Approved Tech Shock Arrow

[Ezra Nelson]

OUT OF CHARACTER INFORMATION

• Intent: Start making the arrows used by Ezra and Taji as well as a few NPCs.
• Image Source: Here
• Canon Link: MA
• Permissions: N/A
• Primary Source: N/A

PRODUCTION INFORMATION

• Manufacturer: Ezra Nelson / Taji Nelson
• Affiliation: Ezra Nelson / Taji Nelson / NPCs I'm making
• Model: EN-2
• Modularity: The payload of the Arrows could be changed out.
• Production: Limited
• Material: Durasteel, Circuitry, Battery

TECHNICAL SPECIFICATIONS

• Classification: Arrow
• Size: Average
• Weight: Heavy
• Explosive Type: None
• Delivery Method: Fired
• Effective Range: Long Range
• Area Of Effect: Personal
• Stopping Power: Average

SPECIAL FEATURES

• Easy to make

STRENGTHS

• Can knock people out by electrocuting them.

WEAKNESSES

• The arrows can be shrugged off by the species with stronger constitutions.
• EMPs
• Destroying the Arrow.
• Useless on Armor

DESCRIPTION

An arrow created by Ezra on the world of Denon. This was made from studying the Shocker Bullets created by his brother as a non lethal form of ammunition meant to only incapacitate targets. However, as Ezra did not want to use a gun for himself and believed a bow and arrow were more suitable he designed the Shock Arrow for himself. While these will work on most targets, there are some that it would be ineffective on. These include those with scaly skin or fur that would protect the arrow from connecting to their body. They would be effective on Twi'leks, Zeltrons, and Humanoid species without any form of protective coating on their body. In addition to this, rubber would be a way to insulate against the arrow.

Forcefields would also be a way to block the arrow from being used on them. Forcefields would be effective against it. Armor would be an effective counter-measure as well since it is useless on armor.

 

[Aldric]

Heya,

Explosive Type: N/A

N/A (Not applicable) isn't a valid entry for this field, your Explosive Type will have to be listed. Based on the things you've written, an Electric Charge seems appropriate.

Effective Range: Longfield

Can you clarify whether you meant Long Range or Battlefield for this rating?

Stopping Power: N/A

Same here, this is not a valid rating for this field, use None if the submission is supposed to have no stopping power.


Finally, your Description currently constitutes only one sentence. I'm going to need you to expand on that more until it's at least a decent-length paragraph. Explain how the arrow works, write about its history, how powerful its charge actually is, give some examples of targets this would work on, or simply describe the way it looks. Give us something to better imagine the specific details of the arrow and how it functions, be creative!

Ezra Nelson

 

[Ezra Nelson]

Aldric I believe my edits would be sufficient to make the arrow suitable for approval.

 

[Aldric]

Explosive Power and Stopping Power still have N/A as their rating, but the template requires a rating between None and Extreme. You'll need to change those fields to one of the ratings.

Other than that it looks solid, good work on the description.

Ezra Nelson

 

[Emerald]

Aldric Fixed, I do believe.

 

[Aldric]

Spoiler: Balance Ratings & Sum

-2	Production: Limited
0	Size: Average
0	Weight: Average
+2	Effective Range: Battlefield
+2	Area Of Effect: Battlefield
0	Stopping Power: Average

Σ = 2

You're currently 2 points over in the sub's balance and would have to note its Battlefield-wide Effective Range and Area of Effect in the arrow's strengths.

If I might make a suggestion, I would drop the arrow's Area of Effect to Average, based on the description and current strength, as a battlefield-wide effect doesn't entirely line up with what you've got written, but that's just my impression.

Once you got that added to the strengths and bumped the ratings down by two points we should be good.


Ezra Nelson

 

[Ezra Nelson]

Aldric Did the edits I've made balance it out?

 

[Aldric]

Heck yeah, that actually got you three under, actually. If you want to bump the ratings up by three, maybe get the weight to Very Light or something along those lines feel free to.

Ezra Nelson

 

[Aldric]

Last chance to bump those ratings before I approve it.

Ezra Nelson

 

[Ezra Nelson]

Aldric It is fine how it is.

 

[Aldric]

Bet. A very neat arrow sub, I dig it.

Approved.

Ezra Nelson