Rise

[Jairdain]

It wasn't that Jairdain wasn't a good almost wife or mother, but she felt she needed balance in her life. That remained out of her reach though. She wanted to be more than what she was, but her something held her back. Maybe it was her beliefs, ideals or upbringing.

She had a lovely and simple childhood. Growing up on a world now destroyed and banished from there due to something tragic that had killed quite a few people. Nothing she had anything to do with personally, but her people had branded her guilty at least by association.

The girl had wandered for a few years, working on a freighter and learning of the Jedi. They dropped her off on Voss and her life began anew. She had found a place where she belonged and even love. Her life quickly went awry though and she was taken away. Eventually, she found herself back in the arms of her love and the Silver Jedi.

Life once again took her away from the Jedi and her love. Due to the distances between them, she had given up hope on being with him and had thought she found it again with the man she had been hired to advise. Over the course of a few years that assumed love deepened and grew to the point where the two of them had a son. There was something that kept her from telling Bradshaw about his son though. Once again, life took a man she thought she loved away from her.

Fast forward another few years and her life was in shambles. Losing her position on Commenor, the man she had been engaged to as well as performing murder and losing more than one person she considered a friend, including her first love, she ran. A long period of darkness filled her life and that was something she would rather forget and move beyond. Again, when her clouded mind cleared, she returned to the Silver Jedi.

They weren't the only thing she returned to. It took a bit of working and figuring out, but her first love decided he still loved her. Thinking her life was now secure and her position in life was set, they moved in together. For a while, she was satisfied with being a mother to Marcus. As with Bradshaw, the pair of them had a daughter and named her Nitya. It meant constant or eternal in the language of her people. Perhaps it was a sign from Jairdain that she was still seeking exactly that. Before the two of them actually married, she felt the need to go questing for the "something" she was missing.

Questing might not be the proper word for what she did. Almost without warning, she went into a deep meditation. Having the foresight to know Yuroic would worry about her, she had told him of her plan and arranged for Nitya and Marcus to be cared for when he was busy with his own work duties.

Time passed around the blind seeker. Being lost in her meditation, she had no idea just how much time had passed. Due to her connection with the Force, she had no need to have any medical machines to keep her alive. It was almost as if she had gone into a hibernation, but that wasn't quite it either. She showed signs of life, but would not respond to anything external to her body.

Unaware of how much time had passed, she opened her eyes to find the season outside had changed. Yuroic had been caring enough to make sure she was comfortable and she felt around for her love. Not yet wanting to try and move after being sedentary for so long, she reached out with the Force.

I am awake. Join me if you can.

That was all she said and rested her head on the pillow under it and breathed in the fresh air coming in through the window.

[member="Yuroic Xeraic"]

 

[WelshGuy]

It had been clear to Yuroic for a while that Jairdain was struggling to find the balance in her life that she was so desperate to find. Yuroic was less concerned on balance in the same way that Jairdain was, however, he could understand that this was something important to her. In fact it was crucial for her to understand the balance that she needed and how to achieve that. They had been through a lot, dealing with demons of their past and having to suffer through more than they should.

Yuroic had lost his Master not long after becoming a Jedi Knight, a lost of the closest relationship he had to a parental figure he ever had. There was also the abuse and suffering he had while an abandoned child and then slave on Nar Shaddaa. After he lost his Master, he was dealing with the fact he was an amputee, living isolated in the archives hating the world and hating himself more. He drove his relationships away for awhile before he recovered slowly and began to live his life normally.

Things started to work out well for a short time, he became a Master to a Padawan who later became his daughter due to their close bond. However, Yuroic found his parents who abandoned him years ago, seeing that they were slaves and didn't care about him, Yuroic lost himself to a bloody, brutal and sadistic rage. It lasted for months and when he pulled himself out of the rage, he realised that he was a monster and fled into exile. When he finally felt safe enough to return to the SJO space, Yuroic returned to SJO home. It was difficult to return, many things had changed within the Order and he was not the same man that left. He was torn, broken and terrified of himself.

It finally came to a head when he was on Zeltros and got addicted to spice, his addiction grew till it got out of hand and had to wipe his mind to go clean. Eventually, he regained his memories, fell in love with Jairdain again, grew a family and became the Jedi Master he never thought he would be. A Jedi Master and a member of the Assembly while remaining firmly grey in the Force, it was the balance he needed, he was waking shocked every morning at how lucky his life turned out looking at the struggles he went through. He knew telling the boy who first joined the Order, where he would end up, the disbelief would be sky high.

When Jairdain went into the meditative state, Nitya struggled at first to not see her mother, or to see her mother but not sense anything from her. Nitya got use to the state Jairdain was in, understanding that her mother was still alive but distant for now. Yuroic was just preparing to cook some of the things ready for dinner. Hearing Jairdain's voice in his head, Yuroic was first surprised by it, taken aback and had to place everything he was doing aside. Grabbing a tray with some treats that he had made the previous day, he took them up to Jairdain.

"Morning, urm, yeah, we sort of moved into a proper house outside the Rest since we were running out of space..." Yuroic explained.

[member="Jairdain"]

 

[Jairdain]

It was possible Jairdain knew more about what all Yuroic had gone through than he thought. Some of his past wasn't a book to her, but that was something she felt no need to pry into. If he wanted her know, then he would tell her. However, some of his memories were in her mind as well. One of the drawbacks of some her mental skills she knew. When she took the memories of another person, they stayed in her mind.

Everything Yuroic had done in his dark days, she knew. This went back as far he had asked her to remove and alter them. Due to her own distress at the time, she had failed to utterly take them from him. As time passed, he eventually regained them. Luckily he hadn't been hurt or mad at her for doing what she had. The request to have them wiped had come from him and he took the blame for it.

Both of them had worked things through and wound up here. At the time they met, she had been a simple Jedi Knight and entirely light. Soon after that changed at the hands of Krest. Yuroic had forgiven her for everything she had done under the influence of the dark and welcomed her back. She was very thankful for this.

Time had passed for both of them. He had found his place in life, within the Force and appeared happy with everything. She on the other hand was still searching. He professed understanding and allowed her to do what she needed to do. A part of her felt guilty for leaving him to take care of their daughter and Marcus. Her son was old enough now to have a better understanding of what was going on, but even he still missed his mother.

When Yuroic walked in, her stomach rumbled as the smell of the treats hit her nose. Even if the Force had kept her alive, she still hadn't had anything physical to eat or drink since she went into her meditation.

"Once I'm able to get up and move around again, I hope to get a tour."

She was still laying in the bed and slowly sat up to stretch the muscles in her body that hadn't been used by her. Once she felt confident of being able to sit up, she did that and welcomed her soon to be husband to join her on the bed.

"As crazy as it sounds, I've missed you and everything else. How long was I meditating?"

The answer might be longer than she expected, but hoped it hadn't been too very long. She would be very upset if years had passed and she missed the chance to be with Nitya as she grew up.

[member="Yuroic Xeraic"]

 

[WelshGuy]

Yuroic watched as his partner's energy light up with interest in the food and glass of water that he brought her. He smiles and sits on the edge of the bed, placing the tray on her lap gently. His aura was a pleasant and joyful one, while it had been hard with his significant other gone, he had made sure that the kids did not feel she abandoned them and that they were all still one family. It had only been months but it felt like years since he had last heard Jairdain's voice. Taking a view of her, he didn't answer immediately since he was distracted by just having her around once more.

"Sorry, I am just taking it all in, missed you a lot too. It has been a few months, not too long. You haven't missed anything too major." He reassured Jairdain since he could sense that she had been worried there had been years in her absence but he did feel like an age had passed between them. So much was going on with the Order and with the galaxy at large. "Eat up, you'll need to build up your strength, Nitya is very active at the moment and probably desperate to see you, as is Marcus."

[member="Jairdain"]

 

[Jairdain]

With confident hands, even she was a bit slower than she would have liked, Jairdain started to eat and drink the food he had brought her. Thankfully her sudden waking up hadn't startled him too much and he hadn't broken anything in his rush to join her on the bed. He was just happy to have her back in the land of being awake, aware and alive.

Letting out a sigh of relief when he told her she had been gone only a few months and that nothing major had happened, she was pleased with that. Yuroic might even be able to pick up on that. Touching emotions had not been a strong suit of his when they had met, but she had worked with him on that. Picking them up off others, he might still have a difficult time doing, even if it was from his partner. Though she did not attempt to keep anything from him.

"Are they here?"

At the mention of the children, she looked like she was ready to try and jump out of bed to greet them.

[member="Yuroic Xeraic"]

 

[WelshGuy]

He could sense that she was pleased to have not missed much in her absence. Yuroic smiled, his skills with sensing emotions in others was hard when he started as a Padawan, he had been closed off to the Force and the ability to sense others for a long time. In time and with help from Jairdain as well as others, Yuroic moved past the history he had used to guard himself from others. Since then, his skills in the Force grown exponentially since then and he could easily sense the emotions in others. Perhaps not to the degree that Jairdain could but he was definitely skilled in sensing others.

When she started to get up from the bed, he guided her back into a sitting position. It was still too early to be moving around as she clearly wanted to, her body was still too weak. Yuroic gave a fake hurt look, "am I no longer good enough?" After letting a moment pass, Yuroic smirked and gave short whistle which brought Marcus and Nitya tumbling in and jumping on top of the bed to hug their mother. "I told them to wait for my signal but I knew that they couldn't wait to see for much longer." He smiled as he watched them happily be with their mother.

[member="Jairdain"]

 

[Jairdain]

It really did not take Yuroic much effort to keep her in bed. Those unused muscles were still slow to respond and it would probably take her a few days to really started getting back to normal. Marcus would have a better understanding of this, but Nitya wouldn't.

He gave a whistle after making a slight joke about not being good enough. Shaking her head, it turned when she heard the kids come running in.

They pretty much tackled her and jumped onto the bed with hugs and kisses. Wrapping her arms around each of them, there were a few tears coming out of her eyes. Not of sorrow, but joy. While she had been meditating, she had seen and encountered many things. Jairdain had been searching and some things she had found, other things still eluded her. Knowing it was time to return though, there would be time in the future to quest after the things she was still searching for.

"Mommy missed all of you. I'm back though and won't leave again like that, ever."

Maybe it would prove true and maybe not, but if she had her choice, there never be a need to meditate like that again.

"What have the two of you been doing? How are my little ones?"

Of course, Marcus didn't like being called little, but he really didn't care about that at this moment. After what felt like a lifetime to him, his mother was alive and awake. Not wanting to let go of her, he hung on like a lost child. Nitya was almost the same.

[member="Yuroic Xeraic"]

 

[WelshGuy]

Yuroic watched as the kids jumped on the bed and hugged Jairdain. They had missed her presence deeply, Nitya being too young to understand why her mother wasn't around had been tough to deal with but Marcus was somewhat harder since he didn't understand why both his biological parents had left him. It took longer but he had been able to convince Marcus that Jairdain would return soon, he just needed patience. There had been somewhat hopeful feeling that Yuroic and Marcus would be closer from this, at least Yuroic had hoped that they would be.

Smiling to Jairdain, he let her spent time with the kids as he excused himself to make himself a drink of caf and something small to eat.

[member="Jairdain"]