Star Wars Roleplay: Chaos

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Lead me to Salvation

Lexa nodded, sighing deeply. "Over three years ago, you left me. You told me it was just business, and that you'd let me know when you'd come back. So I waited. After three months of nothing, I couldn't wait anymore. I took what I could carry, and I started trying to track you down. For a long time I found things. Little clues that let me know I was getting closer to finding you. But..... I never did. The trail went cold. I retraced my steps, I searched entire planets without resting. It got to the point where I just started wandering aimlessly, looking for something, anything."

She clenched her fists and looked down. She looked older than she should for a moment. Tired and hollow. "Finally, I took a step back, and looked at myself. What I'd become. A desperate little girl looking for a shard of her shattered little existence. I knew then that I would never find it. You were gone. No amount of searching or crying or seething was going to change that. I woke up. And I fell."

She lifted her gaze back up to him. "I understand why the Dark Side pulls everyone in now. Because all the anger, all the pain, all the torment, all the suffering. No matter how much you hold it back, it will always come back to drown you. And you can either let it kill you, or absorb it, and turn into a monster. So that's what I did, Morna. I became a monster. A cold, unfeeling, uncontrollable monster. I killed. I tortured. I fought. And I craved it more every day. I still do. It felt good...." She disgusted herself with the truth, but she couldn't deny the euphoria she felt when she made the life bleed out of someone.

"It was numb. Dark. Nothing mattered. I didn't even know why I was alive. I didn't want to be. But I didn't want to die. So, I didn't. Then, I met a man on the streets of Coruscant. He had your sword. Your lightsaber. He even had some of your power. His name is Asher Kellan. He told me that you'd been attacked by a Sith, and that he was with you in your dying moments. You did something to him. Gave him a part of your mind, I think. He knew who I was the minute he saw my face. He knew about your holocron. So he brought me here to get it. He... Blames himself for what happened. I did for a little bit, too. Mainly because I..... I wasn't there, with you. I never even got to say goodbye......" Her voice cracked a little. She swallowed, and then chuckled dryly as her eyes teared up. "Damn. I thought I was done crying."

[member="Asher Kellan"]
 
My vision flashed as I watched it all fade away. Slowly I wondered if Morna was wanting me to go and look for this woman. I questioned it somewhat. Debating about wither I should go and ask Morna, the Fire shaper who I stole my powers from, about who this woman was. I took another drag on the cigarette. Debating over and over what I should do or say. Did he even know he was dead? I knew that despite this, Lexa would tell Morna that he died. So I only questioned on when that was....

=================================================================================​
Morna began to weep softly. His soul was within the holocron. Meaning that he too can still feel emotions an pain. albet, only a small amount. He reached out to try and comfort Lexa, only to have his hand pass right through her. His jaw clenched and his eyes shut as he had heard the news of his death. Whoever this young man was, he knew that he was a good man. One that was not to blame for his death. He was not a weak man. If he had the power to convince Morna's wife to return from the Dark Side, as well as have his memories to bring her here, then he would trust him. "Lexa, please don't cry." He tried to console her with words. "Hey hey. I am still here. I can talk to you through this. Though as limited as it is."

It was then when Morna turned around to see the door open, and standing there, was a young man in a denim vest, beanie, sneakers, and semi-ripped jeans. "Who are you?"

=================================================================​
I had made my decision. I rushed into the door to see the man Morna standing, hovering over the ground as a hologram while Lexa was on the bed crying. The words of "Who are you?" reached my ears. I didn't ask him as I returned with my own question, almost yelling and angry, "What the Hell! Why is Lexa Crying? Morna, you better not have done anything or I swear on my life." Morna then looked offended as he tried to explain himself. "She's becoming emotional over my death! I did nothing to my wife! Now tell me who the feth you are and why are you accusing me of causing harm to the woman I love?" I became angry. Both of my hands lit up in fire and smoke that curled around my half closed fists. "My name is Asher Kellan. And I am about to kick your holoenergy ass."

[member="Lexa Imura"],
 
There was too much. Too much anger. Too much pain. Too much conflict. Lexa couldn't take it anymore. She rose with unnatural speed and screamed at the top of her lungs, "ENOUGH!!!" Everything around her began to violently shudder and shake. The air was practically red, as if all of her emotions were being ripped out for the world to see. Her eyes glowed a bright white-yellow as she glared daggers into both of them. "I don't give a Bantha's ass why the hell I'm crying. You two ARE NOT going to fight over me like two little kids! Snap the Feth out of it before I MAKE YOU!" Her voice was strong, and extremely angry.
[member="Asher Kellan"]
 
I could see Morna as he was about to yell back at me when both of us could feel a shiver down our spine when Lexa got up and yelled at us. Wanting us not to fight over something as small as her crying. I stopped myself. Walking towards her, I stumbled with my words. "I'm... I... I'm sorry Lexa." Morna turned to me, His eyes still angry and wanting to test me. He was about to say something but I indicated lexa with my hand. Questioning his motives. He nodded his head and turned to lexa. Waiting for her reply.

[member="Lexa Imura"]
 
Lexa looked at Asher, and then at Morna. A shuddering sigh escaped her, and the tension in the Force subsided. "I don't care. If you two want to kill each other, be my guest..." She scooped up her jacket from the bed and headed to the door, making sure that her shoulder hit Asher's. When she reached the door frame she paused but didn't turn around. "But I'm not gonna sit here and watch." Her voice was hollow and flat. Then, she walked out of the room and went outside.
[member="Asher Kellan"]
 
I tried reaching for her as she passed me, but I let my hand stop. I closed my eyes and turned away as she left. Not saying a word. Slowly I reached up and pulled on the end of my hat. Slinking it down over my face to fall onto the floor. I just stood there as the door slammed shut. I had made Lexa mad. And it was my fault. If I hadn't been at the bar when the Sith came in, then Morna wouldn't have died. I wouldn't have gained these powers. I wouldn't have ever met lexa, nor made her mad at me. Nor would she have known about the holocron that held her now dead husband's last remains of a soul.

I gathered a fire ball in my hands and threw it into the fire place. Sending sparks flying harmlessly into the air. Morna watched me from where he hovered. "You said your name was Asher?" I just sat down and stayed silent in response to him. Wanting so much to just end this all. The guilt of potentially taking a mans life, ruining a woman's and then pissing her off about it. "Asher, Ash, I have never met you. Yet you retain my powers. Is it true that you somehow have my memories?" I slowly nodded. "Then you need to take care of Lexa for me." I shrugged my shoulders. In return he walked over and waved his hand in front of my face.

looking up to him his face was filled with sorrow and guilt as well. "My death has taken a very large toll on Lexa. I know very little of the story on what happened. Nor do I want to. Ash, I want you to take my place." He pointed to the Sith sword that he once owned over my back, "Use that to protect not just yourself, but lexa. She may be a powerful force user. A very independent woman, but she is still a person. She needs someone to converse with. I can't be there for her now. Use my memories to help you become stronger so you can take care of her."

I shook my head. "No Morna you don't get it. I was the cause of your death. You were fighting a Sith and I got in the way. Your moved your attention to me, and in the process got hit with the force. It mortally wounded you. I hindered you from protecting yourself." I grabbed the sword from my back and threw it across the room. Slamming into the fireplace, half of the blade was in the fire, yet would not melt. "How can I protect someone when I can't even stay out of the way." Morna looked at me. Not phased by the fact that when I threw the sword it went right through his body.

"Ash. You have my memories. Look for a reason why you should protect her." my left hand lashed out and picked up the holocron from where it lay on the floor. "I don't deserve the right to be your friend, or Lexa's. Now leave me alone." my hand closed down and the holocron was shut off. making Morna flash with a light into nothing.

"I don't deserve anyone."

[member="Lexa Imura"]
 
Lexa was oblivious to the cold. She was leaned up against the outside wall of the tiny structure, right next to the door. Everything was so screwed up. First, Asher with Morna's memories and powers. Then, Morna still alive in some form in front of her and talking to her. Real, but not real. She didn't know how to feel. Sad, happy, angry, lonely, or nothing at all. She pinched he bridge of her nose and closed her eyes, sighing. Why was it so hard? Why was everything so hard? She hadn't wanted to lash out at the two most important people in her life. She was just driving them further away. She didn't want to be alone. But she no longer remembered how to have friends or companions. She slammed the side of her fist very hard into the wall beside her. Why did she have to screw everything up for herself?
[member="Asher Kellan"]
 
I leaned forward. Leaning my head into my hands with my elbows on my knees. I held my face within my hands. Close to tearing up because if the sins I committed. I didn't believe in a god. There was no higher being that controlled everything. Made us who we are. But right now, I wish I could have someone to have the power to fix this. Turn back time so I would not be at work that day. Maybe.

I did as Morna told me too. I looked through his thoughts. Seeing things over and over. The battles that Morna had won, lost, fought his heart out in. I saw the romance between Lexa and Morna from beginning to end in the matter of a second. I could feel the pain Morna had when he burned his hands and was stuck with black marks for years. Until a woman came and healed him. Fixing his skin to be like new. The time when he had killed his first man, and when he killed his last. All in the span of seconds. I searched, pondered his memories. Trying to find this reason to protect Lexa other than the debt that I had to pay back to the dead man.

I was so mad that I couldn't understand why I could not find the stupid answer. Walking up to the fire, I shoved my hand in. Yet I felt only warmth. I cursed at the powers to limit the pain I would feel from fire. mad and angry. I yelled and screamed as I punched the stones of the fireplace. I kept punching until my hand went numb from the pain. I could feel hot liquid on my arm. Finally looking at it, I saw blood all over my fist and the stone I punched. Drops were on the ground as well.

I reared up my fist again and punched at the wall more. I didn't care that my left hand would probably never be able to use a sword again. Or be able to function properly. I wanted to know why I should fight for Lexa and Morna. let alone myself. I was done punching. Stopping myself, I realized that I had pain. I fell back onto the couch. Sitting there staring at my bloody hand. "I should probably clean that." I spoke to myself. I breathed in softly. Wanting nothing more to be a simple man. A simple young man that has a girlfriend who cares more about what color of clothes she will wear, rather than if her boyfriend will ever come back home. A man where I can sit at home and watch the game while my wife makes dinner. A simple man that reads bedtime stories to his children. I felt as though I have already felt this before.

I closed my eyes and looked through Morna's memories again. Not in anger, but in wonder and passion. I search and I found what I needed. I smiled. Seeing it now. Softly I spoke, "You little bastard you." Morna knew what it was. He wanted it as well. he never finished it because of his short life. So I will finish it for him.

Standing up, I used one of morna's shirts to cover my hand. it was black to hide the blood, And wrapped it around my hand. Walking towards the door, I reached with my right hand. And stopped. Was I really ready to do this? would I be able to accomplish this goal? I closed my eyes. Even if I didn't it would help the next generation of those who wanted it as well. I opened the door, Speaking out, "Lexa."

[member="Lexa Imura"],
 
Lexa vaguely wondered what was the reason behind Asher's screaming and the pounding coming from inside. Perhaps Morna had angered him even further. Perhaps he had just flipped out from his own thinking. She didn't know. But the sound of his screaming and the intensity of his pounding... It worried her. She didn't want him to get hurt. The feeling was unexpected, but unable to be ignored. Her gaze locked on the door when the sounds finally ceased. What was happening? Had he... No. No, he couldn't have done that. That would be stupid. Why would he? But, she'd felt the weight of his guilt before. It was possible... She was about to walk inside to check on him when he opened the door instead. Instant relief washed over her. Without thinking, she embraced him tightly. "Thank God..." She breathed. Realizing that she was touching him, she recoiled her arms, but only backed away a few inches. She noticed his hand immediately. She took it gently into her own whether he resisted or not. Removing Morna's shirt, she began performing what little healing she knew. It would mend the bones and stop the bleeding, but the bruises and the aching would remain. "You should be more careful. This could've been a lot worse," She murmured.
[member="Asher Kellan"]
 
Before I could even finish uttering the word of her name, Lexa came out of the blue to hug onto me. I didn't expect it and fell back a step trying to grip onto her without getting my blood on her. Despite this, I tried to speak, but she ignored me as she unwrapped my battered hand. I winced when she started to heal it. As much as there was pain in breaking it, a rapid heal can also hurt as well. My left hand was shaking from the pain and the adrenaline rushing through my body. I lowered my head when she told me that it could have been worse. Really it couldn't, but I acted like it could. Nodding my head, "Okay."

Speaking only one word to her, When she was done, I took my hands and grabbed her upper arm. I looked right at her. I was not going to avoid her contact. "Lexa, I am sorry for the mistakes I have made thus far. As much as you may say it is fine, I feel as though it is not. I have guilt in me, and I need to pay it back. Not to you, but to Morna as well." Closing the distance between us, I began to hug her, "I need to return the favors that Morna gave to me."

[member="Lexa Imura"]
 
Lexa hugged back. "I'm sorry, too. For being angry or anything else I did to you. It's just... hard to control what's happening to me right now. I was selfish. Only thinking about me instead of how you felt. I promise I'll help you with anything you need to do from now on." She didn't know how she could help, but she was going to try. For Asher, and for Morna.
[member="Asher Kellan"]
 

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