Private Home Was Never a Place

[Taiia Locke]

//: Allyson Locke //:​

The morning arrived gently over Zakuul.

Warm sunlight spilled across terraces of white stone and polished metal, catching gardens that climbed between ancient buildings and casting long shadows through plazas that had stood for a thousand years. The city had awakened long before dawn. Cafes had already opened their doors to the day's first patrons, merchants arranged displays beneath flowering trees, and somewhere in the distance, a musician played a melody that drifted lazily through the morning air.

Taiia stood quietly on the balcony outside their suite, one hand resting lightly against the smooth stone railing as she looked out across the city below. It was beautiful in a way only old places could be. Thousands of years had left their mark on the city without diminishing it. Time had given Zakuul a quiet grace that could never have existed in the days of emperors and conquest. The monuments still stood, but they no longer celebrated power. They had become part of the landscape, watched over by gardens, cafes, and generations of people who had built ordinary lives among them. Taiia smiled softly as she looked across the skyline. There was something deeply reassuring about that.

A gentle breeze stirred her hair, carrying with it the scent of flowering vines and fresh bread from the streets below. She closed her eyes for a moment, simply breathing it in. There was nowhere she needed to be this morning. No students were waiting outside her office. No council is seeking her advice. No crisis demanding her attention before the day had properly begun. For perhaps the first time in longer than she cared to admit, the day belonged entirely to her.

No...

It belonged to them.

The thought lingered warmly as she turned back toward the suite. The room behind her already felt lived in. Allyson had somehow managed to leave small traces of herself everywhere, despite only being there a short while. A jacket rested carelessly over the back of a chair where it had almost certainly been dropped with every intention of hanging it properly later. Two cups remained on the small table beside the window, abandoned sometime during yesterday's conversation when neither of them had cared enough to interrupt it. The bed had been left comfortably unmade.

It made Taiia smile. For so many years, she had imagined mornings like this. Not grand adventures or dramatic reunions, simply waking beside Allyson without wondering how much time they had before duty called one of them away again. She had always imagined those mornings would feel extraordinary. Instead, they felt wonderfully ordinary. That realization settled over her with surprising ease. There was nothing planned for today. Perhaps they would spend the morning exploring the old districts. Perhaps they would lose themselves among the markets, arguing over which stall sold the best fruit or stopping because one café happened to smell better than the next. It did not really matter. For the first time in a very long time, the destination felt far less important than the company. Taiia heard movement somewhere behind her and smiled before she even turned around.

"Good morning, Min Laurel."

After everything they had endured, after all the years they had spent searching for one another, there was something profoundly comforting in how simple those words had become.

​

 

[Allyson Locke]

//: Taiia Locke //:

Waking up and not worrying about how she would escape the unfamiliar ceiling was foreign to the Corellian. But it was a welcome change in her life. Too many mornings had been filled with uncertainty after a night plagued with nightmares. She couldn't remember the last time she had slept through the night peacefully. Yet since coming home, her mind has been at ease.

Even when she couldn't sleep, just lying beside Taiia brought a peace that she had never felt before. Watching the woman sleep soundly despite everything that had happened made Allyson's heart settle. She stopped feeling the urge to run, to disappear from this life. For once, she found herself hopeful that she could have everything that she had been told to let go.

No one waits for you.

But she had someone who waited so long for her.

A hand reached out and felt the empty space beside her. Allyson's eyes opened, seeing that Taiia had woken up before her and had left their shared bed. Sitting up, she looked around the room, mostly searching for what she had been wearing the day before. She shuffled around the room only to pause to yawn, wondering what had dragged Taiia from bed so early.

The thought made her laugh quietly; her first thought was her wife, with a wonder that was not a decision between life and death. It was domestic, to be curious about the simple act of getting out of bed.

Pulling on her shorts and old t-shirt, she wandered towards where she could quietly feel the Eldorai. Allyson stopped and watched the woman, who seemed to be in her own world.

There was something about her that always brought Allyson to her knees whenever she remembered how freely she was loved. The thought caught in her throat, stealing her breath as she stood there, content to simply watch. She let her eyes wander over Taiia, quietly committing every familiar detail to memory as though she were seeing her for the first time all over again.

For so long, she had forced herself to love from a distance, watching pieces of Taiia's life unfold without ever truly being part of them. But this wasn't another stolen moment.

This was their life.

Drawn to her without a second thought, Allyson crossed the room and slipped in behind her wife. One arm settled around Taiia's waist, pulling her gently back until their bodies rested together. Her other hand rose to the cascade of vibrant copper hair, carefully sweeping it over one shoulder.

"Good morning, Min Laurel."

A soft smile tugged at Allyson's lips as she heard her own language spoken with Taiia's gentle cadence. She turned her face into the warmth of her wife's neck, breathing her in before pressing a lingering kiss to the nape. Another followed just beside it, feather-light, then one more beneath the curve of her ear as she held Taiia a little closer, unwilling to leave even the smallest space between them.

"What was so interesting," Allyson murmured with a quiet laugh against her skin, "that it managed to steal you away from our bed?"

The playful question lingered between them, carrying the unmistakable promise that she fully intended to coax her wife back there before long.

 

[Taiia Locke]

//: Allyson Locke //:​

Taiia smiled as Allyson's arms settled comfortably around her waist, and she instinctively leaned back into the embrace. A quiet breath escaped her beneath the light kisses that found her neck, her fingers slipping naturally between Allyson's as they intertwined. She closed her eyes for a moment, allowing herself to enjoy the warmth behind her before another smile found its way onto her lips.

"I woke up before you," she admitted softly, the faintest trace of amusement finding its way into her voice. "I hadn't meant to." Her eyes wandered back across the city beyond the balcony, though they no longer lingered there quite so intently. "I thought about waking you, and very nearly did." Her thumb traced a slow circle across the back of Allyson's hand before she rested a little more comfortably against her. "But you looked so peaceful. I decided it would have been terribly selfish. So I stayed for a while instead." She tilted her head ever so slightly. "I watched you sleep. You looked... content." The word lingered gently between them. "I wouldn't dream of denying you that."

Her attention drifted back toward the city. The streets below had grown busier while she had been standing there, shopkeepers greeting familiar faces as they arranged the morning's displays, children wandering far enough ahead to earn patient calls from their parents, and somewhere beyond the terraces, the same musician continued to play, the melody carried effortlessly on the breeze. "I seem to have lost track of time." The admission drew another quiet laugh from her. "I had been trying to decide what we ought to do today. There are gardens I'd quite like to see, markets everyone insists we ought to visit, and I believe there is an old café not terribly far from here that has survived since before the Eternal Empire." She smiled to herself. "I even considered making an itinerary." The smile broadened ever so slightly. "It lasted nearly a minute." Her head shook gently, amused by her own predictability.

"Then I realized..." She glanced back toward Allyson. "...I didn't particularly mind. I think I'd be perfectly happy if we spent the entire day wandering until something caught our attention." Her fingers gave Allyson's hand the gentlest squeeze. "Or until one of us became hungry." The corner of her mouth lifted. "I have a suspicion that will be you."

She settled comfortably back against Allyson once more, the morning breeze stirring loose strands of copper hair as another easy silence settled between them. "It's so wonderfully ordinary." She turned her head just enough that her smile was visible over her shoulder. "What of you, my love. Anything you want to do?"

​

 

[Allyson Locke]

//: Taiia Locke //:

Allyson quietly listened to her wife describe her morning. It was like her, trying to fit everything into a carefully laid-out plan. If she hadn't had those thoughts, the Corellian would have had to question if Taiia was ill or not. She smiled softly against the woman's skin, taking in the faint scent of her lingering perfume. These quiet mornings were something she never thought her life would have again.

Their laced fingers rested against Taiia's waist, Allyson letting the tips of her fingers gently caress along her midsection. There were quiet thoughts, lingering wishes that Allyson had conveyed before, but now wasn't the time.

It was ordinary, in a very relaxing and wonderful way. To think something as quiet as their morning conversation is something to praise.

She knew, though, that despite the ordinariness of their mornings and evenings — she'd soon have to return to the reality of her choices. The thought made Allyson hug her wife tighter, wanting to remember how she felt and the warmth she brought to the assassin's heart.

"You know me well," Allyson smiled, agreeing with her wife on which one of them would get hungry first. She wondered if Taiia had heard her stomach growl as she approached.

Allyson didn't respond to the question right away. She wanted to be in this moment just for a while longer. Let the rest of the galaxy churn and grind before she had to step into the mess of it all.

She wished she could walk away from it, but her choices had bound her to places, to people, ones that Taiia hadn't fully learned about just yet. Allyson mulled over the thought of having to tell Taiia she needed to return to work soon, disappearing as she often did. Too many times her missions meant no contact; Allyson had already lost Taiia once; she didn't want to do so again.

Closing her eyes, the Corellian decided to push those thoughts aside and focus on the present. She was here, with her wife, on a planet they should have come to so long ago.

"I think we should…" She kissed once more just below Taiia's ear. "... get married again, renew our vows, formally and ceremoniously be each other's again."

She once more hugged the woman, and let her gaze drift towards the bustling town center. If this could be their ordinary every day, she would find a way to make it so.

"But first we should find one of those cafes to eat at," her lips curled into a mischievous grin.

One that Taiia could hear as she finished.

"You're going to need the energy, trust me."

 

[Taiia Locke]

//: Allyson Locke //:

Taiia smiled as Allyson leaned into her. She could feel the gentle breath of her wife against her skin. It would have been impossible for Allyson to hold her any closer. Her smile widened as their interlocked hands came to rest gently against her midsection, a curious position after everything they'd spoken about in the Commonwealth. Her other hand moved to rest upon Allyson's. She felt the embrace tighten for a moment and was simply content to remain within her wife's arms.

When Allyson commented on her knowing her well, a gentle laugh escaped her. "I should hope so." She leaned back into Allyson once more, her green eyes drifting toward the streets below, now bustling with people. Once, she would have hurried downstairs, eager to explore every corner of the city. Somehow this was everything she wanted.

Allyson grew quiet behind her, the little absentminded movements of her hands coming to rest. The next words that she said both surprised her, and yet at the same time it didn't.

"I think we should... get married again, renew our vows, formally and ceremoniously be each other's again."

She let the words settle, taking the meaning to heart. She turned slightly so that she was face to face with her wife, green eyes looking into Allyson's, a warm, gentle smile forming on her lips. "My love, we never stopped belonging to one other, but the idea sounds wonderful all the same." She stole a brief kiss from the Corellian, smiling against her lips before finally relenting and giving her room to speak again.

"But first we should find one of those cafes to eat at,"

At her grin, Taiia tilted her head slightly, reaching up gently to caress Allyson's cheek. "Oh, I'll need the energy will I? Do you think I was sitting comfortably on Odessen this entire time?" she winked at her before stealing another kiss from her. "Come on, let's get dressed before you drag us both back to bed."

 

[Allyson Locke]

//: Taiia Locke //:

Taiia wasn't wrong.

They had never really divorced in the traditional sense, but being apart for so long, it had felt like it. Allyson let the woman's words sit for a moment as she thought about them. As much as she said it didn't bother her that she had, in essence, moved on, it did. But that was the plan, for Taiia to move on and forget her, to forget everything they had…

It of course didn't work, and Allyson was able to come home. A flaw in her carefully laid plan she was greatly thankful for.

But to know that she had said vows to another, and they were the last vows she had spoken… Allyson wanted to correct that; she was selfish in that manner. She also wanted to correct things; she felt as if she had assumed the relationship was done, and her affairs complicated the matter in her heart.

As much as Allyson hid her feelings on the matter, she figured Taiia had already known and was giving her the grace of pretending like it was a secret.

The kiss was welcomed; it warmed the Corellian's heart and quieted her mind. Both things that were needed in this moment. Her guilt was unbearable at times, but knowing that Taiia was there and accepted her even with her flaws made her cross easier to bear.

"Mm, I just want to do things right," she smiled as she added. Allyson, for a brief moment, wished her parents were alive, that there was someone to see this moment. She could possibly call John or Emilia, but both were so busy, and the latter would probably smack her for being as distant as she often was. Allyson knew she needed to patch things up with family… especially now.

Especially with the plans her and Taiia had talked about.

A smug little smirk tugged at the Corellian's lips as she caught her wife by the wrist. Taiia had already stolen a few kisses and was attempting to make a quick escape before Allyson could retaliate.

"And where do you think you're going?"

Allyson laughed as she tugged Taiia back into her arms, peppering her face with relentless kisses. In one effortless motion, she lifted her wife, hands settling securely beneath her thighs until Taiia's legs wrapped instinctively around her waist.

"I think I might have to adjust our schedule a bit before we leave."

And like many times before, the Corellian took her precious wife to their room.

 

[Taiia Locke]

//: Allyson Locke //:

Taiia had barely managed a step before Allyson's fingers closed around her wrist. She glanced back over her shoulder, the innocence in her expression lasting only until she caught the smirk already settling across her wife's lips.

"I was going to—"

The rest disappeared beneath a startled laugh as Allyson pulled her back into waiting arms. Taiia barely had time to steady herself before kisses found her cheek, her temple, the corner of her mouth, each one arriving too quickly for any protest she might have offered. She tried to turn her face away, though the smile spreading across it made the effort less than convincing. "Allyson…" Another kiss silenced her.

Then the ground vanished beneath her feet. Taiia gave a quiet sound of surprise as Allyson lifted her, her arms slipping instinctively around the Corellian's shoulders while her legs settled around her waist. Any lingering pretence of escape disappeared with it. She looked down at her wife, crimson hair falling forward around them as affection softened every trace of exasperation from her face. "You know, most people discuss changes to the schedule before making them." Her fingers slipped gently into the hair at the back of Allyson's neck, keeping her close as she leaned down to steal back one of the kisses she had been denied moments before. When she drew away, she remained near enough that their noses still brushed. "But I suppose I can make an exception." The words carried the faintest hint of amusement, though the warmth beneath them was unmistakable.

Taiia rested her forehead against Allyson's as she carried her through the halls, no longer paying the slightest attention to where they were going. For once there was no need to think about Zakuul, their departure, or any of the things still waiting beyond the walls around them. There would be time for all of it soon enough. For now she let herself remain wrapped around her wife, one hand resting against Allyson's cheek as her thumb moved slowly across familiar skin. "You are impossible, min larel." The quiet smile upon her lips betrayed just how little she minded.

 

[Allyson Locke]

//: Taiia Locke //:

Moments like this felt common now. It was as if she had never left, as if time hadn't slipped by them. Everything felt right in the galaxy despite the sinking feeling that lingered in the back of the Corellian's mind. Here on Zakuul, she could pretend. It could be like nothing had ever happened before this and that the galaxy wouldn't reach out and pull her away from this.

She felt it, like every other time. The cosmos were churning with the drums of war. Allyson Locke had a role to play, one that often removed her from this place, her place beside Taiia.

Falling back into the bed, her frame hovered over her wife, hands placed beside her head. Allyson looked down, admiring how perfectly her vibrant red hair fanned around her head like a halo. She was perfection, everything that anyone could dream of in a lover. What god in the cosmos pitied the Corellian so much, they allowed her to have something so precious even after she had almost thrown it all away…

She was allowed to come home.

"No," she teased, "I'm incorrigible."

A faint, knowing smile danced upon Allyson's mouth as she hovered above Taiia, pinning her gently beneath her weight. She descended slowly, finally bridging the narrow divide that lingered between them.

"And I did discuss the changes to the schedule; you were given a fair warning." Allyson lingered, her lips a breath away from her wife's.

"I've done everything by the book, Mrs. Locke." Allyson knew what she was doing; she was testing the waters. A part of her wondered if Taiia had planned on changing her name again, if she would be okay with returning to that part of their life.

Allyson thought about her being the one to change her name, but that opened up too many fears for the Corellian. Too many what-ifs that ended up in places she didn't want to think about. But those thoughts arose when she imagined Taiia changing her name back…

Yet they seemed less dangerous — the Locke name had developed into something else… something strong and wealthy. Wherever Taiia went… she would be protected.

John would make sure of that.

Their playful morning was brief, as it faded into the afternoon. Allyson had finally relented enough to let Taiia free from the tangle of legs and sheets. It was a habit of theirs, even in the early years of their relationship; they were often late for events or, in Allyson's case, mission briefings.

Neither seemed to care… except that one time…

"Taiia?" Allyson started to ask as she buckled the Corellian striped pants she pulled on.

"Do you not like remembering our first time?" Allyson said it with a smirk, knowing full well what happened several hours later. The Corellian remembered it quite fondly, as she remembered how adorable and how red Taiia's face had gotten.

Allyson hadn't realized there could be a shade of red deeper than Taiia's hair until she watched it color across the Eldorai woman's face that day.

She knew exactly what she was doing, exactly which memory she was prodding at, and perhaps enjoyed the reaction a little more than she should have. There was something irresistible about watching Taiia betray herself so completely over it.

"I'm pretty sure I did a bang-up job; you seemed to have enjoyed yourself."

 

[Taiia Locke]

//: Allyson Locke //:
​

Taiia remained among the tangled sheets for a moment longer, watching Allyson dress with a quiet smile that had yet to leave her face. The afternoon light had begun to stretch across the room, catching against the abandoned clothing scattered between the bed and the door and offering rather convincing evidence of just how thoroughly their schedule had been adjusted.

The name Allyson had used earlier still lingered somewhere in the back of her mind. Mrs. Locke. It had been offered lightly, hidden beneath the easy confidence and teasing that came so naturally to her wife, but Taiia had known Allyson far too long to miss the uncertainty beneath it. She had allowed the moment to pass without comment then, unwilling to interrupt what followed with a conversation neither of them needed to have while halfway to the bed.

She was reaching for her clothes when Allyson finally asked the question. Taiia stopped. Her eyes closed for the briefest moment as warmth immediately crept across her cheeks, proving that the memory had lost very little of its power despite the years between then and now. When she looked back, Allyson's smirk only deepened it. "I remember it perfectly well." She pulled on a comfortable shirt she had set aside earlier, forgoing the robe for such a casual outing. Crimson spread toward the delicate points of her ears. "I also remember that you were every bit as pleased with yourself then as you are now."

Taiia slipped from the bed and crossed the short distance between them, her fingers catching the waistband Allyson had only just finished fastening and giving it a small, deliberate adjustment. The embarrassment remained, though it was joined now by a look of quiet amusement as she lifted her eyes to meet the Corellian's. "And while I may have enjoyed myself..." Her fingers lingered against Allyson's waist. "I would prefer it had not ended the way it did." The corner of her mouth lifted before she leaned forward, pressing a lingering kiss against Allyson's lips. When she drew back, she remained close, her hand settling comfortably against her wife's chest.

"As for earlier..." Her gaze softened. "Mrs. Locke." Taiia repeated the name slowly, allowing herself to feel the familiarity of it. It did not sound like something new hearing it again. It felt like returning to something that had always belonged to them. Her thumb moved gently across the fabric beneath her hand as a warmer smile found its way onto her lips. "I think I would like to hear it more often."

​

 

[Allyson Locke]

//: Taiia Locke //:

The tug on her pants drew Allyson's attention quickly. She saw the full flush of embarrassment from the memory. It was one of Allyson's most cherished thoughts. The feeling of everything that evening felt almost honest. As much as she could that night in the current state of what her life was. For the first time, she was scared for someone. Allyson had loved before; that part wasn't new — but to honestly fear for someone's life that her mind thought of nothing else?

That was new… it was out of character for the Corellian, but also because of that, she knew she needed to pay attention.

Taiia was close, and Allyson couldn't help herself. A hand rested on the small of her wife's back as she pulled closer. The need to have nothing between them had never left, even as Allyson had put light years in their path. She was never too far; she came home often, lingering just on the outskirts so Taiia couldn't reach her. All of it meant to save and protect something she valued more than anything.

A hand rested against Taiia's cheek as she smiled.

"Of course." Allyson's voice was unnecessarily low, but this was their moment, their secret to keep.

"I never wanted to share a last name with anyone… I never even thought about marriage." Allyson chuckled as she kissed her wife's forehead gently. Her hand moved from her jaw to the base of Taiia's neck as she hugged her tightly all of a sudden.

She felt her heart race, wanting suddenly more, but she restrained herself.

Her lips parted as she hesitated for a moment. Honesty was hard; she had learned to lie to protect herself, to control the situation. None of that was necessary; all of her survival skills weren't needed here — not with Taiia.

"You know," She smiled as she nuzzled Taiia's neck while she embraced her.

"When I went to meet you that day, after the fight. I had called my cousin, John." She paused, letting the memory sink in. She had never told Taiia this, but the more she thought about it, Allyson realized something. She had always been drawn to the woman, always found herself catching her breath at every glance or touch.

When Allyson stumbled into that arena and she laid her eyes on the Obsidian Knight, Taiia in that moment became irreplaceable. No one was going to ever hold a candle to the woman — even when they were separated. Everyone was compared to what she had, what she loved…

What she had always wanted.

"I asked about you, wanted to know more information — I never did that…" She mused over the conversation and how John had warned her not to do anything stupid. "I really wanted you to like me..." Allyson was prepared for the whole night to end in the typical fashion.

Instead, Allyson found herself daydreaming about the future Mrs. Locke.

The love of her life.

"I teased and toyed with the idea of marrying you again. I… I often don't think of the future like that, even jokingly." She was quiet after, letting her words trail for a bit. Allyson often wondered how many times she had thought about the future or when the thoughts actually started to happen.

Most of it was because she was hopeful and Taiia had been that catalyst.

"I asked John how Taiia Locke sounded; he laughed, I laughed." She pulled her hand back slightly from Taiia's face, letting her thumb brush gently against the woman's pale cheek.

"But I was serious; it scared me — but I've only ever wanted you to be my 'Mrs. Locke.'"

 

[Taiia Locke]

//: Allyson Locke //:
​

Taiia grew quiet as Allyson spoke. Her arms remained comfortably around her wife, one hand moving slowly along her back while Allyson nestled against her neck. At first there was only the warmth of the embrace and the familiar sound of her voice, but the mention of John drew Taiia's attention more fully. She hadn't known. Her fingers stilled gently against Allyson's back as she listened to the rest.

"You called John... about me?" Quiet surprise touched her expression as Taiia drew back enough to see her face. Her green eyes lingered on Allyson's for a moment, taking in an admission that somehow made those first uncertain days between them feel different. Allyson had always seemed so certain then, confident enough to flirt without shame, persistent enough to keep finding reasons to be near her, and entirely too pleased whenever she managed to coax Taiia beyond whatever carefully maintained boundary she had placed between them. Taiia had never realized how much of that confidence had hidden something else.

"You wanted me to like you." The words came softer this time. Her hand rose to cover Allyson's where it rested against her cheek, leaning gently into the touch as her thumb moved across the back of it. A faint smile touched her lips, though she remained quiet for another moment as the rest settled in.

Marriage had never been something Allyson wanted. Neither had sharing her name, or even allowing herself to look far enough ahead to imagine someone still standing beside her when tomorrow became years. And yet she had imagined Taiia there. "You were already making a place for me in a future you rarely allowed yourself to imagine." Taiia's gaze softened. "Before we'd even had the chance to find out what we were." Her fingers slipped gently around Allyson's wrist, holding the hand against her cheek as she turned her head enough to place a quiet kiss against her palm.

Then there was the name. Taiia Locke. Her eyes lowered for a moment. "Min larel..." A slow breath escaped her before she looked back up. "You never wanted to give anyone your name." She held Allyson's gaze. "But you wanted to give it to me." She stepped closer into Allyson's embrace, her free arm slipping around her waist as their foreheads came gently together. For several seconds Taiia simply remained there.

Then the smallest smile returned. "Taiia Locke." She spoke it quietly, letting the familiar name settle between them. Taiia's thumb brushed gently across her cheek. "I think I understand it differently now." Her lips found Allyson's in a slow, tender kiss, lingering there before she drew back only far enough to meet her eyes again. "And I think I'd like to keep it."

​

 

[Allyson Locke]

//: Taiia Locke //:

Allyson smiled softly as she listened to her wife's musings. The woman was methodical with each moment, taking the time to fully understand it and commit it to memory. It was something that had drawn her to Taiia. Even in the arena as they stood opposite each other as momentary enemies, she studied Allyson. It was the first thing she noticed… after the careful smile.

She was attentive, and Allyson wanted that attention. Allyson wanted to give Taiia everything and anything that would keep her talking, smiling, and focused on her. The constant ramblings of different facts about a planet or things she had discovered during her meditation and training — all of it Allyson wanted. Even if she couldn't remember a third of what the woman rambled on about. The excitement on her face made Allyson smile.

Too often, she imagined the woman's excitement and inquisitive nature in the faces of their children, and hearing what they discovered as they grew up in whatever environment the two of them could have given them. It was everything Allyson wanted, and she had seen it in just those few moments in meeting Taiia.

That was something she had never experienced. She had loved, or so she thought before Taiia — but no one had ever captured her attention such as this.

Taiia kissed her in a way that melted the Corellian. She forgot everything her mind was thinking or wanting. It was the kind of kiss that erased any urge for hunger or thirst for water. It was the sustenance that could keep Allyson alive for days, months, years.

Her hands slipped down the woman's frame, feeling the curve of her hips as Allyson's fingers pulled at the soft fabric of her shirt. Her mind worked over what would come next, but Taiia pulled away. On instinct, Allyson's lips chased — she wanted more; she never wanted it to stop.

She was addicted to the woman in all the right ways.

"It's always been yours to have and to keep," Allyson whispered between them as she pressed a gentle kiss on her wife's forehead.

To Allyson, as long as they were separated, no one could or would replace Taiia. She was the only one who would be the Corellian's partner in life. Allyson remained quiet for a moment, letting her mind muse over their life again. She hated the time wasted and felt foolish for not giving Taiia the time she deserved.

She closed her eyes, tightly trying to push the thoughts away, to focus on what they have now and not ruin their time now with regret.

Allyson wrapped her arms tightly around Taiia, bringing her in closer. A hand rested behind her head as she kept her as flush against her as possible. Her heart raced, pounding in an alternating rhythm. There were too many emotions for her to try and regulate between the happiness and the guilt and regret.

Too many things told her she shouldn't be happy, that this was something that was going to be ripped from her the moment she felt comfortable.

Her breath shook as she sighed.

"I don't know how to be happy," She admitted quietly.

"You don't know how many nights I've stayed awake, praying, hoping that I'd be able to hold you again, hear those words." Allyson shut her eyes again as she felt her hands grab desperately for the woman in her arms.

"You make me so happy… It scares me, Taiia."

 

[Taiia Locke]

//: Allyson Locke //:
​

Taiia felt the change in Allyson before the words ever came. Her arms tightened around her, fingers catching against her as though some unseen force might pull Taiia away if she loosened her hold even slightly. She could feel the uneven rhythm of her heart against her own, the tremor beneath the breath that escaped against her hair, and whatever smile had been resting on Taiia's lips slowly faded as she listened.

"I don't know how to be happy."

Taiia closed her eyes, her own arms tightening around Allyson in turn. One hand moved slowly along her back until her fingers settled into the dark hair at the base of her neck. For a few quiet moments, she simply held her, allowing Allyson to cling as tightly as she needed.

"You make me so happy… It scares me, Taiia."

A quiet breath escaped her. "I know, Min Larel..." Her fingers moved gently through Allyson's hair, feeling the desperation in the way her wife held onto her. Taiia tightened her arms around her in turn, giving her no reason to loosen that grip. "You don't have to know how." She turned her head, pressing a lingering kiss against Allyson's temple before resting her cheek against hers once more. "Part of living is learning how to do things we've never done before. And I will be with you every step."

Only then did Taiia draw back enough to see her face. One hand remained at the back of Allyson's neck while the other rose gently to her cheek, her thumb brushing slowly across her skin. "The future scares me. I don't know what waits for us when we leave here. I don't know how long the galaxy will leave us alone, or what it will ask of either of us next."

Her gaze softened as she looked at her. They had allowed themselves to speak of things that once seemed too distant to touch, of a home and family, of children and a life beyond simply surviving whatever came next. Taiia wanted all of it, perhaps more than she had allowed herself to realize until recently, and something was frightening about wanting a future badly enough that it could be taken from her.

"We've started talking about a life again. About our family and children." A faint smile touched her lips. "Things I want enough that not knowing what comes next frightens me." Her thumb continued its slow path across Allyson's cheek. "But it doesn't feel nearly as daunting with you beside me." Taiia leaned forward until their foreheads rested gently together, her eyes closing as she allowed herself to breathe with her wife for a moment. "I don't need to know exactly what comes next, Min Larel. I don't think either of us ever will."

Her arms slipped more securely around Allyson once more, drawing her close. "But whatever it is..." The smallest smile returned. "...I get to face it with you." For a few moments, Taiia said nothing more. Then Allyson's earlier confession returned to her, the thought of all those nights spent awake and hoping for something Taiia had wanted just as desperately.

She drew back only enough to look at her again.

"And for all those nights you spent hoping you would hear it again..."

Taiia leaned in, her lips finding Allyson's in a slow, tender kiss. She lingered there before pulling back only far enough for the words to pass quietly between them.

"I love you. And I always will."

Her thumb brushed gently across Allyson's cheek once more before she kissed her again.