Gospel

[Arage Bao]

[member="Liya"]

Gideon looked down to his hands.

He could still see the blood even though he had scrubbed it clean yesterday. Something, a little voice, told him that he wouldn't ever truly stop seeing it. Always there as a reminder of what had happened, of his failure to protect his family. It had taken strength of will to stop short from taking his own skin of just to avoid seeing it.

None of this was easy.

"Some days I have a hard time understanding myself, Liya." Gideon acknowledged after a brief moment of reflection on her words.

He didn't pry though. Didn't try to figure out what exactly she meant, because it was... who knew. "I will teach you what I know." In the hope that those teachings would slowly solidify her on this path. Instead of risking her to slide back.

"Can you feel the Force?"

 

[Rory Naasade]

Liya frowned.

It was, in fairness, one of the more common expressions she usually exhibited. A neutral expression was the best he'd gotten so far. Distant or troubled, frowning, being the far more likely. Chewing on her lower lip, teeth catching on the metal piercings, she stopped immediately, that feeling of strangeness almost overwhelming for a moment.

As though that wasn't what it was supposed to feel like.

Just like every time she saw the tattoos. They felt.... alien.

She still hadn't responded to his comment about her clothes being wet. All she had done was reorient herself slightly to better take advantage of the warmth, casually shaking out the folds of the tunic so it would dry better. The leggings were *almost* dry already after all- the fabric thin snug. She shivered, the evaporation doing her no favors, but she soundly ignored it to concentrate on what he was saying now, instead.

It was a moment and then she answered. Her voice lilted slightly in surprise.

"I can, yes."

Mostly because of how easy it had been. It was as though that realization had been simply waiting for her to pick it up. She didn't need to learn how to reach out and touch the Force. It was simply there. Waiting.

She didn't know what to *do* with it. But that was, oddly, okay.

Something came easily. Second nature. And that pleased her enough to actually earn a small, self conscious smile.

[member="Gideon Blackford"]

 

[Arage Bao]

[member="Liya"]

Eyes closed once more and Gideon breathed out.

"Imagine the Force as a river." The words began to flow as he reached out for the Force. "By itself it is a force of nature, resilient, headstrong and unwilling to bend. You can try to force it into the path you want, but it will struggle and across a great span of time it will erode what you tried to road it into."

This was why the Sith were intrinsically self-destructive.

The corrupting energies of them breaking the will of the Force ran havoc through their bodies. Corrupting them, breaking them in so many small ways that they had no concept of. In the end they were little but a shell through which the Darkside flowed, spirit and soul eroded and once more the river pushed ahead to its own ends.

"But if you embrace the river's current, if you accept its direction... you can make small adjustments instead." His presence brushed against hers and the last portion would run through her mind. Yet, he was distracted, as that Gideon could feel... was light.

Why light?

It made no sense... there was no corruption to be found.

 

[Rory Naasade]

Her eyes had closed, following him, but they opened again, blinking slightly when his voice sounded in her head.

She just stared at him for a moment, then frowned and closed her eyes again. If he could talk there, could he see things? Was it a two way road? She had so many questions, but for now she bit them down- it wasn't easy, or natural to do so.

The rest of it? Kind of did though. She understood what he meant, and though it felt for a moment as though she wanted to come at it from an angle several degrees off, it was easy to orient herself mentally to the place he was speaking from.

Too easy, too natural. She pulled back, the worry clear on her face and against his mind.

It wasn't that learning how would be easy..... she would have to work at that, none of that carried over. But the dance of fingers across the current of it?

That she knew.

"What if.... what if I don't realize that I'm doing it..... wrong. What if.... that's just..... what I am?"

She didn't know about what he was sensing. How that was in truth impossible. There were no habitual channels cut through her psyche, utilizing the Dark Side as a short cut as the Sith were wont to to.

[member="Gideon Blackford"]

 

[Arage Bao]

[member="Liya"]

There was only so much that Gideon could see from his limited exposure.

But what he saw... it worried him, why did it worry him? The ease that she took to the currents should have made him happy and content. It meant that this journey might not be as difficult as he thought it would be. What did that mean though? The corruption of the Darkside was not so easily extinguished as that.

It took more than simple remorse.

It took fighting, over and over and over again, a fight that would last an entire lifetime from the moment that first embrace of the dark was accepted into someone's essence.

Always there.

Whispering promises of power.

"One is not born bad, one is made that way." Through hardship and cruelty. Through neglect. Through an upbringing that didn't inspire the values that brought goodness to someone. Oh, yes, there was choice, but there were also mountains upon mountains of little influences that had nothing to do with the person slowly being dragged down into the pit. "Just as one is made, it can be unmade."

A nod then.

"I am teaching you now and that makes you my responsibility. I will do my best to help you maintain the right path."

That was all that Gideon could offer.

 

[Rory Naasade]

The rest of the day went by much the same. Some combination of real moments interspersed with sudden awkwardness or confusion. But slowly, the real moments over took the others and while it would be impossible to say the two were 'friends' by the end of the day, at the very least something of the tension was starting to melt away.

That night they both slept, the exhaustion built up over the last 48 hours coupled with some of the diffusion from the day making it possible instead of leaving them both as they had been the night before. An abberation confirmed, a mistake, and Liya at least was able to let it go as simply that. It allowed for sleep, for real rest.

Morning dawned overcast and threatening snow. The pair hurried to get done what could be managed before the storm hit- Gideon working on the X-Wing and Liya breaking camp and moving everything into the lee beneath the far S-Foil.

The snow did not come in idyllic beauty, gentle falling and serene. It came with a howl of ice and gale that sent the pair scurrying to retrieve the tools and last few items left before retreating to the tent. Even in the lee of the ship, the wind shook the tent, ice pattering against the fabric hard enough to sound almost like rain. Even just the few minutes they had been out left them both crusted with ice, and once again clothing needed to be hung up to dry and they hunkered down to wait it out.

"At this rate, the tent's going to end up a solid block of ice," Liya observed softly, looking up. Already the fabric was starting to stiffen as the ice coated it. "But maybe it'll help keep the heat in if it gets thick enough."

She was sitting on the folded up sleeping bag, a blanket around her shoulders. Knees drawn up and arms wrapped around them, she rested her chin, looking up thoughtfully as the light dimmed further and the wind redoubled its howling.

[member="Gideon Blackford"]

 

[Arage Bao]

[member="Liya"]

He watched with her as the snow slowly piled up around their tent and snowed them in.

Part of him worried that the weight might get too heavy even with all their prep work and then the roof would collapse on top of them. Eyeing it for a little while Gideon sighed in the end. Staring at it for hours at a time wasn't going to solve anything, so might as well do something else. He looked down and noticed her own look.

Not one of worry.

Instead Liya seemed to be interested in the way the snow fell. Part of him was amused about that. "We will be here for a while, do you want to pick up the lesson again?"

Hand rose and once more Gideon embraced the Force, letting the river course through him and shifting with it. A second later one of the nutrition bars detached itself from the bag, floating up before squarely landing in his stretched out hand. "Master Draya always said that it is better to train a set of skills across your time, instead of wholly focusing on one."

This time the ping of pain was wholly internal.

Easier and easier not to show it, but that was how it always went. "Close your eyes, embrace the Force, redirect the bar from my hand to yours."

 

[Rory Naasade]

The light and sounds from outside were starting to mute. Muffled and heavy, the storm raged on but there in the tent was a certain weighted calm.

Liya turned her attention to Gideon, brow furrowing and a small, thoughtful frown curving her lips. She closed her eyes, and tentatively reached out. The Force was there, waiting, only a step removed from normal conscious thought. It was both strange and familiar at the same time, and instead of acting right away, she simply let it flow over and around her.

She didn't know if it was because of the practice from yesterday, or for some other reason, but when she did go casting out farther, the idea of lifting something was much simpler and straight forward than of warming the air in the tent. If the Force was like a river, all she had to do was allow its natural buoyancy to rise up and-

The bar rose a centimeter, then two, off of his palm. But there it stalled and she opened her eyes, frown deepening- which caused the bar to float back down again.

But she didn't ask him anything. Just tried again. Again it rose, and again when she tried to figure out how to bring it to her, she lost her concentration and once more it landed softly in his palm.

The third time, however, she managed it. Eyes open as it neared her, she reached out, plucking it from the air with slender fingers and an almost childlike excitement in her eyes. She smiled, clearly pleased with herself, casting it in his direction, bright and clear for a moment. And then it faded around the edges and she refocused on the bar, letting it go and keeping it afloat.

[member="Gideon Blackford"]

 

[Arage Bao]

[member="Liya"]

Their eyes met and Gideon inclined his head slightly in acknowledgement.

He should have felt satisfaction at her success and part of him did feel it, but the larger part was... annoyance? No, that was a fraction of the whole, it was annoyance and fear and anger and fury and hate and confusion all mixed into a cocktail that the Jedi simply did not know what to do with. She was good, her essence told him that story, her actions after her memories were lost only underlining it, but that made no sense. He had seen her with his own two eyes.

There was no room for-

Gideon breathed out softly and forced to center himself out of those emotions. They led to the Darkside and he had already decided to help her on this path. Did it truly matter that every single part of this felt completely wrong and strange?

"You are good at this." Gideon said, while watching her progress in both the physical, but also the way she wove the strands of the Force around the bar. "A natural to the Lightside." There was a small smirk playing at the edge of his mouth now. "Took me three weeks, before I managed to levitate a small sphere." The memories were bitter-sweet and sometimes Gideon wondered if it wouldn't be better to just push them away completely and forget about them.

It would spare him of the pain.

"Try to unwrap it with only the Force." The instruction came a moment later.

 

[Rory Naasade]

She didn't miss it. It was only there for a moment, a flash, but it had been there behind his eyes. Oh, he'd hidden it again. And because he had, she studiously ignored it. It was like offering him privacy, only instead of privacy of his person, it was privacy of his thoughts and emotions. Besides, ignoring it was safer.

Part of her didn't really want to know what he actually thought of her, of this.

And part of her thought she deserved it.

She almost apologized, but managed to keep it back. She hadn't done anything wrong, after all. And the words would have ended up being meaningless because of that. Sorry? For what? For learning it more easily than him? That was ridiculous.

And yet....

Fortunately, what he asked of her next was significantly more difficult. She frowned and frowned, chewing on her lower lip and tongue stuck slightly out of the corner in concentration as she tried again and again- but all she managed to do what mangle the bar inside of the wrapper after a half an hour of trying.

[member="Gideon Blackford"]

 

[Arage Bao]

[member="Liya"]

No satisfaction at her failure.

Which surprised him, because two moments after his command Gideon had assumed he had wanted to see her fail. Instead there was nothing, except perhaps a small touch of disappointment. Why disappointment when half an hour ago he had been angry?

Gideon didn't know anymore.

More and more he was starting to realize he too didn't really understand himself. "That's what training is for, don't worry about it." That particular application of TK had taken him more than a month to get proficient at it, but he still wasn't a Master.

TK was complicated, he found.

"Eat, drink, we will need our energy for tomorrow." Gideon looked up, the sun completely bloated out by the snow covering the entirety of their tent.

Scary thought that, being buried alive.

 

[Rory Naasade]

That was how it went- that was what he said when he'd decided it was time it... was simply time. Liya didn't particularly mind stopping, didn't mind eating and resting. But sometimes it was like he was the keeper of a schedule she wasn't aware of. Like he held a clock and a calendar in his mind that dictated now it was time for X, now it was time for Y. It wasn't something worth arguing about simple for the sake of arguing, so she went along because, honestly?

​It was just easy to.

Besides, as far as she was concerned, she was still essentially in his custody. A murderer, being brought to the Alliance. She had agreed to that, brought to justice. It carried with it a thousand undertones neither of them had fully expected. Honestly it was almost more comfortable to simply nod and go with what he said in things like this as opposed to if he had asked her opinion on that matter. It fit with a narrative that she had accepted when she'd first opened her eyes.

It was still early, but the sky was dark and in truth between the mad scurry to get ahead of the storm and the work with the Force, Liya was tired. They ate in silence that wasn't awkward anymore, but neither was it particularly compatible. Pulling clothes back on, she braved the storm, actually having to lever open the frozen tent flap. She returned a minute later, hair and clothes coated in ice, face red and hands freezing. Necessary evils.

"You'd said tomorrow originally... when the repairs would be done," she said, stripping again because there would be no sleeping in wet and icy clothes. "Will the storm delay that do you think?"

[member="Gideon Blackford"]

 

[Arage Bao]

[member="Liya"]

It was obvious to him.

When he had been a padawan Master Draya had decided everything for him from the way he dressed to what they would be doing from the morning to the late evening and beyond. It had inspired conflict, yes, but it had also given him a sense of discipline that had been lacking before Gideon joined the Green Jedi and started to get serious about his path in the Galaxy.

In this sense he simply followed the trajectory of Draya and that meant sorting out a strict schedule that would ensure both of them got everything they needed from the day.

When she went out Gideon breathed out.

For a moment there was just peace and quiet and a sense of being alone. A feeling that the Jedi hadn't experienced in quite some time and that was strangely comfortable.

Eventually Liya would return and the question she asked was also on his mind. "I don't know." The Corellian Jedi would answer in reply. "I hope the parts will be okay? But we didn't have much to isolate them with, so it's a 50/50 chance, that I am gonna have to reroute some of the systems to circumvent the frosting."

"If that is the case, it might be another two days."

 

[Rory Naasade]

Settling back down, she nodded, accepting but clearly not particularly happy about it. Despite her agreement, the wait was.... hard. She wanted to close her eyes, breath in and simply.... get it over with. Not knowing what was going to happen, but knowing she was being brought to be tried.... as a Sith. As a murderer.

But she didn't complain. About any of it. Not the waiting, not the cold. She did not complain about the food or the situation. She simply nodded and accepted it. This wasn't her punishment- she couldn't see it that way in the slightest when he was going through all of it next to her.

She deserved worse than this and she knew it.

Without much to say or do, it simply made sense to lay down. To try to sleep. The storm raged outside of the tent, but within it was oddly muted. Through the snow and the ice, there was a heaviness in the air, drowsy and deep. Pulling the blanket over, she settled down. Whether he would or not, well, that was up to him.

But Liya closed her eyes, that small, familiar frown on her face. Even if sleep wouldn't come any time soon, at least she could rest.

[member="Gideon Blackford"]

 

[Arage Bao]

[member="Liya"]

The next morning came early for both of them.

Instead of laying about in bed Gideon rose up, the familiar and warm press removing itself entirely for the situation. He didn't attempt to wake her though, instead the gathering of clothes and pulling them one were done in quiet and peace. There was no attempt to wait on her, instead the Jedi approached the former entrance and exit to their tent.

It was frozen shut now, but that meant little when it came to the Jedi and their tricks. Hand already pressed firmly against it and Gideon's eyes closed.

The focus was there just beyond his skin against the icy tent.

Would have been easier with Liya. She was a natural, but for some reason Gideon didn't think it would be a good idea to enlist her assistant now. No, better to leave her sleep and figure things out himself. If that didn't work there would always be a plan b.

The ice was slowly starting to melt against his pressure.

 

[Rory Naasade]

She woke up before he finished, but she didn't move. Stayed still with eyes closed. The roil of conflicting emotions upon waking was more than she honestly wanted to face him with first thing, so she let him think she slept simply because it was easier.

It was a long time before she emerged from that tent. And when she did, it was in quiet. Slipping out and heading down to the river without a word.

****

It turned out that the storm had not done any serious damage. Liya busied herself breaking camp and packing everything into the X-Wing, while Gideon finished the last tasks that would get them out of here. There was relief in both of them, but also a new awkwardness. Mostly they spoke when they needed to- polite, careful, as if both were a little unsure how else to manage it.

It was early afternoon by the time they were ready to get going. As they settled into the cockpit, first Gideon and then Liya, she puzzled around how it could be both more and less awkward than it was the last time.

"We have to find somewhere to get more fuel now, right?" She asked quietly as they started their ascent. Already she was mulling over what they could sell or barter- but there was in truth very little.

[member="Gideon Blackford"]

 

[Arage Bao]

[member="Liya"]

Gideon ignored everything about her besides her voice.

It was easier that way.

"This jump got us close to D7-4X." It took a few tries, before he managed to get to the controls in front. She was... everywhere and it took a bit without causing too much friction. "Little asteroid refueling station. Thing used to be a mining outpost back in the day, but got abandoned by the Republic early on. Not enough yields. Instead of pirates or Arceneau some locals moved in, made it work."

The explanation helped to one degree or the other.

Kept his attention off of her and onto the job at hand. "The enclave was there to assist them when a minor plague was sweeping through their corridors..."

The implication was clear.

Gideon hoped that their help in the past would leverage some weight, so they would get something out of that place instead of leaving empty-handed. The Jedi wasn't a fool, they were in the Outer Rim, only the Enclave and other Jedi did hand-outs.

They'd have to pay one way or another.

But the opportunities would be opened, whereas first they were closed.

 

[Rory Naasade]

He answered a few more of her questions about the outpost, but then they fell silent. It wasn't a long jump to the asteroid refueling station, and they were both in better shape than they had been on their last leg. It meant that instead of sleeping the time had to be passed the old fashioned way. In each other's company.

There wasn't, however, really very much to talk about. She didn't know what to ask, and she had very little to offer in that regard. So it passed mostly in silence instead.

D7-4X was busier than Gideon remembered. Since the plague they had helped with, the population there had grown a bit, business ticking up with the galactic unrest. War time economies starting to kick in, people shifting from one area to the next to keep out of harm's way. It was chatter they picked up on easily after landing. First Order and Empire in their attacks against the Silver Jedi. The Silver Jedi taking up arms against the Sith Empire. Unrest near Commenor, the destruction of the Jedi Temple on Sullust.

Liya didn't understand all of it. Didn't know who all of the players were. But it was enough to know that the galaxy was on the verge of something big and frightening, and she kept a little closer to Gideon as they threaded their way through to his contact. She stayed quiet as the two greeted each other, only nodding slightly when introduced. Mostly, she listened. Trying to remember something of all of this.

[member="Gideon Blackford"]

 

[Arage Bao]

[member="Liya"]

The conversation wasn't as helpful as Gideon had expected it to be and left him only more frustrated.

Non-committal, the Duros hadn't even wanted to meet his eye, just kept wringing his hands and shrugging shoulders after the initial platitudes of 'May the Force stand with them'. Trying to sound interested, but failing to even properly recite the greatest of their ideals. Frustrating and had left Gideon dumbfounded.

Each and every single one of the Green Jedi had spend days here.

Working themselves to the bone to heal them. Dwas' child had been healed by Draya, presiding over her for three nights, until finally her fever broke and the danger was over.

But now all that the Duros had to offer were empty words about the economy. It was silent- as they walked away, turned the corner and then the Jedi simply leaned against the wall. Not really watching anything, just his jaw set and slowly trying to breathe in and out. "That didn't go as well as I hoped it would." Gideon sighed and tried to push away the feeling of betrayal. Draya would have chided him over it- they hadn't helped these people to get something in return.

A thankless job, yes, but they did it to make a difference that few others could in this war-torn Galaxy.

"We can try to sell the spare parts we got. Might get us some credits for fuel." Dangerous prospect. If they were left without spare parts on a remote planet, who knew what would happen?

 

[Rory Naasade]

Liya frowned.

But she did that a lot.

It seemed like the only option. Anything else they had they knew they needed simply to survive, and even if they did sell them, how far would it get them? Rations and tent wouldn't pay for the fuel to lift off of the rock, not by a long shot. So what else could they-

She pulled up short when someone tugged on her sleeve. Grey eyes canted to the side and down at the little Chadra Fan looking up at her critically.

"You need credits?" It squeaked, but there was something not cute at all in the way it squinted up at her.

She nodded hesitantly, opening her mouth to say something, but it cut her off.

"If that's a real Dathomiri blood stone, I'll buy it."

Liya blinked in confusion.

"A what?"

It looked at her like she had six heads and only three of them were supposed to be there.

"Blood stone. Ugh, bend down. No, farther. The one in your right ear. Take it out. Yes, that one. Dathomiri blood stone." It eyed her critically for a moment. "Didja steal it, girl? Cause if it was yours, you'd know what it was!"

She just shook her head helplessly, spreading her hands out in a gesture that said nothing and everything. The little creature squeaked, something between a chuff and a snort. Without hesitating, it reached out, claw nicking the inside of her wrist where she held the stone out in her open palm. She flinched, about to pull away, but he grabbed her hand and pushed the stone up into the trickle of blood. Currently mottled red and green, as it touched the drop it acted like a sponge despite the clear stone make up. She watched with confusion and interest as it absorbed the blood, a miniscule amount of new red marring the surface. The Chadra Fan rubbed at it with its thumb, then nodded once in approval.

"The witches on Dathomir use these sometimes. To settle feuds. I mean, the fight to the death before hand settles the feud, but the blood of the loser is considered payment for whatever wrong was committed, so the winner don't go after their family, see? See the different shades of red? Three, maybe four people died ta make this stone."

It squinted at her, as if trying to figure something out. Liya just looked horrified, kneeling painfully still next to the small creature's booth.

"Pay a lot for somethin' like that, a collector would," it mused, rubbing a finger over the stone in the palm of her hand.

"Then I'll sell it," she said, her voice a little faint but firm.

[member="Gideon Blackford"]