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Approved Tech Plasma cord whip

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OUT OF CHARACTER INFORMATION
PRODUCTION INFORMATION
  • Manufacturer: Kragr Loc
  • Affiliation: Kragr Loc
  • Model: Kragr's fibercord plasma whip
  • Modularity: No'
  • Production: Unique
  • Material: Small lightsaber crystal and plasma
SPECIAL FEATURES

  • Draining energy from armour to power the user's own armour and functions
  • The plasma cord can't be cut or otherwise be destroyed by conventional ways.
  • Slowly burns through non-Mandalorian armour
STRENGTHS

  • Vampiric Touch: Once the whip is latched on to a piece of armour, the whip's energy will start to seek out for a source of power that the piece might have installed. (As an example, if the plasma whip latches on around the wrist vambraces, the plasma energy will seek out the power source and drain it) - The plasma whip drains the energy of the armour on which it is attached over time and will eventually deplete the energy of said tech on the armour piece completely.
  • Uncutable: The plasma cord is made of the same material as a lightsaber's blade.
  • Fibercord whip: 20 meters long and able to ensnare an individual.
WEAKNESSES

  • Less power: Due to the functionality as a Fibercord whip, the plasma whip is unable to do the same amount of damage as a conventional lightsabre. Materials which a lightsabre would normally cut through in the blink of an eye will instead successively melt when touched by the whipcord.
  • Less mobile: "Using the plasma cord whip is not without risk to the user which means that they will have to take extra care not to touch it themselves. The non-rigid nature of the cord makes it more unwieldy than a lightsabre. Additionally, since the user will be bound by the target through the cord, their mobility will be limited by this additional weight."
DESCRIPTION
Very much inspired by the Lightwhip, a weapon used in the ancient times by Jedi, Sith and Nightsisters. Though this is modified in a different way and implemented to work as a stronger fibercord whip for catching opponents and draining the energy the enemy's armour is powered by. Powered by a small lightsaber crystal in one of the Vambraces and when fired, the plasma cord whip ensnares an individual, slowly burning through the armour, keeping them from moving. However, if the whip is in contact with flesh and skin, the plasma cord whip burns right through it, like it was nothing just as a lightsaber would.

The plasma cord whip also can't be cut, given the fact that it's made out of plasma.
However, it does come with a couple of drawbacks. Given the fact that it as a much lower burning effect than a lightsaber, not making it effective for cutting. It also provides the user limited movement, as the whip keep the user within 20 meters of the opponent unless they manually shut down the plasma cord whip.
 
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Shawn

Get to the next screen.
Kragr Krayt Kragr Krayt

Alrighty, so there's a few things I wanted to touch upon before we move forwards in the process.

To start off with, under your materials we have a kyber crystal as being listed as one of the materials, for that we're going to need a source, which you can find here, to be listed or hyperlinked.

I also need you to provide a link to your profile as well, which you can list or hyperlink underneath "Manufacturer" where you've listed Kragr Loc already.

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Vampiric Touch: Once the whip is latched on to armour or other things powered by energy, the whip will start to drain the enemy and feed the user's own armour and tech

Next up underneath strengths, I'd like for you to elaborate a bit on this specific strength, as the way it's worded is a bit on the vague side and leaves room for interpretation, as it states that the whip can start to drain an enemy and feed the user's own armor and tech as a result of latching onto someone's armor. I'd like to see this strength elaborated on as it's wording can make it possible to be interpreted as draining an enemy themselves, and not just the armor itself, and also consider expanding it to specify armor which is powered specifically, as not all sets of armor may require a source of power to enable them to function. And lastly, perhaps specify the amount of drain that occurs on a person's armor as well, so it provides both yourself and the effected individual at the time a scale to go base the drain off of in the future.

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Less power: Due to it functioning as a Fibercord whip, the plasma whip is unable to do the same amount of damage as a conventional lightsaber.
Less mobile: Using the plasma cord whip, makes the user less mobile and has to manually shut down the whip.

Moving onto tthe weaknesses, for the "Less Power" weakness, i'd like for you to expand on just how much damage the Plasma Cord Whip may cause in comparison to a conventional lightsaber. Down in the description it states it has a lower burning effect, but if possible I'd like for you to give a bit more insight into what that lower effect is in comparison with a standard lightsaber.

As for the "less mobile" weakness, a little more of an explanation into just how it makes the user less mobile would also be appreciated if possible. As in, what does it specifically do to limit one's mobility aside from having to use it and manually shut down the weapon, if you catch my drift.

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Once you've proceeded with making edits to the submission, feel free to let me know and we'll go from there o7
 

Shawn

Get to the next screen.
Kragr Krayt Kragr Krayt

Thanks for the edits!

We don't recommend using hard numbers, as it can make for hard set rules that prevent things from being written dynamically in roleplay. So perhaps let's try using more descriptive language to elaborate on the aforementioned strength and two weaknesses that were addressed on from before ^^

So once you've made some more edits feel free to tag me and we can go from there!
 
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