Star Wars Roleplay: Chaos

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Private Rocky Reunion

When he first left mandalore, Venu could never have imagined he would return years later. He could never have imagined that he would be one of those involved in rebuilding it. He could never have imagined the paperwork that meant. A cup of caff steamed in his hands as he strode away from the meeting room. It was a delicate balance of fixing the cities and fixing the ecosystems. Already they’re cleared toxins from a good amount of the soil but that just meant they had to reintroduce the right nutrients for the plants they wanted and begin that planting along with building up the cities now that the earth below them was no longer deadly.

Onwards he went, down the hall and through a fouyer, nodding in greeting to the mandalorians he passed. His com beeped and Venku answered without hesitation.

“Venku here.” His tone was sharp, though more out of business than actual annoyance.

“Hey, we’re waiting for you at the fields.” The voice was unfamiliar, though that aspect was slowly fading.

“Just finished up another meeting, should be there in four minutes.” The comm beeped as the call ended and Venku broke into a jog. It was three minutes to his speeder, but if he ran he could make it in one. He slid into the speeder fifty seconds later. Directing the bike out of the small city, Venku made it to the fields two minutes later.

The fields was a misnomer. They were the furthest part of the Sundari and occupied by an amalgamation of pop up buildings, tents, and canopies. They would be the farmland, but right now the land was just as empty and inhospitable as the rest of the planet. An Avaris Harpyia, the same one that called him not too long ago, waved him over with a clawed hand. “Hey Venku! Any news for the fields?”

Those around the area stopped to watch as Venku approached. It wasn’t until he was right next to the avaris, Kote, that he began to speak. “I’ve got a finalized list of crops and when and how they should be planted. You’ve all been divided into groups and each group will be assigned a job. Groups one two and three will be staking out the plots of land for the different crops. Groups four and five will head to the space port to collect the seeds and sprouts. Be careful not to jostle them. Groups six through nine…” and so it went, Venku delivering orders and directing people around the space until everyone knew their jobs.

“I could have done that you know,” Kote watched Venku with an expression that wasn’t quite pitty but wasn’t quite worry either.

“I was headed this way anyway. I’ve got to go check on the spaceport.” The avian mandalorian frowned after him, wings fidgeting on his back. “You should be taking a break every now and then.”

“I’m fine.” The words were harsh perhaps to harsh and Venku took a gulp of his caff to cover up the regret he instantly felt. Kote only sighed. “Well, if I can’t convince you not to then at least her mink something other than caff.” He offered only a nod in response as he ignited the speeders engine. He said nothing of the four cups of caff in the trash from this morning or the two more thermoses he had tucked away in the saddle bag.

In the end, there was surprisingly little he could get those at the space port, a dramatic name for what currently consisted of a few pop up buildings and the bones of permanent ones now that the soil was livable. He could bring them nothing and had no more deliveries after this and so topping off his thermos he shut off the speeder and got to work. He had no practical experience in building and so he helped move materials, mostly with the force as he could carry something almost as heavy as him that way. On he worked, ignoring the voices of those around him except for directions on what goes where. That was until those voices began calling about a ship. His current load settled to the ground and Venku turned to watch the ship approach and land among the others.

Xan Deesa Xan Deesa
 
After the incident in her apartment, she and Venku had been chatting like they've been friends for years. It mostly consisted of them teasing or jabbing at each other but there was a healthy dose of day-to-day venting, catching up and other topics buried in the list of pictures and snappy comebacks. Though recently he just simply stopped answering. She had made sure she wasn't blocked and that he was still alive, though she'd keep quiet about how she found that out, so she figured that something was wrong. From what she saw on the holonet, his drop in activity might be linked to the reconquering of Mandalore. Either way, he wasn't going to get back to her so she decided to make a plan. Something was clearly up with him.

The Wrangler freighter she borrowed way back when she was on the Derelict touched down in the improvised spaceport they had set up. Its cargo was fake, the reason for being there was fake, her identity was fake, her disguise was fake... likely the only thing that wasn't fake was the actual ship itself. But they didn't need to know that and they likely never would unless they actually did a physical inspection of her ship. Though she took a precaution for that as well. It was specifically reserved for Venku Bralor and could only be handled once he inspected it and given the all clear. Xan, kitted out with very basic Beskar'gam disembarked the ship and made sure to confirm her 'specific orders' with the inspector before he even had a chance to set foot on her boarding ramp. Studying Mando'a and the basics of the culture in a week was likely one of the stupidest things she'd done in a while and definitely stretched her own mental capabilities, but she learned enough to be able to get by with basic and formal sentences. It fit her armour's look so she didn't look too suspicious. Even getting that info was hard but with the right backdoors, anything was possible on the holonet.

She enquired about Venku's location and the dock workers thankfully was able to help her out. So she fired up her jetpack and blasted off towards where they said he'd be. He was likely not going to be happy about her impersonating his people but it was a better alternative to getting chased off or maybe even shot down. At least it wasn't real... though the price made her doubt that. She touched down close to the group and approached him when she spotted him. When she finally reached him, she studied him for a moment. "Bro you look like shit." she stated flatly, folding her arms across her chest. Hopefully he could clear her being on the planet... this armour was becoming more unbearable with each passing second. "Also, before you or someone else pops me for being a heretic or something, can you just give clearance for me to be here so I can get out of this stuff and give it back to you guys?" she quickly followed up, glancing a the other workers around them.

Venku Bralor Venku Bralor
 
"Bro you look like shit." His first instinct is to whirl around with a denial on his lips. His first instinct is to tell the voice no and find something else to help with. His first instinct- The voice finally registers. Was that “Xan?” The cyborg stood before him, dressed in a worn set of beskar’gam that hung off her ill-fitting form. “What are you doing here?” She doesn’t answer, instead going on to ask for clearance to be here. “What? Oh- of course.” Slipping his pad out of his pouch, Venku clears her with a few deft flicks of his fingers. “Now," He says, turning to face his friend, "what are you doing here?”

Xan Deesa Xan Deesa
 
A smirk formed behind the T-visor as Xan gave a casual shrug. "Well 'Xan'disa Rook' to be more precise in this case. I put a lot of effort in making this identity look legit." she quipped with a chuckle. He quickly cleared her to be on the planet and the helmet was instantly off, allowing her bright magenta hair to fall down her neck and her to take a deep breath in. Understandably he asked why she was here and she responded by pressing her helmet against his chest. "I came to see you, furball! You've been ignoring me flat the last few weeks. Thought you died or something." she explained as she walked past him and sat down on a nearby rock.

"By the way, learning Mando'a in a week is utter garbage, you know that? This was one of the most over-the-top efforts I've put into an infiltration, so be grateful." she teased as she fiddled with her armour. "Come on, let's go back to my ship. I'm dying to get out of this stuff." she quipped as she rose from her seat and gave him a slap on the shoulder to get him to follow.

When she neared her ship she glanced at him and gave a warm smile. "I wasn't lying, though. You look like an alleycat. Have things been that rough around here after the fighting?" she asked him as she gestured around them. Reaching her ship, she immediately marched towards her quarters and emerged after a few minutes in her more recognizable attire. Her holographic mask depicted a bright grin as she gestured to the mess room, grabbing a soda for each of them from the fridge. Her mask was in her pocket and a long sip was taken from the can. "How have you been, Venku?" she asked with a hint of genuine concern in her voice.

Venku Bralor Venku Bralor
 
Xan'disa huh? Well, she definitely went all out. Taking hold of her helmet, Venku offered his friend a smile. "I came to see you, furball! You've been ignoring me flat the last few weeks. Thought you died or something."

“Well, it’s good to see you.” Was all he offered, the smile turned a little strained. "By the way, learning Mando'a in a week is utter garbage, you know that?” Xan continued to speak, but he heard none of it. “Wait, you learned mando’a in a week?” Talk about over the top. “So wait, does that mean I get to call you Xan’ika?” The fading crunch of footsteps on gravel was all the answer he needed, and for the first time Venku’s tired smile split into a feral grin.

It was gone by the time Xan’s ship came into view. The modest ship stood beside the ships of other mandalorians, and it had only just come into sight when Xan stopped. "I wasn't lying, though.” She said, her brows drawing together as she examined him. “You look like an alleycat. Have things been that rough around here after the fighting?"

“I- um- yeah…. I guess you could say that. There’s been a lot to do, and after the Sith took Mandalore they turned more than half the planet into a radioactive wasteland. Not to mention that after the battle people have been returning in droves and the once they filled up the old sith fortress we had no where for anyone to stay.” Venku looked back up at her, not even aware he’d looked down in the first place. “But you didn’t come here to listen to me rant about work.” Her retreat to the ship was only a confirmation of that.

Once inside. Xan made a beeline for her room, leaving venku by the door. It wasn’t like he didn’t want Xan here, but he had work to do and couldn’t afford this kind of distraction. Metal clanged behind him as Xan removed the armor, causing Venku’s ears to pull back at the volume. Moment’s later, Xan strode out, dressed once more in her usual neon clothes. Once more Venku followed on her heels, passing unassuming door after unassuming door before finally coming to a stop in the kitchen. Settling himself in a chair, Venku accepted the soda with a smile and a flick of his tail. A smile that quickly dimmed as Xan spoke. "How have you been, Venku?" The worry was evident in her voice, and it was clear to him that their earlier conversation wasn’t as over as he thought it was.

“I- well- Tired, you know? Like I said, there’s so much to do and now that the radioactivity in and around Sundari has been brought to a more manageable level I’ve had to figure out what plants and animals to reintroduce.” Grey ears flicked back as he sighed, popping the soda open and taking a swig. “It’s not all bad though.” He explained, the tired smile once again plastered on his face. “I’ve been put in charge of the flora and fauna, so I can reintroduce just about anything I want within reason.” One ear flicked towards Xan, soon followed by the rest of his face. “How'd you learn mando'a in a week anyway?” As far as diversions went, it was as plain as day.

Xan Deesa Xan Deesa
 
He started to open up a bit and she made sure to listen to every detail. Though his last comment earned a slight smile from her. In all honesty, that was part of the reason why she was there. But she kept that bit to herself. Once they were properly situated and relaxed she could work a bit more on his mental state. It was painfully obvious that the poor guy had a ton on his plate and not much of a way to get rid of that baggage.

In the kitchen he thanked her with a smile and continued to fill her in on his situation. A smirk appeared on her lips as she took a sip of her drink. "I'm waiting for the day the entirety of Sundari is covered in catnip." she teased as she walked over to sit next to him on the couch by the booth. When he asked about her learning Mando'a, she let a chuckle escape her. "Photographic memory and determination." she quipped as she took another sip. "I sliced into the Union's archives and found a file on the language. So I simply memorized the translations, rules and all that jazz. Also I swear if you call me "Xan'ika" I'll call you "Ven'ika"." she explained, flashing a wink at the end. <"But yes. I can speak simple sentences."> she continued in a very posh and formal accent of Mando'a. "I likely won't ever use it, though. Too much effort for something I'll only ever use if I have to blend in around here."

She took another long sip and then turned slightly to face him properly. "Now talk to me, dude. I know a thousand yard stare when I see one. What's eating you up inside?" she asked with a soft and gentle voice. "And don't worry about running late or something. A little break will help you out a ton. So sit back, kick your armour off, whatever. Mandalore won't fall again if you're relaxing for a little bit." she reassured him to try and help him relax.

Venku Bralor Venku Bralor
 
"I'm waiting for the day the entirety of Sundari is covered in catnip." Venku laughed, a small sound and not as lighthearted as those in the past, but it was a laugh, and that was a rare sight indeed. Xan always knew how to get a chuckle out of him. Taking a sip of his soda, Venku listened as his friend continued to speak.

“I swear if you call me 'Xan'ika' I'll call you 'Ven'ika'." Golden eyes narrowed at the cyborg. “Fine, be that way… burc’yarueti.” Venku shot her a smirk, pleased with his new nickname. As far as nicknames went, it was an odd one. A combination of the word “burc’ya” or friend, and “aruetii” the mando’a word for outsider. The fact that aruetii was often used as an insult only made it all the more funny.

"Now talk to me, dude.” And just like that the joy was gone, poisoned by the hollow feeling seeping back into his gut. He took another drink and looked over to Xan. Still she was unwavering, waiting patiently for him to answer. His tail thumped against the couch, the end batting against Xan’s thigh. “They put me in charge.” He whispers, ears pinned on the can. The bubbles pop and fizzle inside, sounding like the white noise of a radio in interstellar space. “I’m not even eighteen and they put me in charge.” His claws scraped against the metal floor of the ship, screeching as they went. Back and forth and back and forth they moved until he registered the sound and forced them to stop. “I mean, it’s not like i was unprepared. A while back this mandalorian, Torrack, you wouldn’t know him, saw my potential, i guess?” Golden eyes flick up from the can to Xan. “He, um…. he took me under his wing and taught me how to lead. But that was on a battlefield. This… isn’t a battlefield.” Those eyes, heavy with an unnameable bundle of emotions, each one weighing against his soul and pressing down on his shoulders, darted back to the can, tracing the shape. “There aren’t any explosions or blaster bolts shooting past my head. I don’t have to watch out for my men and there are no… there aren’t any bodies to trip over or air strikes or cannons to worry about.” Venku lifts the can to his lips, only to find it empty. “And… and he was captured. During the battle on Myrkr. I don't- I don't even know if he’s alive. He could be dead for all I know! An-and Kres is busy with Mand’alor stuff. Not that I blame him, he deserves this- and he’s good at it. But-” tink, tink, tink, fat wet tears pinged against the metal of his can. Was he… crying? Why was he crying. A clawed hand touches his face, feeling the soaked fur around his eyes and tracing the equally soaked trails down his muzzle to the spot where they plummeted towards the empty metal can.

Something squeezes in his gut, and he holds back a sob. He couldn't cry, not here, not in front of Xan. Pressure builds in his throat and Venku is left gasping for air, a strangled hiccuped cry escaping his throat as he gasps. Lungs burn as he fights back more tear, wiping away those already at his eyes with so much haste that his claw comes away beaded with thick red blood. His chest aches and his tail curls in close as his shoulders hunch over. He cant cry. Not here, not now. He was having such a good day! He was holding it in and getting stuff done and half the time the pressure in his chest was barely even noticeable. His body shakes as more strangled sobs escape his throat and his lungs and throat ache. Everything is too hot, and too close and too loud. Limbs flail as he scrambles to the opposite end of the couch, away from Xan, away from the heat and the touch and the wet spot on the cushion.

And he had been doing so well....

Xan Deesa Xan Deesa
 
Xan sat in silence as he confided in her. She listened to every word and paid attention to his body language as well. She could practically feel the emotions coming off him as she watch his face contort, his eyes grow foggy and the tone of his voice shifting. It was eating him up on the inside but he was fighting back those emotions every waking moment. When he wiped at his eyes, he even broke skin with a claw which made her stress a bit for his eyes. When he threw himself into the opposite side of the couch, she rose from her seat and set her can aside.

She knelt down beside him with a gentle gaze. "Venku, hey..." she muttered with a soft and gentle voice. "Listen to me. Let it out. There's nobody here, there's nobody who will give you shit for it. You're not weak for letting it out... so just let it go." she spoke tenderly with a hushed voice. She reached out and placed a gentle hand on his shoulder as she looked up at him from her kneeling position. "It's eating you up inside and keeping it in will not help you. Let it out." she continued as she rose but kept her back arched to keep her eyes in line with his. <"Let it out, Ven'ika."> she spoke in Mando'a as her other hand rested on his shoulder as well. Carefully she would slide her hands over his back and pull him into a soft and gentle hug as she sat on the edge of the couch. <"Do not hold it in. Nobody is here."> she spoke with barely a whisper into his ear, knowing that his sensitive hearing would pick it up. She hoped that the Mando'a would help get through to him.

If she could get through to him, it would help a lot. But if it didn't... she wasn't going to give up on him. He needed support and clearly nobody was giving it to him. It was the least she could do for him...

Venku Bralor Venku Bralor
 
Crammed into the side of the couch, the last thing Venku wanted was Xan kneeling beside. Yet there she was, with a gentle smile and a calm word. “Listen to me,” she implored and he never thought he’d see the day when she asked something of him in such a calm voice. “Let it out.” She said and her words were full of a soft kindness. Venku listened, though he only partially acknowledged the words, and downright refused to believe he wasn’t weak. He was. She just couldn’t see it. Golden eyes flicked away at the thought, fleeing the sight of Xan’s face as the shame weighed heavily in his gut. He shouldn’t have deceived her like that. Now she thought he was strong, a warrior and a leader to be proud of, when that couldn’t be furthest from the truth. Xan continued to speak but Venku paid it no mind, too caught up in his own spiraling thoughts.

That was, until she spoke in a stilted mando’a. <"Let it out, Ven'ika."> Xan was in front of him now, a hand resting on his shoulderas the other arm snaked around his back. He couldn’t help the subtle flinch, only a brief moment, faster than desert lightning when he jerked away from her encroaching form. Then it was gone, and her arms encircled him, supporting him in a hug.

It had been so long since Venku let someone hug him like that. So long since had accepted such comfort. Even now he longed to pull away, but this was Xan. This was the neon colored human that traded insults so easily with him, but was, at the same time, so very hesitant to touch. He longed to pull away, but his mind whispered of the uniqueness of this. It told him to enjoy it and he listened.

<"Do not hold it in.”> She whispered into his ear, too quiet for a normal human to hear. <“Nobody is here."> grey shoulders pulled themselves in. She was lying. It was an obvious lie and for a moment he wondered if she thought him stupid. Because there was someone else here. She was here, wrapped around his shoulders and whispering in his ear. She was here and though she spoke sweet words he knew that the moment he began to talk she would see the truth. He was weak. He was pathetic. A scared child who couldn’t even properly help his people, never mind the half hidden threads in the back of his mind that whispered of his own lies. Never mind the shadowed corner of his mind that was a secret even to himself that spoke of the true reason for his state. He wanted to tell her. He wanted to scream and shout and let her see just how pathetic and weak and scared he really was. But when he opened his mouth, all that came out was a quite “You wouldn’t understand.” And though the words dripped with dejection, they were also coated with exhaustion and no small amount of accusation. Why talk if she wouldn’t even understand?


Xan Deesa Xan Deesa
 
He hesitated and kept fighting back. She could see it in his subtle movements, in his eyes, she could feel it in his tensed body. She knew what was wrong with him. She had seen it before in many people, her ex included. It was only confirmed in his quiet accusation. Her embrace released as she pulled back but her hands remained on his shoulders. She looked up at him with a gentle and understanding gaze. Those advanced contact lenses might have been expensive but it was a damn good investment in this situation.

"<I do."> she muttered softly. "You're supposed to be strong. You're supposed to be fearless for your soldiers and a rock for your people. A true leader... but everybody has a breaking point." she explained to him. "And you've hit yours. But you can't let your people see you as weak, you need to be strong for them. But I'm not your people. I'm not a soldier of yours, I'm not anything of yours. I'm nobody. A ghost. And whatever happens in this room is staying right here." she continued as she gave his armoured shoulders a very gentle shake. "You're doubting yourself. You think you don't deserve this position, you think you're worthless. But you're not. And there's nothing weak about letting go." she stared into his eyes as she spoke with a gentle mutter, only for him to hear.

Right now he was away from his people, with someone that cared about him. She wanted to make sure he understood that. "Let it out." she said again in a faint mutter as she pulled him into another hug.

Venku Bralor Venku Bralor
 

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