Jude and Xaan's Orbalisk Armor

[Darth Hashira]

(This is really more of a formality, I didn't know if I had to sub this to factory or just start rping. I figured, better safe than sorry)

Image Source: http://i792.photobucket.com/albums/yy201/Azrael_001/Star%20Wars/EmrysOrbaliskArmor.jpg

Intent: Get some sweet armor for Jude and Xaan
Development Thread: http://starwarsrp.net/topic/79985-orbalisksorbalisks-everywhere/
Manufacturer: Jude/Xaan and Orbalisks
Model: N/A
Affiliation: Jude and Xaan respectively
Modularity: There's the ability to zap the buggers off, but other than that..no.
Production:: UNIQUE (2)
Material: Orbalisks
Classification: Multi-purpose
Weight: Canon is silent on the issue of an orbalisk's weight, so about 12 kilograms.
Quality: 10
Special Features: Grants an extreme adrenaline boost to the user along with a boost connection to the dark side. Grants immunity to lightsabers and blasters. Extreme regeneration in areas covered and un-covered by the orablisks. Orbalisks have the ability to inject a lethal poison into the host's body killing them in either a few minutes or a few days depending on the amount of poison and the strength of the host. Orbalisks form a strong bond, and will stick with the host until death. Jude and Xaan have a limited amount of orbalisks on their body, therefore they will stay in their current spot and not spread.
Description: Orbalisks feed off the darkside from a person in exchange for their crazy abilities. They can be shot off by force lighting, but it has to be a high voltage. The orbalisks on are Jude and Xaan's body in such a way that they can only expose above the neck, below the ankle, and below the middle of the forearm without showing an orbalisk.
Other notes: This is two sets of armor, one for me and the other for my NPC master. Didn't make two subs since it would literally be a copy/paste with a few name changes.

 

[Ellie Mors]

[member="Jude Khann"]
Hello, I will be reviewing this.

I've read your development and it is totally up-to-par, but right now there's a field or two missing from your submission template that is provided by the armor template. I will place a spoilered copy of the template below and request that you check for missing fields and add them in, as it is a requirement to include each field in the template.

To answer the implied question you've posted above the submission, it is not a requirement to submit anything to the factory unless you are requested to by an RPJ/Admin after a report.

Spoiler: Armor template

Image Source: (Please link to where you found the image, or to the original artist if possible. TinEye or Google Image Search can help.)
Intent: (Example: 'A personal weapon for Darth Scabious' or 'an advanced armored personnel carrier for the Republic')
Development Thread: (The main way people work for their toys, though most submissions don't require a development thread. Restricted items require specific development threads. Substantial development threads can help judges approve more powerful submissions. If in doubt, put 'If necessary,' and a judge may or may not ask you for one. Threads cited here must be at least 10 quality posts.)
Manufacturer: (Kuat Drive Yards, BlasTech Industries, [Character Name], etc.)
Model: (Example: E-11 Blaster Rifle. For submissions where a model wouldn't be appropriate, such as a custom walking stick, put 'N/A' for 'Not Applicable'.)
Affiliation: (Example: The E-11 Blaster Rifle was produced for the Galactic Empire and used almost exclusively by Imperial Stormtroopers. Do not put the company unless the product is only for your company's use. Common choices include 'Open market' or the name of a specific faction.)
Modularity: (Can components of this submission be swapped out for other components? Is it especially easy to modify? For most submissions, put 'No'.)
Production: Production: (The scale is Unique (Only One Character), Semi-Unique (Only A Handful of Characters), Limited (Only A Select Group Of NPCs/PCs), Minor (Any Character, Only Select Groups Of NPCs), Mass-Produced. (Anyone.))
Material: (What is it made out of? Certain materials are more resistant, or vulnerable, to certain weapons. Example: 'Durasteel, blaster components.')
Classification: (Anti-Blaster, Anti-Ballistic, Multipurpose, Other)
Weight: (Via Metric System. Appropriate weight varies by quality, material, and character species. For example, standard Mandalorian armor is around 10 kg. Armor made of true Mandalorian iron, or a full set of combat gear for a soldier in the field, can be around 25kg. For special items, try to find the weight of a real-world equivalent.)
Quality: (Armor class is a measure of general stopping power. Most light armors would be classified as 1-4, most medium armors would be classified as 5-7, and most heavy armors would be classified as 8-10. However, rare or primitive materials, among other factors, can also affect armor class. For example, stormtrooper armor would be class 5, Mandalore's armor or beskar'kandar would be class 10, and a specially forged suit of personal armor for a high-ranking Force user could be anywhere from class 6-9 or thereabouts, depending on how much effort went into it. Many people choose lower armor classes for their custom armor in a trade off for more powerful equipment or specialized resistances, or simply for more mobility.)
Special Features: (Is it resistant to certain weapons? Does it include special sensors? Even if you've discussed your features at length in the Description line of the Base Template, this is a good place to list them.)
Description: (Include some strengths and weaknesses here. Describe some of the history behind the submission. Give us some idea of how it might perform its function, what it excels against and what some limitations of it are. This is where you talk about your idea, flesh it out over at least a good-sized paragraph, and address some of the ways it might be used or abused. For especially powerful or ambitious submissions, a very thorough description is recommended.)
Primary Source: (Please link the source of another writer's submission that you are modifying for your use; only necessary for "Chaos Canon" submissions)

 

[Darth Hashira]

[member="Braith Achlys"]

This good?

 

[Ellie Mors]

boost to force powers

In canon, Darth Bane forced the orbalisks to pump adrenaline into his body, the side effect of which caused his connection with the dark side to increase, but it did not (and the orbalisks themselves do not) increase force abilities outright.

Description: Orbalisks feed off the darkside from a person in exchange for their crazy abilities. They can be shot off by force lighting, but it has to be a high voltage. The orbalisks on are Jude and Xaan's body in such a way that they can only expose above the neck, below the ankle, and below the middle of the forearm without showing an orbalisk.

I need this to cover the special features, by describing them at length, as well as cover weaknesses and drawbacks of using orbalisks. For example, one orbalisk dying results in the release of a toxin that kills its host within days by breaking their body down on the subatomic level. This can be caused by orbalisks being struck by force lightning.

Quality: 10

If you lower this to quality 8 you can continue without further development, however quality 10 will prompt a request for further development specifically on the quality of the armor.

Production:: UNIQUE

Please denote, after Unique, that there are only two of these (Such as: Production: Unique (2)).

Classification: Anti-everything

Multi-purpose would fit here

Weight: Canon is silent on the issue of an orbalisk's weight, so about 7-15 kilograms.

Lets go with something in the middle of these two, and settle on 12 KG or so.

 

[Darth Hashira]

Two questions.

If you lower this to quality 8 you can continue without further development, however quality 10 will prompt a request for further development specifically on the quality of the armor.

What is this further development? Orbalisks are hands down one of the most powerful materials for armor creation in canon.

I need this to cover the special features, by describing them at length

Do I have to do this since then Wookiepedia page explains all this? Remind you I'm not making the orbalisks, merely the armor and this is submission is not necessary.

 

[Ellie Mors]

Do I have to do this since then Wookiepedia page explains all this? Remind you I'm not making the orbalisks, merely the armor and this is submission is not necessary.

Yes. The armor is made of orbalisks, and you are required to describe the armor in detail.

What is this further development? Orbalisks are hands down one of the most powerful materials for armor creation in canon.

Another 10 posts of development, though they needn't follow the Orbalisk challenge.

If you feel this is unfair you may request a second chance, or if you would prefer to not continue with this submission you may request it be archived.

 

[Darth Hashira]

Another 10 posts of development, though they needn't follow the Orbalisk challenge.

I find this extremely fair to bump the quality up to 10 for just ten posts, I will do so.

Yes. The armor is made of orbalisks, and you are required to describe the armor in detail.

I'll also do this as well.

 

[Darth Hashira]

I need this to cover the special features, by describing them at length, as well as cover weaknesses and drawbacks of using orbalisks. For example, one orbalisk dying results in the release of a toxin that kills its host within days by breaking their body down on the subatomic level. This can be caused by orbalisks being struck by force lightning.

Done.

Thread on the strength of the orbalisks coming soon, may not be tonight however

 

[Ellie Mors]

[member="Jude Khann"]
Alrighty, I will archive this until that is completed. Simply PM myself or another RPJ/Admin to have it pulled back out when you are ready.