Private A Swing and a Miss

[Colette]

Valery Noble

There was so much beauty just beyond that barrier, or at least so Colette believed as she sat in the garden at the Noble homestead. The hammock swayed back and forth and nearly put her to sleep as she used her leg to push it. The excitement of the open world was infinitely more interesting than the restricted boundaries of a book.

Where was the action? Why was she reading to experience what she could experience for herself? Sure, history had a point but it was still just so incredibly boring. Skywalkers? Yawn. Some old family known for almost destroying the Jedi and yet also reviving it, and then almost destroying it again? And then, some other woman related to the man who the Skywalkers helped destroy the Jedi decides to just take up the name?

Was that helpful somehow? Did that add anything to Colette's education or was it just "kind of neat" to know? It was nonsensical, and she had no interest in it. Now, a good work out and a refresher on good dietary habits? Yes, please! History wasn't necessary to have a deep understanding of. It was best to just sort of get the gist of what was what and then delve deeper if needed.

Colette had put up a small tea set on the table in front of her, but that wasn't what ran through her mind. With each swing of the hammock she got just a little further and further away from reality until eventually she slipped into Dreamworld with the book as her unwilling pillow.

Ugh, history was so boring.

 

[Valery Noble]

Niv Hani

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Outfit: Factory Link | Wedding Ring
Tag: Colette

"You look entertained," Valery said, her voice a bit snappy in an attempt to gently wake Colette. In her hands, Valery held a tray with homemade cookies. The little ones weren't at home, or they would have been swarming around her already, so they were meant for Colette. Sure, she was on a strict diet that Valery helped her design, but cheat meals were very much part of it. Valery's cookies were on the list of things to enjoy on occasion.

"I made you some cookies," Valery continued if Colette were to wake up, while the tray was placed in front of her. She then sat down herself and looked at her oldest with a soft smile.

"I thought you might want a little break, so maybe we can chat or even train if you want to do something more active." She chuckled but knew they still had some things to talk about.

A lot happened recently, both good and bad.

 

[Colette]

Valery Noble

"Ugggghhh…" Colette groaned as she upheld the time-honored teenage tradition of making any noise she could to truly show how horrible the world was. "I'm still reading up on Palp-attin. I don't get how this man was able to evade the Jedi for so long. Were the Jedi stupid or something?"

Ooo, cookies! The kid reached out to grab one and shove it in her mouth. Sugar wasn't exactly her favorite thing but Valery already knew that. These were still less sweet than she was used to which Colette had to admit she hadn't expected. The cookies carried more of the flavor from the grain that they had been made with, and underneath it all she could also taste the dark chocolate that had hid within the core of this little baked good.

The energy surge was instant.

"I think a chat is good." Colette said with a nod as she began to gently swing the hammock back and forth again. "I've been thinking a lot in between exercises and reading, actually."

The kid rubbed her hand at the back of her neck.

"Like the other day or so, at Cora's knighting. Don't know if you noticed anything off about me that day?"

"... I did."

 

[Valery Noble]

Niv Hani

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Outfit: Factory Link | Wedding Ring
Tag: Colette

Valery snickered, "I wouldn't say stupid, but I do believe the Jedi of the Clone Wars made a lot of mistakes." Some worse than others, but all of them together had led to their downfall. To the darker times the Galaxy had to endure for many years to come. It was a lesson that Valery hoped Colette would pick up on, even if she wasn't the type to make those mistakes herself. She wasn't the type to want to lead armies or meddle in politics, after all.

With the cookies out on the table, Valery watched Colette dig in with quite a smirk. She was proud of her cookies and made them so they weren't quite as unhealthy as those you'd find in the store.

"I did notice, yeah," Valery said with a chuckle. "Both as a Mom and as your Master, I pick up on a lot of things. But I figured you'd want to talk about it when you felt ready, rather than have me push the subject." Seeing how she had been spending some time thinking, Valery hoped that had been the right decision.

She seemed calm enough, even if she had something on her mind.

"What made you feel that way?"

 

[Colette]

Valery Noble

"I don't know?!" Colette hissed at the question that seemed to poke at a sore spot she wasn't aware she even held onto. The kid caught herself and began to blink. That didn't feel like a natural response for her. Anger wasn't her thing and she hoped that it never would be, but here she was…

"Sorry." She mumbled and let in a deep breath. "I saw the way Ariana and Shan were talking and it just sort of… Ticked me off. Like she was doing something wrong."

"It's not really jealousy, because I'd never feel that. I was raised not to feel that." The kid seemed very certain of that. "But she winked at him and I just—"

"Got angry. Anger is not jealousy."

 

[Valery Noble]

Niv Hani

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Outfit: Factory Link | Wedding Ring
Tag: Colette

Valery watched Colette silently for a moment, smiled a little and nodded along. Then grinned, and it shifted into a teasing little smirk very quickly when it became painfully obvious that she was jealous, "That... is pretty much a textbook example of being jealous, Colette," Valery said with a chuckle.

She knew how embarrassing it was to be jealous, though, so she was quick to add, "But it's not a weird thing to feel it. I'm generally very calm and people don't expect this from me, but... I get jealous too. I have a husband who shows his romantic affection only ever towards me, but if some woman tries to flirt with him or even just looks the wrong way..." She snapped a cookie in half, and took a bite from one part of it.

"I also feel that weird tightness in my chest, and I can get sweaty palms or feel like I want to step in between. It's unnecessary, illogical and maybe even stupid, but it's just because of how much I love him." She looked at Colette, knowing that this implied she had strong feelings for Shan.

Perhaps not love in the same sense as what she had with Kahlil, but a teenage crush was a powerful thing too.

"What I'm trying to say is, jealousy happens to a lot of people. Talking about it usually helps the best."

 

[Colette]

Valery Noble

Colette squinted and glared at Valery. This wasn't jealousy, she had clearly stated as such just a minute earlier. It was clear though that Valery thought this was at least a little funny from the way that she seemed to grin.

"It's not funny!" Colette exclaimed and crossed her arms. "I'm supposed to control these emotions as a Jedi."

But Valery went on and Colette eventually relented.

"Okay, fine! Maybe I do care a lot about Shan, and maybe it made me a little jealous to see that someone else was interested in him as well." The kid crossed her arms. "Maybe if she hadn't been so pretty, I wouldn't have had to step in."

"With her soft skin and… Lips, and the hair. She was clearly a better deal than me."

 

[Valery Noble]

Niv Hani

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Outfit: Factory Link | Wedding Ring
Tag: Colette

"I know the feeling," Valery said with a much softer voice. "After I was scarred, I was self-conscious about my appearance for a long time, and while I wasn't really interested in people like that because of old rules, I still compared myself to others a lot. But... Colette, Shan really likes you, too." She chuckled again and offered her daughter a smile.

"You're a lot prettier than you give yourself credit for, and you're great fun." She grabbed another cookie and took a bite. "Guys like that a lot more than just how much time you spend on your hair and make-up. Especially someone like Shan." He didn't seem like the type to go chasing after girls to try and find the 'hottest' one.

Not that she didn't think Colette was good-looking — the young woman was very cute.

"Jealousy is the most frustrating if you keep it to yourself, though. Sometimes you should, if you can easily manage, but it's okay to have insecurities and talk about them. Doesn't have to be with Shan himself, but just... with whoever you think will help you get over that feeling."

 

[Colette]

Valery Noble

"I've… Cleaned up since I joined." Colette admitted and gave a firm push on the hammock so she could lift her leg up and cross it along with the other. "Didn't usually care about my looks until I met Shan to be honest."

"But I'm no Corazona, or Ariana, or Amani, or Valery…" Colette admitted as she began to stroke her hand and up along her arm. "I don't want to be like, well, them- and you, in that way. But what if eventually Shan will want that, and I don't?"

"I don't want to make him angry or upset, but I don't want to 'stop' being myself either." It was probably pretty clear that Colette was going off of a non-existent hypothetical she had thought about a lot before. "I am very bossy, but I don't want to change that either. I like me, but what if…"

"What if someone else makes Shan not want me?"

 

[Valery Noble]

Niv Hani

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Outfit: Factory Link | Wedding Ring
Tag: Colette

Valery thought about it for a moment, then started speaking, "Well, if that were to happen, then you two would at that point not be a good match. Being together with someone requires a lot more than being attracted to them. That is fun and it does matter, but if you spend a lot of time around someone, it's going to matter a lot more what they're like. So, while we do change over time, don't force yourself to be someone you're not."

Valery then smiled and placed a hand on Colette's shoulder, "But shan doesn't judge a book by its cover. Of course, he is attracted to you, and you are an attractive young woman, but he clearly likes you the way you are. I've seen the way he is around you." She chuckled and squeeze Colette's shoulder before withdrawing her hand again.

"So, it's more about what you feel ready for. If you like him and want to be close to him, or want to be his girlfriend, then take that step. If you don't, and he does want to be close to someone like that, it is possible for him to also find someone else he likes."

"We can be attracted to more than one person, after all. We can even be attracted to someone when we're already with someone."

 

[Colette]

Valery Noble

Colette gave her mast— Mother a weak smile and a small laugh burst through her nose; unseen, but not unheard. It made sense what she was saying, and Colette supposed that it made sense given she had loved the same man enough to have several children with him. And Kahlil had always been himself in all of that, same as Valery had been herself too. It was comforting to realize.

"I should talk to Shan." The kid said and sighed with a newfound measure of relief, small as it was. "And maybe apologize to Ariana for how I behaved."

She let that one linger for a bit.

"… But, maybe once I know what to say…"

"Did you and Kahlil ever feel like you were less of a match than when you started?" Colette asked and turned to look at Valery. "I mean, you're together now, but were things ever different?"

 

[Valery Noble]

Niv Hani

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Outfit: Factory Link | Wedding Ring
Tag: Colette

It felt good to hear Colette laughing again, and it seemed she even figured out where to go from here. Talking to Shan was definitely the best way to go about it, but Valery also agreed — she should do it when she felt ready, after a little bit of time to think about what she wanted to say.

This wasn't a situation she needed to rush.

"I'm sure he'll appreciate it. Just take your time and work things out." Valery said with a soft smile. Her expression seemed to shift a little when Colette asked her a question about Kahlil though. Just for a short moment, before she chuckled, "Not really, but we're a special case. We have a bond, a Dyad, that connects us on a much deeper level. If something troubles me, whether it's related to him or not, he'll know. Same thing in reverse."

"He and I have always worked out problems, and I truly believe he's my soulmate. Whenever he has been in my life, I've never wanted things to be different." She paused for a moment.

"But... he wasn't always in my life. Only a few years after Vera was born, I believed him to be dead for years. He himself believed he was, and encouraged me to move on. A... lot happened during that time, some of it involving other men. But I never felt a connection with anybody the way I had with him, so when I found out he was alive and brought him back..." she let out a happy little sigh.

 

[Colette]

Valery Noble

A dyad? Colette raised a curious brow. She'd obviously read of bonds and maybe they mentioned the things, but they weren't exactly things she had seen a need to memorize. While she liked Shan and enjoyed his company, they certainly didn't have anything that deep.

"That's rough." Colette frowned. "Good thing he's back then."

"Funny to think that so much can happen in such a short time." She mused. "I mean, I had only arrived a year ago. Or it feels like it was a year ago?" Colette chuckled. "I… Never pay much attention to the passing of time as much as, you know, keeping time when meeting or doing something."

"Ever get that feeling?" She asked Valery. "Like time just goes so fast and so slow all at once?"

 

[Valery Noble]

Niv Hani

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Outfit: Factory Link | Wedding Ring
Tag: Colette

"All the time," Valery said with a smirk, pun not intended. "Right now, I feel as if time is going really fast. The kids are all growing so much, and even something like Kahlil's return has been forever ago. But when he was taken, or when Vera had been kidnapped... I don't think time had ever felt that slow before."

It was a common occurrence, for time to feel faster when you were enjoying yourself, but these were extremes. Now, she was living her best life with her family, and she had gone through the absolute worst, too.

Perhaps one thing had felt even slower — her torture by Danton — but she decided against mentioning that.

"So... Shan, hm?" Valery chuckled. "He's a cute guy, but very much not a gremlin. What do you like about him?" she asked with genuine interest. She hoped her tone would make it clear that she wasn't going to tease.

 

[Colette]

Valery Noble

So Shan, hmmm?

"Yeahhhh…" Colette exhaled with a wistful smile. "We started talking after that history lesson you held on Tython, and he seemed like a kind person so I just kind of wanted to know him better."

"We talked about what happened on Pamarthe, I cried, he consoled me, and I guess it kind of grew from there?"

"Then I noticed these other things. His kindness, of course, but the way his lips seem to crease just a little at he sides when he laughs or smiles. The way he just can't seem to shut up once he starts getting uncertain of something…"

"He makes me feel good, happy, and I guess… That's it? I mean, more but, boiled down that's it?"

 

[Valery Noble]

Niv Hani

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Outfit: Factory Link | Wedding Ring
Tag: Colette

"Those sound like very good reasons to like him," Valery said with a motherly smile. A lot of these reasons reminded her of how she got with Kahlil. How he had comforted her when she was confronted with her past on New Cov. How he had fought those predators with his bare hands to keep her safe while she meditated.

...having to patch him up afterwards...

Valery shook her head to quickly get out of those thoughts and focused on Colette again, "Do you think you'd like to be more than just friends? I know you said you'd talk to him about what happened, but... taking that step is another thing entirely."

 

[Colette]

Colette's brows furrowed in confusion.

"More than friends?" She asked and shook her head. "What, like marry him?"

"I think you need to slow down a little there, Valery."

 

[Valery Noble]

Niv Hani

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Outfit: Factory Link | Wedding Ring
Tag: Colette

Valery pinched the bridge of her nose, closed her eyes and let out a soft sigh, "No, that's not what I meant." She chuckled, shook her head and opened her eyes to look at her daughter again. There was something adorable about young love, especially when both sides of it had no real idea about how things worked.

In some ways, she was just as oblivious as Shan.

"There are a lot of steps between liking someone and getting married. First, it's important to openly express interest. You could become boyfriend and girlfriend, which means you commit to a relationship. Then, one day, you'll think about living together and being an even closer part of each other's lives."

"Marriage comes after that."

 

[Colette]

Valery Noble

What was so frustrating? Colette watched as Valery rubbed her brow and just got more confused.

"But, that just sounds like friendship with extra steps." She said and shook her head. "He already knows I am interested because of the kisses, he is a boy and a friend, which makes no sense that such a thing would mean exclusivity, and I don't even own a home of my own so how could—"

Colette groaned with irritation as she rolled her eyes.

"Turns out there are still parts of this galaxy that just doesn't makes sense." The girl crossed her arms and huffed. "So, what, are Cora and Makko about to get married or something? They kiss, they are of two different genders, and they live together, and…"

"Wait…" Colette stopped. "Do they have to be opposite sex?"

She thought back to her time on Ophus. Evidence said no? In hushed tones, of course, but out in the rest of the galaxy there were plenty of people of the same sex that seemed to date. Colette let out another confused and frustrated sigh.

"So, I am confused." Colette said. "Shan isn't my boyfriend, and Cora is not my girlfriend?"

"And…" She closed her eyes and rubbed her eyebrows. "God damn it. All this love business is so…"

"So overthought. You either like someone or you don't, does it have to be more than that?!"

 

[Valery Noble]

Niv Hani

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Outfit: Factory Link | Wedding Ring
Tag: Colette

Valery just chuckled and reached out to pat Colette atop her shoulder, "Love is a complicated thing, but there are reasons for the steps I mentioned. Being married, traditionally, means you're turning your relationship into something meant to last until death. It... doesn't always go that way, but that's what it should be."

"As boyfriend and girlfriend — and yes, same gender is possible too — you commit to a relationship but you're also still figuring out if it's something that you'd want to last forever. Liking someone or even being sexually attracted to someone doesn't mean they'll be a good partner for you long-term."

It was confusing, Valery knew, but she wanted to give the proper answer at least once. From there, it was far better to learn by experiencing, rather than listening to lectures about love.

"It also doesn't have to be more than just liking someone. There are people who never get married and still live together or have kids. There's... not really a right or wrong way, beyond doing what makes you happy and comfortable."