Star Wars Roleplay: Chaos

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Private Farcry

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Location: Azbrian, Master Nobles ship
Objective: Put his mother and father to rest
Tag: Valery Noble Valery Noble

The trip back to his home planet of Azbrian had been nothing but silent for Silas. For years had he been dreading this moment, not from going back to the planet itself but from going to a place he still deeply loved. Within the remains of the scorched farmhouse rested his parents, who were left to suffer a horrible death at the hands of the murderers. Their souls were still there, attached to what was left of their haven which was nothing but corrupted from the fires that changed its very atmosphere. No matter where they were now, Silas needed them. Darkness would come at him from every angle, not just in the physical world but the spiritual. With their presence by his side, Silas knew nothing could break him.

Accompanying him on the spiritual mission was Master Noble, a kind Jedi master who he first met on a mission in Ilum. At first, he was unsure to ask such a thing considering how busy she was. Although, to his surprise, she was more than willing to help put his mind to rest. Noble was a selfless warrior who deeply cared for others, a trait that shined from her duties as a Jedi. He'd never forget her goodwill...

"Master Noble... thank you for agreeing to come with me. This means more to me than you could possibly imagine" he finally said in a lowered tone behind her, his head looking down to the floor in sorrow. The sadness only seemed to grow as they zoomed over the grassy plains, reminding him of a time when he could be careless and be happy beyond his wildest dreams. Not that he was happy now, but things had drastically changed course in his young life. All he could do was bottle up the rising emotion for now, he didn't want to humiliate himself by crying in front of a master.

"I just need to put my mind to rest"
 
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Location: Azbrian
Valery: Appearance
Outfit: Factory Link
Lightsabers: Link!
"There's no need to thank me. All Jedi must confront their pasts at some point in their lives," Valery said before her gaze briefly shifted away from the front window, allowing her to look at the Padawan, "But it's not something you have to do entirely alone. It's my pleasure to help you a bit today." she offered him the usual kind smile those who knew her would recognize instantly, and turned back to bring the shuttle closer to their destination.
While it wasn't common for Valery to accompany others on journeys like this, she was very familiar with the concept of confronting the past. It was something she went through as a Padawan, a Knight, a Master, and again when she got out of stasis. Reflection was a necessary step of growth, but often a very difficult one, so she was quite happy to be guiding someone with it.
"I'll take us down as close to the destination as possible, and I will help you get through it. But if you need a moment alone there, don't be afraid to ask," Valery said this time without making eye contact. Sometimes it was easier to talk about emotionally heavy subjects without having to look someone straight in the eyes.
"I know what it's like to say goodbye to someone you cared about."
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ocation: Azbrian, Master Nobles ship
Objective: Put his mother and father to rest
Tag: Valery Noble Valery Noble

"You're right... If I wish to truly progress I need to confront it head on. Thankfully, that's what I'm doing now"

Even with his lowered tone Silas still sounded somewhat calm and in control of his emotions. For a person his age he was able to cope well under immense stress and pressure, and that was what he was going to do now. All he needed to do was take regular deep breaths... if he kept to the technique he was going to be fine "I appreciate it Master Noble..." the boy said with a smile of his own back to her.

Silas fumbled with his hands while Valery turned back to focus on their arrival at the destination, keeping himself busy before he faced the inevitable wave of emotion that was going to hit him like a truck. He didn't know what was left of the homestead nor if there was anything left of it. A part of him hoped there was at least one thing salvageable, yet the chances of that were quite low in itself since the atrocity happened years ago. No matter what, he had to mentally prepare for what he was about to see.

Nodding slowly, the padawan kept his eyes to the floor of the ship. Keeping his focus on something that wasn't moving seemed to be a good coping method for now. Even then, it was probably still his mentality that was holding the emotion at bay.

"How did you move on?" the boy said after a few moments of silence, his head raising slightly to hear what the Master had to say. It was clear that Valery had gone through this many times before in her lifetime, and getting a perspective from someone as wise as her was something worth hearing.

Over the horizon, a black outline of what looked like a huge bonfire came into their eyes view. In between the shiny green grass, hills was a circular area of scorched earth, ravaged by the raging fire that had once been present. In the middle, was a large pile of charred wood that once belonged to a beautiful house. It was almost as if the fires had permanently corrupted the very ground it touched, making it unrecognisable for anyone who was lucky enough to come across the ruins.

"There... there it is..."
 

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Location: Azbrian
Valery: Appearance
Outfit: Factory Link
Lightsabers: Link!
With her fiery eyes turned out into the planet's environment, Valery listened to Silas while she also focused on getting them to their destination safely. He felt grateful for her help but she didn't think much of it — having others with her in difficult times for support is exactly what she once needed to get through her own problems. To return the favor now for someone else felt like the least she could do. It was simply in her nature to be caring and helpful, especially towards younger Jedi.
But as the shuttle moved on, Silas eventually broke a moment of silence with a question that returned her eyes to him, albeit for a short moment. The corners of her lips curled up into a faint smile and she'd look back out through the window, "Some things hurt so much that there is no easy way to move on. You might learn a lesson from what happened, you can reflect on it but ultimately you need time to accept what happened, and to not focus on the things you can not change anymore." the woman said.
"Having others who care about you and help will make this easier, but it's still a burden nobody can carry for you entirely. So it takes time; sometimes a lot of time..." she said before briefly glancing over again. "And that's nothing to be ashamed of."
Finally, the two seemed to be approaching their destination, as a black outline appeared on the horizon that marked the burning remains of his old home. She could feel emotion and tension rising in the Force but for a young Padawan, he was maintaining a calm demeanor.
"Alright, I'm taking us down."
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Location: Azbrian, Master Nobles ship
Objective: Put his mother and father to rest
Tag: Valery Noble Valery Noble

The wisdom that Master Noble spoke made Silas realise how much he was wrong. There was no way of fully moving on from the past, no matter how hard he tried. Although, there were methods of dealing with it. All you needed to do was focus on the now rather than think about yesterday because in all truth it was impossible to go back in time. But compared to now, there was still a lot of time to craft a future he desperately craved. And if that was helping the Jedi create peace in the galaxy, that's what he was going to do.

"You're right again Master Noble, but when it comes to loved ones and friends I don't really have anyone left..." he said softly with a sniff of his nose.

Other than his parents, Silas didn't have anyone else close to him. His homeworld, Azbrian was not considered urban at all. There were pockets of civilization around the planet, but all in all, it wasn't as heavily populated compared to other planets. And the fact he was taught everything he needed to know at home had making friends another level of difficulty. Not that he lacked the confidence or social skills, but from the lack of exposure to bigger crowds. Other than Master Noble, he didn't have anyone else.

Carefully, the ship hovered above the shiny green glass and lowered itself to a halt outside of the black outline left of them. Silas stared at the ruins of his former home with a lifeless stare while the cockpit raised up, almost reminiscing of all the good memories he had here. Once he broke out of his daze he raised himself up and jumped down to the floor, taking deep and steady breaths to compose himself "Stay calm Silas..." He said to himself mentally, still unsure if his emotions would be too much for him to handle.

Silas released a loud sigh before taking one step after the other towards the scorched outline, each one feeling like it could force him to breakdown at any moment. He was a boy not known for crying or being overly emotional, but when something so close had been ripped away so tragically no one would be able to withstand such raw emotion.

His right foot crunched loudly when it stepped over the black grass, still crispy and unheeled from the raging fire that had left a permanent mark on its beautiful landscape. As soon as that happened something changed drastically inside of Silas, almost like a flood gate had opened inside of his very soul. Unexpectedly stopping on his path, tears began to form in his eyes and an overwhelming feeling of sorrow stabbed him in the heart like a sharp[ dagger. He looked over his shoulder slightly to Master Valery, a single tear rolling down the side of his cheek. Feeling embarrassed from showing weakness, he looked down to the floor and whimpered quietly in mourning. A starter to the wave of sadness that flowed through his body like a hurricane.

"I-I... I'm sorry...." he croaked
 

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Location: Azbrian
Valery: Appearance
Outfit: Factory Link
Lightsabers: Link!
"You're right again Master Noble, but when it comes to loved ones and friends I don't really have anyone left..." he said softly with a sniff of his nose.
Valery remained quiet for just a moment as she heard him speak, her focus fully on getting the ship down safely. But when the landing gear finally made contact with the ground, she turned her head and offered what she hoped to be a somewhat comforting smile, "But you do have it within you to make new friendships, new loved ones — don't ever give up on that," Valery said before she powered down the ship's engines and got up from her seat.
Slowly, the ramp lowered and she knew that the really difficult time started now. The few hours before something stressful were awful but when it came to confronting loss and painful events, actually seeing it with your own eyes was the worst part. Emotions were going to be high and even though he tried to always stay calm and strong, she believed that her comfort might actually be needed today.
She stepped out of the ship herself and stood quietly while she watched Silas. He moved up to the scorched earth but when his feet reached the line of destruction, he froze and she could feel the emotional shift echo through the Force. It sent a shiver down the woman's spine, and without any hesitation, she began to walk over while he was trying to hold on to his composure.
But with what lay ahead of him, no amount of mental fortitude could keep it all together.
"It's okay to cry," Valery reassured him as she wrapped an arm around his shoulders and pulled him close against her. The embrace was going to last as long as he wanted or needed it to — she didn't mind it at all, and cared most about him getting through all of this.
"Sometimes it's best to let it all out, to get things off your chest and move forward without all that weight on your shoulders," Valery said with an almost motherly tone, but she was careful not to push it too far. She just wanted him to know that she cared about him and that he didn't have to feel embarrassed around her.
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Location: Azbrian
Objective: Put his mother and father to rest
Tag: Valery Noble Valery Noble

Tears rapidly began rolling down his cheeks in a steady stream, his mentality to hold it together finally breaking before the master. Without hesitation, she came and wrapped an arm around his shoulders to pull him into her embrace, reassuring him it was alright to cry and let it all out. His resistance to keeping strong finally gave in at that moment, allowing him to start releasing the emotion he had been holding for the past few years.

A choked cry was heard at first, preluding to even bigger reactions that were forcing their way through his soul. Sobbing loudly, he gripped Master Noble tightly and finally mourned the death of his parents. Until now he never was able to do such a thing. Ever since the gangsters took him in they forced him into a permanent survival mentality, one that only cared for himself and nothing else at the time. Now that he was free, the thoughts of his parents had only but grown on him since the start of his training.

In her grip, his body was shaking from how much heartbreak was going through him. He was struggling to control himself and cool down as wave after wave crashed into his mind "Why.... why them!" he cried out with a hint of aggression in his voice, hinting of another emotion that was starting to formulate inside of him "I-I could have saved them!" Silas croaked this time, lying to himself without even knowing it. In reality, there was nothing that could have stopped the tragic event that happened here.

"T-they should be alive, it- it's all my fault!" the boy lied again. None of it was his fault, but instead the greed of individuals who didn't care what misery that achieved.
 

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Location: Azbrian
Valery: Appearance
Outfit: Factory Link
Lightsabers: Link!
"It's not your fault," Valery said as she pulled back from the embrace just a little, allowing her to look at him while they spoke. She felt his sadness but also the burning anger underneath. It was a powerful emotion Jedi sought to remain in control of, but everybody had a breaking point, and the loss of loved ones hurt like nothing else ever could.
She also couldn't tell him why, or say anything to lessen the pain — she could only offer support and slowly help him through.
"I'm so sorry, Silas. I know how much it hurts to lose people, but you can't blame yourself for what happened here. You didn't do this and while I know you want to protect everybody you care about, you can't always be there." she said, her hands shifting to the sides of his shoulders for a moment.
"I'm certain your parents were extremely proud of you. Let's make sure they always will be, and they wouldn't want you to blame yourself for this"
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Location: Azbrian
Objective: Put his mother and father to rest
Tag: Valery Noble Valery Noble

Silas seemed to let it go at that moment, allowing the built in emotion to rush out of him all in one go. He needed this to happen at some point, else it was sure to create unspeakable problems further down the line. The padawan whimpered as Master Noble comforted him, pulling away from the embrace a little to look at him in the eyes. All they held was pain, tortured from the memories that were firmly implanted into his mind from the tragedy that happened here.

He tried to speak when she said it wasn't her fault, but all that came out was a loud sob. His once strong mentality had finally been broken after all these years, forcing his emotions to roam freely throughout his body without a barrier to stop them. Silas finally met her gaze and silent listened to the master, tears still rolling down his cheeks from when the floodgates had opened. Valerys words were soothing, ones that showed care and comfort. She barely knew his past, yet Noble didn't judge him and instead supported him no matter what through his sadness. She was right though, it was impossible to be there for your loved ones all the time. Sometimes, all you needed to believe was that they'd look after themselves when the time came, no matter how it ended.

Somewhere, his parents would be looking down on him with pride. He didn't need to go down this path, but he went with his heart and chose a future that helped others have a brighter horizon. There was no greater honor than helping to create peace throughout the galaxy, a future he was sure his parents would have wanted too.

"Y-yea you're right..." he gasped with a quivering smile, sobbing out again from how happy that must have been for him "A-all I wished was that they were here to see it in the flesh... But I know, wherever I go they'll be right here," he said before putting a hand to his chest, hearing the fast beat of his heart pounding against his body. He knew they were standing with him now, watching over him as they always did back when he was nothing more than an innocent child.

Putting his head against her chest once more Silas pulled himself back into her calm embrace, slowly but surely letting go of the strong emotions that had overwhelmed him.

"I... I just want to make them proud and not let other people feel the same pain I've had. I know I can't sa-save everyone, but as long as one person finds peace from our actions my conscience can rest." Silas said in a lowered tone, his tense body beginning to loosen up in her grip from the emotional weight being lifted from his shoulders.
 
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n0m34qi.png
Location: Azbrian
Valery: Appearance
Outfit: Factory Link
Lightsabers: Link!
"Y-yea you're right..."
Valery's lips curled up into her usual comforting smile while she listened to him, her hands gently rubbing the sides of the shoulder the way a mother would comfort her own kids. While she certainly didn't know him extremely well yet, it hardly seemed to matter to the woman — she was here to help him, and her caring nature made it impossible not to treat him the way she would her daughter when she'd eventually be older and going through emotional times.
It was just the way Valery was wired.
"They will be with you, and they are proud." With him stepping closer, she shifted her arms around him and held him in the embrace again, for as long as he needed it. Slowly, his body seemed to relax and the way he talked about wanting to help others even in his own pain showed the strength he really had as a person.
It didn't matter that he was crying or letting out all his emotional pain — it took far more strength to confront it all and be honest about it. That was the first step to moving forward in life; honesty. Time and a focus on those things that bring joy will take care of the rest.
"As long as you stay true to who you are, and continue down this path you've chosen to follow, you'll be able to help a lot of people. I'm sure of it," she said, her gaze shifting down while a hand came up to the side of his face, and gently she'd wipe away a few tears with her thumb. "You have a kind and caring heart, and you've shown great potential already. I'll help you become the best Jedi you can be, and it's going to help many others find peace."
"I promise you that."
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Location: Azbrian
Objective: Put his mother and father to rest
Tag: Valery Noble Valery Noble

"Thank you..." he said silently to the master, hugging her tightly in his grip to try and cope what he was going through. In his case, hugs were always the best way to release whatever you had off your chest. His mother knew that well, and Master Valery seemed to share the same thought "I'm... i'm sure they will" he said with a small nod before pulling his head away slightly. He looked up to the woman with tears still rolling down his cheeks, thankfully more calmer but clearly still emotional.

"That's what I always strive to keep to my true self. I never want to be moulded into a different person, the way I am now is all I need to be" he croaked slightly, agreeing with what Valery said about his personality. He loved helping people, more so before himself. If that drive ever went away he wouldn't know what else to do. He couldn't help everyone, but he was determined to help as many people as he could before his last breath dawned. Silas would be selfless to the end...

"I know you will Master Valery, That's why I can trust you with my life. You put everything into your teachings and teach your students as if they were your own, I can't think of a better teacher." He smiled while Valery wiped away the remaining tears on his cheeks, showing some of the motherly love his very own mother used to do for him.

Silently, he slowly pulled himself away from her embrace and shyly smiled at her again in thanks. Backing away he finally found the strength to continue his path forwards towards the house. His mind was still suffering from the range of emotions going through his head, and he knew it wouldn't stop until his mind came to rest. The padawan walked bravely to the charred house and fell to his knees beside it, his hand reaching up and pressing against a wooden pillar. At first, Silas seemed to whimper silently to let out the rest of his remaining sorrow. Although, as seconds turned to minutes the souls of his parents found their new home in his heart. Finally reconnecting and putting their lost spirits to rest with him.

"They can rest now..." he said in an emotionless tone. Revealing his blue eyes once more, he turned back to look up to the master "One day, I will see their faces again. That's when my goal in the mortal world is complete, we cannot risk resting when so much evil still exists in the galaxy."
 
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n0m34qi.png
Location: Azbrian
Valery: Appearance
Outfit: Factory Link
Lightsabers: Link!
Valery looked down at the young Padawan as he pulled away from the hug, and offered him a most sincere smile — she was quite proud of how well he handled himself, and how much maturity he showed at his age. It was a sign that he had it within himself to become a great Jedi, but it was also important that he didn't try too hard to contain all his emotions.
To let it out the way he did now was important at times.
"I know you will Master Valery, That's why I can trust you with my life. You put everything into your teachings and teach your students as if they were your own, I can't think of a better teacher."
"I'm glad you feel that way about me. It's easy to be a good teacher when your students are as willing to listen and dedicated as you," she chuckled and patted him on the shoulder before it was time to continue this little journey. But unlike moments before, Valery remained close by his side while they walked up to the remains of his old home.
The emotions were still there in the Force, flowing alongside echoes of what happened here. But he wasn't alone, and he was ready to face this part of his past.
When Silas finally stepped up to the building and went down to his knees, Valery did keep some distance — this moment was his to use to ease the mind and move on. She would stay back and be ready to offer support or allow her silence to bring him comfort when his mind was too busy processing his thoughts and feelings.
"They can rest now..." he said in an emotionless tone. Revealing his blue eyes once more, he turned back to look up to the master "One day, I will see their faces again. That's when my goal in the mortal world is complete, we cannot risk resting when so much evil still exists in the galaxy."
"That's true to some extent, but the body and mind do need rest as well," Valery said calmly as she walked back over to him. "I'm sure you will be able to help a lot of people, but you can't help others if you are in dire need of help yourself. It's a lesson I had to learn the hard way."
"But everything is going to be alright, and one day you will find them again in the Force."
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Location: Azbrian
Objective: Put his mother and father to rest
Tag: Valery Noble Valery Noble

Throughout his time near the house Master Valery kept her distance and left him to mourn by himself. She was right in every aspect, he needed to let it all out now before it caused him problems in the near future. It was like a great weight was lifted off his shoulders when he opened his eyes. Now that his parents were with him, Silas could move on with them forever by his side. It wasn't just that, he had found a new friend to trust in the form of Valery Noble. Without a doubt, she and others close would make the best out of him.

"My mind has been suffering for a long time ever since their deaths. Now that they are with me, I can now truly focus on what is ahead of me. You're right Master Noble, I needed to do this. I dread to think what could of happened if I let it linger, but thankfully I won't have to now that my mind can cool down" he said with a shy smile back to her, slowly getting to his feet in front of the Jedi with a new found confidence inside.

Silas gave her a respect bow, in thanks for helping him make a start in recovering from his dark past. The things she had already done for him were already above and beyond, he didn't know there were good people left in the galaxy like her. Standing up straight again, his face began to return back to its usual serious expression. Bar from a few streaks of tears, he seemed to be calming down well from the whole situation.

"I'll always love them wherever they are, as they will with me. Nothing will change that, not for as long as I still breathe" he smiled in reflection, almost as if he had finally found his path again within the force. Silently, he walked past Valery and began walking back to the ship with Valery in tow "You know, one day I hope to resettle back on here when the time is right. I sense my time here hasn't been finished yet" he spoke out as he stood and turned back to the master with a warm smile.

"But, I think we both know there's still many good memories ahead before that don't you think?" he said with a more upbeat tone as he thoughtfully glared into her eyes for a few moments, his light blue eyes connecting with hers. In that moment, he knew Valery and himself were going to share more memorable like this together. Through that on the battlefield or life milestones.

With that, he finally grabbed hold of the ladder and climbed inside. The start of a new point in his life had officially began...
 

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