This Is Who I Am

[Arekk]

NAR SHADDAA​

Sky Palace Complex, Apartment 115​

​

Just an hour ago, Jyn and Ar'ekk lived the most taxing day of their lives after she decided to come back and rescue the young warrior from a path difficult to stay away from. A luxurious life without measuring the consequences it carried out, become someone you were never meant to be. Despite everything that went through his head, she managed to put some good sense into his thoughts and convinced him to not throw away all the things achieved so far. Life had gotten difficult, that's true, but giving up wasn't an option he was willing to take due to his own nature.

The plan was to return to Aurum, home of the Jed'aii Order, when they had the energy to do so which wasn't the case this tiring night. That's why Ar'ekk brought Jyn to the commodity of his own apartment in the Sky Palace Complex of Nar Shaddaa where he lived for the past year, one of the perks of being an influential person in the Smuggler's Moon. His bed was big enough to have a good night's rest and the flashing neon lights coming from the advertisements outside went through the blinds straight to the interior of his bedroom, reflecting upon his face when he slept.

It's been weeks since had a good night's rest as he wasn't unable to entirely take a break of the criminal life. This had gotten him pretty stressed and his "normal" life was pretty much non-existant, spending most of his days at The Hawk's Den overseeing the everyday functioning of his principal business and most important place of income. However, Ar'ekk managed to close his eyes after a long time and slept despite doing so in his couch due to obvious reasons. His mask rested on the small table next to the sofa.

The morning would be a very different one for both. A bright, sunny day that promised much more positiveness.

Things were finally changing for good.

[member="Jyn Sol"]

 

[Lief]

Fatigue had taken her some time ago.

In his office, back at the Casino, she had fallen asleep within his armchair in the minutes after his departure, and nothing between then and now had awoken her. Not the way he lifted her ever so gently into his arms, or carried her through the noisy premises, or strapped her into a speeder car. Nothing.

So it was that when she did awaken she was somewhat... confused. A very comfortable and spacious bed lay beneath her, soft sheets and a pillow which fit her head just right embraced her, and lights danced over her eyelids before she opened them. Her toes wriggled somewhat, enjoying this brief moment while it lasted.

She turned her head, glancing toward the large floor to ceiling window with a stunning view of the world beyond. Surprisingly, despite all the general hubbub, she did not hear any noise.

Her mind raced back to all that had happened since she stepped for on Nar Shaddaa that morning. For half a second she sat bolt upright in panic, where was Ar'ekk? Was everything okay? A slow exhale of breath quelled her concerns, as she sensed another not too far away, peacefully at rest. Was this his home?

Was she lying in his bed?

Slipping out of the blankets she realized she had kicked off her trousers in the night, and now the somewhat chill of the apartment struck her. There was a thin blanket draped over the bottom of the bed, and so she took it up and wrapped it around herself as she took careful steps from the room. Several doors, yet only one went to the direction of Ar'ekk, she could sense him.

The room beyond was also set into a half state of darkness and brilliant lights, another tall window affording her further views of the cityscape. But for all its beauty, her attention drifted from it to the man on the sofa. Indignation rose within her then, he should have been the one in the bed, she the one on the sofa. This was his home, after all.

It wasn't worth waking him up over, though. Instead she walked around to the front of the sofa, and sat on the ground beside him; her back was to him, eyes fixed on the window, yet just being in his presence again was enough to soothe her. She brought her knees up to her chest, settled her chin atop them, and exhaled a soft breath.

It was so quiet.

So peaceful.

So unexpected after the afternoon they'd shared.

@Ar'ekk

 

[Arekk]

Earlier that day, things had gotten slighty stressful for both of them and that drained a huge amount of energy from them. Ar'ekk had been stressed for some weeks now trying to deal with multiple situations within the organization that required his complete attention yet didn't feel like dealing with at all. A constant buzzing sound invaded his mind and became the heaviest of migrains, this evening everything seemed to make everything fade away as he closed his eyes for a good night's sleep.

Sleeping on his sofa wasn't something he rejected as he usually arrived home pretty late and the couch had become his best friend after long nights at The Hawk's Den or somewhere else. Jyn would feel comfortable sleeping in his own bed and he wouldn't let her sleep in the living room, not at all.

Through the deepest ways of the Force, Ar'ekk could feel her approaching as he continued to sleep in the couch. He slept shirtless and no blanket sheltered him from the cold although the temperature inside his apartment was warm enough to keep everyone comfortable. Once she sat down near the sofa with a thin blanket around her shoulders, he acknowledged Jyn's presence with a hushed tone.

"I thought you were sleeping."

The living room was in utter darkness yet the flashing lights outside ignited up the interior for brief seconds before turning off and on continously. You'd expect Nar Shaddaa to be loud and obnoxious but considering the apartment was high up in the sky and its sorrounding area belonged to the filthy rich scum of the Smuggler's Moon you'd expect to have a pleasant good night's rest for all the money spent on a luxurious place like this.

Ar'ekk couldn't help but give Jyn the warmest of smiles despite her having her back turned against him. A pillow accomodated undernearth his head allowed him to rest easily and avoid any unpleasant pains on his neck. It was a pleasant sight to have her around, he had made the right choice that night.

It was worth sacrificing everything.

[member="Jyn Sol"]

 

[Lief]

A soft voice broke her thoughts before they could truly come to life within her mind.

She smiled, remaining as she was for a moment without responding, her eyes taking in all there was to see beyond the window, the occasional sky speeder drifted by at their level, too far for her tell what the inhabitants within looked like, though their emotions were all over the place. Euphoric. Someone was having a good evening, then again Nar Shaddaa was a place which never slept.

Jyn would cherish this moment with her friend.

Slowly but surely she turned her head, glancing back at him with a content expression.

"I was worried you had slipped away again," she breathed, "I had to check, and then I saw you so peaceful and..." One light shrug, before she took notice of him properly, the fact he hadn't any shirt or blanket in sight. That made her feel bad, though she knew the room wasn't particularly cold. She struggled to sleep without something covering her, even if it was as thin as the blanket draped around her.

Without much thought she removed it, to lay it over him, turning her body to face him and forsaking the beautiful night view.

"You could have slept in the bed, you know?" she finally said, ignoring the tiny shiver which traveled down her spine at the exposure of her legs, they'd adjust to the temperature soon enough, "This is your home."

Settling her head against the bottom cushion of the sofa, she half turned to view the night while also keeping him in her peripheral. She was so happy that he was there, that he hadn't dropped her off and fled, or worse.

"I've missed you," she whispered, so quiet that he might not have heard it at all if not for the pin drop silence in the room.

[member='Ar'ekk']

 

[Arekk]

He smiled, rejecting the blanket as Jyn offered to him to snuggle with because he liked to sleep like that. Ar'ekk pulled himself up from the sofa and sat right next to her friend and putting both his arms on top of his knees to appreciate the flickering yet marvelous skyline that the Smuggler's Moon had to offer for both. The blanket, however, was used to cover them both in the dark as they sat together on the carpeted floor.

"I wouldn't slip away from you, specially not now.", he countered back, "You'd come to get me right away." A slick smirk broadened upon his face which he quickly realized stopped doing long ago. Everything was frowns and death stares so you wouldn't reveal your true emotions to enemies you'd encounter out there. Shielding your feelings and keeping them away from business was a key thing to keep in mind on this life.

"I know I could have. But out of respect for you, I decided to sleep here. You were pretty tired and I didn't want to interrupt you." He shivered as well due to his obvious lack of clothing for his torso but the temperature would adapt quickly for their own comfort. The night was bright and beautiful, countless of things to pick out from in the horizon such as flying speeders and the iconic advertisements from different outlets and venues around the city.

His reply was heartfelt and sincere, just like he had always been with Jyn. "I missed you too. You don't know how lucky I am to have you."

Ar'ekk took a moment before continuing,

"That you came here and decided to sacrifice everything for me. I don't know how I will repay you."

Their glances clashed in that instant and time seemed to have stopped for both.

[member="Jyn Sol"]

 

[Lief]

She was about to frown, to force the blanket on him when he rejected it, only to find him slip from the sofa to sit by her side. The blanket proved to be enough to cover the both of them, and without much thought, as they both glanced to the shifting scene beyond the window, at the dancing lights and general life of Nar Shaddaa, her head moved to settle against his arm.

There was nothing that needed to be said, not really, she was comfortable in his presence, and did not have the urge to break it with needless conversation. Still, when he replied to her she felt a smile pull at her lips, this conversation, at least, was not needless, it was not empty.

"You bet I'd get you" she whispered, "You'd get less of the friendly treatment too..." A grin replaced the smile for a fraction of a second, before she shook her head at what was said next. "You're silly, do you know that? I appreciate being given the comfort, but I'm not going to kick you out of your own bed again, understood?"

She felt him shivering, and instinctively pulled the blanket up a little higher to cover his torso. Her feet were uncovered in the process, so she shifted them back ever so slightly with a gentle smile. Content, yes.... Content indeed.

For a little while they simply watched the night unfold. Jyn shifted into a more comfortable position, still with her head lightly on his arm, and enjoyed the silence between them. The lights, she had found, were not as distracting as she had expected them to be. In many way they were soothing, steady, repetitive. One constant in what had otherwise been a rather tremulous day.

Her head lifted enough to look at him as he spoke, eyes locking in that instance. "I will always find you," she told him, "I will never let you walk alone, especially not through darkness and hardship. I promise you that much, Querido."

[member='Ar'ekk']

 

[Arekk]

He appreciated everything that Jyn had done for him and acknowledged her sincere words with a warm smile that could heaten up your entire body in just a fraction of a second.

The setting could've been called perfection that night as they cuddled within a very thin blanket and watched through the blinds a majestic display of lights and colours thanks to what the Smuggler's Moon had to offer. It was a city that never slept yet above a hundred floors everything was silent. Peaceful.

His eyes sparked and met with hers right away before talking. "I'd never let you go, know that. Whatever it takes, I will sacrifice myself for you always." He told her, lifting up his head and returning another smile.

Ar'ekk wrapped his arm around Jyn's shoulders and tugged her in, no need to put in another word to the conversation. A quiet yet peaceful silence inside the cozy apartment was everything they needed in that moment. They had finally obtained some rest for their very hectic and energetic lives.

"Also, I kinda like sleeping in the couch. You get to see everything from here." He finally joked as he referenced her earlier mention of not sleeping on his bed that night, a characteristic of his that seemed to have been lost in time but was back now.

Was there anything more perfect than this moment? Maybe time would tell.

Just maybe.

[member="Jyn Sol"]

 

[Lief]

His arm had moved around her shoulder, pulling her in closer than she had already been, and so with a very content sigh she brought her head down against his chest and looked from him back toward the windows. Even with the half-closed blinds the view was breathtaking, and with present company she could not help but smile.

"You could make your bed face the bedroom window" she offered with a cheeky tone of voice, peeking up at him with humour in her eyes, but she understood what he meant... The view from these dramatic floor-to-ceiling windows was intense, there was much more happening on this side of the apartment.

She leaned up for a moment, gently settling her lips to his cheek, before letting out another sigh and seeking out his gaze.

"Next time... Talk to me. I'm always just a holocall away, Querido. You never have to face anything alone."

@Ar'ekk

 

[Arekk]

The embrace was tight and full of warmth and he felt in paradise, even for just a few minutes. His heart was beating at a steady peace and she would be able to hear it when pressing her head against his chest, the blinds offering a piece of Nar Shaddaa's bright lights and its iconic panorama for them to see even at a half-closed sight.

"I know. It's just... things got out of control and I had to do whatever it took to survive. But now? It doesn't matter. I have you and that's all I care about right now." He said in a hushed tone, gently pressing his lips against her forehead and moving away a strand of hair that had gotten in the way.

Ar'ekk just couldn't help but stare into Jyn's beautiful light blue eyes as he sunk in a captivating feeling through and through, his hand going up to her soft jaw and lifting it up slowly. He wanted to kiss Jyn right there and let emotions just flow freely through the air.

The color of his iris had returned to what it used to be before everything went wrong, it was him once again and only she was able to bring him from certain doom. Jyn was his soul and meaning of life.

He just stared into her eyes and waited for the right moment, if there was any...

[member="Jyn Sol"]

 

[Lief]

His words, added to the touch of his lips against her forehead, made her spirit soar and her heart lighten. She could sense it, the change which had come over him since earlier in that day, the man she was sat beside was the man she had met on Coruscant all those years ago, it was Ar'ekk through and through, not the shadow of a man he had become.

She could feel tears beading at the corners of her eyes, stinging even, but did her best to ignore them. Instead she found her chin tipped up, her sapphire gaze meeting with his which no longer held their corruption, stray hair brushed out of her face.

There lay an intensity in the air, unseen sparks between them, in the moments which followed. Lights continued to flash in her peripheral, yet all became dull and uninteresting, unable to hold her attention for even a moment, and she could feel her heart hammering against her chest. She could feel his too, one hand settling softly over his heart.

Nothing had to be said, even if she hadn't been an Empath Jyn could swear she'd have still felt his intent, his hesitation. Her free hand shifted, lifting up to settle against his cheek, and she leaned in to press her forehead against his. And then, ever so slowly, giving him time to stop her if he wanted, she brought her lips to his.

It wasn't an act of impulse, though it easily could have been seen as such, far from it. Emotions had been running high throughout the day, from one extreme to another, and yet even so, even knowing that and setting it aside in her mind, this was still something she had wanted. Was it the same for him? She couldn't tell.

All she knew was that, at least in that moment, they were good for one another. Balanced each other out.

[member='Ar'ekk']

 

[Arekk]

This is what reaching paradise felt for the young warrior, nothing could ever match whatever feelings were flowing through him and that invaded his mind entirely with nothing but happiness. Sorrow, sadness and pain seemed to fade away instantly during that heartfelt kiss between the two of them.

Perfection.

Ar'ekk returned the gesture with a small peck to her lips and nose in a playful manner, that's what he wanted. The gently pressing of their lips finished with a dorky smile from both, eyes closed and their hearts almost in a consummate synchronization.

The taxing journey both had gone through so far had finally taken its toll and they seemed to slowly fade away into a sleeping state, clearly tired. Not for anything, they awokened during midnight and the lights shun even more through the blinds that somewhat turned everything slightly more annoying to their eyes.

"You know I can move the bed around, right?" Ar'ekk said in jest, clearly referring to Jyn's early mention of moving his comfortable bed towards the window so they could admire horizon from there. If the view from the living room left Jyn in awe, then the bedroom at morning would be a beautiful surprise.

"We should take an extra day off. We're in the richest part of town and there's nothing to worry about. Might as well check out the bazaars." It wasn't an entirely bad suggestion, considering they weren't in any rush whatsoever to get back to Aurum.

The night was young and that was totally true yet it was better if they managed to get some sleep.

However, there was nothing that could ever match this because they were good for one another. They balanced each other out perfectly, a harmonious definition of things.

Love. True feelings.

Perfection.

[member="Jyn Sol"]

 

[Lief]

It did not last long, it did not linger, neither pushed or pressed, it was as it ought to have been, slow and delicate and over as quickly as it had begun, while their hearts continued to thump against their chests long after it had finished. The culmination of years of heartfelt friendship, rocky roads, had led to this point... And neither of them were about to rush it now.

Slumber caught up with them soon after. They lay there, nestled together beneath the thin blanket, with the lights streaming through the half-closed blinds, without a care in the world. Her head had settled against his chest, and as such rose and fell with each breath he took. It was quite the soothing sensation, and she wasn't going to wake for anything.

Well, mostly anything.

Around midnight the lights became more severe, as though Nar Shaddaa's night scene had just begun. So bright were they that Jyn winced when her eyes opened, and without warning she buried her face against his chest to avoid it all together. He was awake too, it seemed, and his quip had her grinning from ear to ear.

"Then why don't you, some time?" she asked, mumbling the words into his chest before glancing up at him. The suggestion he made next had her nodding her head, one extra day here before they began their venture back across the stars? She could live with that. No, she would enjoy that. Even if only because of the company she would get to keep.

"You'll have to show me the best places" she said, still hiding her face against him before sighing heavily. That meant she had to get up, didn't it? They had slept the day away effortlessly, and now that night had fallen it was time for them to get moving.

She didn't want to, truth be told.

She was quite happy to sit there with him.

And so... She didn't. She waited for him to make the first move instead.

[member='Ar'ekk']

 

[Arekk]

"This planet does have good places, believe it or not. I'll show you in the morning."

One of them had to get up to get the other moving along, though the sleepiness and tiredness had already kicked in. He chose to rise first and kept the blanket wrapped around Jyn so she wouldn't feel cold on the way to the bedroom, the cushions in the couch remained spread about and unorganized.

Thinking she wouldn't mind, Ar'ekk picked her up by the legs so she wouldn't have to walk through the cold floor barefoot and instead he would do that.

As they made their way through the dark hallway and reaching the man's bedroom, he gently lowered and laid her body and head on the comfortable and cold pillow. If there was any other feeling where you could feel like you were reaching the starts, this would be another perfect example.

"Watch this."

He said with an ear-to-ear smirk upon his face, touching a small panel near the thick white wall and fiddling with the buttons. Suddenly, the king sized bed where Jyn was sleeping earlier started to slowly rotate on Ar'ekk's command until it reached the desired position which was aiming towards the window. The blinds remained as they were so the morning sunshine wouldn't hit their eyes at full strenght, not for anything they were over a hundred floors.

He stood there with nothing but a smile, clearly proud of the demonstration he just offered to Jyn. Truth be told, however, he was also kind of falling asleep standing.

[member="Jyn Sol"]

 

[Lief]

"I'll hold you to that" she said, holding back a yawn; had they actually slept much? Or did it just seem that way due to how oddly broken up it had been? She did not know for sure. She doubted it even really mattered. Neither of them were in any real rush to get back to reality, a break was likely needed for the both of them.

He rose then, forcing her to lift her head and set it back against the sofa instead. Again she blinked against the harsh lights, yet before she could adjust to her new state, or stand up herself to follow him wherever it was he was going to lead, he leaned down to pluck her from the ground, one hand supporting her back and the other hooking under her legs.

She hadn't been carried like that for as long as she could remember. Likely not since [member='Jericho'] had brought her from Arthos, when her body was writhing in pain and she hadn't quite mastered her ability to funnel out the bad emotions. That memory made her shudder.

"What are you doing?" she inquired curiously, as he carried her back through the apartment, still shrouded in the thin blanket, and settled her gently into the bed. "Oh, not this again... I'm fine out in the-- oh..." In the time it had taken her to say such things he had gone to a panel on the wall, and whatever he had done had caused the bed to shift and turn toward the window.

Her eyes widened, mesmerized up until the point that she noticed just how tired he was.

Without another word she reached toward him with the Force, something she usually wouldn't permit herself to do but in truth she was just as exhausted, and with a gentle push she nudged him toward the bed. It was gigantic, plenty of space for the both of them even if he wanted to try and remain more gentlemanly. She would not have him sleeping on the sofa unnecessarily. Not on her watch.

[member='Ar'ekk']

 

[Arekk]

He knew it was impossible to refuse going back to sleep in the sofa since she would hold him to that. The pull from the Force that Jyn sent towards Ar'ekk made him get pushed towards the bed and he slowly got tucked inside, completely tired just like her. To be fair, they had just spent a shy half an hour just enjoying the little things in life by the living room yet it seemed like hours had just passed. The night was still pretty much young and the sun of the Smuggler's Moon wouldn't come out anytime soon in the horizon.

The window in the young man's bedroom was wider than the one in the living room yet the lights that shimmed through caused less troubles for their sights although just a tidbit of the neon lights came through them. Sunshine in the morning would be bright if any of them used the wall panel to lift the blinds and the clouds mixed with a colorful blue sky would make for the perfect weather, considering how many floors above ground they were. Ar'ekk turned around and moved the sheets upwards to cover himself and Jyn just comfortably enough to get some much needed rest.

"Good night." He whispered in the dark.

Without another word but a warm smile, he kissed Jyn's temple and set aside another braid of hair that had gotten in their way which he seemed to like doing. It's been weeks since he had gotten a peaceful evening like this and nothing else could've made it better than having her presence.

She meant everything to him.

[member="Jyn Sol"]