Private Sow

[Auteme]

The Ashina estate's landing pads were still full, many ships spilling over into nearby fields and clearings; the influx of Jedi to their council remained even this late into the night (it was closer to morning, now, but Auteme still laboured under the impression she would be able to sleep tonight). At this hour no one was out, a few small and excitable groups planning and working, the rest taking up rooms for the night.

No one but her and her niece. She made her way down, guided partly by the Force, and then the sound of rustling movement; the removal of tarp, rise of the canopy, packing of bags. She caught her niece putting her stuff in the X-wing's small storage compartment.

"Tight fit," she said. She reached to her bag and produced a small paper bag, Dordalone's printed on its side. Over the years she'd been practically a donut shipper to Concord Dawn; one of the few things Loske missed from Coruscant. Her daughters had developed much the same taste, with Auteme's help. "Any more room?"

She beckoned the girl down.

Talin Treicolt ​

 

[Talin Treicolt]

That dark cloud still writhed above her head. The work of loading and pre-flight checks had taken the roamin' thoughts away, but she just couldn't shake the lastin' dread. She and Tansu shoulda been locked in the guest quarters gossipin' 'till the sun came up and eatin' junk food. Instead, she was takin' off, and didn't know when she'd be back. Aunt Auteme's voice broke her brooding. Instinctively, she almost snapped a response, but her eyes wandered side long to the donuts. A short nod was allowed before she came down off the ship.

"Thanks. Dunno when I'll get anymore of these."

She took the bag of donuts when offered up, peekin' inside. Her favorite. Talin gave a begrudging smile before stuffing her mouth forcefully with fried dough.

"Sorry our visit got cut short." She pushed out between chewing. "None of it was supposed ta be this way."

Suddenly, she had lost her appetite. The donut was put back in the sack and rolled up for safe keeping. Eyes on the floor, her shoulders slumped in defeat.

"I don't think I fix this one."

 

[Auteme]

Auteme’s now-vast Force abilities got put to use weaving a bench for them to sit on. It was easy, a low spring dew was already forming. Her mist-weaving was effortless. She sat, and beckoned her niece, in part so she could grab a donut of her own. She hadn’t been to Coruscant in years now, and it’d likely be even longer with the Empire in the Core. "It'll be a while, yeah."

She took it in silence, letting Talin stew for a couple more moments, before giving a simple nod. "Su was pretty upset."

There was a part of her -- the part that had brought her to the Chancellor's office -- that was mapping routes of conversation, responses, results. There were a great many ways to make this worse, a great many things she did not know. The twins had grown up so much in a short few years, lives so far diverged from when she'd seen them last. What story could she tell, lesson could she impart?

No, it was a question that had forced Jonath's hand before. She gave the same to Talin. "So, what are you going to say to her?"

Talin Treicolt ​

 

[Talin Treicolt]

A bench made'a mist. Man, that was cool. The thought startled her. When they had come to the core, Aunt Auteme had been about as cool as they'd come. When did that feelin' stop? If anything, she was cooler now, with her hair all wild and the sense of freedom that wafted off her like petals catchin' the wind. At some point, Jedi hero had lost some of it's meaning, and her brilliant Aunt had become another elder who didn't deserve her secrets. Talin took the seat offered and laid the bag in between them.

"Dunno. Never been good at apologies. Don't think sorry means much with somethin' like this, anyways."

Talin wasn't sorry in the wholest sense, either. For Tansu's reaction, and pain, yes. But Talsin...

"I just wanted to protect Jon. He ain't like that, what Talsin was makin' him out to be." Fury manifested as a lump in her throat, makin' her words hoarse. "He's just like me. May notta been born on Concord Dawn, but through and through, he's got the blood. Wanted to protect us - and that temper. I'm bad as him - no, no, I'm worse. Talsin gonna haul me off to prison, too?"

Blue orbs bore into the side of her ship, where the saber squadron insignia was painted with rough edges. The focal point was a barrier against the tears threatenin' to flow again.

"This is a lot like what you went through with pa, huh?"

His answer to it all had been the same. Run, and don't ever look back.

 

[Auteme]

"No, he won't," she said. "Not in much of a position to do much hauling."

Talin's next question, though, was a reminder of why that Chancellor part of her was never wholly right. She was surprised Maynard and Loske had shared that history with their children. Perhaps that's why they hadn't been quite so worried about the twins to pull them back — if they'd shared enough of how complicated the galaxy was, and the girls still chased it, then they'd prepared them as best they could. But of course, no preparation was ever enough.

"I suppose it is," she said. She and Maynard had never been close; her sparse visits to Concord Dawn tended to have them seated at opposite ends of the table for dinner. And yet, she had been in his mind; what she knew of him was shaped by the memories he had shared. Those moments — Ziost, Korriban, Dantooine — were the very same that had put Tilon on the crash course with his children tonight.

"In some ways. But this… you. You're different." A hand found its way to Talin's back, for a gentle rub.

"Mm. We formed the New Jedi Order- I say we, really it was your parents, and Ryv, and others; I was a spectator, for the most part- it was formed because we had few elders, no Jedi in the Core to help in the way we needed, the way the galaxy needed. There was an anger, at the heart of it — righteous anger, for the most part, but anger still.

"Anger hurts people. Not always, but often enough; that shame you feel about it is natural. If your father had known, cared about… mm. Well, that's what Tilon was talking about. Having a view of justice beyond the immediate relation, that sees everyone." She paused a moment, wishing she had more space to reflect on what had been said, but Talin was more pressing here.

"It might have changed how he'd acted, in the moment and after.

"So here you are. Things are different. You hit someone you know, hurt someone you know. I can't tell you what to do or where to go — maybe away is the best place right now. Maybe there's someone you need to talk to more than me.

"But I know you love your sister, and I know she loves you, too. And oh, believe me, it's hard to love someone who's run from your life.

"So whatever's next, I want you to say it here and now: when will you know to come back?"

Talin Treicolt ​

 

[Talin Treicolt]

Behind pursed lips, emotions churned. Talin wasn't real sure yet what she thought about Tilon's version of justice. Jon was walkin' away free, but Talsin was hurt, and her and Tansu were broken in ways she wasn't sure were gonna heal. It almost felt vindictive, rather than just - to fracture the best parts of her life. Jail woulda been nicer. Auteme's mention of the path less walked spurred further confusion. Ma and Pa had told 'em about it, too - and it felt like a lesson - but not once, in all her years, had Maynard mentioned bein' sorry about what he'd done.

"Away is better." She affirmed, the only thing she's sure of. "Uhm..."

How did she even begin to explain Morrow? She was dyin' to tell someone, and with Tan on the outs, Auteme was probably as good as it got. She loved tellin' her the boy troubles when she was younger - their aunt had never treated it like some fling, nor small drama, just listened intently and offered up all her sagely wisdom.

"Damien's got a crew out in the rim now." Talin would spare his mother the details of how that came to be. "Ship crew, I mean, nothin' crazy. One of his boys and me, well..."

Talin was starting to regret having said anything. A nervous hand raked through blonde locks whilst she stammered for words. There was no title to put on it. Oh, yeah, he's the guy I see conquering the galaxy in my dreams and I just can't get enough of him. That wasn't gonna go over well.

"We met that night at the Drop, actually. Y'know, me and Tansu, we've been... I dunno. We both got into different things since comin' here, and there was a parta me she'd never seen, 'till tonight. Well, once, but it was on durin' the battle on Coruscant and I don't think she thought it was real. He's seen it, though. He ain't scared of it."

A heavy sigh contained all the burdens of youth. She leaned forward, starin' at her boots.

"Maybe out there's the better place for me. It's familar. All that sense of justice, and whatever, that's how it goes out there. Maybe I shouldn't come back. Leave Tan and Tal to do what they will. Probably hurt 'em a lot less if I wasn't here buckin' against whatever she's tryin' to be."

 

[Auteme]

"Ah. Well, I'm glad someone's telling me what my son is up to."

It was as Talin remembered. Auteme gave a little smile at the embarrassment -- ah, young love, and such -- but not for a moment did her attention waver. It struck her then that there was the missing presence from their earlier confrontation. Very classic, that the girls moved in opposite yet parallel directions in their choice of partners. Her focus remained on Lin and Su, but something tugged at her heart, in that way she didn't get to feel often these days.

"You know, Damien's father..." she trailed off, breathed deep to find her voice again. Tonight wasn't a night for her tears. "He's off, I don't know where. I trust what he's doing is important, but so often I find myself in pain that he isn't here. For me, for Damien. I, ah- mm, I almost don't want to remember how long it's been. I find myself starting a letter to him every month, asking him to come back. Never finish them, not that I could send them, and even if I could... I'm angry with him. He hurt me, by leaving."

She took another deep breath, wiped her eyes. "But if he turned up tomorrow, I'd take him back in a heartbeat. You, being part of your sister's life -- it's not a decision you get to make on your own. She gets a say, too, and it's always worse for both of you if you don't listen."

She paused. The still of the night played on her senses; the least used but perhaps most developed was the Shasan truth-sense she shared with Tilon. Talin had spoken no lies, but the undercurrent of her words held something back. Again, Auteme spoke to draw her out.

"There's something else on your mind," she said. She found her humor again for a moment, and cracked a smile. "Am I too old to get the juicy details now? Is that what it is? I used to practically get SIA profiles on them, how they kiss, now he's just some boy who isn't scared of you. And I'd hope he's not."

Talin Treicolt ​

 

[Talin Treicolt]

Auteme’s break in composure was so uncharacteristic it startled Talin. The tales their family shared ‘round dinner tables never much featured their long lost uncle. It had conditioned Talin to expect anger - but not sorrow, not from the heart of a giant. It was so raw, and real, and mature. The twin imagined her sister and her, twenty years passed without speaking or even knowing whereabouts the others were. Talin couldn’t think to deny Tansu, either. The lump in her throat made a reappearance.

“I’m so sorry.” She whispered.

A blonde mane would conceal expression as she leaned to find her aunts shoulder, some measure of comfort for the both of them. It was like she was a girl again. They stayed like that, until Auteme prodded for further gossip about her new romance. Consideration was given to her words before she spoke.

“He’s soooo handsome. In that, rugged, roguish kinda way. Actually-“

Fumbling through her jacket pocket, Talin produced a fob ring. It was more odd collection than keys. A pair of mini golden dice and a fuzzy lil’ loth wolf were its most notable inhabitants. Careful fingers searched for the small device with a star logo on it. With the click, an array of holo images projected above. Talin and Morrow at some place called The Grid, smooshed into a booth. She hadn’t given him the option of declining when she drug him in after rounds of swoop racin’ sims and holo-shootin’. His enthusiasm showed.

“Ain’t he cute?” The question actually brought her a smile, genuine and warm, despite their nasty evenin’. “His name is Morrow, and he’s tall and dark and mysterious. Makes ya want to pick him up like a book and read him. Kinda serious, but that kinda makes things funnier, sometimes.”

Then there was the other parts. Amber flashed before her eyes again. Orange skies casted the taste of ash on her tongue. Some of the excitement faded as she continued on, this time less than a hundred parsecs a minute.

“He put himself in some deep trouble to save me gettin’ killed, even after I did somethin’ to hurt him. Always has my back. And it ain’t just that he ain’t scared of me. He gets me. He doesn’t ask me to change. Be less than what I am, or quieter, or nicer. Doesn’t ask me to put any ‘o me aside. He just… understands.”

 

[Auteme]

"We have a type," she laughed. She waited for the pictures, and-

Auteme had been across the galaxy, a thousand worlds; she'd travelled enough to get accustomed to new places quickly. One thing she found consistently, for any world with rain, was that same slight change in air pressure before the storm. Most people, with practice and attention, could come to sense the drop anywhere they went. It came before even those dark clouds and distant thunder.

She sat up slightly, looked to the sky. It was a cloudless night, clear a hundred miles around. Her body felt a storm coming.

Auteme could see it, what Talin saw, what she felt. A classic enough pairing, the outgoing girl and brooding boy, but it felt strange, looking at him. The stare he gave in the first picture, the curl of his lips in the next, the rage across his face as Talin did her very best to give him a silly one. The way she felt was real, readable, but her grasp on Morrow slipped for every moment Auteme looked at him.

"He's where you're going?" she asked, knowing the answer already. She didn't know this boy, but had no intention of taking anything from Talin. "It's good that you have someone who understands you."

The late hour was getting to her. She kept it simple. "So you met at, ah, the Drop- where's he from?"

Talin Treicolt ​

 

[Talin Treicolt]

“Yep.” Talin bobbed her head enthusiastically, agreeeing on all fronts. "Rim's got more work for someone whose only skills are farmin' and fightin'. Should be able to make it down there a bit."

It was the silver linin’ to come off of such a dark cloud. She already missed Su terribly, despite bein’ so hurt - they hadn't even gotten to catch up! - but somehow she missed Morrow more than that, and they had only been apart a week. Even before this, the thought of returning to Atrisia had been met with loathing.

"He was just gamblin' on some matches we were hostin'. Got hung up in our cross fire." Talin babbled, further outlining the events that had taken place for her Aunt. "He's from... erm... Dantooine."

He'd only mentioned it in passing. Talin didn't pry. Family was a solidified value across Concord Dawn, but every once in a while, you'd find someone like Jon who avoided the topic or found their own, when their own blood was thin.

"Think maybe home wasn't so great, and that's why he left." A yawn escaped unannounced. The adrenaline was finally wearin' off. "Stars. The sun must be comin' up by now."

 

[Auteme]

It wasn't long enough for Talin to notice, but the delay in Auteme's response was an eternity for her. Was now really the time to put more worries on her? A dozen dangers came to mind; none, surely, that Talin had not faced already. And this... Morrow. Such an ominous name -- why did it clench her heart so?

But it was that part of her speaking, the one that wished Damien had stayed home. Even indebted to a crime lord he had that spark in him now that she would never have been able to give. Not alone.

"Don't fly tired," she said, and once more produced the answer to her problems -- a thermos full of a rich tea, a bit of milk so it went down easy and a bit of honey to jumpstart the engine. "Mm. And... better yet, don't fly alone."

She took Talin's hand and put a small, water-worn stone in her palm. It was her own work, this time, after a year of study from Jend-Ro's notes -- a new network she'd only just finished. "I'm not much for comms, since I'm often out in the middle of nowhere lately. But all you need to do -- hold this, focus on where you are, and do it until you feel me on the other end. And I'll be there."

She closed the girl's fingers around it.

"Stay safe, Talin."

Talin Treicolt ​