The Shadow World…

[Lugus Porkins]

"I have some scented candles at home. I never light them I just smell. You can have some risotto and then take one with you. Be a candle sniffer with me," He smiled lightly but he couldn't get passed what she said. It hurt him when she said the galaxy needed more people like him instead of her. His heart hurt for her.

"I get paid," he said this very bluntly and as though the statement had no place in the conversation. He had a point to make with it though. "Yeah sure I could be an engineer like my dad wants. I could make more using that degree I have, but I love being a pilot for the navy. Not to mention the pays not half bad." He grinned widely almost looking greedy.

"I don't know a lot about the jedi, but from my understanding you don't get paid. So that would make mine the job and yours more of a... service," he gave a nod to confirm his own statement. "I'm getting paid to risk my life. You volunteered I guess? Not sure how they get a 4-year-old to do that..." He glanced down.

[member="Corvus Raaf"]

 

[Corvus Raaf]

Corvus pondered the idea of just hanging out. Going to someone’s house for risotto and could even work on the smelling of the candles part. The only challenge would be that she spent all her time teaching or on missions. Time off to socialise? Maybe that’s why Jedi tended to date other Jedi if they dated at all.

“And you don’t do it for the money – I know that for sure. You do it because you want to. I guess I do to, but in a way, being a Jedi is an obligation. If you’re Force-sensitive and you don’t join the Academy, you can be sure some Sith down the line will find you and give you fewer options about joining their side.”

“And I joined young because it’s the best way to ensure you don’t develop too strong an attachment to your family. Real life complicates being a Jedi sometimes – but I don’t think we should go back there now.”

“On the plus side, I’m feeling a lot better. Hungry, but I’ll understand a sensible desire for me to not eat just yet. And…can I ask you a serious question? What’s the best scented candle?”

[member="Lugus Porkins"]

 

[Lugus Porkins]

She might not admit it but Lugus sensed there was more to it than she let on. She admitted there wasn't anything else she would be, she guessed that she wanted to be a jedi, and yet it was an obligation that she didn't want to back to right away. Complicated was one word for it, but not the only word. He smiled as she admitted to feeling better.

"You ruined my snack, you monster, or you would have had something to eat," He glanced around real quick. "I don't know where it went, but you should be ashamed to call yourself Corelian." He glared at her with his face scrunched up and menacing. He almost had himself convinced, but then chuckled and smiled.

"Ah well... You'll just have to smell the candles yourself. I'd hate to tell you my favorite as the best and then you end up turning your nose to it. It wouldn't be the best then would it?" He smiled very assured in his answer.

"Can I ask you something? It's more of a request. When we get to Onderon, which should be any second now, I plan to take you to a hospital and they most likely monitor you. But after that just... Take a day. It doesn't have to be with me even thought you would get delicious seafood risotto and an awesome candle. Not to mention great company and at least three laughs an hour. No pressure or shame involved. Not that I'm trying to bribe you," he gave a cheeky grin. Just have yourself an extra day to recuperate. Don't worry about anything outside of the moment. Give yourself a day just to be you. Not Corvus the jedi, the person, the sister, the grandmaster. Just Corvus."

Lugus shrugged, "You did say you've never had a day off. You know what they say about all work and no play. Your not dull yet but if you keep going like this it's only a matter of time." He shook his head playfully.

[member="Corvus Raaf"]

 

[Corvus Raaf]

Corvus smiled and momentarily closed her eyes. A day off. A whole day with nothing to do but relax, enjoy herself and play.

In truth it sounded an anathema to her. What she loved was teaching Padawans. She felt alive when she was keeping peace in the galaxy. If she ever had a very good reason to have a day off, she’d choose to spend the whole day in the archives. Researching the Ruusan Wars or similar. Maybe she was essentially a loner? Maybe that was just who she was – no more and no less. She perhaps preferred her own company?

“It’s a great offer but I know I wouldn’t settle. I’d be thinking about what I should and could be doing. I know I’d be lousy company and to be fair…I love being Corvus the Jedi. For me, I think that is Corvus.”

She smiled at Lugus. “But the next time we meet, we’ll have to grab a risotto, right? On that you have my word. So…where’s next for you, what’s your next mission?”

[member="Lugus Porkins"]

 

[Lugus Porkins]

He grinned. At least she gave it some thought. He almost had her convinced or at least he had thought so. From the beginning he assumed her answer was no. Nothing wrong with that. He told her it didn't have to be with him and he meant it. He shook his head when she called herself lousy company. He had his own thoughts about Corvus the Jedi. The grin slipped at the next part. He winced as well. Next time? It wasn't the first time he heard that. At least she didn't... No she did promise him. Yep, he'd heard that before.

"I don't mind you saying no, but I don't need the consolation prize," he wasn't mad even if it did seem like there was a little venom in his voice. He might have been a little peeved and but he didn't let the show through. He just remained calm smiled lightly. "You're a Jedi. You'll be on your Jedi planets. I'm a pilot. I'll be just above my planets. We'll probably never see each other again. Which you know, why should we? We don't really mean anything to each other. We just met today. We could wake up tomorrow and forget each others names and I doubt either of us would be tore up about it. Just some pudgy pilot and some violet-eyed Jedi." He shrugged, "I'm not trying to guilt you or make you feel bad. It's just a sad truth. People come and go. Life was fine before today and life will be fine afterwards for both of us, right? No need to make a promise that can't be kept."

"After this I'm heading to some planet. Trejo? I don't know. I don't like to think about it too much before hand or I might psyche myself out."

[member="Corvus Raaf"]

 

[Corvus Raaf]

Corvus shook her head. “None of what you said made sense to me. I promise you. It’s no consolation prize, it’s a promise. And maybe we’ll never meet again, but that isn’t why I made the promise. And it’s not about how much we mean to each other. You saved my life and you’re a good man. Why wouldn't I remember you.”

She stared at him. Had she done something wrong? Had she misunderstood? Did he now realise why she sucked at being a person? "I'll have to work out where I need to be. Ossus most likely."

[member="Lugus Porkins"]

 

[Lugus Porkins]

"If they insist on a pilot taking you back, it won't be because of anything I'm required to put in my report," He looked away nonchalantly and whistled playfully.

"I'm sorry if I was confusing. I should explain better," He took a deep breath. "People - not just women to men or vice versa but everyone - they make this promise of a next time and It just feels like a copout. Next time might happen sooner. Might not. In my line of work, next time could be a funeral. We're not promised we can take our next breath successfully." He pointed at Corvus, "You could be a ghost right now. You weren't breathing. If I had showed up any later, you could have been beyond saving. I could be taking your cold body back to Onderon instead of having this conversation with you. It's kind of scary... I'm glad the force gave us this moment though even if it's the only meeting we get."

"I just don't like to deal in next times. They're like missed opportunities," he paused for a second contemplating something. "You wanted to know about my friends? Well I have one really good one. His name is Trix. Every now and again he calls me up and says, 'come on, Porkchop. Let's go to a bar. You can pick up a girl.' I don't like bar prices, I don't like the bar atmosphere, and I suck at pick up girls. But I never tell him no. Of all of the people, he asks me. If I had told him next time then he wouldn't be my best mate. I wouldn't have anyone other than friends at work. It's sad."

[member="Corvus Raaf"]

 

[Corvus Raaf]

Corvus listened to Lugus and appreciated his honesty. And she saw the parallels.

“I appreciate all you’ve done for me,” she held up a hand, “And I know you didn’t say any of this for praise, so don’t worry. But I get the lesson about missed opportunities.”

“I put off going to see my parents for years. Had I done so when I first thought of it, things might have turned out differently? But they didn’t, and there’s no use beating myself up over what might have beens. But I know for sure that when Kana or Taeli call me up, I never say no. So maybe that’s why I’m lucky enough to say I have a best friend and a sister.”

“And we don’t know if we’ll meet again for sure, but the promise holds – and we never know what the future has in store for us. Even for Jedi, the future is always fluid, ever-changing.”

“So let’s be grateful for the friends and family we have.”

[member="Lugus Porkins"]

 

[Lugus Porkins]

He took a deep breath them smiled lightly, "I think that's probably the worst part... You don't know until you've missed something or someone until they've already been missed. As people we think someone's always going to be there, but the won't. You're absolutely right though we shouldn't get caught up in the what could have been but we can learn from it. We should be grateful to have who we do, but we shouldn't be complacent. We shouldn't settle for just that. That's when you take the smaller moments for granted."

The piloting droid comes over the comm system letting them know the ship is descending to planet. Lugus turned his attention back to Corvus.

"Well this moment is almost over. You don't have to promise me another that may or may not even exist. Just promise me you will take a day off for once, ok?" Lugus patted her shin. "A Jedi might be a big part of what you are but it isn't who you are. Also, keep in mind if you do something work related that it doesn't count. It's not a day off if you work."

[member="Corvus Raaf"]

 

[Corvus Raaf]

Corvus smiled and nodded. And she'd keep her side of the bargain sooner than either of them thought - if being suspended in a bacta tank for over 24 hours counted as a day off.

"I'll not promise to take the day off. I'll promise to look for the opportunity to do so. And I maintain my promise to have a meal with you the next time we meet."

She looked at him. "And keep the robes. You look good in them and you never know, maybe they'll look good at a fancy-dress party. And I'm sure we can find you a training saber and have the power setting turned way down. All the lights and noises just none of the damage. You just have to choose what colour blade you want."

[member="Lugus Porkins"]

 

[Lugus Porkins]

He smiled. That was the most he could do for the promises she made. He was skeptical any would be kept but it was a fun thought. He had some faith in her however.

"The one outfit I can pull off and the force sensitive claim it," He shook his head. "I can't win for loosing, can I? I'll keep them because, you know, running around pretending to be a Jedi won't get me in trouble. I'll only wear them to fancy-dress parties with you. You'd be able to smooth things over. That way the other Jedi don't flog me for being an impostor. The best I can do to defend myself is throw my hands up and surrender. I'm pretty good at begging for my life or so I've been told."

He grinned playfully only to grin even wider as she told him about getting a training saber. His mind didn't bother with the word training. He mainly heard saber. It didn't really matter any way. They were similar enough. It was probably better that Lugus didn't have one that was capable of dismemberment. "Seriously? You'd get me a training saber? This isn't a joke?" He was practically shaking with excitement. What color did he want? It was like being a kid again and picking which color balloon from the vendor in the park. "Blue." The decision wasn't as hard as he thought. "That's the color for guardians, right? That's the one."

[member="Corvus Raaf"]

 

[Corvus Raaf]

As they approached the small space-port, Corvus smiled once more. "Making things work is what I like best. And if there's a chance to wear fancy dress, I shall go as a pilot. But no blaster. So uncivilised."

"So a blue training saber it is then. It'll be hard to wield without the Force, but with practice you'll get used to handling it. It's a challenge because all of the weight is in the hilt - the blade has no mass. But unless you go up against a Sith Lord, you'll be safe enough."

And she stood and grabbed her few things that he'd rescued for her. And then she walked over and gave him a hug. "Thanks Lugus, you quite literally saved my life."

[member="Lugus Porkins"]

 

[Lugus Porkins]

He laughed slightly, "That would be a sight to see. At the next Military Gala, you're invited. We'll give everyone a nice double take. I don't blame you about the blaster. I don't particularly like them myself. Barbaric devices."

He smiled widely as she spoke about him wielding the training saber. He didn't have that plan. The thought never even crossed his mind. If anything he was going to mount it on the wall. It would be a decoration first then a toy. Mainly he would have it to show off. Don't misunderstand, he would most definitely treasure it. Probably even spend hours just admiring it.

She brought him from his thoughts with the sudden hug and thanks or at least it felt sudden for him. It wasn't expected. She was a Jedi after all. What if she was developing Florence Nightingale Syndrome? Don't be an idiot. It's just a friendly gesture, He reminded himself. He gave her a light squeeze with one arm then pat her back.

"It was just the right thing to do," he retracted and smiled. "Thank you for the adventure... and the robes."

[member="Corvus Raaf"]