I mean it! I know you went through my last one. You aren't here right now, of course. You're back home with mom and dad. Still, that doesn't mean you won't get your sneaky little hands on it when I come back to visit. So, take this as my warning. I'm much bigger than you and Graxin's going to make me even stronger. You do not want to tick me off, got it? Stop. Reading. Now.
That goes for you too, Graxin. I shouldn't even have to warn you.
...Alright. Now that I've got that out of the way, this is my first day away from home. I've never felt such excitement in my life. Can you believe that just a year ago I was taking dancing lessons with a private tutor? And now, here I am ready to train with my big brother! It's all very exciting.
And a little bit scary. And a little bit lonely.
He told me I'd have to leave my friends behind. I don't miss most of it, to be honest. I mean, it's only been a day. How can I? Still, I didn't expect myself to already feel homesick. And the strange thing is, it's not really Naboo I'm missing. I miss my mom and my dad. I miss Glyph too, even though he's an idiot. I really miss Owain (don't ever let him know I said that). I can't believe I'm saying it, but I actually miss my school mates too at the Academy. I even miss that uncomfortable uniform they made us wear. And Celeste, if you're still reading this, I even miss you too. You'd love it here.
Graxin is taking me on his ship. An actual ship. Not a luxury yacht. I've only been on a real ship once before. This is a real treat. He's taking me to some temple. To be honest, I was feeling so nervous when we left, I didn't really pay attention to what planet it was going to. I only cried a little, and never in front of Graxin. I'm supposed to be tough now.
Mom didn't cry when she kissed me goodbye. I don't think Queens are allowed to cry, but I think she wanted to. I don't know if she's proud of me, or ashamed. Is it possible for her to be both at the same time? I hid fathers lightsaber from her when we said our goodbyes. I know she would not approve of that, certainly. Daddy is happy for me, or at least he's trying to be. I think he's worried. First chance I get, I'm going to write to him. And mom. I'll even write to you too, Celeste, if you're being naughty and still reading this. Owain too, just to say hello.
In other news, the flickers haven't gone away. I had another episode last night, just before we left. It wasn't a very clear picture. Could hardly see what it was. Mom says that they're visions. She used to have them too. She says that if I want to, I can learn to see clearly, or if I preferred, block them out entirely like she did. She said they were nothing but trouble. But I think I disagree with her. These stupid, irritating, distracting flickers or 'visions', have been nothing but useful. Even if I can't manipulate the Force to save my own life, I can at least save other people with these stupid pictures. They've been such useful warnings.
When I come home again, I hope I can live up to expectations at last.For once, do something right with myself. It would be good to see a little change in my stagnant life. I just hope I don't change too much. For Owains sake.
I did make a promise, after all, to always be simply Felicity.
That goes for you too, Graxin. I shouldn't even have to warn you.
...Alright. Now that I've got that out of the way, this is my first day away from home. I've never felt such excitement in my life. Can you believe that just a year ago I was taking dancing lessons with a private tutor? And now, here I am ready to train with my big brother! It's all very exciting.
And a little bit scary. And a little bit lonely.
He told me I'd have to leave my friends behind. I don't miss most of it, to be honest. I mean, it's only been a day. How can I? Still, I didn't expect myself to already feel homesick. And the strange thing is, it's not really Naboo I'm missing. I miss my mom and my dad. I miss Glyph too, even though he's an idiot. I really miss Owain (don't ever let him know I said that). I can't believe I'm saying it, but I actually miss my school mates too at the Academy. I even miss that uncomfortable uniform they made us wear. And Celeste, if you're still reading this, I even miss you too. You'd love it here.
Graxin is taking me on his ship. An actual ship. Not a luxury yacht. I've only been on a real ship once before. This is a real treat. He's taking me to some temple. To be honest, I was feeling so nervous when we left, I didn't really pay attention to what planet it was going to. I only cried a little, and never in front of Graxin. I'm supposed to be tough now.
Mom didn't cry when she kissed me goodbye. I don't think Queens are allowed to cry, but I think she wanted to. I don't know if she's proud of me, or ashamed. Is it possible for her to be both at the same time? I hid fathers lightsaber from her when we said our goodbyes. I know she would not approve of that, certainly. Daddy is happy for me, or at least he's trying to be. I think he's worried. First chance I get, I'm going to write to him. And mom. I'll even write to you too, Celeste, if you're being naughty and still reading this. Owain too, just to say hello.
In other news, the flickers haven't gone away. I had another episode last night, just before we left. It wasn't a very clear picture. Could hardly see what it was. Mom says that they're visions. She used to have them too. She says that if I want to, I can learn to see clearly, or if I preferred, block them out entirely like she did. She said they were nothing but trouble. But I think I disagree with her. These stupid, irritating, distracting flickers or 'visions', have been nothing but useful. Even if I can't manipulate the Force to save my own life, I can at least save other people with these stupid pictures. They've been such useful warnings.
When I come home again, I hope I can live up to expectations at last.For once, do something right with myself. It would be good to see a little change in my stagnant life. I just hope I don't change too much. For Owains sake.
I did make a promise, after all, to always be simply Felicity.
