A Silver Lining

[Connor Harrison]

”Ok that's good, yes you're right. That's the basics, and from there it's about learning to let it form part of you to control and understand, so enhance your own ability and strengthen your resolve. After we've eaten and when you're happy, we will head out to the gardens and begin.”

He leant on his elbows and picked at the dry bread.

”And when I'm not here, I'm wherever the job takes me. Well, the job and every other drama that crops up. I normally stay on larger fleet ships in travel, or with allies in residences from the Outer Rim to touching on Sit space.”

With a small shrug, he continued.

”And sometimes my relationships here have been testing, partly my own fault, and I've felt I couldn't be here without it causing trouble. However, things are changing and I am hopeful for the future.”

He grinned at Chastity.

”I'm painting a less than impressive picture aren't I? Jedi Master full of demons and a scarred past? You sure you're happy learning from me?”

[member="Chastity Lunelle"]

 

[Chastity Lunelle]

Chastity finally took a few bites of her food, forcing it down despite her anxious stomach. If their garden lesson included rigorous training exercises, then she would need her strength. When Connor talked of traveling in large fleets, she leaned forward with utter fascination. Chastity had always felt wanderlust stirring in her veins, and Aduba III was ridiculously small and uncultured as planets go. She was dying to see what Ossus was like. Or Correllia. Or even Coruscant even though it was crawling with Sith. Then there was the whole swath of the galaxy known as Unknown Space. Could one even see it all in one lifetime?

When her Master mentioned his demons and scarred past, she shook her head, vehemently nodding in an affirmative gesture.

“I’m positively sure that I want to learn from you Master Harrison,” she insisted. “When I look at you, I don’t see someone with demons and scars, I see a beautiful man who is kind and generous. You brought me here and took a genuine interest in me and my well-being. No one's ever done that before. Well, other than my family."

She suddenly blushed and looked down at her waiting breakfast, realizing that maybe she had been too candid.

“If you ever want to talk about your demons or your scars,” she added, when she could finally muster up the courage to look at him again, that is.

“I’m a pretty good listener.”

She was the kind of girl whose curiosity would always get the best of her.

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

With an understanding smile, Connor nodded and dipped his finger in the red jam on his plate.

”Hey, come on. Don't worry - it's ok. It's the natural path for a rogue like me. I'm the one who can take the hits to pave a way for others to follow safely. I have nothing except what you see before you, and if I can understand the Dark to fight it, then I will be the one to sacrifice myself for the good of those I serve with.”

Pausing, he mocked being sick and grinned again.

”Now look, we will take it easy today. I'll get you a personal quarter if it's the last thing I ever do, although it's been nice having someone around I must say. And later, perhaps if you work hard, I will share some stories of what dark times I've experienced and show you those scars as a warning.”

His voice went quiet and he learned forward.

”Don't talk to any strange Sith men or women.”

The smile made it clear he was breaking the ice that surrounded her nerves, still evident to him even if she didn't think so.

[member="Chastity Lunelle"]

 

[Chastity Lunelle]

As her Master mocked himself, and joked about the Sith, Chastity let out a long, throaty laugh. Connor was definitely a far cry from the stiff and unsmiling headmasters she had to endure at the Arkanian boarding school.

“I guess that means the ones selling cookies are out of the question,” she returned, scrunching up her nose and covering her mouth as she giggled again.

When her Master mentioned getting her a personal quarter, Chastity gave off an almost imperceptible frown, but quickly, her smile returned. She was starting to feel a bit more comfortable staying with her Master. And safe, too. What if the Sith attacked the Temple on Voss? She didn’t want him to think she was ungrateful for all the work he was putting into it, so she clammed up.

“So what does 'taking it easy' at the Jedi temple consist of?” she asked intently, taking a few more bites of her bread. Maybe it meant that she could meander around the gardens a bit and explore the hidden depths of the Temple library. Either way, Chastity felt content and up for anything.

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

”Taking it easy? I'm not sure actually.”

He drummed his fingers on his chin and dipped the last piece of his crusty bread absently in the fruit. It was a good question as he never had really taken it easy in the Temple for years.

”Well I think it comprises of long walks in the garden, meditation in private chambers...um...doing other things...” he chuckled and dismissed it with a wave of the hand, ”...things like that. We'll find things to do I'm sure.”

A warm flush ran over him and the juxtaposition of words wasn't the best. However, with a wipes of the hands, Connor placed them on the table.

”Right, young lady, are you done? Let's say we start your journey and see what you're made of as my Padawan?”

[member="Chastity Lunelle"]

 

[Chastity Lunelle]

Chastity smiled when Connor mentioned the gardens. She was eager to get back there and take a stroll around that stony path amid its waterfalls and vistas. When he mentioned "other things," she laughed.

This time her blush had receded and her gaze met his squarely. It seemed to be a sign that she was getting more comfortable joking around with him. She guessed by the way his cheeks reddened this time, that he had said something off-color.

"Now you've got me curious about those other things!" she admitted with a playful grin.

When Connor asked her if she was ready, Chastity wiped her hands against one another and jumped to her feet.

"I couldn't be more ready, Master Harrison." The young Padawan stepped aside and gestured outwards with her hand. "Lead the way."

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Connor smiled as he stood, and moved over from the seat to his wardrobe.

”You seem eager enough, so let me grab my gear and we'll head out to the gardens.”

Opening the wooden door, he scanned his gear and didn't see anything he needed he didn't already have. His com by his side and his Padawan. The saber would wait for now. The Force would be their tool today, and it was more for Chastity to show what she could do. He closed the door, and gestured for her to follow.

”Onwards.”

Walking her through the corridors, looking ever more the Jedi she wanted to become in her tunic, Connor in his black trousers and vest, he explained that she would set the pace today and that it was about finding out what she could do. It took minutes for them to leave the second floor and down out the rear of the Tempe, past the hangar and down into the garden via the orchard.

Connor took Chastity at a steady pace under the trees towards one of the clearings.

”Nice apples,” he pointed to the tree in front of them, ”on those trees. Can you get one for me - without touching them with your dainty hands please.”

Slow steps - apples, at the end of the day to one in tune with the Force were no different to starships to control with the power.

[member="Chastity Lunelle"]

 

[Chastity Lunelle]

The first thing that struck Chastity when she followed Connor out to the orchard was how beautiful the temple grounds were in the bright morning light. With a light breeze blowing and tiny iridescent butterflies flitting around in intricate patterns with meanings known only to them, it was an oasis of tranquility. She pressed one hand on Connor's arm, absently letting him escort her along so that she could fully absorb her surroundings.

Master and Padawan stopped at a large apple tree on the edge of a clearing. He instructed her to get down one of the apples without touching it.

Chastity's track record with telekinesis was unreliable at best. Half the time she lost her concentration due to her own impatient frustration with the daunting task. When it failed, it was because she psyched herself out. When it worked, it seemed to be a miraculous accident. Her heart beat boldly in her chest as she closed her eyes, remembering the words of her Arkanian trainers. They said to imagine yourself exerting your will over the object through the Force. She extended her arms in front of her, with her fingers bent in a grabbing position.

She could feel the Force flowing strongly through her, from the ends of each strand of hair to her the tips of her fingers. It was as if the air around the Temple itself was rich with the life energy. C'mon, Chast. You can do it. She curled her fingers inward and one of the apples fell down off of its leafy branch, and rolled onto the grass. The young Padawan opened her eyes, and gave him a questioning look. Ok, it wasn't the most graceful act of telekinesis ever, but she would take it.

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Connor stood silently and watched Chastity, looking far more like a Padawan now she was dressed in the right gear and starting training. Her stance was good, her arms fine, but she was over thinking it - he could feel her straining. The apple moved and fell to the grass. He'd certainly seen worse.

”Well you got the apple down from the tree, that's good. It's a start.”

He walked around to the opposite side of her, the tree hanging low near his head.

”Try lifting it to my palm - remember, don't TRY to take it, just DO it. The Force is at your control, use it to wrap around and take the fruit and see it in your mind moving to my hand. You can do this. Believe that you can do this, and it will happen.”

Connor unfurled his hand and held out his palm, a gentle nod for her to try again.

[member="Chastity Lunelle"]

 

[Chastity Lunelle]

Chastity nodded, listening to Connor’s encouraging words. Although her first try wasn’t much, her success bolstered her confidence.

“I will do this, Master,” she told him with a fearless smile. “Just watch.”

Chastity closed her eyes and rolled her shoulders in a circle, forcing out the tension. Feel the Force flow into you, Chast. The Padawan took a few deep breaths and repeated her Master’s words in her mind. Don't try to take it, just do it. The Force is at your control. She called upon the energy, letting it fill every cell, every molecule. Then she reached out with the Force, while visualizing its shape and color. It’s skin and stem. Finally, with she wrapped the energy around the apple and plucked it off the tree, floating it down to meet Connor’s palm.

Her eyes snapped open and upon seeing the fruit sitting squarely in his hand, she clasped her hand over her mouth, laughing.

“Oh my stars, I can’t believe I did it!”

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

The solid fruit landed in his palm gently, and with a gentle throw, Connor had the apple up in the air and caught it again. Looks good enough to eat.

”Well done,” he said, a small smile to give her that praise that was so important.

While he knew this first day wasn't exactly going to be so exciting; chasing down pirates, saving slaves or fighting Wampas, it was important for Chastity to understand her limits, allow herself the chance to embrace her path and to understand how effective she would be.

”Ok, do the same again but take three apples and drop them gently before me, and do it whilst walking around the tree.”

Walking and using the Force? Women should be good at multi-tasking so this was a piece of cake in theory.

[member="Chastity Lunelle"]

 

[Chastity Lunelle]

The second task Connor asked her to do may have seemed like a minor parlor trick to most Force users, but to Chastity it seemed daunting. She turned her gaze to the apple tree and studied it, mapping out her path. The level of concentration it took to mold the Force energy around the apples would take all her focus, so she could easily see herself bumping smack into a tree. A long sigh escaped her lips as she wrestled with her self-doubt. You’re psyching yourself out as usual. Just trust yourself, and trust the Force. Let it guide you.

Any more stalling would allow time for her negative thoughts to creep in, so Chastity began to take a few steps around the tree, concentrating on the first apple which easily she plucked out of the tree. Then, focusing on keeping the first apple held aloft, she let a second branch of the Force wrap around the second apple. All the while she measured her footsteps so that she was slowly circling the tree. The lesson was surprisingly easier than she had anticipated, and soon she had walked the circumference of the tree, and there were three shiny apples sitting right at Connor’s feet. She did it! It felt amazing to be understanding and controlling her power with more finesse than back at boarding school. Spreading her hands, she walked towards Connor with a proud smile.

“Not too shabby, eh Master?”


[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Nodding, Connor crouched down and picked up the apples, holding two in each hand.

”And you've just helped me pick the next batch of jam for my famous bread breakfast. You can help with that though as you're the farm girl, probably far better at that sort of thing than me.”

He started to lead her through the garden slowly as the birds started an early morning call above.

”I know it's small, but you can work on this basic control of the Force now - from fruit, to rocks, to one day other living beings and even starships. All objects are as big or little as your eyes make them, but for the Force they are all insignificant. You can toss a ship up in the air as you would rock without breaking a sweat. It's all about how much you can control the Force, and make sure YOU are the Master of it, not the other way around.”

Connor turned a small hedge and stopped.

”Ok. Plant an image in my head, Chast. Anything you want. I will tell you what is it when you've done it.”

He gave her a smile and a flash of the blue eyes again.

[member="Chastity Lunelle"]

 

[Chastity Lunelle]

Connor walked her through the temple garden, now redolent with the smell of unknown flora. The sun warmed her skin and and for a moment, she longed to stretch out in the dewy grass and bask in its heat, like a cat in a sunbeam. She knew it was frivolous thought. There was so more work to be done today, and plenty of time to rest later.

Connor talked of the Force and how one day, Chastity may be able to control objects big and small. Her eyes widened when her Master mentioned living beings and starships. That kind of power in the hands of someone with a reckless regard for sentient life was a horrific thought. No wonder the Jedi were eternally fighting the Sith.

Then, Chastity was given her next task, to plant an image in the Jedi Master’s handsome head. So many pictures flashed through her head, things she could try planting. Since she had been thinking about it before, she quickly landed on the image of the cat and the the sunbeam. It was a bit random, but it would have to do. Anxiety gripped her when she thought going into Connor’s mind. What would she see in there? Well, only one way to find out.

“As you wish, Master,” Chastity said with a confident nod that hid her nerves, and then closed her eyes. Swallowing audibly, she branched out with the Force, and just like she had done with the apples, she let it surround the space around the Jedi Master, focusing in specifically on his mind. She visualized entering his mind, and just as she had imagined it, she was in. There she placed her image of the cat stretching out in a sunbeam and then slipped back out again, reluctant to delve further. She didn’t want to violate his privacy thoughts after all.

Her eyes snapped open and she bit her lip. The young Padawan's grey blue eyes searched his intensely.

“What do you see?”

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

An exercise he’d done lots of times, and knew the outcome before she even closed her bright eyes. Connor stood and waited patiently for the image to cloud his vision for split second before receding – it would be a surreal, innocent and peaceful image. They always were.

A flash of a cat came to his sight, for a split-second, bathing and dormant in light, before it went, like a memory Connor simply thought about and then was gone. As expected, Chastity looked a little nervous.

”I saw you in another life – a playful cat, relaxing and lazing around. I take it that would be you in another life?”

He smiled and started walking again.

”Don’t worry about going into a mind to place a vision, you won’t find anything in there if you don’t want to look – however, that does lead me to asking to you go into my mind again and take something I will leave for you.”

Stopping under another tree, the garden would be assaulting her senses; peace and tranquillity, with the drip feeding of having her concentrate and keep her Force aura alert and active. Very basic, but very important.

”You found my aura, placed a vision in there, and hoped I’d see it. That was fine. Now you must peek beneath my aura to see what my thought it – the Jedi use this to influence others, to sway their conscious thought if the situation demands it, but never for manipulation and abuse. I will think on a memory, and lower my resistance for you to find it and take it. Be confident, and be assertive. And be in control.”

Connor maintained eye contact with the Padawan, and thought about not a memory, but a vision – a vision of Chastity alone, afraid and surrounded by temptation in a dark place. It wasn’t specific, but Connor felt it would happen with her eagerness to succeed, to help and to fight. A walk in the garden wasn’t going to be all roses, not with his training to get the best from her.

[member="Chastity Lunelle"]

 

[Chastity Lunelle]

It was such an amazing phenomenon to be able to touch someone’s mind like that. To project your thoughts onto the canvas of their mind in a way that didn’t need words. Chastity was fascinated by the concept.

“You’re absolutely right, Master Harrison, the image I projected depicted a cat in a sunbeam. Although I didn’t quite consider that the cat might be me.” The Padawan let out a self-deprecating laugh. “I guess I was lazy in another life. Perhaps in this one, I’ll get a chance to make up for it.”

The second thing Connor wanted her to do was to peek behind his aura, and go further into his mind. Her stomach knotted up at the thought, but she nodded her head, hanging on to his words for comfort. Be confident. Be assertive. And be in control.

Chastity gazed into his eyes and penetrated his aura, passing through the membrane of his mind. She didn’t know what to expect, but it certainly wasn’t the vision waiting there for her. Her world was enveloped by an inky blackness that crawled down the walls of her psyche, like sticky ooze. The Padawan saw herself in the middle of what was becoming an endless void of black. She was fearful, not only of the darkness itself, but also of the way it pulled at her, beckoning her to step towards it, and become one with it. To lose herself completely. No more fears. No more doubts. Just oblivion.

When she opened her eyes, she looked down to see her hands shaking. She placed a trembling hand on her chest and felt her heart racing uncontrollably, as if it would fly out of her chest. Breathless, she stumbled back a few paces and dropped her gaze to the grass.

“I-I don’t feel so well.”

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Connor saw it happen in her eyes, and her body language. This was a harsh lesson, and it pained him to do it but he had to. For her sake, if nothing more. He slowly let the apples fall to the floor and waited for her to join him back in the present, and she did. A thousand thoughts raced over her face, the Force telling him what he needed to know. She was confused, scared, sick.

As she stumbled back, Connor stepped forward one step to match her one step back.

”That is a breathless whisper of what the Dark Side looks like, Chastity. It will be in places you fear to look, and if you are fearful, it will wrap itself around you and beckon you in. It lusts for fear and weakness and thrives on it.”

He placed two fingers on his Temple and focused on her mind.

I can’t afford to lose you the way I nearly lost myself.

Then, turning to embrace the sun breaking through the clouds as it rose, the temperature was cool and comfortable. A siren could be heard in the silence, signifying the hangar was coming into operation and a ship was incoming. Connor turned back to the girl.

”Look again, and this time speak to me without opening your mouth and fight the image you see with your strength.”

This time Connor thought about a similar image, but now it was Connor distorted and angry, standing on one side of her, with Connor calm and hopeful, on the other. It was a classic confrontation of Light and Dark; good and evil; nightmare and reality. But which one was reality, and which way would she turn?

He wouldn’t stop her. He couldn’t.

[member="Chastity Lunelle"]

 

[Chastity Lunelle]

His words came through like a whisper on the wind. I can’t afford to lose you the way I nearly lost myself. Her Master cared about her and that instantly made her feel stronger. He also knew how it felt to fall. How better to fight something if you knew all of its strengths and weakness. She took a deep breath and tried to shake off her unease. Stop acting like a scared little nuna, and be a woman, Chast. Be a warrior.

In his clear baritone, Connor asked her to look inside his mind again and to fight the image he would show her next. Every cell in her body wanted to resist, desperate to hide from the darkness she had felt. Be a warrior, Chast. Face your fear. She pushed herself to perform the task, and once inside her Master’s mind, she was confronted with a different image, one of Connor himself standing on two ends of the opposite spectrum. The Dark Connor was a haunting figure, distorted and cruel, but even as he horrified her, he inexplicably attracted her. Her pulse raced out of control. Chastity wanted to run to the Dark one, but with gritted teeth pried her focus away from him and concentrated on the other figure, the one who walked in the Light. She ran to him instead, and when she did, only then did the image dissipate.

“Whew,” she sighed, opening her eyes and blinking as they adjusted in the bright sunlight. Her legs were still wobbly, but she seemed visibly less disturbed overall. Her brows knitted with confusion. There was one thing Chastity still didn’t understand.

“Why is the Dark Side so…” Here she fumbled for the right words.

“...seductive?”

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

As she came back, and Connor had seen it all. It worried him, but at the same time he understood her thoughts and the action she had taken entwining her aura with his. Taking Chastity by the arm, leaving the fruit on the ground which mattered not for now, he walked towards one of the streams. The diegetic noise would be a calming mechanism.

”You tell me, Chastity. Why is the Dark Side so seductive to you? I felt your hesitation, and your curiosity. What was the temptation and why didn’t you follow it through?”

Her first day of training has taken an unexpected turn, one that was more intrusive than Connor would want, but he enjoyed this psychological exploration of her standing with him.

”I would have understood your want.”

It was better to push her now rather than later when he couldn’t save her from the dangers out there.

[member="Chastity Lunelle"]

 

[Chastity Lunelle]

Connor offered her his arm, and Chastity gladly took it. As they walked towards the bubbling stream, the young Padawan inhaled deeply, letting the fresh air and the sound of the ripples calm the inner hurricane that had rattled her emotions. Her breaths began to slow as she stared intensely at a small school of tiny minnows that whipped left and right in unison. She deeply contemplated Connor’s question.

“I don’t know,” she admitted. “But I'll try my best to explain it. It’s as if the Dark Side promises to take those parts of me that I don’t like, and use them to transform me into...well, something else, I suppose.” Her hair fell over her face, as she shook her head in frustration. “I’m doing a terrible job of describing it but, it’s as if the Dark Side seeks to take me to another state of being. Not only that, but, well…”

Again, she struggled with words. There were other emotions that the dark side made Chastity face, ones she didn’t want to think about because they lead down a road to impure thoughts. She was uncomfortable speaking about that facet of it, so she simply let her words trail off.

"I resisted it because I had to. The Dark side is the path to evil." She searched his eyes for guidance. She knew deep down that perhaps it wasn't that black and white, but Chastity had always been an all-or-nothing type of girl.

"Isn't it?"

[member="Connor Harrison"]