Solariel Eldara
Jedi Master
[video=youtube_share;XFGWr3HBen4]http-~~-//youtu.be/XFGWr3HBen4[/video]
Cast of Characters: Gandalf: General Ceel, Shadow Demon: Julius Octavian
Sorry, I just found that humorous.
But in all serious, I've decided to go back into retirement.
I'm tired. And in all honesty, I don't like the way I've become when I get online right now. The cataclysm from TGC has just taken away all of my energy and motivation to write and I've been taking it way too seriously. I'm defending a reputation that isn't there to begin with and in all honesty it's a reputation that I don't truly care about. When I came out of retirement a little over a year ago and returned to TGC, it was because I found out I had a terminal illness. Before that, I hadn't played seriously in years and I had out-grown role playing all together. However, with the news I received I just thought things would get better if I could get away for a while and be someone else; anyone else. But it turns out I was wrong.
I really hate to do this, but I am going to take a step back into the shadows for a while. Possibly forever. All I really wanted to do when I returned was write and admittedly I didn't want to write at TGC in the first place but the community I returned for has gone inactive. I started a couple of very serious characters at TGC as an alternative and I played quietly for 14 months before I started having an opinion on things again which turned out to be my own downfall. But in reality, TGC isn't the reason I am retiring. It's because that magic... that spark... is gone, and it has been for half a decade. I've tried to get it back and I just haven't found the motivation or muse, if you will to care enough to see anything through.
If I have taken this split too seriously, I apologize. For me it was my last chance at role playing but it was a chance that I myself didn't really want to begin with. Why I took it, I have no idea.
Since I haven't started anything major on an IC level here, I think it's the best time to call-it quits. I do sincerely wish this community and all of it's members the very best of luck and I hope that you all enjoy your time here. Who knows? Maybe I'll return when I can control myself but for right now, I am too infuriated to even focus. So it's best if I just take a step back and a deep breath and try to figure out what I really want to write and, if I decide to, do it without any OOC dialogue at all.
Best wishes,
Jules
Cast of Characters: Gandalf: General Ceel, Shadow Demon: Julius Octavian
Sorry, I just found that humorous.
But in all serious, I've decided to go back into retirement.
I'm tired. And in all honesty, I don't like the way I've become when I get online right now. The cataclysm from TGC has just taken away all of my energy and motivation to write and I've been taking it way too seriously. I'm defending a reputation that isn't there to begin with and in all honesty it's a reputation that I don't truly care about. When I came out of retirement a little over a year ago and returned to TGC, it was because I found out I had a terminal illness. Before that, I hadn't played seriously in years and I had out-grown role playing all together. However, with the news I received I just thought things would get better if I could get away for a while and be someone else; anyone else. But it turns out I was wrong.
I really hate to do this, but I am going to take a step back into the shadows for a while. Possibly forever. All I really wanted to do when I returned was write and admittedly I didn't want to write at TGC in the first place but the community I returned for has gone inactive. I started a couple of very serious characters at TGC as an alternative and I played quietly for 14 months before I started having an opinion on things again which turned out to be my own downfall. But in reality, TGC isn't the reason I am retiring. It's because that magic... that spark... is gone, and it has been for half a decade. I've tried to get it back and I just haven't found the motivation or muse, if you will to care enough to see anything through.
If I have taken this split too seriously, I apologize. For me it was my last chance at role playing but it was a chance that I myself didn't really want to begin with. Why I took it, I have no idea.
Since I haven't started anything major on an IC level here, I think it's the best time to call-it quits. I do sincerely wish this community and all of it's members the very best of luck and I hope that you all enjoy your time here. Who knows? Maybe I'll return when I can control myself but for right now, I am too infuriated to even focus. So it's best if I just take a step back and a deep breath and try to figure out what I really want to write and, if I decide to, do it without any OOC dialogue at all.
Best wishes,
Jules
