wobble on the spot.

“It wasn't just about the crystal,” he said. Realising he's barely mumbled the words he spoke up. “This trip, it wasn't just about that.” he tried to keep the emotion from his voice but it wavered at the start and a bitter note crept in at the end.

 

[Choli Vyn]

[member="Trextan Voidstalker"]

[SIZE=9pt]The wavering of Trextan’s tone at the end might as well have been lost with the howl of the overhead storm. In between his fluctuating murmur and the force of nature in both a literal and metaphorical sense, it was hard enough already to pick up on tone. Body language was everything, and in the growing sphere of blue with Choli storming back, even in the receding shadows there was much to glean from it. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]As expected, Choli didn’t even focus on the crystal. What this trip was at the onset or in its execution had little relevance to the Rogue at the present time. Or at least, that's what she told herself. It weighed heavily on this trip and what it meant to spend time with Trextan, but Choli was still coming to terms with that. For what she could not understand or was lost in confusion and frustration for his safety made her latch on what she [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]did [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]know, and could understand; that he had been reckless with his life in heading off into that storm. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt][ Do you know how to survive in the desert? [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]] the first inquiry was sent the Jedi’s way through the filter of her breathing mask in that stern metallic drone. It was Choli as much as it was not hearing that question come from her then whenever she spoke through that gunmetal grey apparatus that shielded the lower half of her face. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt][ Do you know which creatures are poisonous? Which will kill you? How to track their tracks?][/SIZE][SIZE=9pt] came another, and before Trextan could utter another word she followed with a rapid attack, each emphasized by each purposeful step towards him. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt][ Do you know how to search for water? Forage for food? What is safe to eat what is not? How about how many days you can last out in the Wastes before you die of sunstroke, dehydration, or sustenance? Do you know how to recognize the landmarks? ] [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]five meters out. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt][ Or how to spot sharpshooters in the canyon? Or where to seek shelter during high noon? ][/SIZE][SIZE=9pt] three meters and every step in the way her robes shuffled around her and in her full shroud that covered every inch of skin only seemed to make her even more menacing. R4 knew better than to even utter a ‘hoo’ then, his ocular sensor widening as the event played out. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt][ Do you know how to survive in a sandstorm? How it can disorient you in mere minutes and block your sight, plug your nostrils, and bury you alive??][/SIZE][SIZE=9pt] Two meters. One. Choli would not stop. Much like the sandstorm that had overtaken them above ground, the young woman stepped right into Trextan’s personal space and kept moving forward. Her hand came up, intending to push at his chest if he did not move. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt][ Do you have [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]any[/SIZE][SIZE=9pt] idea the millions of ways you can [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]die[/SIZE][SIZE=9pt] out there on your own?!][/SIZE][SIZE=9pt] at this distance, even the filter on her breathing mask couldn’t hide the metallic coat of vexation Choli delivered then. [/SIZE]

 

[Trextan Voidstalker]

He didn't move out of the way. In fact he took a step closer and pushed back against the hand she planted to shove him aside. He had thought maybe his comment would be the end. That she would quietly admit that she understood but that he needed to be more careful next time.

But then that would not have been Choli.

Now Trextan felt as if he was being challenged and some part of his stirred and refused to back down just yet. Even though he knew he was in the wrong he held that unreadable stare from the set of goggles.

“I don't know any of those things!” He said in an exasperated tone, shaking his head. If he had been outside of his body he might have wondered why exactly he was standing his ground when he was agreeing with her.

“I do know I shouldn't have gone off without you. I wasn't thinking right, following some damned imaginary Krayt dragon off into the wastes in a daydream. I know I put myself at risk…” this time his voice faltered slightly. The hand on his chest made some ground and he gave a few inches away.

He canted his head to one side a fraction. “And I know I didn't want to frighten you. Or disappoint you.”

That was the heart of the matter. That was what hurt most. That he had lost some amount of her respect. Because he hadn't respected her.

“Take your mask off if you're going to keep telling me off.”

He held firm against her, even edging slightly closer

 

[Choli Vyn]

[member="Trextan Voidstalker"]


[SIZE=9pt]One part of Choli’s mind had decided that she’d feel better if Trextan admitted that he didn’t know any of those things. Reality, on the other hand, didn’t cover it. She felt no victory, just frustration lined with disappointment. Perhaps that was the root of the matter. That he would be so reckless with his own life. One that Choli found herself increasingly attached to. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]Of course, then Trextan had to mention an imaginary Krayt Dragon. It was hard to focus on the rest of what came next after that. A more sensible Choli might have appreciated it. This one, well, mentioning a Krayt Dragon was enough to send chills of alarm down her spine. Most hunters would strive to bring down a Krayt Dragon as evidence of their successful bloodrite; but few very rarely were successful. Most ended up nothing but bleached bones in the Wastes. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt][ A [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]what?!] [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt] never mind the request to take her mask off if she was going to continue her tirade. Perhaps there were somethings that one shouldn’t completely divulge. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt][ You were following a [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]Krayt Dragon!!!??][/SIZE][SIZE=9pt] Now her voice hitched in volume and incredulity. [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]Just how stupid can he — [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]Choli felt the push back of her hand by his chest, the step forward Trextan had taken to edge closer. He might be a Jedi Knight but he was still every bit an emotional teenager. The Jedi Order couldn’t grow him out of that with all the classes in the galaxy. Only time did that. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]Even behind her swaddling of scarves, goggles, and that breathing mask, there was no mistaking the jutting of her chin. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt][ Do you have [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]any[/SIZE][SIZE=9pt] idea just what they are capable of [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]doing[/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]?!] [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]ugh, so was so upset. Livid now. Alarm, worry, frustration and incredulity all rolling into a chaotic ball of emotions that Choli had no idea how to even channel. Instead it went bubbling down her arms, moving in a forceful shove against his chest as if the very act would knock some sense into him. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]Nevermind the [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]imaginary[/SIZE][SIZE=9pt] part of it. Or the fact that Trextan had already admitted he was wrong. That he had not wanted to disappoint her or make her worry. Yet that was the thing, learning how to handle the sudden well of concern over another and how to process that relief. Even if right now all she wanted to do was to knock him in the head at this stupid antics and the Jedi ways and the Force that could have possibly sent him to his death. [/SIZE]

 

[Trextan Voidstalker]

That shove triggered a surge of annoyance. He took a small step that placed his foot halfway between them. The shoulder rolled back forwards after recoiling from her shove he put his weight against her hand again. He gripped the robes on her forearm with but didn't tug her hand away from himself yet.

It upset him to see her quite so angry at him. What he should have done was try and find that calm that he had settled into in the wastes. Found balance. But he cared too much and she stirred all kinds of emotions that he wasn't adept at dealing with. At his age he should have been better. Like her, he had notbeen through a traditional or stable childhood. He had a lot to learn beyond the Force and how to use it.

“No, I didn't! And I know they're dangerous!” He sounded even more testy now. He gave a tug at her arm and it slipped up towards his shoulder so he could lean closer.

“It led me out there, it wasn't… it wasn't real.”

His eyes narrowed and then looked away. It was as if he had just heard his own words. His expression shifted through several different emotions.

“Can I...try and explain this better?” For the first time since she had returned he didn't look sure of himself.

 

[Choli Vyn]

[member="Trextan Voidstalker"]


[SIZE=9pt]By now R4 began to slowly roll away from the pair. He should have followed Vee Three earlier but he had thought it would spill over and be done with. That and he was nosy. Now, however, the extent with how much his mistress was upset was enough to warrant the Pebbledrone to ease off and join the scouting droid. Well at least until he felt he had to shoot both Trextan and Choli with the paddlebeamer if this really escalated. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]Choli did not notice R4 rolling away, her attention was solely fixated on the Jedi Knight in front of her. Had she removed the goggles and the breathing mask as requested, Trextan would have witnessed the way her eyes were twin orbs of deep gold that melted into a pure copper of incredulity, only to blaze aggravation akin to the Twin Suns at the confession that the Krayt Dragon wasn’t real. Hearing it aloud was enough for both of them to recognize how ridiculous it sounded. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]Trextan was taller than Choli, but she wasn’t lacking in height or strength herself. So while Trextan pressed back onto her hand, gripping at the fabric where her forearm lay, she couldn’t help the incessant desire to shove at him again. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]It would have been a good idea to let Trextan explain himself. To try and bridge the gap of confusion and miscommunication that had brought them into this situation to begin with. However, even Trextan couldn’t deny how it came across when he began to try to explain. For the first time he took his gaze off of her, struggling between control of his emotions, the discovery of the crystal, his Jedi teachings, and how this has not gone to plan on how he’s wanted this excursion to be like. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]However, it wasn’t just Trextan trying to figure this all out. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt][Explain [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]what?[/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]][/SIZE][SIZE=9pt] that breathing mask filtered her voice with that increasingly annoying voice modular. The robes, the goggles, the very breathing apparatus that Choli used out in the Wastes to hide her identity and gender was working a little [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]too [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt] well. It gave the Rogue one extra layer between them that she was unconsciously utilizing as that barrier that without it, would reveal that all of this was because she cared. There would be no hiding what she felt with her eyes. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt][That you went out into a sand storm by yourself just because you were following a Krayt Dragon that wasn’t even [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]real?![/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]] [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]when one summed it up that way, it did fall rather flat on the ears. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]This time, the subsequent shove would be enough to potentially rock Trextan on his feet. They were mere inches apart. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]Did he not realize he could have died and I’d have no way of finding him?! [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]Outside the storm surged. [/SIZE]

 

[Trextan Voidstalker]

[member="Choli Vyn"]

He could have laughed at that moment. If she hadn't pushed him he might have done. Saying it out loud again was just too much. It had all felt so right. The world have given back after he had restored balance. Give and take. His old lightsaber was now deep beneath the dunes. But explaining it out loud just didn't quite work.

And then she pushed him again.

They had beaten him sometimes. Down below the statues of ancient sith lords they broke children down to rebuild them into pawns for the powerful to line up against the Light. They'd hit him when he had been exhausted just to make sure he would lash out until the very last of his strength failed.

He didn't lash out. Not quite. It would have sealed an end to the relationship that was only just beginning. The Trextan who had fought at Kaeshana might have. But he had been through a lot since then. All of it culminating in releasing a dark core of his anger out in the wastes. In accepting that the goals he had constructed that lightsaber for were not his own. That the rage was no longer his.

He was still a teenager full of hormones and a myriad of conflicting emotions. He rolled his shoulder away from her shove but was still pushed back. She wasn't playing this time. He yanked her arm away with the grip he had and stepped back in. He grunted as their arms tangled but he moved quickly, the Force still there with him.

There was nothing gentle about the way he yanked her mask away from her face and pushed into her. As he did that his artificial hand still had an unbreakable grip on the fabric around her forearm keeping it held out to the side, slightly behind her. Anger was just kept in check, but he was tall and strong now, looming over her.

“Look at me!” He demanded. He was breathing sharply. She had a grip on him with her other hand and was probably going to shove him back away again in disgust. At this distance she was probably more dangerous than he was.

Even in the dim light he could see the swirling colours in her eyes. She did look angry. But she also looked fragile. He hadn't seen her look like that for a long time. Not since that silly boy-man had followed her impulsive charge out of the hospital.

“I'm sorry,” it was a whisper as his eyes searched hers for something. Even as she pushed at him again he leaned his weight against her and pressed his lips hard to hers.

R4 turned his optics in the other direction, waiting for the sound of a foolish teenage boy being tossed to the ground.

 

[Choli Vyn]

[member="Trextan Voidstalker"]

[SIZE=9pt]It all happened so fast. The grunt as Trextan firmly locked her arm in place, the grip no longer the playful, silly one from hours before. Choli knew that the Jedi could move swiftly. She’d seen him do so on Skor when he fought the Graug then. The only difference being that this time, that speed was used against her. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]Choli barely had enough time to register when tug and lock of her arm had her crashing against his chest when she felt the sharp bite of the straps of her goggles and rebreather against the back of her head and along her ears. The remnants of them hung along her neck, that cloth and metal barrier no longer between them. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]Maybe it was the shock of him actually ripping it off of her face that stunned her. Or maybe it was the way she couldn’t avoid his probing, narrowed gaze without the filter of her goggles. The shock of surprise along with alarm painted one of the few clues into her psyche a tumultuous viridian hue flecked by gold, a kaleidoscopic well of emotions Choli couldn’t contain. Maybe that’s why he’d demanded she look at him. Maybe he [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]knew[/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]Her dark hair was a wild mess where it poked out of her scarf, framing how large her eyes were, nostrils flaring as if the act of would hide the fragile edge to her expression. There were already red welts where the tugging of the straps bit her olive skin, but she didn’t have a chance to act in turn. Both of them were already breathing hard, hearts racing, equally feeling tested and vexed by the other. As Trextan had thought, her hand did clamp down against his shoulder, body surging against him, chest to chest. This wasn’t horseplay. This wasn’t a game. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]So he only confused and stunned her all the more when his head came darting down, both of their breaths straining as if sharing the same air, and Trextan gave that hoarse apologetic whisper. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]I’m sorry[/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]Choli could feel the intensity of his stare piercing through the grime of her face without that last veil of anonymity. It was hard enough to keep her gaze on him then, unable to deny one simple truth. He [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]meant[/SIZE][SIZE=9pt] it. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]Then he kissed her. He kissed her hard without finesse but surging with intensity. It wasn’t gentle, it wasn’t full of hesitation. It held no similarity to the tentative press he’d given her at Mon Isla the night before. No, he channeled his own method of trying to get through to the Rogue as she had tried with her earlier aggravated shoves. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]The shock of it made Choli suck up air through her nose, stunning her momentarily. The hand at his shoulder had her fingers uncurl back surprise, the action throwing her off. Was he [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]really[/SIZE][SIZE=9pt] doing this?! Yes he was, and it only ignited another rush of emotions. Half of her wanted to shove him against the wall, to yell at him and ask what was he thinking?! Another couldn’t help the sudden surge that went flooding her veins, the tiniest of inklings that suggested she might even [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]like[/SIZE][SIZE=9pt] this. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]The former won out. Breathing heavily against Trextan, the girl attempted to struggle against his hold, but only succeeded in moving her leg between his, intending to shove him back against the wall. This gave her a bit more leverage, but only resulted in shoving herself more into his embrace; lips uncoupled and Trextan would feel a slight pinch where the act prompted a cut on his lower lip as they stumbled together. He still had her own arm locked against her back. She wasn’t moving. Not unless she made him. And oh was it [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]tempting[/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]Through it all, it wasn’t disgust on her face nor even hate. Just a confounded medley of anger, hurt, and underlying all that, genuine concern. All riding the frustrating surge of hormones that made Choli want to slam Trextan along the cavern wall to yell at him some more as much as to kiss him. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]But it was that earlier apology, before the kiss, the one that [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]finally[/SIZE][SIZE=9pt] managed to cut through her anger, that had her closing her eyes and taking a deep breath even as they stood there like two churning tempests just ready to blow. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]“You could have [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]died[/SIZE][SIZE=9pt] in that storm.” Her chest rose and fell sharply as if the very words were hard for her to say. There was no rebreather to filter out her voice, to hide the how much it affected her. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]“And I—“ her voice cracked. That olive face twisted, brows scrunching forward. The rest echoed Trextan’s low whisper from before. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]“—I’d have no way of finding you.”[/SIZE]

 

[Trextan Voidstalker]

That hurt. More than any accusation or admonishment. That sent a twisting pain shooting through his gut. It was far worse than the hot sting on his bottom lip where a tiny droplet of blood welled up. He saw them the future she had seen for herself. Waiting for the storm to dissipate and then wondering the sands fruitlessly. The search for her old family and now her first kiss just a hopeless search through the wastes she had been raised in.

He had made her think those thoughts. She hadn't been listing those dangers to win an argument, she'd been mentally checking off all the ways she had thought he could have died. The Force was his guide, but out here she was his only hope.

They were on the edge. In more ways than one. Where her leg was and his weight sat she could have twisted and out him on his back. When he tried to adjust his stance he felt himself give way, quick steps keeping him.upright before his back struck the stone wall.

She was still looking at him like that. Her weight pinning him in place.

“Every time I hear of a skirmish on our borders I go and pace because you could have been shot down again.” His voice quivered now, but he held her gaze. “But I have to trust you're in your element. I've seen you fly, you're brilliant.”

They stood before each other more exposed than if they had disrobed. Nothing held back.

“This isn't my element and I trusted you to keep me safe. I don't always control what the Force shows me or how it guides me but it won't happen again.”

His prosthetic hand released her arm. His other hand now pulled her tight. Instead of wanting to shove her back he wanted to embrace her until the pain went away. He would have tucked her in against him perhaps, but that would have just smothered her in the unpleasant scent of his secondhand robes.

Instead he held his prosthetic hand up, palm towards her, showing it wasn't an aggressive gesture any more. His fingers ran through those wayward strands to tuck them back and then adjusted the straps of her goggles so they no longer caught on her ear. Just that simple gesture seemed to turn down the flames on which all his emotions seemed to be burning brightly on.

 

[Choli Vyn]

[member="Trextan Voidstalker"]

[SIZE=9pt]There was the briefest delay in between Trextan's release of her arm and when his hand rose to her face as if approaching a wary creature that could lash out at any moment. Likely this was due to his somewhat unexpected reaction to yanking Choli's mask off. He knew he'd been the aggressor in that, but at the same time, Choli wasn't blameless either. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]A lump that had been forming in the Rogue's throat gave a bob, eyes wide as she watched Trextan's hand approach. His prosthetic fingers ever so gingerly went brushing aside the wayward tendrils from her eyes, a stark contrast to his assertiveness before. No, this was the teenager again, pummeled by a myriad of emotions laid bare by them both. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]The red welts were a little more visible on her skin now, but nothing that Choli would bother with. He hadn't meant to harm her, just get her attention. To stop her incessant onslaught before it escalated any further. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]Even now, it felt as if her heart was about to burst. There was an ache there, an unfamiliar pang that Choli was barely starting to work through. As Trextan’s fingertips went brushing one more time through her hair, Choli shut her eyes. The ragged breath brought with it the fine grains of sand and the worst of the smells for them both, but she didn’t care. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]Her head fell forward, forehead managing to bounce along his collar bone. The hand that could have pushed him into the trip instead went curling inward, fingers clutching at the fabric there. At her back, she felt the tightening of his grip, flexing to draw her closer. Uncertain what to do.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]A single muffled word managed to float up from Choli. It might have taken a second to register, but after everything, ironic in its delivery.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]“[/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]Idiot[/SIZE][SIZE=9pt].”[/SIZE]

 

[Trextan Voidstalker]

He genuinely wasn't sure what to do. He thought of how Adele would provide a suitable proverb at times of high emotion. He suspected if he did that he was going to get a swift punch to the gut.

“I know,” he replied softly. His voice wobbled as he spoke and he fell entirely silent afterwards. All that pent up emotion was still there but with no outlet now there weren't raising their voices and shoving each other. That probably wasn't a healthy way to express his feelings, he thought to himself.

But as he cradled her against him that knot in his stomach started to slowly unwind. He felt a dull throb behind his eyes. He closed them tightly shut and hoped he wouldn't start crying in front of her. It would have seemed a bit too much after she was the one who had a reason to be upset.

In a moment of clarity he realised she was probably going through the same. At times she felt like a creature he could never understand. Especially when hidden behind her robes and mask. But most of the time they really wanted the same things, felt the same things.

Feeling a little quiver in her breathing he tightened his grip just a fraction before relaxing again. Just to let her know he was still there. As if she wouldn't know that pressing him against the cave wall.

“I'm sorry for pushing you and yanking on your mask,” he said after a little while. Through the faltering storm of mixed emotions, that guilt percolated to the surface.

 

[Choli Vyn]

[member="Trextan Voidstalker"]

[SIZE=9pt]That brought a slight shake of Choli’s shoulders; it was a muffled laugh. The irony of it all was that it had been Choli who had begun the quarrel. Although in her mind, entirely warranted at the time. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]“Yeah well, I was the one who started pushing you around to begin with.” she admitted, giving a sigh. She still had her head tucked alongside his collarbone, breathing in the scent of the sand and grime that had caught on his robes during his earlier walk. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]Despite the situation calming down, there was still a sense of unspent energy that ran through Choli’s veins. That rush of adrenaline that their escalating argument had nurtured. Her hands gave a slight tremble that she managed to stop by gripping onto his robes a little tighter. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]Nevermind that she was still pinning him against the wall. Or was that him? It was hard enough to say. Plus that kiss…[/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]Warmth rushed her face. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]Why did he even do that?[/SIZE]

 

[Trextan Voidstalker]

As she took a tighter grip of his robes he loosened his own grip around her. She was quite tall for a girl, he thought suddenly. With big desert boots on she couldn't have been such shy of six feet tall.

He had been quite aware of all her physical attributes for some time now. But holding her for so long whilst they both stood together made it more apparent. It was a nice, mundane thing to think about as the overwhelming tide of emotions ebbed away.

The closest he could think of was letting the lactic acid burn fade after a heavy run. On Coruscant they had wound him up far beyond this. Rather than let him cool off slowly they had then taught him to harness the emotional power, to use it to cause destruction.

Could I have hurt her? That was a sobering thought. He quickly realised that he wouldn't have. Perhaps he might have shoved back eventually but he didn't think he could have hurt her no matter how wound up her became.

He gripped a little tighter again.

There was a lot he wanted to say. He wanted to tell Choli that he should not have escalated the situation and that he had let his emotions get the better of him. That he knew she was frightened and angry and why she had reacted like that.

Unfortunately he just mumbled “I made it worse.” Despite the day old sweat and much older scents on robes he rubbed his cheek against the top of her head.

 

[Trextan Voidstalker]

.

 

[Choli Vyn]

[member="Trextan Voidstalker"]

[SIZE=9pt]Did he? Choli wasn’t sure. Likely he meant because of his jedi training and how they taught him to act in those situations. However, this wasn’t a Jedi temple or mission and Choli was no Jedi. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]Would he be bothered by that? Another concern to fret about at another tim[/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]e. It [/SIZE][SIZE=9pt]didn’t really matter now. Choli let out another heavy breath. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]“It’s fine.” She said, wondering if she should pull away now? Unsure, and deciding that it would be best to err on the side of cutionaution, she began to pull away, loosening her grip so that Trextan would be able to push off the wall. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=9pt]“Sorry,” came her own abashed apology. [/SIZE]

 

[Trextan Voidstalker]

They had met in a hospital and since then he had spent plenty of time worrying about her health. It was almost as if that first meeting set the precedent for what followed.

Trextan still didn't think that what he had done had been unsafe. The Force had been protecting him. But he had broken a promise to her and left her to worry. If she had headed out into that fierce storm he would not have imagined she could have survived. It would have been like arriving in a hangar to find she'd taken a wallowing shuttle out to try and fight off a wing of TIE fighters.

He had to brace one hand against the wall to push himself up straight. Her exotic eyes were just inches from his own. Emotional turbulence splashed out in full colour. Her eyes looked like he felt.

He had to touch her. Glove fell to the floor and his real hand brushed against her cheek. After the way they'd handled each other roughly - and not in the playful way - it seemed important to make that gentle, affectionate touch. It seemed to ease the tension more effectively than time alone.

 

[Choli Vyn]

[member="Trextan Voidstalker"]


Choli felt her eyes widening a bit. Not in alarm or wariness, but just at the contact. Maybe it was seeing how Trextan had taken the time to slip the glove of his hand. Or maybe it was the way that it then gingerly went to brush her cheek, thumb grazing against the fine grit that had been caught there. Or maybe, just maybe, it was the way he was looking at her then. As if every single confusing emotion she was feeling inside. A mirror of herself. It was every bit as strange as it was confusing. Choli wasn’t sure how to react. Yet as the seconds went ticking past, she felt each stroke of his caress calm her a bit. This whole deal with touching and being so close was still so very new to her, and there was plenty that she still had to learn. But it was nice. Well, in so far where they were at right now.

That knot rose in her throat again, and her shoulders rose as she took a deep breath. There were plenty of paths that the Rogue could take that made her feel assured. This one was still up in the air, especially when it dealt with the teenage Jedi. Not to mention everything else that came in between.

Her eyes fell, only to rise again. Now what? “I guess…” she began, uncertain. What was she supposed to say?

R4 chose that moment to be interject. Maybe he was aware of the moment. Or maybe he was glad choli wasn’t going to drop Trextan on his back anytime soon. At the very least, a hoo beep hoo broke the tension.

Choli swung her gaze over towards the direction of the droid. Mild annoyance returned to her expression.

“No, Arr Four, I’m not going to beat him up anymore.”

 

[Trextan Voidstalker]

Trextan aimed an accusatory glare at R4. It vanished quickly as Choli looked back towards him. Just a few minutes ago he had been in the most peaceful moment of his life. How had they ended up fighting and then running out of steam so quickly. He felt embarrassment as much as anything. Why had he made it worse?

There was no good reason to. Trextan looked down at the floor. His emotions could still rule him. He could hear Jacen's voice saying it was just an age thing he would get over, trivialising his issues. He had to push down another swell of anger.

R4 and Vee were both looking at him. This didn't need an audience. We're they waiting for what he said next? They'd both apologised, they'd embraced. What came after that?

Despite it all he smiled. “Please don't.” His expression softened. He could still hear the storm keeping them penned it. It had held them here until frustration boiled over. Would it again?

“Maybe we could just sit a little?”

He breathed without thinking about it for the first time in a few minutes.