Private He Did What?

[Iris Arani]

Iris clicked her tongue as she looked over her X-Wing. It was, surprisingly, covered in toilet paper of all things. She'd never seen something like that on her ship. It was.. Kinda funny. Would've been funnier if it wasn't her own ship, but hey, that's how it worked, right? One of the dock workers stepped up beside her, handing over a datapad with a replay of just who did it. A young Nautolan? She couldn't say she knew one herself, but apparently the boy had already been called to the council chambers.

"Never got what was fun about this, y'know? People gotta clean up after you. Seems too selfish to be fun."

"It can be a lot of fun, so long as they accept the fact they're going to have to clean up. I'm sure he'll be here soon to do just that."

Reminded her a lot of her younger years, painting the halls of the Temple. Random buildings. Slaver dens. She certainly wasn't in a position to judge. At least now she could appreciate the fact she did learn responsibility and owning up to her.. Well. Vandalisms. "He with the council, yeah?"

"Far as I know."

"I'll go stop by, then."

Zak Dymo

 

[BB-4001A]

The Jedi Temple
The Really Tall Pointy Bits
yeah, the one that looks like the Jedi are giving Coruscant the middle finger

[ The Cool Kids ]​

Zak wasn't disappointed he got caught.

Zak wasn't disappointed he'd been hauled up to the Jedi Council. He'd been hauled up in front of lots of Jedi Councils. Galactic Republic. Silver Jedi. Commoner Systems Alliance. Jedi Academy Network. Galactic Alliance...

...seriously, how was this character still thirteen? But I digress.

No, what was disappointing was the fact that the x-wing he'd rolled hadn't even belonged to Valery Noble ! Which meant he'd totally wasted the prank on some random Jedi. And you know what was bad about rolling the starfighter of just some random Jedi? Nobody was gonna talk about it.

What was the point of pulling a prank if no one was gonna talk about it?

On the plus side, it had been a waste of toilet paper. Zak had raided the janitor closets on three different levels to gather up his stash for that starfighter roll, so hopefully it would prompt the Jedi to stock some new TP. And maybe this time, the budget droids would spring for something better than that single-ply bantha chit they kept purchasing.

A Jedi has no attachments. A Jedi thinks not of cost. A Jedi should only see to their most basic... blah blah blah. That toilet paper is straight garbage. The Jedi Masters could blow hot air out their mouths, but the reality was that they weren't teaching anyone to be humble. They were just being cheap.

Clean it up, check.

Detention, check.

Meditate on the Force, check.

Didn't any of these boomers have anything new?

Iris Arani​

 

[Iris Arani]

"So.. You're the one who threw the toilet paper over my ship?"

Iris had watched. Listened. For as much of the conversation that she could, anyway. Curious on how he'd handle being disciplined, curious on the colors that existed around him. He just seemed.. Bored. Of all things, bored.

Huh.

Still, she smiled. A friendly smile, despite the fact she knew full well he was the one that messed with her ship.

"Why?"

Zak Dymo

 

[BB-4001A]

Great.

It wasn't enough that Zak had to put up with twenty questions from the vaulted masters of the Order -- including a couple who were literally phoning it in -- but now here comes some random broad with a lightsaber.

Shutta probably thought she was the next Mara karking Jade.

...which, why did people say that? What the Hutt was a Mara Jade? What, was it, like, some kind of Force crystal or something? Was that a thing? And why would girls want to be like that? But whenever there was a Chick Jedi acting tough, people would always say 'look, there goes another Mara Jade.'

Even without pupils or irises, it was clear from the way the boy's head moved up and down that he was sizing her up. Then, dryly, the boy answered her question with one of his own. "And... you are?"

No, he didn't particularly care. Random broads with lightsabers were maybe a step above Sith Lawd in so far as Zak was concerned.

Then the boy's black eyes squinted, as though something was familiar about this one.

"Wait," the boy uttered. "Weren't you on that trip to that coral planet?"

Which, it made sense. Broads with lightsabers tended to stick together. And there was no broad with a lightsaber who was more of a badass than Romi Jade .

Iris Arani​

 

[Iris Arani]

"Iris."

Why not introduce herself? The colors around him were.. Beyond amusing. Was this what it was like to be an actual kid? Everything was boring, everyone was annoying, the like. Almost like the show she used to watch in rehab. She half expected 'did I do that?' to be his go to when she mentioned her ship.

Grant it, that didn't happen.

"Kinda, yeah. You were there?"

Zak Dymo

 

[BB-4001A]

"You were there?"

No, I just like to ask people if they've been to coral planets.

He'd almost said it. Almost. He'd started to, mouth open and the reply loaded like a turbolaser. What held his tongue was the realization the notion of there being some connection between them, however slight.

Instead, crossing his arms, the boy shifted back to the task of sorting out just what the shutta wanted with him. "Yeah?" the boy uttered finally.

Anyway, back to her original question.

"I dunno. Thought it'd be fun," the boy lied glibly. It was simple as only the best lies ever were. Easy to remember. He'd just finished repeating it to the Council. His answer to her wouldn't be any different.

"I thought it was Master Noble's X-Wing," the boy went on to add.

"Seriously, I guess those really do all look the same," he lamented.

Iris Arani​

 

[Iris Arani]

Iris squinted, just for a moment. Then turned to start walking towards the hanger. "You don't have to lie to me, you know. I'm not going to report you to the council. Now c'mon. You gotta clean up your mess."

She wasn't even a couple steps before she chuckled.

"Valery designed the ships for herself and her Padawans. There's at least five of them in total. Consider yourself lucky you picked mine rather than the others."

Zak Dymo

 

[BB-4001A]

"You don't have to lie to me, you know."

"What?" the boy asked, arms gesturing as he fell into step alongside Crazy Lady. Or Iris. Crazy Iris? "I really did think it was Master Noble's X-Wing," he answered. Which was the honest part about all of this. Or, at least, the honest part of what he'd said, which was precisely why he'd deflected to that, playing off her remark in the way he did... well, pretty much everything adults said.

They'd only gone a few steps before she said he was lucky.

Bith, what?

"Lucky!?"

Outside voice, thy name is Zak.

The head-tails whipped through the air with the sharp turn of the boy's head, bouncing behind him as he shot a look up at Iris as he complained, "Lady, you have any idea how long I spent on that prank!?" All right, it was all of a day. Day and a half tops. Because this was Zak and thinking was really not a thing. Any more than that and his attention span would have jumped over to something else. But still, he'd spent a whole day on that prank!

In other words, he was just being melodramatic.

"Now I'm gonna hafta come up with something better, because this was supposed to be AWESOME and instead it turned out lame because it was just some rando Jedi's starfighter!"

No, he hadn't figured out it was Iris' starfighter yet.

Iris Arani​

 

[Iris Arani]

"You know that's not what I meant."

Iris raised a brow. He was good. Too good. Was that another kid thing? Maybe. She blinked when he stopped though. The rush of emotions around him were clear in the colors. He was pretty passionate about his pranks, huh? .. Random Jedi, too?

That brought a laugh.

"I know we only met once, but I figured I wasn't random." And again she turned, once more heading back to the hangar. "Master Noble spent a lot of time designing that ship for me. I expect you to clean it up properly."

Zak Dymo

 

[BB-4001A]

"Wait," the boy uttered, shooting another look up at Iris as they walked. Realization was a dimly lit bulb over his head as he blurted aloud, "It was your starfighter?"

If he thought it was lame before, now he was truly disappointed. Not just rando Jedi but broad with a lightsaber rando Jedi at that. Truly the lowest in the pecking order of rando Jedi.

"Master Noble spent a lot of time designing that ship for me. I expect you to clean it up properly."

"Seriously? It's toilet paper," Zak answered, downplaying the prank. Holding his hands up, he wiggled his fingers in the air as he added, "Someone could use it for... Force-Moving-Stuff training or whatever and it'd be fine."

The word he was looking for was telekinesis.

No, that was not a word in his vocabulary. That he knew how to use properly anyway.

But, seriously, was she looking for a wash and a wax? Was she trying to get her starfighter detailed for free? Was this some child labor exploitation? Because if Zak had learned anything, it was the Jedi loved them some child labor exploitation.

They were called chores and usually said to build character.

Iris Arani​

 

[Iris Arani]

Iris, to her credit, tried not to laugh. Which only came out as a snort. Not that he'd taken a little to figure out it was her ship. No, it was the sheer disappointment in the colors around him because it turned out to be her ship. She'd never actually seen someone be disappointed it was her. "Sorry, sorry. I'd point you to Valery's ship but after I painted her pink I don't think she'd appreciate any more pranks on my behalf."

Though, that was a good idea. Stopping short of her ship to glance over the rolls of paper coating her ship, she nodded.

"Alright. Yeah. Telekinesis. We can go with that. Pick up all the paper without using your hands. Should be fine, right?" She echoed his sentiment, turning to him with a faint grin before hopping up on a nearby crate to just.. Watch. Might as well watch and make sure he didn't have any other pranks in mind for her ship buried under the paper.

"Go on. Build some character."

Zak Dymo

 

[BB-4001A]

Hands on his hips, Zak looked out over the starfighter draped in single-ply glory and admired his handiwork.

He'd like to see someone else roll an x-wing like that.

"We can go with that. Pick up all the paper without using your hands."

The boy just blinked, turning his head to look up at the woman with a confused look on his face.

For her part, Iris seemed to motion the boy on. As though beckoning him to just do it."Go on. Build some character."

Was this schutta for real?

"Not ME!" the boy blurted out, arms raised over his head in exasperation. Pitching forward, the boy explained, "I dunno how to... tele-key-esis or whatever!"

With a huff, the boy let his arms drop as he stepped away, stooping down to start picking up the toilet paper.

Iris Arani​

 

[Iris Arani]

Iris raised a brow. Not at his disbelief this time around, but at the fact he didn't actually know how to use Telekinesis. He didn't? Wasn't that something Padawan's were taught early on? Actually, wait, she didn't actually know what Younglings learned and such. Huh. Alright, something to ask about later. Right now? She shook her head. "Well, if you don't know how, why not learn how? I can teach you."

Zak Dymo

 

[BB-4001A]

Stooped over, his hands winding up a mass of toilet paper, the look on the Nautolan's face was skeptical at best.

"I dunno," the boy began, quite unsure of how to feel about this. "Learning makes it sound so..."

The boy's head bobbed from side to side as he tried to find the right word for the negative feelings he had on the subject. "...educational," he uttered finally.

There was nothing worse than educational. Educational programs were always the most boring holo-vids. Educational field trips were always the most boring field trips. He couldn't think of any good connotations for learning, except learning lightsaber techniques.

But that wasn't learning, it was just fun!

Plus, lightsabers were Jedi AF. Tele-key-whatever? That sounded like some Consular poodoo. "Plus, there's no music," Zak remarked, thinking out loud at this point, as he explained,

"I have trouble using the Force without music."

Iris Arani​

 

[Iris Arani]

Oh, he was the type who didn't like school. Again, something she thought only existed in shows. Who didn't want to learn? So much of her life was just learning how to be and exist as.. Well, herself. She hummed a bit though, glancing over her shoulder. The head of a BD-unit leaned up to meet her gaze. "Music, huh? Domxite can get something going for ya, if you want. Just tell them what you want to listen to."

Alright, but.. How to make learning the Force fun.

She raised a hand, reaching out. At first, nothing. Then the paper around Zak lifted. And wrapped around his head, just briefly.

"You seem to really like pranks. Why?"

Zak Dymo

 

[BB-4001A]

"Music, huh? Domxite can get something going for ya, if you want. Just tell them what you want to listen to."

The Nautolan seemed skeptical as his eyes moved from Iris' face to the droid that she'd indicated. "Uh," the boy uttered, bending down for another handful of toilet paper and then straightening back up with a shrug as he said, "Okay."

If it played music, then Zak wasn't going to say no.

"Maybe something upbeat?" the boy offered, directing his attention to the droid. "But not, like, lame," he amended. The last thing anyone needed was pop music. "Maybe something like Sunflower?" he proposed, tossing that out there as something that might work.

As the strips of toilet paper came up to drape around his head, the boy dropped the armful that he'd been carrying so that his hands were free for demonstrating the art of Slap-Fu, as he did as he swatted at the toilet paper levitating around his head.

"You seem to really like pranks. Why?"

"I dunno," the boy offered with a shrug. "Everyone's so serious all the time. I just thought it'd be funny."

Not the truth, or at least not the whole truth, but not a lie.

Time to change the subject. "You seem to really like starfighters, so why the x-wing?" the boy remarked, mimicking her use of language as he turned the question back on her.

"A J-2 interceptor would be way faster!"

Iris Arani​

 

[Iris Arani]

As it was requested, Domxite already got it playing. They'd figured out quite a bit on how to handle the holonet as of late. Soon enough the melody was playing from the Xwing itself. Not too loud, though. Last thing Iris wanted was to bother the dock workers anymore than they already were with this whole prank. He deflected her question again, though. Kids really knew what to do, huh?

"Master Valery made it for me. You should listen to people when they speak you know, I'm fairly certain I've said that twice prior. Now, you going to answer my question fully? Why pranks? Why go after Valery?"

Zak Dymo

 

[BB-4001A]

This schutta wouldn't quit.

Usually, at this point, adults were so frustrated with him that they just walked off. That didn't seem to be working with this one.

At least there was music.

Pretending to ignore the second part of her question, the boy held up a hand. A piece of toilet paper responded as a featherpush pulsed out from the boy, propping it up in the air as if caught by a breeze. "Hey, so how do you pull things?" the boy asked, as a second and third pulse kept the toilet paper aloft, as the boy tried to control its direction and drift.

"I figure its gotta be like pushing them, but I can never seem to get that part," Zak mused aloud, continuing to try and change the subject. "Do you, like, push it toward you?"

Hey, she was the one who offered.

Iris Arani​

 

[Iris Arani]

She rolled her eyes. She'd never actually been ignored so consistently like this before. Frustrating? Was that what this feeling was? Mm. Didn't matter. No, no. He wanted to at least learn, so why not teach him? She'd taught people before, right? Kinda. Maybe.

"I reach through the colors to find the shade of the object, then tug on those like they're strings."

The honest answer, though she knew it would make absolutely no sense. Her connection to the Force was unlike any other.

"In a way, yeah. You can treat it like pushing something from the opposite side. But that's not what I want to teach you. How to hold something without holding it, move it around, guide it with thought. That's the lesson. So.. Sit. Close your eyes. How do you feel the Force? What's it like for you?"

Zak Dymo

 

[BB-4001A]

"Through the colors?"

The Nautolan just blinked. Large, black abyssal eyes staring blankly back at the woman.

Zak had heard a lot of strange explanations in his long and distinguished short career as a Jedi. Master Nefertari Sovint tended to be very vague in her explanations, up to the point of chucking her padawan at a Greater Krayt Dragon on Tatooine because experience was the best teacher or something. Ilias Nytrau was more of a straight talker, but he usually talked about healing stuff. Ain't nobody got time for that. Coren Starchaser had been another, but his teacher style usually just involved yelling "WAR!" while dragging Zak along to whatever invasion, lost cause, or hopelessly outnumbered crusade was the Sith du jour. And Zak had no idea what Matsu Ike was talking about. Like, ever.

But colors? Colors was new.

"So.. Sit. Close your eyes."

...did this chick have any idea who she was talking to?

"How do you feel the Force? What's it like for you?"

"Huh?" the boy uttered, his face adopting a confused expression as his mind processed that question. Or questions.

Then, somehow, it just clicked. "Wait, you experience the Force like... color?" the boy asked, as understanding just seemed to snap into place. "That's so cool!" the boy enthused. "Is it like one color? Or, like... like this whole RAINBOW of just... whoooosh!" the boy asked, making a wave-like motion with both arms to accentuate just how much woosh he was envisioning.

Now Iris had the boy talking. Which meant she'd be lucky if he stopped.

"To me the Force is music," Zak supplied, clearly enthused to talk about the topic. "But... but, like... like, its music and motion. Like a... a rave, where you have this beat that you want to move your body to, but the beat can also guide your body," the boy added, his body in motion as he popped-and-locked as he spoke.

"It's like the whole universe is a concert... or... or, like, an ORCHESTRA where everything's playing an instrument," the boy enthused with a bright smile on his face, as he flossed in front of Iris.

"...but, sometimes I think I'm the only one who hears it," the boy admitted, his head bopping from side to side as he gave an embarrassed laugh. "Is that weird?"

Iris Arani ​