Private Yatra

[Jack Sandrow]

Est. 850 ABY - 50 years ago
Location: Endor

Jak sat alone in the cockpit of his freshly-purchased ship. Unfamiliar controls were quickly assumed, and the small ship pulled away from the atmosphere, with Jak leaning back in his seat once he was in hyperspace. It was all gone, now. Every last trace of his life. He had to hope that he had made the right decision. Well, it was either the last bad decision he'd ever make, or the first good decision he'd ever make.

He closed his eyes, the auto-pilot making its slow way into orbit. How had it come to this?

JSA was liquidated, for what scant credits it was worth. All his work, made essentially into little more than compost. His fighter sold for scrap metal. All ideas, tooled or blueprinted, all at the bottom of a trash heap. For his own safety, he had to remind himself. For his safety, for the safety of his friends, for the safety of those he cared about. He wiped at his face, unable to stop the tears. So human, even after all this. Josh. Leyan. ...yeah, even Circe a little bit. For his own safety, he had to keep repeating. For their safety. Everything had to be burned. This was a firebreak. Didn't make any of this any easier, though.

He tapped a few buttons on the control stick. "For my own sake, I'm making this recording. Archived to be accessed only after 20 years. My name is Jak Sandrow. I'm a 24-year-old male-turned-Vinithi, Force sensitive. During my time in the Mid and Inner Rim, I got myself into trouble - significant and potent financial trouble. To prevent my friends from taking the punishment for my mistakes, I am distancing myself from them, from the galaxy at large, and from the world I knew. If I ever return, it's to start all over again. And do it right." A few more clicks on the dashboard, and he sighed. "I won't be naming my friends here, again, for their safety and mine. You know who you are, if you're listening to this. I'm sorr-"

He hiccupped, catching his breath as the tears began to pour freely. "I'm... sorry..." He paused the recording, giving himself a few moments to compose himself, before scrubbing the last few seconds. "I'm sorry for leaving without notice. I'm sorry I was a terrible friend. You deserved better than I gave, and I wasn't grateful for the good you gave me. I wish I could say thank you, and accept your help with this... but I know if I keep leaning on you for help, I won't be able to help myself. I have to step away, for my own benefit."

A sniff managed to escape, and he scrubbed back a second or two. "I have to work on myself. At some point, fixing myself has to start with myself." A soft sigh. "So... I've turned to the Force. The Force brought me to where I am now, so I am going to start to trust it. I genuinely don't know what's going to happen to me. I wish I could tell you, so you might find this. I hope you do. I don't think you will."

A long, shaky breath.

The hyperdrive smoothly activated, and Jak sighed as the Force presence of Endor faded away into the big blue yonder. "So... what will happen to me? I don't know. Maybe I'll figure out who I am. Maybe I'll live with it, maybe I won't. Maybe I can understand the Force better after all this. Maybe I can figure out what I want for myself. I don't know. I don't..."

He hiccupped again. "Sorry. I'll try again tomorrow."

And the recording clicked off.

Jak let out a long, shaky breath, trying to stabilize. "Easy.... easy. You are Jak. You are Jak Sandrow."

You are Jak.

...

But am I?

 

[Jack Sandrow]

Bᴇɢɪɴ ᴀʀᴄʜɪᴠᴇ ʀᴇᴛʀɪᴇᴠᴀʟ
Eʀʀᴏʀ. Dᴀᴛᴀ ᴄᴏʀʀᴜᴘᴛɪᴏɴ.
Bᴇɢɪɴɴɪɴɢ ᴅᴀᴛᴀ ʀᴇsᴛᴏʀᴀᴛɪᴏɴ
........................................0.004%
........................................1.572%
......................................12.073%
......................................33.371%
......................................67.220%
......................................83.159%
......................................98.269%
......................................99.267%
......................................99.999%
Eʀʀᴏʀ. Pᴀʀᴛɪᴀʟ ᴅᴀᴛᴀ ʀᴇsᴛᴏʀᴀᴛɪᴏɴ. Cᴏʀʀᴜᴘᴛᴇᴅ ᴅᴀᴛᴀ ʟᴏsᴛ. Cᴏɴғɪʀᴍ?
...
...
...
Tɪᴍᴇᴏᴜᴛ ᴀᴜᴛᴏ-ᴄᴏɴғɪʀᴍ.
...........................................100%

Bᴇɢɪɴ ᴘʟᴀʏʙᴀᴄᴋ, ʟᴏɢ #000-003. Vɪᴅᴇᴏ ᴄᴏʀʀᴜᴘᴛᴇᴅ, ᴀᴜᴅɪᴏ ᴏɴʟʏ.

"Day 2. Been hopping from planet to planet, trying to find... something. Every time I feel like I've been drawing closer, the feeling fades away. I don't even know what I'm chasing. Legends? Stories?"

The sound of a muffled shift in the seat. "...nh. Normally I have an objective... or a plan in mind. I've never done anything just hoping for the best. This whole 'trusting the Force' business is... entirely foreign to me. For the record, I've never actually had any formal Jedi training, just from what I've seen with -" The audio cuts briefly, before resuming, "from what I've seen with my friends. Just the basics, just the simple Push, Pull, Jump, et cetera..." A loud sigh. "I'm grateful for the help, don't get me wrong, but anything past that? I've had to work for. I don't want it to come easy, but any kind of help was appreciated."

A long sigh. "...I don't have anything else to add to this." A click.

 

[Jack Sandrow]

Eʀʀᴏʀ. Fɪʟᴇ ᴄᴏʀʀᴜᴘᴛᴇᴅ.
Eʀʀᴏʀ. Fɪʟᴇ ᴄᴏʀʀᴜᴘᴛᴇᴅ.
Eʀʀᴏʀ. Fɪʟᴇ ᴄᴏʀʀᴜᴘᴛᴇᴅ.
Eʀʀᴏʀ. Fɪʟᴇ ᴄᴏʀʀᴜᴘᴛᴇᴅ.
Fɪʟᴇ ʟᴏᴀᴅᴇᴅ. Vɪᴅᴇᴏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴀᴜᴅɪᴏ ᴀᴠᴀɪʟᴀʙʟᴇ.
Bᴇɢɪɴ ᴘʟᴀʏʙᴀᴄᴋ.

"Day... seven." Jak scratched at his cheek, blowing out a raspberry. "Just out of Yavin." The blue of hyperspace tinted the cockpit around him, and the dark circles under his eyes hinted at a long trip behind and before him. "This is a wild bantha chase, I swear. I'm being led in circles across the galaxy - and I need sleep. I need to rest."

A moment, as he looked out the window at the blue nothingness. "I wish I could just stop for a day. But every time I stop, it feels like it pulls at me even more."

A few minutes, before he rubbed his face again. "I can hardly rest in hyperspace, either. Force basically doesn't exist here, and I need that connection... I've been noticing that even more these days, I'm connected to the Force in ways I've never seen in writing before. It might be my physiology, or it might be how I was first connected to the Force... cause I wasn't a Forcer before... before the transformation.

"This transformation, specifically." He held up a hand, letting a flower grow from his palm. "From human to Vinithi. I never exhibited any Force potential - we checked. My dad and I, that is."

He shakes his head, rubbing his eyes again. "Alright, I'm going to try to rest my eyes. Next log should be outside Endor, or thereabouts."

 

[Jack Sandrow]

Fɪʟᴇ ʟᴏᴀᴅᴇᴅ. Vɪᴅᴇᴏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴀᴜᴅɪᴏ ᴀᴠᴀɪʟᴀʙʟᴇ.
Bᴇɢɪɴ ᴘʟᴀʏʙᴀᴄᴋ.

"Day eight. Coming into the Endor system in a few minutes. I'll update when I get back."

He reached for the console. A jump cut, as Jak now clambered back into the cockpit. The sky outside was a rich blue cluttered with trees, and Jak took a moment to breathe in the fresh air, before sealing up. "Still on day eight." The ship began to take off, as he continued, "Endor didn't prove fruitful. The Force presence, whatever it is, feels stronger than ever, but still distant. For some reason I keep thinking it's been leading me around. I get closer, and it gets farther away." He shook his head. "I'm gonna try to see if I can locate something in regards to Force presences shuffling around the galaxy. Maybe I can find something back around on Bespin."

Jak eyed the camera, sighing gently. "This feels like a fool's errand, to be honest. And now I need closure. So... yeah, I guess I'll keep this going."

 

[Jack Sandrow]

Fɪʟᴇ ʟᴏᴀᴅᴇᴅ. Vɪᴅᴇᴏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴀᴜᴅɪᴏ ᴀᴠᴀɪʟᴀʙʟᴇ.
Bᴇɢɪɴ ᴘʟᴀʏʙᴀᴄᴋ.

"Day nine." This was a different perspective - a wrist-mounted device that captured Jak's immediate surroundings and little else. "This is Bespin City. Bustling mining colony-turned-frontier city. Lots of Outer Rim trade here, and the mining means that the place can always be profitable. Tibanna gas goes a long way in a galaxy at war."

He swerved around a couple of Ugnaughts, murmuring a brief " 'scuse me" as he continued onwards. "And then of course, there's the giant casino and resort. Now I'm not here to make some money - though I totally could - I'm here to bump elbows and learn a thing or two about Force stuff. And... well, I guess, maybe make some money to blend in. Last thing I need is to stand out."

There was a brief cut. "Well that didn't last!!" Jak was hurrying down a corridor, looking a little worse for wear. "Apparently they don't like a little playful card shuffling here!" Distant yelling could be heard over the feed, though nothing distinguishable. "I did not cheat, for the record! I played fair and square, they just don't like card flourishes!"

A loud groan briefly spiked the audio, before he smacked his forehead. "And of course it had to be before I got any actionable intel. Well, time to try to follow my instincts. And the Force." A few stun rounds zipped by, and he ducked back behind the corner. "And try to get off this place in one piece. I'll update when I'm off this rock. Er... gas ball."

 

[Jack Sandrow]

Fɪʟᴇ ʟᴏᴀᴅᴇᴅ. Vɪᴅᴇᴏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴀᴜᴅɪᴏ ᴀᴠᴀɪʟᴀʙʟᴇ.
Aᴛᴛᴇɴᴛɪᴏɴ: Mᴜʟᴛɪᴘʟᴇ ɢᴀᴘs ɪɴ ᴠɪᴅᴇᴏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴀᴜᴅɪᴏ ʀᴇᴄᴏʀᴅɪɴɢ.
Bᴇɢɪɴ ᴘʟᴀʏʙᴀᴄᴋ.

The blue of hyperspace once again tinted the recording. Jak was munching on some rations, before reaching out suddenly. "Day ten. Sorry about that, I was eating." He sat back, thinking a long moment. There was a brief cut, before he spoke. "I guess I should probably explain where this all started. For the record, anyway."

A palm to his forehead. "It... a few weeks ago I began to feel a presence in the Force. A shadow, gently tugging at the back of my mind. I don't have any other way to explain it, it was a presence I didn't fully comprehend. I still don't. When I realized that my efforts to gain quick profits had only brought danger on my friends and family, it was like a shot to the heart. Suddenly I realized that the Force itself, or some avatar of the Force, was calling me. That is what it felt like. Based on what - admittedly little - data I've been able to recover regarding Force presences calling to those imbued with the Force, I feel I have to answer this."

He shook his head, looking off into the endless blue of the void. His finger trailed along the window, and he hissed a soft breath. "It's a rumor. But i feel that it might very well be -"

[Rᴇᴅᴀᴄᴛᴇᴅ]

"- back from the -"

[Rᴇᴅᴀᴄᴛᴇᴅ]

"No proof, of course. I had my doubts I'd actually find anything substantial... and I've yet to actually find anything. This is a hunch. This is faith of the most critical sort."

He eyed the camera, letting out another sigh. "I really hope I'm worthy of this."

A moment longer, before the video cut briefly again. "I want to make amends for what I did wrong. I want to restart, and I hope I'll be able to. This.... well, I hope this is what will assist me. But I don't know."

"This is Jak, signing off for now." And he reached forward to turn off the camera.

 

[Jack Sandrow]

Jak sat back, taking a look at the blue of hyperspace once again. Where was he even going? What was he even chasing?

The Force niggled at his mind. It was the worst kind of infuriating. When he tried to focus on it, it would disappear, and as soon as he forgot about it, or stopped focusing on it, it came right back. And then as soon as he tried to understand its direction, it would jump away from his perception. If he didn't know any better, he'd say that this presence was toying with him.

He checked the status of the ship for the umpteenth time. Only so much fuel, only so many days of flight left. Well, that was using human calculations. He smiled, just a little. "Alright... I'm gonna settle in for the long haul then, I guess."

Touching a few programs, he brought up a star chart. Brute forcing it might be the only way to do it, unfortunately. He plotted a rather excessive and thorough course between the systems, circling around what he vaguely estimated as the center of the system.

He hit the record button again. "This is Jak Sandrow. Should this be my last surviving recording in the event of my death, please consider this my last will and testament. All of my belongings are to be burned and destroyed. Any surviving financial status I have, I wish to dissolve and donate to charities - I don't know what will be active if or when this recording is found, so please donate to charities that support ecological repair and environmental stability." A moment, before continuing, "Should any of my remains be discovered, I want to be buried on Yavin 4; it holds special meaning for me." He sat back a moment and sighed. "I don't know what goes in a will... I dunno. Just... tie up any loose ends and let me be buried in history. That's it." He clicked off again, and committed the hard drive to long-term storage.

"Right. Now... to wait." He adjusted in his seat, pulling his legs up and wrapping his arms around himself to curl into a fetal position. Bark began to flutter out over his skin, as he slowly began to cocoon himself. The ship began to power down, still pushing through hyperspace, but coasting instead of racing. "I wish I knew how long this would be..." He closed his eyes, the shell of bark and fibres encasing him completely. The Force continued to gently egg him on, and he sighed, shivering a bit as the cockpit grew cold around him. Should he feel something significant, he would awaken... and if not... Well, a death in space was his second choice, after Yavin. To exist among the stars was nigh unthinkable for a plant. To die among them would be even greater an achievement.

As his body began to enter a state of hibernation, he felt senses drifting away... felt his awareness of the ship disappear... felt the Force fade to nothingness... almost nothingness.

It pulled at him.

It drew at him.

Time slipped away.

Time meant nothing.

The Force was all that he could follow now. So to the Force, he began to attune himself.

This would be his pilgrimage to make. And his alone.




END