Private The Apprentice Exams

[Natima Vando]

Location: Bastion Royal Academy, Testing Rooms.


This was the dumbest thing that Natima had gotten herself stuck with, but there was no getting around it. She had to retake her Apprentice exam or she wouldn't be able to get paired with a master. Sitting in the conference room, she found she was only one of about thirty students, and the instructor before them looked like he was birthed by an exceptionally ugly Rancor mother; she couldn't remember what the race was called, but she knew they were unflattering. Several other men stood around the room, though they looked more like acolytes than instructors, or maybe they just lacked a sense of fashion.

Either way, papers were soon handed out to each of them, and the ugly man before them smacked his hand loudly on the desk towards the front of the room. "Listen up you muckrats, this is the Apprentice Exams, and we will not tolerate any of your misbehavior. There will be no cheating, there will be no retesting, and murder is not permitted. You will do this exam to the best of your abilities, failure means you will be placed back to the start of your time as an acolyte. If this is your second time retaking the test and you fail, you will be placed in the labor division and stripped of all your Sith rank." His voice boomed through the room, though Natima noted that his voice was probably the only thing he had going for him. It was firm, full of authority, but one look at that face and...well she didn't need to go into detail. Though perhaps she was being a hypocrite, her people couldn't write home about their looks. On a more serious note, she didn't like the idea of being ejected out of the Sith Academy all together, but she was fairly certain she didn't fail the last test. Strange. Then again, the Sith Empire hardly made any sense to her. "There will be no more questions, nor will there be any help provided to you. Your instructors are going to be watching your every move, and looking for usege of the force. If we even suspect you of trying something, you will immediately fail the test." One again, the Instructor slammed his hand onto the desk, his voice going a volume level higher as he gave another announcement. "YOU BEGIN NOW!"

Scowling, Natima turned the test over, and immediately drew a blank.

Question One: What is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?

Wait...did they mean an Aldaranian or a Drommund Kaas swallow? What did any of this have to do with being a Sith? Natima bit her lip, gripping her writing utensil tightly in hand as she wasn't sure what to do. Who the hell wrote this test?

Darth Daiara

 

[Darth Daiara]

Aradia already had a master, which made this whole ordeal a bit of slight. The girl didn't have much in life, but she could proudly say that she had been claimed by Kaalia Pavanos . And off the streets, no less.

It wasn't until she left the secluded abode of the now former Triumvir of Strength that she began to understand what that title meant. Under Avacyn, Aradia had received a good education. But nothing spoke to power more than how people responded to you. She understood the power of that name now, and while it no longer applied to her mistress, Aradia was of the firm belief that she shouldn't be made to take tests with the unclaimed because of it.

I mean didn't they know who taught her?

Much to her chagrin, Aradia's patronage bought her no favors. While she remained in the capitol under Adriana Fortemps 's charge, she would continue her training here at the academy.

Which meant taking the entry exams.

"What the Netherworld is air-speed velocity," the girl breathed under her breath. She stared at the paper, her stress palpable as she she resisted the urge to simply light it on fire and walk out.

Mistress please come pick me up.

Avacyn would be unmovable to such a plea, and a month ago Aradia would never have dared to utter it. As she looked at question two, the concept of calling home once again crossed her mind.

Question two: How can you fold an origami rose in 3 moves?

The vein in Aradia's temple throbbed. She glanced to her left, watching as another wanna be acolyte started to fold her paper and try it.

Natima Vando

 

[Natima Vando]

Looking at the second question, Natima felt her patience falter. This wasn't a test, it was a joke. They were mocking them. A small part of her wanted to take hold of her knife and challenge the Overseer to a trial by combat, but that might break the rules; and she'd rather not lose all her progress thus far. Her life of crime had taught her two things in particular, one was that you never played by the rules, and two was that you strive to never being caught. Perhaps it was time to utilize a play such as that. She looked to question three now, and was relieved to find something she actually understood.

Question three: What is the answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything?

That one was rather easy. She scribbled down the answer '42'. If only ever question could be so easy. Still, she needed to get the answers to one and two, but she had no clue how to do so. Then again, she did have telepathy as a Shi'ido, and they probably couldn't sense that. She paused her work, focusing on her senses, and projected a message to the woman across from her. Hopefully she didn't freak out.

"Hey, don't freak, but do you know what one and two are? I have three if you want to trade." The voice would be calm and gentle, though in truth Natima was wrestling with a greased womp-rat as she tried to maintain the connection. These idiots wouldn't realize what she was up to until it was too late, or at least that was the plan.

Darth Daiara

 

[Darth Daiara]

Aradia startled ever so slightly, the motions hidden by a fake-out gasp and suck on her finger. Paper cut. Definitely a paper cut. She gave the head teacher a sheepish glance, turning her attention back down to her paper with a sense of reverence.

...

Her gaze slipped left, then right, looking for the source.

Are you kidding me? I'm not cheating. You hear what they did to someone at the last exams? Her voice was tight and stressed, the concept of trouble driving her spine stiff in the chair.

Feck off.

Her knuckles went white on the desk, her attention driven to the next question.

Question four: What flavor does the color purple resemble?

"What?" she whispered sharply, her incredulous growing. She looked to her right, wide, wild eyes catching Natima Vando 's gaze. Oh they were screwed.

 

[Natima Vando]

She was arguing. She was seriously trying to argue right now on the most insanely ridiculous test she had ever seen. What a load of bantha-wash. Unable to hold the connection, Natima released it, several words of annoyance fluttered in her mind of what to tell this woman. They were both going to fail if they didn't cheat, what was the point of doing nothing at all to change that? She bit her lip as she pondered trying to press on, but it seemed unlikely. They established direct eye contact as the woman read ahead, and Natima could only hope the girls resolve was slipping. She couldn't take the strain for long. But neither could Natima.

Moving on to question five, Natima wanted to snap her writing utensil in half at what it said.

Question five: Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks. Who killed the the forth man?

This was some sort of sick joke. It had to be. There was no other excuse for it. Maybe they were just seeing how much they could annoy her before she tried to kill someone. Seeing little recourse in her actions, Natima reached out again, hitting the woman with another message.

Listen, if we don't work together we are going to fail. Either way we lose, this way we have the best chance. Come on!

She took another pause in her test, focusing on making this girl see her point of view, as she locked on with tepathy yet again. Though it seemed unlikely it would work.

My name is Natima, and I swear to the force I will make your life a living hell if I fail this. So come on, work with me here.

Probably not the best way to make friends, but she was getting furious over this exam. She was willing to do anything to not fail right now.

Darth Daiara

 

[Darth Daiara]

Question five: Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks. Who killed the the forth man?

Well that's easy! The ex wife behind him! Aradia perked, eagerly writing the answer across the provided space. For a moment, the girl felt a burst of confidence, her rejection of the offer feeling pretty solid... Until she looked at question 6.


Question six: How much wood could a kyber chuck chuck if a kyber chuck could chuck kyber?

Aradia groaned, her forehead outwardly smacking into the table. This. Was. Bullshit! She already had a master! Kaalia Pavanos never asked her questions like this...

My name is Natima, and I swear to the force I will make your life a living hell if I fail this. So come on, work with me here.

Aradia's lips pursed, her eyes hidden as they narrowed down between the paper and the space between her arm. She slowly lifted it back up, glowering at the paper until the ink blurred together and danced as one heap. Try as she might, no answers jumped forward to her.

She took a deep breath, acknowledging the voice.

"Fine. And you wonder why you don't have a Master, can't even do a test yourself-- Five is ex-wife. You got six?" Unbeknownst to them, this exchange wouldn't be enough.
Not.
By.
A.
Long shot.

 

[Natima Vando]

Question six was a joke. The answer was obvious. The answer was none, the kyber chuck was chucking kyber, not wood. This test was certainly bizarre, almost relying on strange questions and trickery of wording. It didn't help that she was still missing a few other questions, but she had hopes that her new 'friend' would come through for her.

It was a great relief when Aradia replied back, though she didn't appreciate the snide comment, though being given an answer to number five gave the girl a pass. Ah, ex-wive. How could she not have seen that one? That small boost of confidence was quashed though, as the saw number seven below that.

Number Seven: What is best in life?

Feth. She remembered hearing it somewhere, someone had said it during a night of drunken non-sense on Nar Shaddaa, but what was it? Natima paused for a moment, pulling hard on that thread of a memory, but it came back after her effort. To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of their women. Yes! That was it, though she found the last part a bit crude, she remembered it clear as day now.

Number Six the answer is none. Number Seven is weird, but this is the answer...

Sharing the answer with the woman, the Shi'ido felt pretty good about the test thus far. She had gotten at least four questions right as of now, but she would soon lose all confidence as the test continued on.
Darth Daiara