A Silver Lining

[Connor Harrison]

Following the transport above, Connor’s head turned to see it bank over the temple, and he looked at Chastity watching it also. It was as if this was a whole new world to her, and he was the one introducing her to it and taking her forward on a path unknown to them both.

”I will do be best, Chastity. I also see myself as a warrior. Here in the Silvers we have clans, focusing on various skills. Warriors, healers, diplomats, each able to offer those who have the unique abilities to be of greatest use. I myself fall into being a warrior, on the front line and willing to sacrifice myself before others.”

He led them around the front of the Temple once more, back where they started.

”Tomorrow, I will start your training. There is no expectations from you, so don’t worry – my methods aren’t always the norm, but then, what do you expect from who has danced the line between Light and Dark.”

With a teasing flash of the eyes at that statement, Connor took his com again and spoke.

”Control can I have an update on available quarters please for one female. And I require comfortable robes and training vest, boots, belt and trousers,” he turned to Chastity as he spoke, ” I'd say 5”8 and a nice slender build. Thank you.” The com was pocketed again.

”So. You best come back with me until we get something sorted for you, I’m sorry it’ s taking a while, usually it’s sorted before an arrival but I wasn’t sure you’d be here, so it’s my fault.”

[member="Chastity Lunelle"]

 

[Chastity Lunelle]

Dancing between Light and Dark. She couldn’t imagine what a delicate balance that must be. The trainers at her boarding school put the fear of the Maker itself into Chastity when it came to the Dark Side of the Force. It was not to be trifled with lest it consume you and eventually destroy you. They even showed the students a “scared straight” Holofilm of wrinkled old Sith Lords torturing people, just to make sure the point was crystal clear. As expected, the film horrified Chastity so deeply, she had to sleep with the lights on in her bedroom for weeks on end.

“You walked between the Dark and Light?” she asked, her tone a mix of curiosity and surprise. She paused, studying him for a moment, and then asked him another question, this time in a more hushed tone, almost as if her boarding academy teachers were hovering nearby.

“How does the Dark Side feel, Master Harrison?”

When Connor apologized for the quarters taking a while, Chastity lightly slapped him on the arm, a playful gesture.

“Now its your turn to stop apologizing," she teased. "You’ve done so much for me already. I’m not worried about it, at all. Wherever you put me, I'll be fine with I'm sure."

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

”How does the Dark Side feel…?

Her voice was like a key, unlocking the memories and feelings of the Dark Side that were dormant in his mind. Even her tease didn’t really grab him as he thought about how it felt. She asked a question, and he would answer. Leading here away from the grand opening of the Temple, Connor took a little walk away from the stairs leading up; two figures standing before their Order.

”The Dark Side. Now, that’s something I’ll teach you about in time, but I can tell you, Chastity, it feels all-powerful and addictive. It strips away the worries, the hesitations and the doubts you’ve put on yourself, and allows you to do whatever you need to do in order to be something mighty.”

As she would learn – Connor was nothing like the others, and didn’t have conventional methods. He started to walk around her, and teased his fingers across the nape of her neck.

”Feel that? It’s what the Dark Side feels like snaking into your body once you embrace it and have unleashed hell – you feel relaxed, you tingle and you feel calm.”

Completing his circle, he snapped his fingers in front of her.

”But whilst you feel this up here,” he gently placed a finger on her temple, looking at her, ”it starts to eat away at you in here,” he placed his palm on her torso, under her chest.

”It rids you of control, of judgement and of morality and you end up hurting those you cared for most as you think you can do anything and everything to make the galaxy better, when all you’re doing is slowly killing your humanity as you become a slave to the Darkness. It takes over your thoughts, your feelings and your control.”

Connor brought down his hands.

”One day you’ll see the marks the Dark Side can leave on you – my body is a canvas of failure how what the Dark Side did to me over the years and I remember that every day when I look in the mirror. It’s something I can’t let you experience, because all it will bring you, when you look at yourself, is pain. And you’re worth more than that – we need to be the light that cuts through the dark and lets others follow safely.”

[member="Chastity Lunelle"]

 

[Chastity Lunelle]

The way Connor spoke of the Dark Side was vastly different than her boarding school teachers. They had mentioned its consumptive powers, yes, but had painted the picture with a more heavy-handed brush. Connor made the Dark Side sound as alluring as an opiate. How wonderful would it be to throw your worries to the wind and bludgeon down all your self-doubt? If that’s what the Dark Side was, no wonder people fell to it. Especially the weak willed ones.

As Connor walked slowly behind her, Chastity arched a brow. When his touch came, his warm fingers gently playing on her neck, her back first straightened and then arched slightly, relaxing into it. He circled around and snapped his fingers, continuing his lesson. She was trying to listen but her flustered breaths were quickening. She wasn’t sure what she was feeling, but whatever it was it made it impossible to pay attention to his words. She swallowed audibly and feigned listening, nodding her head at the appropriate times. She had never even held hands with a boy, much less felt that.

When he talked about his scars, she snapped out of her reverie. She blew out the breath she’d been holding in one long whoosh. She was still very curious about the Dark Side, and how it scarred him, but she didn’t want to pry.

“I want to be the light as well,” she agreed, then she corrected herself with an edge of conviction in her breathless tone. “No, not want. I will be the light.”

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Watching her reaction, it seemed to Connor that the words that bombarded her had the right effect. She looked confused, and frozen to the spot. And to think he had given her the lighter version of the Dark Side, since she was new and fresh-faced.

”That’s a good attitude. You WILL be the light for others to see and follow. The Dark Side, at the end of the day, it will either kill you or have you kill yourself as you try to obtain glory that is always out of reach.”

He gently took her arm and started back to the Temple, a comforting sight that would soon evoke a protective and caring shell for her

”Yes, the Jedi may be a little more methodical in what they do, and at times frustrating, which is why I’ve embraced my status as a rogue, but I will do what I can on the side of the Light to protect the galaxy from the Dark. I’d rather keep my humanity and self-control than surrender it to some warmonger who…well, it’s just not worth the pain, Chastity. If you ever feel you want to talk about the Dark Side or understand it, please come to me. I will do what I can to help you.”

The steps were beneath them, moving up one at a time to the grand hall, invited in by the double doors that were always open during the day. He turned to her with a small sigh.

”Ok – do me a favour? Your first test. Make your way back to my quarters, on the first floor, remember. I’m going to see what’s happening about a place to reside in temporarily and get your clothing if it’s not already waiting for you. You think you can do that and not end up in the catacombs where the womp rats reside?”

Now it was his turn to tease.

[member="Chastity Lunelle"]

 

[Chastity Lunelle]

Chastity laughed and rolled her eyes at her Master, looking more like a typical teenager than a Jedi Padawan for a moment.

“If I get lost, just look for the catacombs and womb rats, got it.”

Shaking her head, she gave him a little wave and then whirled on her heel, heading back to Connor’s quarters. She wound through the temple, padding up the stairs to the first floor and was pleased that she found her way back to her Master's residence with no problem. Chastity 1 Womp rats 0.

Once inside, the young Padawan slipped out of her sandals and stretched out on the bed. Studying the ceiling, she reflected on Connor’s description of the Dark Side of the Force. She told herself that she wanted to know more about the Dark Side so that she knew how to fight it, but deep down she knew there was a part of her that harbored a morbid curiosity for it. By the Maker, she had a plethora of self-doubt and insecurities to feed it. She couldn’t help but wonder: Would she be able to dance between the Light and the Dark, like her Master? Or would she fall?

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Watching her go, Connor smiled to himself and moved away to the administration offices for the Silver Jedi. Not like a business, but more a place where droids and a handful of Jedi helped keep the Temple running. At the end of the day, clothes had to be washed and repaired, obtained from manufacturers and modified. Records of all those in the Temple had to be updated, as well as security and supplies.

Connor greeted the Gran at the security door and passed through to speak to the human on duty. It was skeleton staff, so that explained the lack of communication. The Jedi, at the end of the day, ran as well as any other organisation could when times were quiet.

With cream and brown tunic and robe over one arm and a black and white vest and combat trousers in the other, topped off with brown boots on top, it was safe to say Connor had his hands full and sighed at the fact he was lugging all this around. He was a Master of the Jedi - not maid.

A few excusing words here and there as he went upstairs and out down the far corridor to his quarters, the door was still open, thankfully, and Connor slid inside - too late seeing Chastity on the bed as that's where he was heading, like it or not before he dropped everything.

”Mind yourself...” he said as the clothes fell down, "...ok trouble, one set of casual robes and one set of training gear and boots.”

He rested his hands on his hips, nodding to himself as he caught his breath.

”These should do for now, but we can change if needed. Oh, and when you're out in the field we'll get your some armour like mine. Your belt will have enough space for what you need and room, in time, for the lightsaber. That's everything.” He was talking to himself more than the girl.

Connor looked up, and felt a wave of conflict in her.

”You alright?”

[member="Chastity Lunelle"]

 

[Chastity Lunelle]

When Connor returned with armfuls of clothing and dropped them on the floor, she jumped up off the bed. Kneeling down on the floor, she smiled as she inspected each garment. Brown Padawan robes just like she saw draped over other Jedi. Her gaze rose to his and she gave him a wide, easy smile.

"I absolutely love my new garments. Thank you, Master Harrison."

He must have picked up on her distressing thoughts about the Dark Side because next he asked her if she was ok. It was so sweet of him to be concerned. She probably should have opened up to him about her colliding thoughts about the Dark and the Light. He was here to help her after all. But for some reason she couldn't bring herself to tell him. The shame she felt over her unhealthy curiousity about the Dark Side washed over her, and its tides left her feeling weak. Why was she so obsessed with how it felt?

"Oh, yes, I'm perfectly fine," Chastity said, glossing over her cognitive dissonance.

"I think I might just be tired, that's all. It's been a pretty intense day."

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

And so the excitement of a busy day was waning, and the thoughts of everything one had seen and heard was taking over. Connor folded his arms and rocked on his heels gently.

”Well. If you’re just tired, then I will leave you to sleep. Please, sleep here tonight. I will use my spare pillows for the floor and won’t hear anything else.”

Walking around the other side of the bunk, Connor crouched down and pulled out a pillow and rolled up duvet which was a spare, but now would come in handy. He tossed it to the foot of the bunk.

”Freshen up, please. There is privacy for you, and I’ve got bits to busy myself with here so don’t worry.”

Half calling her bluff, Connor felt there was more but wasn’t going to pry – it wasn’t his business, and it would be interesting to see how Chastity felt about being open with anything. Connor moved to the other side of the bunk and pulled the sliding door to his wardrobe where his armour hung along with other gear, and his lightsaber rested on a wooden shelf beside a holo-projector. Taking the projector and closing the door, he made his way to the adjoining table beside the circular window and perched on the seat.

”If you want a drink or anything, please do help yourself. I hope you’ve benefited from today, Chastity.”

[member="Chastity Lunelle"]

 

[Chastity Lunelle]

Chastity wanted to open up to Connor, but something was holding her back. She wasn’t used to expressing her thoughts to anyone. Even her sister did not know her innermost secrets. Overprotectiveness towards her sister was one of Seltzi’s more persistent traits, and Chastity had probably misinterpreted her well-intentioned lectures as overbearing. The reticence stuck, and where the young woman was bubbly and sociable in more superficial ways, her depth was protected by very thick walls.

The young Padawan had also never shared a room with anyone else beside her sister, so the prospect of spending the night with her Master hatched a garden of butterflies in her stomach. Oh grow up, Chast. How are you ever going to fight the Sith if the idea of having a man in your sleeping quarters scares you? It’s just the newness of the situation. There is nothing improper about it.

Suddenly she realized he was staring at her waiting for an answer.

“You have no idea how much I’ve benefited, Master Harrison.” she said, with an embarrassed smile. “I will freshen up in two shakes of a nerf’s tail and then I’ll be out of your hair.”

She made her way to his refresher and closed the door so she could wash up for the night.

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

With a nod of the head, Connor watched her go into the rear refresher and he turned to the table, activating the projector to pull up some Silver Jedi files. There was plenty of work to prepare for – the investigation into the death of Iella E’ron was soon to be discussed; training in the Academy had to be planned, and other basic bits regarding the repair of his E-wing. All usual admin.

Connor then banged his fist down on the table, rubbing the back of his neck and looking out the window as dusk approached. He rested his head in his hand in thought. What was he doing? Why was it now he was beginning to rid himself of the Dark Side lure, was his head and heart proving to be a problem.

Only recently the floodgates had opened for him to explore his emotions, and his head was all over the place. Now Chastity was showing him new light and life in the Order and benefiting from him; making him feel needed, important and someone to trust. And she was very pretty, there was no denying. Maybe he should have her stay with another so she felt comfortable – she wasn’t totally at ease, and that wasn’t fair at all.

Closing his eyes with a sigh, Connor had no allegiances to anyone – but of course one was always just too far from his sight, while another had introduced him to listen to his emotions and so was special to him also.

”Discipline, Harrison. Discipline.”

Pulling back, wiping his cheeks and tapping them gently, he stood and went to get a glass of water, watching it fall from the tap into the clear glass. Life was getting better, but so much more complicated. Maybe if he wasn’t so weak – inexperienced – it’d be easier.

[member="Chastity Lunelle"]

 

[Chastity Lunelle]

In the refresher, Chastity performed her usual nighttime ritual, brushing her hair and teeth and splashing water on her face. The cool water felt exquisite on her hot cheeks. Her fingers searched out the switch for the door, but stopped suddenly. Her slip dress wasn’t meant to be slept in, and she didn’t want to ruin it as it was one of her favorites. Although her family was by no means well-off, nice clothing was a weakness for her, and what little she had, she cherished. Taking a nervous moment to deliberate, she finally pulled the garment up over her head, and hung it on a rack in the refresher. Luckily, Master Harrison had big enough towels that covering her nudity wouldn’t be a problem.

Chastity emerged from the refresher with more than a touch of apprehension. Outside the windows, she could see the dusk creeping in over the planet, beginning to reveal a beautiful spray of stars and other celestial shapes. Connor seemed to be engrossed in his work, thankfully. Gripping her towel closely over her body, she padded to the bed quickly, climbing aboard as if it were a life raft. She climbed in, covered herself with the sheets, and then neatly folded the towel, placing it on the end of the bed. The Padawan sat upright, cross-legged, with the fresh white sheets covering her up to her cleavage.

“Feel free to go about whatever business you need to attend to, Master Harrison. I'm a heavy sleeper, so don't mind me at all."

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Staying focused on reading his own notes about Iella again, Connor refrained from looking up as Chastity came back, refreshed and ready for her rest. Dragging his fingers on the small pad beneath the display, the soft green illuminated his face with flashes of yellow.

Finally, he met her gaze as she spoke.

”I shan’t make any noise at all, Chastity. Just me and my thoughts. Please make yourself comfortable, and if I can do anything just ask.”

Standing up from the seat, he walked across the door and placed his hand over the silver control panel, looking up at the lights above the bunk in the room, which he dimmed to allow a soft orange and blue glow to shine down which was both comforting and relaxing.

”You’ll be asleep in minutes I assure you,” he smiled.

Returning to the table, he took a drink of water and sat back, toying with the pad and allowing her the quiet she wanted. He would take care of his own rest once he was happy she was relaxed and asleep.

[member="Chastity Lunelle"]

 

[Chastity Lunelle]

Chastity thought she would have trouble sleeping in a foreign bed, but as she lay down, her head sinking comfortably into Connor’s pillow, a dull fatigue consumed every muscle. The long day of traveling and touring finally caught up with her, and the quiet of the room, coupled with the soft lighting allowed her to drift into a pleasant sleep.

When Chastity woke, the waking light had just begun to creep over the planet’s horizon and inexorably push away the darkness. A farm girl at heart, she had never learned to cultivate the urge to sleep late. Unlike most girls her age, Chastity was one of those annoying morning people who was probably going to take over the galaxy while everyone else was still asleep. Stirring quietly with a stretch and a yawn, the young Padawan propped herself up on Connor’s pillows and simply meditated on the sliver of dawn’s light that crept along the floor. She tried to be as quiet as possible. It would be a shame if she accidentally woke her Master, especially since he let her have the comfortable bed for the night and took the floor instead.

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Dawn broke, and the light woke him gently. Connor was asleep on the floor, head on the pillow but still dressed. He had managed to tread quietly around the sleeping Chastity tucked up in bed and had had a glass of water before leaving her alone for a good half-hour.

He had taken the early morning rise, partly knowing he was not alone and partly not being in a bed, to have a morning jog around the Temple. Nothing strenuous, but enough to stretch tight muscles and breathe in the fresh morning air. Birds warbled overheard and the moons could be seen in the atmosphere above; a beautiful sight.

Connor made good time and once back in the Temple, took a few minutes to make his way back to his quarters and gently activated the door which opened smoothly. She was awake and still tucked up.

”Good morning,” he said quietly, coming into the quarters, ”did you sleep well? I hope my leaving didn’t disturb you? Just thought I’d have a little fresh air. Would you like some sweet bread and fruit jam? I don’t have much in food wise, but I have enough to get by.”

He walked past the bunk, kicking his pillow to the side and walking into the small kitchen space for another drink. He took a second glass for his guest – his Padawan, not a guest.

[member="Chastity Lunelle"]

 

[Chastity Lunelle]

Chastity gave Master Harrison a sleepy, but unguarded smile as entered his quarters. So he woke up even earlier than she. This bode well for their training didn’t it? She scooched up a bit taller where she sat, pulling the covers up around her, and running her fingers through her dark, tousled hair.

“I slept wonderfully,” she admitted. “A few strange dreams, but nothing that plagued my sleep.” Chastity often had recurring nightmares that she was back on the farm on Aduba III, and being chased through maze-stalks by a dark being whose face she could never catch a glimpse of. She was so used to them, they no longer caused her to wake up in a cold sweat. She wondered if the dreams were tied somehow to the Dark side of the Force, or if they were, in fact, just her unconscious cutting and pasting tangentially linked images together, like a surreal collage.

“Sweet bread and jam would be divine,” said the Padawan and then her brow furrowed. She felt like she was being a bad guest by doing nothing to help him. “I can fix it for us if you want. I don’t want you to feel like you need to wait on me.”

Long strands of hair fell over her face, as she quickly glanced down at her state of undress. Really, Chast? You’re going to serve him breakfast like this? She gathered up the covers a bit tighter to her lithe frame and felt that blush blooming up her cheeks again.

"I mean, I'll have to get dressed first, of course..."

Here she trailed off with a nervous laugh. Awkward.

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Chuckling to himself, Connor turned his head slightly.

”I’m not waiting on you – I’m looking after a guest to the Silver Jedi and future Padawan of the Order. And, you ARE technically a guest here in my quarters so I’ll hear none of it.”

He started to work on slicing up some of the thick bread, soft enough to eat alone with a sweet coating, and then to the pots of jam in the small cupboard. Red, green and yellow. He hadn’t labelled them as he picked the fruit from the garden the other day – red was apple, he knew that much. He forgot the rest.

”Please feel free to use the fresher to get dressed, I’ll sort the bunk and get breakfast up. Sit down, relax, have a drink and some food and then, I guess we can start your journey as a Jedi if you’re ready?”

As much as he wanted to turn around with the breads to serve up on the table, he would wait for her to slink into the fresher. He knew the answer about her training; her enthusiasm was evident and her heart was pure, but there was still conflict in her that he felt when certain words were said. He’d address them in time, hopefully to help her worries or nerves.

[member="Chastity Lunelle"]

 

[Chastity Lunelle]

Chastity gathered up all the sheets around her as best she could, making a somewhat ridiculous cover dress out of them. Once she felt like it wasn’t going to slip or cause her to stumble on it, she padded to the refresher, grabbing her training clothes on the way. She quickly dressed in her training clothing and threw her robes on top of it. She figured she could shower later, after her lessons. The reflection that stared back at her from the mirror in his refresher, stunned her. She almost didn’t recognize the dark-tressed Jedi Padawan with blue grey eyes gazing back, ready to take up the banner of the Light.

Emerging from the bathroom, Chastity first took the sheets back to the bed and made it up as quickly as she could. She and Setzi might have gotten their hands dirty on the farm, but both the girls raised with excellent manners. Soon, she made her way to Master Harrison’s kitchen, and sat down at the small table there to join him for bread and jam.

“What will my lesson be today, Master?”

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Connor lifted the plates and span around, nearly bumping into Chastity, a little laugh escaped his lips as he moved around her to the table.

”Now this isn't exciting, but it's your sugars and fruits for energy. Water for hydration and later we'll eat proper. I don't each much in here,” he placed the plates down and sat, ”in fact this could be the longest I've been here in years.”

Connor informed her what she was eating and the various flavours, before starting on her answer.

”Well first thing I need to know, is what do you know of the Force. Do you understand what it is, and how important it is for not just the Jedi, but for life itself?”

He took some bread, tore of a chunk and dipped it in the green jam.

[member="Chastity Lunelle"]

 

[Chastity Lunelle]

Chastity put a modest amount of bread and jam on her plate. She wasn’t as hungry as she thought she would be. The newness of the situation still caused an erratically loud thumping of her heart in her chest. She supposed she would soon settle down and get used to everything. The Jedi Temple, the handsome man, lightsaber training, all of it, but right now she felt, well, every emotion in the book. C’mon you silly girl, get yourself together and make some conversation.

“If you’re not here, Master Harrison. Where are you usually?” she asked. “Besides saving the galaxy from the Sith.” She gave him a playful wink as she spread a thin layer of jam on her bread.

When he asked her what she knew of the Force, she answered candidly.

“I really have only rudimentary knowledge of the Force, Master. According to my studies in boarding school, the Force is an energy field that is created by all living beings, and some beings, called Force sensitives, can connect to it, and can use it to help them wield great power.”

She wasn’t touching her food yet.

[member="Connor Harrison"]